Can’t Stop Thinking About Cameron And Charlie Actually Being Friends. Like They Were Roommates, Do

“So, uh, Chris, where you in school?”

a uni survival guide: tips from a phd

if there's one thing i know about, it's college. i've done it, i've taught it, i've lived and breathed it. these tips are for first years in particular, but honestly for everybody. i think it's so important for people to have balanced lives in these years -- academics are not everything. you know what didn't help me in the real world when i was afraid i wouldn't live through it? my fancy college note-taking format. you know what did help me? the friends i made there who i knew would get on a plane and fly across the country in a matter of hours if i told them i needed them.

academic

- figure out where class is held ahead of time: don't be that kid who's late on day one, i beg of you

- use the writing center: especially for basic grammatical editing, which a lot of professors don't have time to mark on papers

- speak up in class: talking through ideas helps you work through them, and asking questions about something you don't understand can open up great lines of conversation

- find a regular schedule that works for you and stick to it: my college schedule was morning free time, class, lunch, class, practice, homework. that consistency was a life-saver

- keep a planner: it's so important to have a central place to track deadlines, assignments, and engagements

- annotate your reading: when you're stressing about a paper topic, being able to go back to what you've highlighted and written in the margins is a life-saver

- color-code your coursework: i use the same color highlighter, pen, and notebook for any given class. it's super helpful

- if you can't focus while studying with friends, don't: i reserved group studying for days when i didn't have important work because i can't be in a room with other people without talking to them. if your school has one, the quiet floor of the library is your best friend

- treat yourself to a "fun" class: art was always my place to just sit back and chill, a way to end the night all zen in the darkroom instead of conjugating russian verbs in a fluorescent-lit cinderblock prison. for you, it could be gym, it could be pottery, it could be some random course about, like, the history of cooking or something -- explore!

- profs are people too: don't be too nervous around them. also, know that if you're struggling -- even b/c of something in your personal life -- you can admit it, and they'll almost always understand why you missed a deadline or bombed a test

- go to office hours: it's the only way to get to know professors in big courses, and it's so helpful for both your grades and learning how to navigate relationships with authority figures

social

- don't let academia keep you from your friends: it's a case-by-case basis, but sometimes it's okay to let the reading slide and spend time with friends. i graduated seven years ago and my college group text still talks every day. that's so much more important to me than the fact that i never finished brideshead revisited

- joining a club is one of the best ways to make friends: i played ultimate frisbee through college and it was the source of so many lasting relationships, as well as the way i met all my local friends when i was abroad

- say yes to things you don't know if you'll like: you'll surprise yourself. me? turns out i love drinking games. and theme parties. and skinny dipping. and rock climbing

- don't be that person who looks down on their peers for partying: honestly? that person kind of sucks. you don't have to party if you don't want to, but actually, a lot of those people are super nice and also good at school -- don't just write them off!

- show up for your friends: go to their games, their concerts, their art shows, their standup nights. show them that what matters to them matters to you, too

- set aside a night to do a group activity with others: whether your vibe is wednesday night trivia, a weekly "terrible movie" showing, or a get-high-and-watch-nature-documentaries-type thing, these are great ways to liven up the week and de-stress

- this is a great time to figure out who from high school really matters to you: you don't have to force relationships that were built mostly on convenience if there are friends at uni with whom you click more. people you became friends with purely based on the coincidence of where your parents lived do not have to be your forever friends. they can be! but they don't have to be

personal

- don't expect too much of yourself: a 4.0 is not the end-all, be-all. if your family or somebody tells you it is, tell them to call me, and i will personally talk some sense into them

- take advantage of university support services: mental health counseling, free yoga classes, multi-cultural societies, etc

- drink water: please, please don't get kidney stones in the middle of the semester, says the girl who got kidney stones in the middle of the semester

- let yourself take breaks: if you need to lie to a professor and say you're sick when really you're just feeling down and you need to sit in bed and watch a movie, that's totally valid

- don't freak about individual assignments: my students come to me freaking over a B+ and i tell them, honey, no job interviewer is ever going to ask you about your second paper from communications 101. i wish i'd known that

- go see speakers if there's someone interesting coming to campus: these talks are always cooler than you expect. i'll never get over the fact that i didn't go see anita hill when she came to my undergrad

- do your laundry on the same night every week: i can't explain why this is so helpful but it really is

- keep up on the news and the memes: read the school paper, the school blog, the memes page -- college politics and inside jokes are fun and convoluted and fascinating

- set the groundwork for long-term self-care: all of the above is really just to say -- university isn't just for learning about the french revolution, it's also about learning how to balance, how to handle failure, how to ask for help, how to make a salad that doesn't totally suck, etc

One of the prettiest moments in winter is when the sun starts to come out again in like february/march but it’s still cold but that doesn’t matter because everything feels light and fresh and you walk outside without freezing because the sunshine is warming your face and everything is starting to wake up

Okay, so:

Upon meeting Todd: is he, ya know,*hand gay gesture*

“I think neil is my favourite” *soft smile* (Oh noooo)

Laughs at todds improv poem, goes silent, “ahhhhhhhh” 

“Half a roll?”

Saxophone in the cave scene: “Oh shit! Buddy can play it! I thought his only skill was making turkey noises” 

“Oh this movie is making me feel things.”

About the unmanned flying desk set: *soft eyes* oh it was so good but so sad

Charlie talking to Gloria: *I made that up* “haha! No you didn’t!”

“Can they kick the girls out again?”

Neil, is doing nothing: I love neil!!

“I knew this man was a prune.” (To Nolan when he stood up before the phone call from God scene)

After the play: oh no. oh no, *looks me dead in the eyes* you fucker

When Charlie punches cameron: Suck it less valid red head!

*camera pans to Pitts, during the end scene* Yes!! You got this Pittsie!!

After, the movie: You fucker you fucker, you made me feel things

About to introduce The Dead Poets Society to my best friend, will update on his thoughts.

ok but one thing i love about goncharov is the ironic subversion of themes. like we have katya, the madonna-like character whose white palette screams of loyalty and purity, while andrey is the judas-like character whose motifs are the dagger and the poisoned cup.

but at the end, it’s katya who draws a gun on goncharov, and andrey who’s left holding his bleeding body in his arms. by having the “loyal wife” be the backstabber and the “doublecrosser” be the broken-hearted lover, scorsese subverts both biblical imagery and gender roles, and he does it in such a subtle and poetic way too, without taking away the complexity of either character. 

About to introduce The Dead Poets Society to my best friend, will update on his thoughts.

Kind of love university only because all of my friends put down what dates I have tournaments into their calendars so that way they can arrange study sessions around it..

ᴅᴇᴀᴅ ʙᴏʏ ᴅᴇᴛᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇꜱ | ᴇᴅᴡɪɴ + ᴏᴜᴛꜰɪᴛꜱ

charlie dalton calls anything that inconveniences him homophobic and that's canon