“I Write Slowly… With Depth…”

I break inside every time you make me choose

I don't want to hurt you

I never wanted to hurt you

It was never my intention to build some wall

But I always find myself having to choose between you and him

If I follow you, I'm a good daughter

But I'd be wearing a mask everywhere we go

If I follow my heart, I'm a rebel

I get a disrespectful and ungrateful label

I would continue walking, feeling like I am stabbing you as I go

I never wanted to choose

I just want my decisions respected

I just want to honor the words and plans I've commited

Is it wrong to not bend for you?

Is it wrong for me to follow my decisions?

I am so tired of trying to please you

I can't seem to do enough

Everything I do is a disappointment

That's all I see every time you look at me

From the way you talk to the way you move

You are disappointed that I'm the daughter you have

I'm sorry

If I could just die now so you don't have to worry

If I could just die now so you get to have the daughter you want

I am willing to

Just so you can be happy

"i’d undress your mind first"

by Astrum.

i wouldn’t rush you.

i’d start slow —

trace the curve of your thoughts

long before i ever touched your skin.

i’d ask how you sleep when it rains,

what keeps you awake when it’s silent,

and where you ache when no one’s looking.

i’d want to know

the shape of your sigh,

the weight of your dreams,

the taste of your laugh

in the dark.

when you’d trust me enough,

i’d kiss your scars with my words,

bite your insecurities softly

between conversations,

and hold your secrets

like they were silk on my tongue.

and maybe,

if your eyes begged for it,

i’d undress you slow too.

but i promise —

your mind would be bare

long before your body ever was.

It's crazy how giant squids and sperm whales just have like giant kaiju battles down in the deepest depths everyday and it's real

"i’d memorize you in ways you forgot you existed"

"i’d memorize you in ways you forgot you existed" by Astrum

i wouldn’t ask for permission to admire you — i’d just do it. quietly. thoroughly. like i was built to notice you and no one else.

i’d memorize the way your breath hitches when you’re almost smiling, the exact second your eyes soften when you let your guard down, and the curve of your lips when you almost say what you’re scared to feel.

i’d learn you like my favorite song — not rushed, but looped forever. until every sigh, every glance, every unspoken ache was part of my heartbeat.

and when you forget how rare you are, i’d whisper it against your neck, press it into your skin, etch it into your bones — until you remembered that being wanted never had to hurt.

“I don’t ask for forever — I just ask for real”

I don’t want promises painted gold at midnight only to peel by morning. I don’t crave fairytales that fall apart the moment reality touches them. I just want someone who looks me in the eyes and says — “I can’t guarantee always… but I can give you honesty. I can give you the kind of love that doesn’t flinch when things get messy. The kind that stays soft even when life turns hard.” I want real. I want the kind of connection that doesn’t vanish when I forget how to smile or when I show my scars instead of my skin. I want fingertips that trace not just my body, but my brokenness — and still choose to stay. Don’t promise me forever. Promise me presence. Promise me truth, even if it’s inconvenient. Promise me warmth that doesn’t run when I collapse at 2 AM. I don’t ask for perfect. I just ask for real. Because real is rare, and rare is enough to be everything.

♥️☕︎︎.

“When you love me like gravity”

By Astrum

you don’t have to demand me — i give myself the moment your eyes soften. when you speak with quiet certainty, it feels like gravity brushing my spine — reminding me that falling is safe when it’s into you. i obey not because i must, but because you make devotion taste like freedom and love feels like breath. say stay and i will curl into your chest like a song that never wants to end. tell me wait and i will sit patiently, because i know the wait ends with your smile. you don’t break me — you hold me until all my sharp edges melt into the shape of us. with you, Obedience is not surrender. it’s coming home. again, and again, and again.

i raise it, hold it in front of me. show you, through someone else, a peek inside myself. a keen eye can see through it—but cutting words glance off at an angle. it's not me, just a reflection. and isn't that the point? vulnerability, by proxy. i trust you not to hurt me as far as i can reach into the mirror.

It's not about how long you've known someone, but about who walked into your life, said 'I'm here for you,' and proved it."

Yours Astrum.

“I see the way you carry pain in your silence, and strength in your softness. You don’t need to be loud to be powerful. Your emotions are not ‘too much’ — they’re poetry in motion.” By----- Astrum