Kissing Itself Is Wildly Underrated Imo. Personally Speaking I Can Get Wet As Hell Just From A Good,

This is the perfect moment for Vine to do the funniest thing possible

what did they put in the word faggot that makes it so hot to be called during sex

It is perhaps the greatest honor to make fellow faggots horny

we need to start romanticizing doing household chores in tank tops and sweatpants in the same way that we romanticize knighthood and i am not fucking kidding

hey sorry for getting really pissy at you earlier because I could hear you chewing. see I have a condition called [remembers pathologizing my behavior is unhelpful] it's actually because I hate you, specifically,

Boys are for throwing around and manhandling. It's just roughhousing after all.

I know that some people get very nervous around the idea of having sex while under the influence, but don’t worry, I’ll guide you.

You can come sit on my lap and I’ll hold your cup or can or whatever and help you drink it down, all while my other hand feels you over your underwear. We’ll go nice and slow, I won’t slip my fingers into them until you whisper in a drawl that you want it. If you really struggle with it, I can take the sip of your drink or take the shot for you and spit it into your mouth through a kiss. That way there’s less thinking work for you.

You can take an edible or something and I’ll slowly start to go down on you while you’re in a nice and hazey. If you’re comfortable with smoking, maybe I’d let you take a few hits off my joint, or again I can shotgun them to you, make even getting stoned something out of your responsibility. Just lay down and let me make you feel good.

I’ll tell you everything I’m doing and everything I’m going to do. I’ll make sure you’re as comfortable and care free as you can be while I work orgasm after orgasm out of you when you’re in your own little world.