Actuallymealex - Jojalbihn

I miss Fumblethatch dingelpoop

It's called Ohio

God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to.

Kevin had a bad day

Will use in my champaign

Tired of everyone having darkvision? Try this instead:

Dwarves: Tremorsense 60ft., lighter darkvision 60ft. (like darkvision but only in dim light).

Rock gnomes: Tremorsense 60ft.

Forest gnomes: Keen hearing.

Half elves: Lighter darkvision 60ft.

Half orcs: Lighter darkvision 60ft. and keem hearing.

Dragonborn: Infravision 60ft. (in dim light and darkness you can distinguish creatures and objects that have cleary another temperature than their surroundings).

Tiefling: Lighter darkvision 60ft., infravision 60ft. (only in darkness).

Elves, halflings and humans stay the same.

What do you think?

Cambell corn soup

"Look into my mouth" I say, my cold eyes staring into the depths of your soul.

You turn towards me and relucantly watch as i open my gaping jaw.

You don't notice it at first but suddenly you smell the foul oder.

"I havent brushed in two days"

A large grin on my face, my teeth all brown and mushy.

You watch in terror as my teeth slowly slide out of my mouth and into yours.

"Nothing shall go to waste" I whisper

You close your eyes because you dont want to see the scene unfolding in front of you.

Suddenly you feel a soft sensation on your tounge and a sweet taste fills your mouth.

"Corn" you wisper, a single tear rolling down your cheek.

You feel your teeth being pushed out, and replaced by something that can only be described as hard corn cernels.

You are now fully ugly crying. The only sounds are your cries, echoing in the empty starbucks bathroom.

Your eyes, being consumed by crawling corn cernels. All you see is corn, slowly replacing every part of what was once you.

You have lost all your senses, except touch and taste.

You feel as though a metal rind is being placed between you and freedom.

You feel as though you are being picked up...

"Mmm, cambell corn soup. My favorite." You hear, as a giant figure, resembling a grandmother apears in your mind.

You feel their grip upon you...

You are cambell corn soup.

You are corn.

Nothing shall go to waste.

Will be using in my campaign

100 Warm Up DnD Character Questions

If your character wasn’t an adventurer, what livelihood would they lead?

Who in the party would your character trust the most with their life?

What are your character’s core moral beliefs?

What relationship does your character have with their parents and siblings?

Does your character have any biases for or against certain races?

What is your character’s opinion on nobility? On authority?

Describe your character’s current appearance: clothes, armor, scars they’ve picked up along the journey, etc.

What location encountered in the campaign has your character felt the most “at home” in, or just generally liked the most?

What deity, if any, does your character worship? What’s their opinion on other people’s worship?

If your character had time to pick up any artisan’s tools, game set, instrument, etc., what would it be?

Describe your character’s current relationship with the player character sitting to your right.

What is your character’s current goal, summed up in one sentence?

Does your character ever want to “settle down” with a spouse, children, house, etc.?

Has your character ever been in love?

What battle in the campaign has been most memorable to your character?

If your character wasn’t whatever class they are, what would they be instead?

What is your character’s favorite season?

What would your character’s Zodiac sign be, following stereotypical astrology?

Where in the world does your character most want to visit?

What is the biggest mistake your character has ever made?

Does your character have any noticeable scars? If so, what are their stories?

What animal best represents your character?

If your character could go back in time and change one thing about their life, what would it be?

Which other player character does your character find themselves having the most in common with?

Does your character regret any particular choice the party has made?

What would your character say their best trait would be?

What is your character’s greatest fear? Deep, irrational?

What is currently motivating your character to stay with the party?

What are your character’s hobbies and interests outside of their class?

What would most people think when they first see your character?

What stereotypical group role does your character play in the party? (The Mom, the Mess, the Comic Relief, etc. Optionally: What role would your character play in the “Five Man Band” structure?)

What is your character the most insecure about?

What person does your character admire most?

What does your character admire and dislike the most about the player character sitting to your left?

Why is your character’s lowest stat their lowest (the in-character reason, not “because there’s no reason for a wizard to have 16 strength, duh”)?

What would be your character’s theme song/favorite band/favorite genre of music?

What stereotypical role would your character play in a high school AU/if they attended a normal high school? (Nerd, jock, bully, goth, etc.)

What treasure/item/artifact that your character has collected during the adventure is the most important to them?

Is there any particular weapon, item, etc. that your character longs to find?

Where does your character feel the most at home?

Does your character care about how they’re perceived by others? How do they change themselves to fit in with other people?

What does your character think is the true meaning of life?

What is your character’s scent? (Bonus points for a description that sounds like it could be from a bad [or awesome] fanfic.)

Does your character think more with their heart or their brain?

What is your character’s most recent or frequent nightmare?

What opinion does your character have on [CERTAIN ESTABLISHED GROUPS/AUTHORITIES IN THE GAME WORLD]? (Dragonmarked Houses, royal crown, etc.)

How did your character spend their childhood? Where did they grow up/who were their childhood friends?

What aspect of your character’s future are they most curious about? (If they could know one thing about the future, what would it be?)

What colors are associated with your character?

Who in the party would your character prioritize rescuing, in dire circumstances?

Is your character the most swayed by ethos, pathos, or logos?

If your character was granted a single use of Wish, what would they use it for?

What is your character’s favorite spell? If they don’t use spells: what is their favorite personal weapon/combat maneuver/skill/etc.?

How does your character feel about keeping secrets from the rest of the party?

What type of creature in the world is your character the most intrigued by?

When they were a child, what did your character want to be, or think they were going to be, when they grew up?

The player character to your left admits that they’re passionately in love with your character. How would your character respond?

If somebody (an NPC, someone from their backstory, etc.) your character trusts/loves asked your character to do something against the party’s best interest, who would they side with?

Does your character value their own best interest more than the party’s?

What decision would the party have to make in order for your character to consider splitting off from the group?

How does your character imagine the way they will die?

What is your character’s greatest achievement?

Is your character willing to risk the well-being of others in order to achieve their goal?

What is your character’s opinion on killing others?

What is your character’s favorite food? Beverage?

How generous is your character? Especially to those they don’t know?

What is your character the most envious about, regarding anyone in the party?

The player character to your left and the player character to your right are both telling your character two different versions of the truth. Who does your character believe?

What is your character’s sexuality/relationship with sex?

What is your character’s biggest pet peeve?

Describe how your character feels about the party’s current situation/objective/etc.

Who in the party would your character trust the most to keep an important secret?

If your character knew that they were going to die in a month, how would they spend the rest of their life?

What makes your character feel safe?

If your character had the chance to rename the party/give the party a name, no questions asked, what would it be?

What memory does your character want to forget the most?

If your character had to multiclass into a class they currently aren’t the next time they level up, what would it be and what reason would they have for doing so?

What television/book/video game/etc. character would your character be best friends with? (Or: what media character is your character the most influenced by/similar to?

What unusual talents does your character possess?

How does your character feel about receiving/giving orders? Are they more of a leader, or a follower?

What does your character’s name represent to them? (Or: why as a player did you choose your character’s name?)

Is your character more of an introvert, or an extrovert?

How far is your character willing to go to pursue the “greater good”? Do they believe in a greater good at all?

What does your character want to be remembered by?

What would be your character’s major in college?

Does your character consider themselves a hero, villain, or something else?

What major arcana tarot card best represents your character?

Where does your character see themselves in 20 years?

What is your character’s relationship with magic? Are they scared of it, wish to know more about it, indifferent to it?

Who is your character’s biggest rival?

What is your character’s guiltiest pleasure?

What does your character hope for the afterlife?

Who in the party does your character trust the least?

What is your character’s biggest flaw?

How did your character learn the languages that they speak?

What is your character’s favorite school of magic/type of weaponry?

What is most important to your character: health, wealth, or happiness?

What advice would your character give to a younger version of themselves?

Are there any social or political issues your character feels strongly about?

What, currently, is your character the most curious about?

taken from here courtesy of @greyjediluke

Water hits different after midnight... it got that crisp icy feeling... mmm worter

Idea: Surprise Titans

a.k.a. the Murderhobo’s Natural Predator.

You know what’s fun? Setting up powerful enemies to destroy your party of murderhobos. You know what’s even more fun? Hiding these powerful enemies in plain sight.

This idea has probably been done repeatedly, but I just want to bring in a few of my own ideas for a few different Murderhobo situations.

Option 1: Hiding amongst the weak.

a.k.a. Marble Bunny application

Does your game have a “Beginner’s Mook” like Dragon Quest slimes, Goombas in the Mario series, or Kingdom Hearts’ basic Shadow Heartless? The most basic enemies that are meant to be the first encounter for the players? Do your murderhobos enjoy slaughtering these monsters - or any monster for that matter - in genocidal abundance?

An old friend of mine once introduced me to what he called the Marble Bunny application: essentially, take these two sprites:

The White Bunny

and the Marble Bunny. Now I added some animation and color differences, but the point of the application is that a weak, beginner mook and an extremely powerful monster are virtually indistinguishable… until someone tries taking a swing at it. Then they watch in horror as what looks like just a White Bunny takes zero damage, hunts them down like a dragon, and hits like a train.

This application can be taken in cross-species or cross-animation paths as well: imagine the party sees what appears to be a farmer out in the field.

What ought to happen: PC: I go say hi! :D DM: On closer inspection, it is not a farmer but rather a golem fashioned to look like a Scarecrow. What happens to Murderhobos: PC: I shoot the farmer with an arrow. DM: Instead of dying, the being simply lifts its arrow-pierced head to stare right at at you. It is a golem, and it has just found its master’s next threat. Roll for initiative!

Side note: this can also be a nice incentive/perk for your players who just like to make pets out of monstrous enemies. It’s like adding Shiny- or IV-Hunting to your game for them!

Option 2: Logical Arguments

a.k.a. “What else did you expect to happen?”

Obviously, sometimes the roleplay itself can give reason to certain advantages. Paladins are effective against the undead, magic and ranged attacks are superior to melee combat, etc. But don’t forget: such lore can give advantage to special monster or NPC cases against murderhobos.

Some examples:

Murderhobo attacks a blacksmith? Congrats, they just pissed off Will Turner. He’s trained with the swords every day to figure out what needs cleaning, repairs, etc. and now has advantage with (and against) every weapon type in his shop.

They attacked X students at a school for magic? Great, the only reason they were off-campus to begin with is because they’re the X best students of the top class, and will quickly reduce the murderhobos into smoking ash.

Your murderhobos want to assassinate the king for rule over the entire kingdom, instead of negotiating a piece for a quest reward? Congrats, one of the townspeople loyal to the king ratted the party out, the assassination turns into an ambush, and either the party pays with their lives, or run for what remains of their lives. Negotiation was too challenging for the players, so now it’ll never be on the table again.

Your combo- and DPS-loving murderhobo wants to test their combos on an innocent traveling group? Such pilgrims are usually guided by the magical and religious… like diviners. At some point, the combo artist swings their sword and has the blade caught by the future-seer. Your precious combos mean nothing to one who can see your every move.

Final word: Sorry I’ve been gone for a while, you guys. Emotionally bad times recently, plus nearing the end of college and worrying about internships and/or jobs.

Happy gaming, good luck murdering the murderhobos!

*Wears a shirt that says sassy but the S and Y is taped over with white tape so it says "Ass"*

Hell yeah