You Know I Bet Vader Could Easily Fix The Whole Ever Given Suez Canal Problem. Smh At Us Weaklings. (This

Then there’s Mrs. Cole. The suspicious, strict matron who takes no shit and was probably the one to threaten Tom with institutionalization. 

When Tom was a child she was probably in her prime, but as Tom got older so did she. And as parents (bc Mrs. Cole was probably the closest thing like that for Tom and probably some other orphans too) get older they become less strict... on the younger kids. 

And if there’s anything the older kids can agree on it’s that the younger kids have it way better. And the parent remembers absolutely none of the strict rules they put on the oldest kids. Gaslighting at it’s finest (see kallmekris sibling series on TikTok for inspiration).  

Smol Orphan: *leaves a dead rat and broken glass in another kid’s bed.*

Mrs. Cole: ...

Amy: oh that kid’s done for. 

Dennis: He better say his prayers. 

Mrs. Cole: ...Leave, I’ll clean it. Just don’t do it again. 

Tom: That’s it?! You locked me in my room for 2 weeks after the rabbit incident! 

Billy: You made me write lines on the entire Old Testament when I broke a window!

Mrs. Cole: That doesn’t sound like me. I never did that, you’re all so dramatic. 

Tom: *dark lord energy manifests*

Tom Riddle & The Orphanage

I’ve already talked about the under-utilization of Nobby Leach, but what about the Orphanage? 

As someone who had to live with several people (adults & children both) who made my life miserable and disliked me just as much as I disliked them…there’s no way Tom Riddle was able to avoid them all to the degree canon wants you to believe. 

Sure he has his own room, but he still has to eat, take care of his hygiene, do his chores, go to church, help with the younger children, etc. He’s going to have to interact with the other orphans and matrons at the orphanage, there’s no way around that. 

And some of the other kids may be afraid of him, but children have no fear and are always ready to test boundaries. The adults, Mrs. Cole, especially are already suspicious of him, and you bet the other kids are aware and take advantage of this to taunt and subvert Tom’s authority in front of them. 

Outside of this, there’s also no way to hate everyone and everything at the orphanage all the time. There will be some good moments because that kind of lasting hatred just is…not viable. If not on Tom’s end, then the other kids will undoubtedly become tired of tip-toeing around him. And when the bombs start to fall…no one’s going to give a shit about Tom Riddle and his weirdness, they have bigger things to worry about. And they’re all stuck together anyway. 

Let’s examine some of the relationships Tom had with the other orphans. Tom gets into a fight with Billy Stubbs and, according to Mrs. Cole, hangs his rabbit.  On a trip, Tom lures Denny Bishop & Amy Benson into a cave and traumatized them for life with something so horrible they can’t bear to speak of it.  

Nothing about what caused the argument with Billy Stubbs or why Tom chose those specific orphans to traumatize for life. Because luring two suspicious, jaded orphans into a cave where no one can hear them scream? That would take planning and a big enough motive that Tom thought the risk of Mrs. Cole catching him doing something weird again was worth it. 

But do I believe they were traumatized “for life?” No probably not. This is baby Riddle, not Dark Lord Voldemort, he’s new to the traumatizing children thing. 

So here’s where I go into the more questionable headcanon I have about the orphanage: Tom Riddle has a sibling relationship with these kids he supposedly traumatized. 

Hear me out. 

Tom killed Billy’s rabbit and traumatized Dennis & Amy; how is that sibling-like? 

I can tell you from personal experience. I have 9 siblings (technically) and several cousins who barge into my house uninvited. I also grew up on stories my mom had about her 3 siblings and my grandma had about her 11. My mom pushed her sister off a roof and cut off a piece of her tongue with safety scissors while she was sleeping. Me and the sister closest to my age drive each other crazy. Siblings are the worst to each other. 

Now these kids may not have chosen to be siblings, but rarely does anyone get that choice anyway. (And if they do, they have moments where they regret it).  

It first starts out with annoying the shit out of each other. You know, barging into their room and not closing the door when they leave, ganging up on the youngest (probably Tom), stealing each other’s toys and hiding them-Oh. OH. 

…See where I’m going there? 

Then once they get older they grow to tolerate each other and gang up on the much more frustrating younger generation of kids who’ve taken up residence in their orphanage. They’ll have to find a compromise on splitting up chores and they’ll need to have the option to talk to people they’re age. Cue reluctant siblings who refuse to admit their siblings. 

Tom Riddle: Why do I get the night shift again?

Amy Benson, to Dennis: Hey, remember that time Tom dragged us to a cave and traumatized us?

Billy Stubbs: And killed my rabbit?

Dennis Bishop: And stole my toys? 

Tom Riddle: You’re never letting this go are you. 

Dennis, Amy, & Billy: Never. 

These 4 kids grew up together and, if they were not adopted-out, grew into adulthood together. 

TL:DR

Tom Riddle does not give off only-child vibes. Discuss. 

Currently obsessed with the concept of Danny 100% being the most Violent and youngest Wayne. I'm so sorry but the writing opportunity🥹🤌

Danny's rogues were all dead so they can't actually... Die again. Like— not in the normal way, that is. The only way that they could die is by crushing their core.

Cue Bruce Wayne and the whole family Finding out his extremely timid and closed off son/brother (yes, being ooc is the point here stfu😭) is arguably the strongest being in the universe and admitting that he has a tendency to have intrusive thoughts and horrible mood swings so he doesn't trust himself with doing the family's... 'business' (knowing damn well he could kill someone if he gets too agitated) and they're almost not convinced.

Emphasis on almost.

Once they watched as the youngest of them all completely threw down a weird eyeball (they later learn is an 'observant'), threw a green dagger right beside it, kicked it violently and threatened to gauge it's eye out and disintegrate it for interrupting their dinner.

He apologized to the family soon after the thing disappeared, back to completely timid and embarrassed.

Extra, Danny finding out about Joker:

News: Joker found dead in strange circumstances!

Bruce, turning to Danny: Danny....

Danny, who placed a bounty on Joker AND his soul in the ghost zone: *gasp* He died of strange circumstances? How unfortunate!

Danny: I didn't do anything, my hands are clean!

Bruce: *sigh* Chum...

Jason, in the background: Kid ilysm you're my favorite brother now

Snape is so physically non violent it's honestly kind of weird, considering how nasty he can be verbally. He's by some distance the nastiest Hogwarts teacher in the classroom (I'm ignoring some of the DADA outliers), but at the same time he's by far the most responsible in terms of student safety and appropriate punishments. He's one of the very few who never endangers them in some manner, and the one who most goes out of his way to protect them. I wonder why that is. With Harry it's fairly simple to see why, given that he sees him as James yet has promised to protect him. With other students it isn't so simple.

Alastor's Furby Organ - Fic Prompt

Vox is attempting to sell the benefits of advancing technology to Alastor for the umpteenth time, either genuinely or patronizingly, when Alastor sees it.

The second greatest piece of technology he's ever laid eyes on.

He interrupts Vox in the middle of his tirade and zips up to it and is absolutely tickled pink by its creepiness and charming exterior.

Alastor, trying not to sound excited: And what's this delightful little thing?

Vox: Oh that's a Furby, a creepy kids toy up top, we're thinking of scrapping it actually-

Alastor: Oh? Then maybe I can take them off your hands.

Time skip to a few months later, Alastor and Vox are having another battle (duet) when Alastor manifests a new instrument Vox has never seen him play before made up of-

Oh no. no. no. nononono. NO.

A fucking Furby Organ!?

DC X DP Prompt

Danny, on a time mission for Clockwork, drags an injured Alfred Pennyworth across the Beach to safety on D-Day. While performing first aid, Danny gets clipped by a bullet, but hopped up on adrenaline, he doesn’t notice and his blood, imbued with ectoplasm, comes into contact with Alfred’s wounds.

80 years later, on the run from the GIW and his parents, Danny runs to Gotham where he meets a surprisingly spry 100 year old man, not looking a day over 60.

Radiohusk Analysis: Alastor Cares or Nothing Makes Sense (Part 1)

In the pilot, Alastor needs to bribe Husk to work as the bartender for his new fun project, Hazbin Hotel (HH)! However, as we're told in season 1 episode 5, Alastor has Husk's soul, and therefore, can make Husk do whatever. So why the fuck does Alastor need to bribe him? What reason would he feel compelled to do that if he already has the power to make Husk to anything he wants? Let's discuss some possible options.

A) Alastor feels as if he needs the extra incentive to get Husk to do his job.

This argument has no substance to me because we see in season 1 episode 5 that Alastor has no quelms with putting Husk (or anyone) in their place. If Alastor needed Husk to be obedient and to attend the bar for the hotel, Alastor could have just threatened Husk and reminded him that he has no choice, considering he has his soul.

B) Vivziepop forgot that in the canon pilot that she wrote Husk as needing to be bribed in order to work the bar.

This is very possible, considering Vivziepop did not write or create the dynamic and most of the interactions that makes Husk and Alastor's relationship. That being said, it is possible that she wouldn't remember the details of their dynamic/interaction from the pilot, but also not understand the characters and their relationship.

C) Alastor cares.

Alastor wants Husk to be satisfied under his care. It is the only narrative that makes sense, whether it was Viv's intention or not. Alastor gives Husk a choice to work at the hotel. It is why Alastor decides to bribe him instead of using his power and authority to do make Husk work the bar.

Alastor also listens to Husk's concerns about Mimzy and considers him. Alastor also trusts Husk enough to let him know his secret involving being on Lilith's leash.

THERE IS RESPECT AND TRUST THERE! He even lets Husk put a finger on him (making their argument physical!)

I mean, Alastor could have easily ripped Husk a new asshole for putting hands on him and verbally attacking Alastor by weaponizing the fact that he also has a leash around his neck, but he didn't.

Let's not forget that Alastor has 'killed' for less! He attacks Sir Pentious for tearing a piece of his coat!

You might be thinking something along the lines of If Alastor cares, why did he threaten Husk?

Nothing is black and white, the least of all relationships, especially relationships in Hell. Alastor isn't exactly a good guy. You can still care about someone and hurt/lash out at them. Also, Husk said something that was aimed to hurt Alastor. It's like if someone you trusted one day said, "That's why your dad left" in the middle of an argument. I'd be pissed too! I wouldn't fucking put a finger on them or threaten them (because I'm not made up of the same stuff a sinner in disney hell is), but it's understandable Alastor would BECAUSE IT'S HELL. Also, the fact that Alastor didn't even hurt Husk during this scene is proof enough that Alastor cares deeply and evidence that the pushing of Angel-Val parallels on this duo is absolute bullshit and makes no sense.

Whether Vivzie forgot or not, what is important is that her perspective of the story is not the only one that matters. A writer can have a specific vision in mind for their story and the characters in it; however, the viewer has the liberty to interpret the text however they want based on their imagination, experience, and relationships. Viewer interpretation helps to broaden perspectives and open up potential interpretations that differ from the writer's original perspective.

Goncharov (1973) dir. Martin Scorsese

“The greatest mafia movie (n)ever made.”

It should be read from left to right and up to down. My comfort doujinshies. They're so funny. I'd watch them be stupid, my god. Please, look at this and tell me, isn't this what mstans should thrive for instead of being a snater or a self-claimed-not-hp-fan-but-an-mstan type.

These two doujinshies are my oasis in the Sahara of Snape hate. It's so rare to find Snape with marauders in 1 art. My babies. My treasures.

Ps: not my art

I know everyone's already said this, but Vox is so funny because he's quite literally the most competent and professional Vee.

EXCEPT for when it comes to Alastor.

Like, HE’S the one who had to calm down Valentino and keep him from making a scene. (Especially because, yes, it looks bad if they can't control their employees, but - even in hell - it looks even worse if their top pornstar has to be dragged to the studio vs walking in on his own).

Velvette doesn't give a shit about professionalism. Like, Vox wanted to talk to Carmine about Angelic Security, and you think THAT'S how he wanted Velvette to treat her to try to guarantee them working together? Absolutely not.

(Also, Vox being able to immediately turn the tide of the paparazzi harassing him about news that JUST broke? Granted, he did use his hypnosis, but it wouldn't have worked if he didn't immediately come up with something on the fly. He knows how to keep his company running AND looking good, as WELL as being innovative enough to create new things with little to no notice.)

The other two Vees? I would not trust either of them to be the public speaker or the face of the company the way Vox is. Do you think either Velvette or Valentino would have been able to come up with a solution to the moved-up Extermination date in a way that pleased the general public?

But then. Some old timey radio deer shows back up and he immediately breaks down and can't plan for shit.

He sings a silly little song and immediately gets owned to the point he loses power to the entire city.

He plans to break in using a dude they KNOW is incompetent, and his only response when it (obviously) fails is to fucking gamer anon hate with "hahaha kys loser!" and the second he is confronted with Alastor’s face he can't do anything. He doesn't even try a single other thing after this point, cutting his loses entirely.

And THEN he avoids the meeting sending Velvette instead, potentially fucking up their ability to collaborate because he can't handle seeing Alastor.

This bisexual wreck of a television doesn't fucking leave his gamer dungeon once since Alastor is back, doing everything he can to avoid seeing him in real life.

Like, imagine what dealing with Vox is like from Alastor's perspective. HE never sees the professionalism or competence - he ONLY ever gets the pathetic mew-mew Vox!

Alastor is constantly being told how competent Vox is with his company and shit, but the second he's in the same room with him Vox is glitching and can't walk in a straight line without running into a wall or something. If I were Alastor, I'd have fun teasing the television too, because, like, what's wrong with him? It's funny!

Like, does Alastor register that this treatment is only for him, or does he think the rest of hell is pathetic enough to not notice or to just accept it? Does Alastor think Vox is like this all the time, and he's using his hypnosis to make everyone else forget about it?

Vox is just such a funny man, he has one weakness and it's just Alastor - and Alastor isn't even doing anything, he's just nearby minding his own goddamn business, lmao.

Imagine dannys rouges fighting him thinking he is like one of the older ghosts because they can't detect his ghost core at all and thats a old ghost thing

But it's because dannys core isn't fully funded until one day he gets caught by his parents and they go vivisection on him

He flees and one of the rogues find him and are like "oh god he's just a baby, a hurt baby, oh my god I have been throwing down with a baby.... I have beaten by a baby"

And they all fly around him anxiously and teaching him stuff because suddenly he's so weak! What happened!

Then the parents get him again but worse and he flees the universe

It only takes them around two weeks to find them and he is in the middle of being held up by the joker as hostage when "BOOM" the joker gets body slammed by the skulker

Now we got skrunkly Danny with his league of caretakers against the world