NÃO HÁ LUGAR COMO O LAR - PERCY/NICO AU COLEGIAL - CAPÍTULO XVIII

NÃO HÁ LUGAR COMO O LAR - PERCY/NICO AU COLEGIAL - CAPÍTULO XVIII

Oii, como vai? Então... eu não ia postar hoje, mas me deu uma vontade de escrever tão grande e eu simplesmente não conseguia parar, foi o que saiu. Também aproveitei para escrever um pouco sobre o Hades para não escrever coisa pior no futuro. Me desculpem se a escrita estiver muito apressada, é o que acontece quando escrevo muita coisa de uma vez.

Espero que vocês gostem^^

Capítulos anteriores: CAPÍTULO I / CAPÍTULO II / CAPÍTULO III / CAPÍTULO IV / CAPÍTULO V / CAPÍTULO VI / CAPÍTULO VII / CAPÍTULO VIII / CAPÍTULO IX / CAPÍTULO X / CAPÍTULO XI / CAPÍTULO XII / CAPÍTULO XIII / CAPÍTULO XIV / CAPÍTULO XV / CAPÍTULO XVI / CAPÍTULO XVII

Se Nico soubesse, ele nem teria levantado da cama naquela manhã. De fato, se tivesse o poder, teria voltado no tempo para o exato momento antes de brigar com Annabeth na festa e feito tudo diferente, continuaria a mentir para Percy, fingindo que estava tudo bem, mesmo que no fim do dia, era um problema a menos que ele teria que lidar. Sim, ele era o único culpado por tudo aquilo, por não contar o que acontecia com ele no momento certo e por não falar o suficiente no momento errado. No fim, Percy apenas estava fazendo o que ele tinha pedido, mas de um jeito que Nico não tinha previsto, tomando as rédeas da situação quando ele menos esperava. Um bom exemplo disso foi naquela manhã, uma segunda-feira como qualquer outra. Ou era o que ele pensava.

Nico não sabia como não tinha percebido essas coisas antes, o quanto a solidão tinha desaparecido com a presença de Percy e, em contrapartida, a reação que ele gerava nas pessoas. Nico tinha voltado há uma ou duas semanas, mas parecia que os cinco anos fora do país nunca tinham acontecido. As pessoas ainda olhavam para ele e o tratavam da mesma forma, o preconceito velado e mal escondido para quem quisesse ver. Era a cor de sua pele? A homofobia? Ou era o fato de Percy voltar a ignorar qualquer pessoa quando ele estava por perto? Era um peso que Nico não se lembrava de sentir antes. Não que ele pudesse evitar ou tivesse qualquer inclinação para fazê-lo, pois naquela manhã ele tinha acordado do jeito que sempre imaginou ser impossível, com beijos demorados e caricias que o faziam suspirar. Com abraços apertados que aqueciam sua alma e o fazia se sentir seguro. É claro que tudo isso entrou em pausa quando eles tiveram que sair da cama e ir para a escola e enfrentar o cruel mundo dos adolescentes. 

Ele mal percebeu o silêncio em volta deles até que Nico entrou com Percy na primeira aula do dia. Ele só entendeu o que acontecia quando viu Annabeth no fundo da sala, envolta de um grupo de pessoas. 

— Não liga para ela, sim? — Percy disse e levou a mão de Nico aos lábios. 

Então, tudo fez sentido. Eles estavam de mãos dadas, desfilando pela escola sem nenhuma preocupação. Nico apostava que Annabeth estava fazendo seu melhor para espalhar a nova fofoca; o jogador popular estava transando com o garoto recém-transferido, embora ele tivesse certeza que a maioria se lembrava dele.

Nico não teve muito mais tempo para pensar sobre o que as pessoas falavam dele. Percy o puxou para o outro lado da sala e se sentou com ele em uma das carteiras do canto, perfeitamente longe e protegido dos olhares curiosos. Ele queria poder dizer que não tinha conseguido se concentrar na aula, quando, na verdade, foi o contrário; os sussurros se tornaram som de fundo e quando ele menos viu, mais um dia escolar se encerrava, Nico se vendo na reflexão da janela do carro, observando a avenida cheia de árvores e lojas, o comércio agitado naquela hora do dia.

— Tudo bem? — Percy perguntou a seu lado, colocando uma das mãos sobre sua perna enquanto dirigia em direção à casa deles, quer dizer, em direção à casa dos Jackson.

— Acho que sim. A gente pode passar na minha casa? Eu queria pegar minhas malas.

— O que foi? Minhas roupas não são suficientes? 

Percy estava brincando, é claro. Ele não poderia continuar usando as camisas que ficavam escorregando de seus ombros ou suas antigas roupas, mesmo que elas estivessem muito bem conservadas.

— Per.

— Tudo bem. Eu faço tudo pelo meu bebê. — Percy mostrou a ele um enorme sorriso, como se ele tivesse contado a melhor piada do mundo e Nico decidiu ignorar. 

Cada vez que ele dizia não ser um bebê, alguma coisa acontecia mostrando o tanto que Percy estava certo. Ficando calado, Nico colocou suas mãos por cima da mão de Percy e as segurou, entrelaçando seus dedos.

— Estamos quase lá. Você quer que eu pegue ou você pega?

Era uma boa pergunta. Nico não queria encontrar Hades dentro da casa, porém fazia dias que não conversava com Bianca.

— Você entra comigo?

— É claro. Tudo o que você precisar.

Então, depois de alguns minutos, Percy estacionou o caro em frente a casa e ambos pararam na porta, o porteiro dando passagem para ele assim que o reconheceu. Nico nem tentou cumprimentar o homem, tudo o que ele queria era pegar suas coisas o mais rápido possível e falar com Bianca se ela estivesse em casa. Imagina sua surpresa ao ver o pai na sala de estar, sentando no sofá enquanto lia o jornal e tomava uma xícara de café.

— Nico, que surpresa. Pensei que você tinha esquecido onde é sua casa.

— Engraçado. — Nico rebateu. Ele nem se deu o trabalho de ver a reação do pai, e olhando para a frente, continuou seu caminho escadas acima. — Eu pensei que eu não tinha um pai.

— Garoto! Volte aqui! Nesse instante!

Claro, como se ele fosse obedecer um completo estranho. Nico continuou a andar calmamente, e mesmo ouvindo Percy trocar algumas palavras com Hades, isso não o abalou, era algo comum entre eles. Logo Percy estava a seu lado novamente, lhe oferecendo um sorriso e um ombro amigo. Sinceramente? Nico não se importava. Cada vez se importava menos. Ele já tinha uma família, e não era um homem irresponsável que o faria se sentir culpado por ignorar alguém que devia ser o primeiro a apoiá-lo. 

Sem fazer muita bagunça, Nico pegou suas malas, seus objetos pessoais e algumas caixas que haviam chegado somente agora da Itália, e deu uma volta no quarto, se certificando que tinha pegado tudo.

— É só isso? — Percy perguntou para ele, parecendo triste.

— O resto está em Verona. Eu não sabia quando tempo iria ficar por aqui.

— O que isso quer dizer?

Nico deu de ombros e verificou debaixo da cama.

— Pensei que você estaria namorando alguém. Se preparando casar, sabe? Pensei que eu voltaria para terminar o colégio e me desculpar. E depois… acho que voltar para a Itália para ajudar minha nona.

— Serio? Eu significo tão pouco? — Percy parecia magoado, mas essa não era a questão.

— Eu não esperava tudo isso.

Nico decidiu encarar Percy quando o silêncio se alongou mais do que o normal.

— Sempre esqueço o que eu fiz com você.

Não, Nico se negava a entrar nessa discussão mais uma vez. Ele se negava.

— Quer dizer… — Nico disse, tentando mudar de assunto. — Você sabia onde eu estava.

— Eu sabia. — Percy concordou. — Eu planejava ir atrás de você. Depois de me formar.

— Hm. — Nico murmurou sem saber o que dizer. Isso era algo bom, certo?

— Eu queria dar tempo para você… viver.

— Acho que não entendi.

— Não queria que você vivesse se perguntando o que poderia ter acontecido sem a minha sombra te rondando. Sei que isso é mais forte do que nós dois.

Quando Percy falava desse jeito, parecia que eles não tinham opção, como se fosse algo sem livre arbítrio. Talvez fosse. Porque se Percy tivesse aparecido em sua porta, ele teria largado tudo e teria dito sim para qualquer coisa que Percy sugerisse.

— Desculpa, eu não queria falar sobre isso de novo. Vamos, sim? — Percy disse e beijou seu rosto, tentando sorrir, antes de pegar as malas e uma das caixas, deixando para ele carregar os itens mais leves. 

Eles desceram as escadas e lá estava Hades bloqueando a passagem. Felizmente, Bianca também estava lá, ela pegou algumas coisas de sua mão e tentou sorrir para ele, exatamente como Percy tinha feito, tentando o consolar.

— Nico, precisamos conversar. — Hades disse, ainda bloqueando a porta de saída.

— Agora você quer conversar? O que você teria para me dizer?

— Precisamos conversar sobre o seu futuro.

— Futuro? Desde que seja longe de você, eu aceito.

— Eu sou seu pai. Você me deve respeito!

— Que respeito?

— Nico, por favor. — Bianca se meteu no meio deles e implorando com o olhar, continuou a falar: — Você poderia ouvir o que ele tem a dizer?

— Eu sinto muito. — Ele disse, não se sentindo nenhum pouco culpado. — Eu não quero saber dos planos dele para mim. É sua responsabilidade agora.

 — Sei que a gente errou com você e--

— Errou? — Nico balançou a cabeça, se negando a acreditar. — Eu te amo, Bia. De verdade. Mas não tenho nada a ver com a família Di Angelo. Ele é seu pai muito mais do que meu. Aproveite.

— Niccolas. Me obedeça nesse instante! — A voz de Hades retumbou pelo ambiente, profunda e rouca, feito um trovão. Talvez isso tivesse o aterrorizado alguns anos atrás, agora tudo o que ele sentia era uma profunda raiva.

— O que você vai fazer? Me bater? Esse não é seu jeito preferido de lidar com garotos desobedientes?

A cena a seguir se tornou um belo espetáculo aos olhos de Nico. Bianca ficou pálida feito uma folha em branco, Hades se enfureceu mais ainda, porém a reação mais interessante foi ver Percy congelar como a mais perfeita estatua grega. Seria essa mais uma camada de culpa para Percy “tentar não conversar com ele”?

— Está tudo bem. Vai em frente. — Nico disse quando ninguém mais se atreveu a dar um pio. — Vê se deixa pelo menos uma marca, assim fica mais fácil para entregar como prova para as autoridades. O que você acha disso?

— Você não teria coragem.

— Não? Então, tenta a sorte. — E ainda assim, quando Hades não se moveu para longe da porta, Nico foi forçado a continuar: — Você vai me forçar ou vai sair da frente?

— Seu--

— Nico, deixa comigo. Eu vou cuidar disso. — Percy disse a seu lado, o fazendo lembrar o que namorado ainda estava ali. Era estranho. Geralmente essas coisas aconteciam quando não havia testemunhas.

Era isso!

— Não precisa. Sei que Hades vai tomar a decisão certa, não vai? Principalmente com duas testemunhas presentes?

Nico, então, se virou para Hades e esperou. Hades podia ser irresponsável e violento, mas ele não era burro. 

Ainda fumegando de raiva, Hades saiu de frente da porta, mas não sem antes dizer:

— O que você vai fazer? Viver o resto da vida com o dinheiro dos outros? Mendigando por atenção?

— O que eu faço ou deixo de fazer não é da sua conta. Logo você não terá qualquer poder sobre mim ou sobre o que pertence a minha mãe. Diga adeus a sua fortuna, querido papai.

Assim, Nico deu as costas para Hades e saiu porta afora para nunca mais voltar. Ele faria Hades pagar por tudo o que ele fez e o faria devolver cada centavo que tinha sido tirado de sua mãe.

***

Nico se sentia sortudo. De verdade.

Eles colocaram suas coisas dentro do carro há tempo de Bianca dizer que iria telefonar para ele e Percy arrancar com o carro para longe daquela casa. Agora, por que ele se sentia sortudo? Bem, ele tinha sorte de Percy esperar até que eles chegassem em casa para abraçá-lo e tentar consolá-lo. O engraçado é que ele não precisa ser confortado. Dessa vez, tudo o que ele queria era bater em alguma vez para ver se assim a tensão saia de seus ombros. O que ele fez? Se deixou ser confortado mesmo assim. Deixou que Percy o abraçasse bem forte, que acariciasse seus cabelos daquela forma que fazia seus pelos se arrepiarem e deixou que Percy o beijasse longamente.

— Eu não sabia. Eu nunca-- por que você não me disse?

— Eu sabia que você faria alguma coisa idiota.

— Ele te batia! E eu… eu fiz o mesmo!

— Eu não diria isso. Hades nunca foi tão talentoso para me fez gozar.

— Nico!

— Desculpa! — Ele acabou rindo, sentindo parte da tensão deixar seu corpo. — Eu não queria ser mandado para longe por causa dele.

— Eu sinto muito. Você teve que passar por isso também e eu nunca desconfiei. Tudo faz sentido agora. Você não gostava de ir para a sua casa ou evitava Hades a todo custo.

— Eu não queria te preocupar.

— Não diga isso. Hades nunca mais te ver. Isso é uma promessa.

— O que você vai fazer?

— Você confia em mim?

Como ele não poderia quando Percy olhava para ele tão serio e com aqueles olhos verdes intensos?

— Eu confio. Você sabe disso.

— Vou tomar conta de você. E dessa vez, vou me certificar que essas pessoas paguem pelo o que elas fizeram.

E de novo, Nico pensou em contestar. Mas se Percy queria? Quem era ele para negar? Ele sabia que não devia gostar tanto de ser colocado num pedestal ou de ser protegido como se fosse de cristal. O problema real era que ele gostava, amava ver o senso de posse que emanava de Percy. Se quer era um problema quando ele permitia que acontecesse e até consentia com as ações de Percy? Então, cansado de hesitar, Nico apenas concordou, deixando que Percy continuasse com os beijos e abraços. A melhor parte foi quando Sally chegou do trabalho com Grover e Tyson. Ele se aninhou contra o peito de Percy e se permitiu apreciar o momento, vendo a reação da família Jackson. Bem, vendo a reação da sua família, porque eram eles quem haviam oferecido um lar para ele, os vendo ir de surpresos para furiosos em menos de dois minutos. Era algo que acalentava sua alma e afagava seu senso de vingança. Por que tentar lutar contra sua natureza quando ele podia ter tudo o que queria? No fim, Nico ouviu muitos “sinto muito” e “a gente vai cuidar de tudo”, finalizando com “você está seguro com a gente”.

Nico também sabia que eles não estavam dizendo aquilo apenas para confortá-lo, mas ver o rosto deles cheio de afeto e senso de justiça fazia algo dentro dele se acalmar, uma satisfação enorme borbulhando para fora dele em forma de um sorriso. Isso não devia ser muito comum, certo? Começar a rir quando eles mostravam tanta preocupação? A verdade é que Nico já se sentia vingado apenas pelo fato de alguém saber o tipo de pessoa que Hades Di Angelo realmente era.

— Obrigado. — Ele acabou dizendo quando a família o abraçou em conjunto, Sally quase chorando enquanto Grover e Tyson tinham uma expressão seria e neutra no rosto, o fazendo se lembrar quando Percy estava tentando se controlar para não destruir o que visse pelo caminho; Percy podia ser o integrante da família que mais mostrava suas emoções, mas por trás do rosto inocente e bondoso era Tyson quem agia primeiro.

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E então, o que vocês acharam? Está divertido escrever sobre o Nico e desvendar o se passa na cabeça dele. Eu só queria deixar claro que o Nico está onde está porque ele quer e não ser submisso demais. Eu não sei se essa semana ainda tem mais capítulos e não sei quando a tradução chega. Mas vocês sabem, quantos mais comentarios mais incentivo para eu escrever.

Obrigada pela presença!

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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME - PERCY/NICO AU HIGH SCHOOL - CHAPTER XXVI

Hi, how are you? I'm late, but I'm here. In this chapter we develop our protagonists' relationship a little more. I hope you enjoy it.

CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / CHAPTER III / CHAPTER IV / CHAPTER V / CHAPTER VI / CHAPTER VII / CHAPTER VIII / CHAPTER IX / CHAPTER X / CHAPTER XI / CHAPTER XII / CHAPTER XIII / CHAPTER XIV / CHAPTER XV / CHAPTER XVI / CHAPTER XVII / CHAPTER XVIII / CHAPTER XIX / CHAPTER XX / CHAPTER XXI / CHAPTER XXII / CHAPTER XXIII / CHAPTER XXIV / CHAPTER XXV

Nico snuggled deeper into Percy's arms, sighed, and feeling content, picked up the diary next to his pillow. The sun was still hiding in the sky and Nico already felt energized, the excess energy only encouraged that feeling of contentment to intensify. However, something held him in place, making him look out the window, allowing Nico to see the pool and the barbecue area. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that one day he would be so happy, feeling on top of the world.

Things weren't always easy, but Nico wouldn't trade Percy's presence for anything in the world.

He peeked out of the corner of his eye and saw that Percy was still asleep, sprawled out on the bed. Arms spread, belly up, with nothing to cover his body. Nico couldn't help but laugh, his chest growing warmer at the overwhelming thought. If Nico had known the power he had,that with a few words and a little courage, he could have all his  wishes granted, Nico would have done it years ago. Or maybe, he wouldn't. Maybe everything was happening at the right time and at the right moment.

The truth is, it took a long time for Nico to feel like himself, like he was someone worthy of having his own wants and desires, and not merely an object that other people could use.

He remembered very little of his childhood, most of his memories of his mother preserved in photographs, others, cooking or tending the garden with her, everything else lost in the long days before meeting Percy, leaving him with phantom feelings and impressions, hidden in a part of his mind that Nico could not access. However, if there was one thing that Nico still remembered, it was being a shy, lonely and traumatized boy; all he felt was fear and loneliness, alone in his crystal world, made of fictional superheroes and damsels in distress; his mother dead and abandoned by his father, a sister who, when she had time, paid attention to him, saying that his father was busy, but that she loved him. That was why, from an early age, Nico learned not to trust people. They approached him for a reason and they would always take something from him, even his sister, who at that time insisted on convincing him that staying there was better than returning to Italy and, in fact, it was Hades who asked her to keep Nico away from his real family, because, that way, the man would continue to have access to his mother's money as his legal guardian.

In the end, everyone was the same, everyone had the intention of taking advantage of him in one way or another. That is, until Percy showed up. First, Percy offered help. Then, a home, a family, company, affection. And instead of asking something from him, Percy offered and kept offering, leaving him confused for years. Even the money that Nico never had trouble getting, Percy made a point of offering. Or rather, sharing it with him. For many years Nico couldn't understand, how could someone give so much and not want anything in return?

Well, now Nico understood what Percy wanted from him. It just hadn't crossed his mind that Percy might be looking for a friend.

This was so sad and ironic that Nico wanted to cry, he wanted to go back in time and relive everything. Every moment and every laugh, every hug and innocent night shared. He wanted to go back and fix his mistakes before they even happened, he wished he had appreciated it more how things were and changed what happened in these last two years away from Percy, even though they had been essential for both of them.

No, it was better not to torture himself over something he couldn't fix. Nico wiped his face and opened the diary, flipping through the pages, realizing that only now that he had returned to Percy's side, the desire to draw and write had returned with him. It was strange, Nico might have even drawn when he was at his grandmother's house, something to keep himself busy, just to show that everything was okay and to reconnect with his grandfather and cousins. Even the small passages he wrote, those little scribbles, made in the hope that Percy would read them, were something he had lost the will to do during those years away from here.

In some ways, it was liberating. The freedom to do something because he wanted to and to know that Percy accepted him as he was, even if it was his deepest, most humiliating desires, and that Percy still chose to be with him was... it was the best feeling in the world.

Nico brought his hand to his throat, fingering the diamonds in his collar, and looked back at Percy, sleeping peacefully beside him, his chest rising and falling slowly, his long legs stretched out on the bed, a considerable bulge resting between them. Should Nico write something that... would continue to encourage Percy to feel as free as he did? Maybe Nico could reflect on last night?

Nico bit his lip and shrugged. That was why Percy had given him the diary, wasn't it?

“My safe word isn’t ‘no.’ Begging you to stop doesn’t mean I’m telling you to stop.

Tears, crying, and moaning are not a safe word. If I need to use it, I will. Until then, have fun.”

Nico stared at what he had written for a moment. He never imagined that someday he would be writing this kind of thing, but... it felt like something was missing. After all, Percy was giving him exactly what Nico had always wanted, so why not tell him everything he thought? Percy knew all his secrets, what was the harm in telling him all his thoughts too?

“Sometimes I’m not sure about anything. Other times, my whole being wants to be dominated and subjugated by you. Sometimes, I want you to force me, to hold me against the bed and give me no choice. Other times, I want you to just hold me and tell me everything is going to be okay. Can you decide these things for me? Can you give me pleasure and make me feel pain, just enough so that the memories of the past fade away?

I'm confused. Other people have hurt me and none of them have made me feel the way you do. Why is it different with you? Why do fear and uncertainty make me float with you?

So don't ask me what I want, just do it. I'll never blame you, you'll never disappoint me. Because I know that with you, I'm safe.”

Gods! He quickly closed the diary and brought it to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut. This wasn't exactly what Nico had in mind! What would Percy think of him? He hadn't meant to put all this weight on Percy's shoulders! He knew perfectly well that it wasn't right or fair to expect Percy to do... do this for him! Nico didn't even know what he was thinking anymore, he was just sure that he didn't want anything to change. Maybe if he hid the diary, Nico could avoid yet another forced therapy session.

Yes, that was what Nico was going to do it! He grabbed the diary and moved forward, wondering where he would hide it. Nico would have done it if Percy's hand hadn't moved to his waist, holding him tight and pulling him towards him. That made Nico stop, staying where he was, like a statue, now pressed against Percy's chest, the sleepy voice sounding near his ear.

"Where does my baby think he's going? Hmm?”

"Per! I... I..." Nico didn't know what to do. If he stuck his face under the pillow and never came out of there, would that be acceptable?  "I couldn't sleep.”

"Then, let Daddy rock you to sleep.”

Nico found it amazing how Percy could turn a simple sentence into a command. Or how he could sound so sexual without putting in any effort in it. Maybe it was all in his head, his anxiety making him see things that weren't even there.

“Baby,” Percy called in that velvety voice, and all his efforts to pretend nothing had happened went down the drain.

Nico turned in Percy's arms and faced him, feeling his body heat up as Percy got closer, now hugging him from behind and massaging his neck, running his hands through his hair. It was these moments that made him realize that he would do whatever Percy told him to do.

"Where did that little head of yours go, hm?”

When Nico continued to stare at him, Percy continued, a playful smile appearing on his lips.

"How about you let go of the diary?”

"Oh.”

Nico hadn't even realized what he was doing, he was hugging the diary to his chest, keeping Percy away from him.

Slowly, Percy raised his hand and took the diary from Nico's hands, staring at the cover of the notebook for a few seconds.

"What are you up to? If I open this, will I find a surprise?”

"What? No! Of course... no." Nico felt his face heat up and tried to think of a better excuse. If he acted quickly, he could still get out of this situation unharmed.

Unfortunately, Nico was too slow. Still smiling, Percy opened the diary, finding the last written page, marked by the pen.

Nico didn't want to look, he didn't! He buried his face in Percy's neck and hoped for the best.

"Hm. Now, now. Safe words? And.." Then, Percy stopped talking in the next moment, tensing up.

However, it seemed that Percy was willing to keep the truce between them. He merely moved and pulled Nico closer, making him sit on his lap. Percy grabbed Nico by the neck, making Nico face him, and kissed his lips, a soft and unhurried touch.

"I love you too. No matter what happens.”

Nico could only nod in agreement, watching Percy's green eyes shine in the dim light of the room.

"I always forget how strong you are. How much you've lived." Percy slid his fingers down the back of Nico's neck and began to stroke his hair there, looking at him seriously. "I promise I won't ask anymore, I won't doubt your decisions.”

"You don't have to do these things for me. It's very selfish.”

"I want to do it. I like it. I feel guilty for liking it so much." Percy seemed to think for a few moments and then spoke again, his voice softening, but his gaze burning Nico completely. “If I could, I would put you on a leash and not take my eyes off you. I would control all your thoughts and desires, your pleasure and your pain, your orgasms.”

"And why don't you do it?" Nico found himself saying, diving into the fantasy.

Well, maybe it wasn't a fantasy. Maybe Nico would be willing to do that and more if Percy made that decision for them.

"It's not right. I wouldn't be any different from Hades." However, Percy seemed to be really thinking about it, stroking Nico's hair as if he were a docile pet. "We can start slowly.”

Nico thought he had moaned, feeling a tremor run through his body, as if Percy was doing much more than just touch his hair and talk to him.

"What do you think about this? Want to try it?”

Nico nodded again, forgetting about the diary, the old memories, and the thin walls.

"How?”

"Hmmm." Percy stared at him for a few more moments, making his anxiety reach new peaks of adrenaline. Nico didn't need to worry because Percy soon had mercy on him. "Take the box I showed you yesterday. It's on the floor near the wardrobe.”

With shaky legs, Nico obeyed. He got out of bed, his legs feeling weak and almost tripped in the dark room, spotting the box in a corner near the wall. Nico picked it up and brought it close to Percy who opened it, revealing the items inside.

"W... what is this?”

The question was rhetorical, of course.

It wasn’t that Nico didn’t know what those things were. What was important to note was the intention behind the gesture. A muzzle, a blindfold, soft handcuffs, and a large, thickly textured pink collar. Something Nico had seen a few months ago, but never thought he would get to wear it. The collar was so big and looked so heavy…

“What do you think?” Percy asked again, watching him closely.

"I don't know." Nico whispered, distracted by the thought of what it all meant.

"Go ahead, choose one of them.”

Nico couldn't help but grab the pink collar and gasp. Maybe he was in shock, maybe it was the surprise. The leather strap was heavier than he thought, soft to the touch, but simple and beautiful. It almost felt like he was being proposed to for the third time. Like, this time it seemed to be something decisive, didn't it? A physical proof that was impossible not to notice, since the collar was bigger than his head.

“Did you like it?”

Nico finally looked at Percy, immediately regretting it. Percy wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary. He was, in fact, standing still, with his back against the bed frame, Percy was not even touching him. Was it all in his head? Has Percy always looked at him that way? Or was it something new, something hidden? Nico wasn't sure, but if he could bet, it seemed like Percy wanted to do something really bad to him, something that Nico would willingly let him do, and that probably neither of them would feel any remorse for.

“Oh.” Nico gasped, his reaction coming too late, realizing that maybe what Percy had said about… about putting him on a leash wasn’t just to make Nico feel good. 

For a moment Nico felt the need to run away, like last time, feeling like a prey, like he was going to be devoured if he wasn’t careful. This was what he wanted, wasn’t it? For Percy to dominate him completely? For him to not hold back? He just hadn’t expected… this. All of this. He hadn’t expected to feel so desired.

Percy shifted, leaning toward him, and Nico let it happen, realizing what he felt was far from fear. He let Percy take the collar from his hands and place the heavy leather around his neck, above his choker, buckling the bolt tight enough for the collar to stay in place.

Nico gasped and put his hands to his throat, holding onto the collar and Percy's hands, who was still holding him by the neck. Nico couldn't help but notice, Percy had that intense and strange expression on his face, his fingers around his neck, enjoying the texture of the leather against his warm skin, caressing where his neck met the collar. Nico didn't understand, he thought he was going to pass out, no matter how much air he got into his lungs or if the collar wasn't so tight. His hands were shaking, his eyes were watering, his head was spinning. His body was throbbing.

“Baby,” Percy finally said, breaking some of the tension. His voice was playful, laughing at his face, but low and husky, mocking him and comforting him in equal measures. “Breathe.”

Nico didn't like this. He thought it was wrong and that in the end, it was all just a fantasy. Now that he was faced with the reality, he didn't know if he could face it. Maybe... maybe he wasn't so submissive after all and just wanted to... feel protected?

"Shhhh, it's okay. I'm taking it off now. See? It's over.”

Percy raised his hand and showed that, indeed, the collar was now in his hands. So why did Nico still feel so... so ready to run away or have a panic attack, but so excited and anxious, that the feeling made him freeze like a small animal about to be slaughtered?

"It's okay if you're not ready, it's a big responsibility.”

"I hate you!" Nico screamed, frustration leaving his body with the high-pitched sound.

No, that wasn't true. He didn't hate Percy, but sometimes he hated what Percy made him feel. Or the problem was that he liked it more than he should.

"You hate me, do you?" Percy dropped the collar on a random corner of the bed and grabbed his hair, pulling it, making Nico moan. "I'm showing you what it means to be a submissive.”

"I... I didn't ask for this!”

“You think you can just get away with the easy parts and ignore the rest?” Percy didn’t raise his voice or even look angry, though his eyes were still bright and his expression was as serious as before, maybe even more intense. But there was something… something that burned inside him and sent shivers down his spine.

"I didn't mean to--"

"You never do.”

The truth was, Nico hadn't thought about it. Did he just want the easy part? It had to be true. It wasn't the first time he'd tried to run away. Maybe that was the solution.

"Hmmm… I have to consent, right? So, I... allow you... to…”

"What are you trying to say, Nico?”

"I consent to you forcing me when I don't want to... I allow you to stop me from running away, if I try to.”

"Gods, Nico!" Now Percy looked like the same boy he knew, his face contorted between a grimace of pain and a maniacal smile. "What do I do with you?”

"Don't leave me.”

“Gods!” Percy practically growled, catching him off guard in a tight hug, pressing their shoulders and abdomen together. “Let’s forget about this. Neither of us are ready for that step.”

"Liar " Now that Nico saw it, it was so obvious. Percy had always been ready, he was just the one who was still too innocent to realize what was happening before it was too late.

“Okay,” Percy agreed. “How about we save the collar for... special occasions?”

"Like what?”

"When you're excited, there's no one around and... you want something more intense.”

"Like last night?”

“Of course,” Percy said. So why did Nico think that wasn’t the case?

So, what do you think? Comments are always welcome.

See you soon!


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7 months ago
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?
Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes Asked: Timothée Chalamet Or Tom Holland?

Make Me Choose Challenge └ @milevenhearteyes asked: Timothée Chalamet or Tom Holland?

“The most important thing, in anything you do, is always trying your hardest, because even if you try your hardest and it’s not as good as you’d hoped, you still have that sense of not letting yourself down.”

1 year ago

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME - PERCY/NICO AU HIGH SCHOOL - CHAPTER XVI

Hi, how are you? I managed to translate the chapter just in time.

The chapter was going to come out earlier, but because of the holiday in Brazil I've allowed myself to rest. I've definitely given up on having a posting schedule, but I'll try to update every week. So, just come by once a week, on Friday, because if I post something it'll be ready on Friday. And, like, consider the texts here as initial drafts, okay? I'm still in my creative phase, and I love putting sub-plots and other things in the middle of the main plot. If I followed my original plan, I would have finished the story by now. So, let's relax and have fun. Thanks for being here!

Not too many warnings apart from mental health, I hope you like it.

CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / CHAPTER III / CHAPTER IV / CHAPTER V / CHAPTER VI / CHAPTER VII / CHAPTER VIII / CHAPTER IX / CHAPTER X / CHAPTER XI / CHAPTER XII / CHAPTER XIII / CHAPTER XIV / CHAPTER XV

Nico put the pen down on the last page he had written and rested the diary next to his pillow, stretching his arms and neck. He had written more than he had intended. Well, Percy was in for a bit of a surprise when he read it. But in the end, Percy was right, writing had taken the pressure off his shoulders that Nico hadn't even known was there to begin with. It was a magical moment, as he put his thoughts down on paper, his mind felt light and empty, as if he was telling what was bothering him to someone who wouldn't judge him and wouldn't try to give him 'advice' he hadn't asked for.

Tired of waiting, Nico lay down on the bed and put his head on the pillow. Why was Percy doing taking so long? The next thing he knew, he had closed his eyes, opening them again to feel something soft slide over his body. It was a damp, warm towel that Percy was holding. Nico blinked slowly and then Percy's figure came into view, wet hair and bare chest, wearing only a towel as he gently cleaned his body.

"Would you like a bath?" Percy murmured, moving closer to him, making him sit against the edge of the bed. "I filled the tub for you.”

"I could." He shrugged, it seemed like a good idea. Nico rarely saw any reason to use the bathtub.

So Percy took him by the hand and led him into the bathroom, asking: 

"How do you feel?”

He didn't know. A slight burning that pulsed inside him, maybe? Muscle and mental fatigue? A relaxation he had never felt before? It was all of this together and more. In general? Nico felt good, or as good as possible, similar to when he hadn't run away to Italy yet, maybe even better, now that he didn't need to hide his feelings.

"I'm fine." Nico shrugged again.

"Do you remember our rules?”

Unfortunately, Nico remembered. Percy must have been referring to always being honest.

"I don't know." Nico said, trying to be as honest as he could. "It's all too new for me to have an opinion.”

"Nico.” 

He stopped and faced Percy, who now had his arms crossed.

"You have to stop this. Don't tell me what I want to hear”.

"What do you want me to say?”

"What you're really feeling. Does something hurt? Do you need anything?”

"Why are you always questioning me?”

"Because you're always trying to please me.”

"What's wrong with that?”

He looked at Percy, but Percy looked at him like he was going to explode. None of that happened, though. Percy took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a moment and when he opened them again, an aura of calm was present. It was one of those moments where Nico knew he wasn't going to win, no matter what he did. So he let Percy lead him to the bathtub and lathered him up slowly and leisurely.

"You don't see the problem with that? Do you?" Percy asked distractedly, his hands sliding down between Nico's legs.

"Things have always been like this.”

"That's why I didn't go after you.”

"I don't think I understand.”

"I discovered that I... can't control myself around you. I made you act this way. I put you in this perfect, unbreakable little box. No one should live like that, according to someone else's wishes.”

"That's not true, I've always been like that.”

"Really? It took you five years to say all those things to me. If you didn't feel comfortable telling me how you felt before, what does that mean?”

Nico turned to face Percy, who had a distant look on his face, and realized that this bothered Percy more than he thought.

"I don't like fighting. I prefer things to stay that way.”

"Like what?”

"No conflict and no drama. I don't want to have to think about every step of the way. I just want to be with you and... satisfy you. Isn't that enough?”

"I can't do that." Then Percy grabbed his face and slid his fingers to the back of his neck, massaging it slowly and making him relax even more. "How can I be sure I'm not hurting you or stopping you from doing other things?”

"That's the point, isn't it? You feel guilty about wanting the same things I do.”

"Nico, don't torture me.”

"I'm not." He didn't think he was. "When I don't want... this thing we have, you'll know. 

"How?”

"I'll run away. Not like today. But, like, as if my life depended on it.

"Nico!”

"You know, when people try to get close to me, I usually feel suffocated. But when it's you, I just feel free and safe, even if I'm scared.”

Nico thought he was losing his mind, looking like a lunatic on the edge of a cliff. But it was the pure truth, what he looked for in all those faces, wasn't the beauty or the deep green eyes, no, it was always that feeling of security and stability, the comfort that Percy's arms always gave him. For those things were hard to emulate; if only he could have found this somewhere else, Nico wouldn't have felt so controlled and conditioned to do those things that Percy criticized so much, even though Percy had never asked for them. In the end, he understood what Percy was trying to imply; things would only get worse from now on, and they would probably continue this game of cat and mouse for a long time until he gave in. What could Nico do if Percy was the only one who made him feel this way, so free and trapped at the same time?

"Nico." Now Percy's voice sounded all hoarse and firm.

Opps. He looked down and saw that his hand was in Percy's lap, on top of the towel, but in a very strategic place.

"Why can't you tell me what's bothering you?”

He denied it, not ready to say what he really thought to Percy. Although he knew Percy felt something similar or worse. Nico had seen how much Percy had tried to get over him with other people, before and after he went to Italy. So, deep down, arguing was pointless. They needed a consensus.

"This will lead to nothing. I suggest a truce." Nico said, instead of explaining himself.

"Truce? This is not a war.”

"So why all we do is fight and have sex? I'd much rather just have sex.”

This brought a little smile to the corner of Percy's lips.

"What do you suggest?”

"l will... trust you and do whatever you ask if you stop questioning me.”

Now, Percy just looked sad.

"I don't want you to feel bad and cornered. I just worry. I want you to be the best possible version of yourself.”

"What if I just want to be the Nico who wants to be with Percy and not have to argue?”

"That's fine. We can do it your way. You have to promise me that if it's not working, you'll tell me.”

"I promise.”

All Nico could do was hope for the best and try to keep his end of the bargain.

***

When they woke up again, the sun was high in the sky, the morning already giving way to afternoon at a milder temperature. They were still in bed, his head on Percy's shoulder and Percy's arms around his waist. Finally, the silence was lasting more than five minutes. They didn't need to do anything or be anywhere other than there, where they had chosen to be.

"Hungry?" Nico heard Percy say quietly, his voice hoarse with sleep.

"No.”

"Not at all? Sally will come here soon, to see if we're still alive.”

That would be funny. Nico could even imagine Sally opening the door and catching them in bed like that, naked and hugging. It would be great. 

With this thought haunting him, Nico disentangled himself from Percy and sat down on the bed, feeling slightly dizzy but content, stretching until he fell backwards, closing his eyes. Maybe he needed something to eat. When was the last time? Had he even eaten anything at the party or just drunk?

"Tired?”

Nico sighed and gave in, knowing that his peace was about to end. He lay on his side of the bed and stared at Percy, who didn't look happy at all.

"Not much.”

"You know, I think we should create a system.”

"I think--”

"Every time you lie to me you will be punished.”

"You said you wouldn't doubt me!”

"It's not a doubt when I know the truth, when I see you lying to me.”

"What do you want me to do?”

"Tell the truth or say nothing at all.”

"Oh.”

"Are you going to spend the rest of your life keeping quiet to please me?”

That was a good question. It was hard to go back into the darkness when you could see so much light.

"This isn't funny." He muttered, feeling something inside his chest spread.

"Yeah. Imagine how I feel watching you lower yourself, being less than you could be.”

"I don't do it all the time.”

"No?”

"Only with you.”

Then Nico saw Percy reach out and touch his face in a light caress.

"I hate what I did to you, what your father did.” 

"You didn't do anything." His father, on the other hand, was a different story.

"I molded you into this perfect person who is afraid of offending anyone.” 

"That's not true! I…”

"I want you to scream if you want. I want you to hit me, to curse me if you feel like it. To revolt. Demand it. I never want to see you so hurt again.”

Maybe Percy was right. But did he really have to do these things? Wasn't something he could see himself doing.

"Don't get me wrong. You don't have to. But if you want to, or one day do these things, it's okay and completely normal”.

"Normal? How can doing these things be normal?”

"Gods." Percy hugged him tighter and leaned his head on Nico’s shoulder. "You don't have to be perfect. Do you understand that?”

But if he's not perfect, no one will like him. How could Nico not be what he already was?

"It's all right." Percy said, but Nico had the impression that Percy was saying this to himself.

In the end, Nico chose to keep quiet. What he had to say wouldn't make any difference, and maybe Percy was right. If he had nothing good to say, he'd better keep his mouth shut.

***

"Gods, what has Percy done to you?!”

As soon as they got downstairs, Sally greeted them with a loving smile and tight hugs. That is, that's what happened until Sally saw the bruise on Nico's neck; a bruise that was actually a well-placed hickey. 

"Mom, you're exaggerating.”

Nico, poor thing, looked between them, trying to understand what was going on. And Percy, like a good Samaritan, helped him to understand it. As if on cue, Percy put his hand on Nico's neck and Nico moaned. Whether it was pain, surprise or pleasure, was hard to tell. Whatever it was, it made his heart race and something else wake.

"Oh." Nico then said, bringing his hand up to his neck. "I didn't realize. It’s very ugly?”

"I wouldn't say that.”

He heard laughter behind him, but preferred to concentrate on Nico, who was frowning sweetly and taking his cell phone out of his pocket, looking at himself in the reflection of the screen.

"Percy! What were you trying to do? Tear off a piece?”

"You are not the only one." Percy opened the first two buttons of his shirt and showed his set of marks, small nails and the shape of teeth that went down until they disappeared inside his shirt.

"I... I didn't do this! Did I?”

"And much more.” 

Percy couldn't help himself, he laughed and pulled Nico into a hug, kissing his cheek. But everything seemed to be fine, because as soon as Percy hugged him, Nico melted against his shoulder, hugging him back.

"It's all right. You can bite me all you want, I like it. "And the way things were going, Nico liked it too.

Percy heard a snort and turned to look at Sally, who didn’t seem all that happy about the display of... affection.”

"Percy Jackson! That's not how you treat people.”

"It was something mutual. And if you must know, Nico started it. You can ask Annabeth, she was the first to see. See here? It was the first." And, right at the nape of his neck, where his hair was starting to grow long, there was a mark that was beginning to fade.

Nico hid his face in his shoulder and Sally crossed her arms. And before another wave of complaints arrived, Percy hurried over:

"Permission to maim?" Nico nodded yes, too embarrassed to face the room full of witnesses, which didn't stop the cursing, laughter and protests.

"That's enough." Sally raised one of her hands to her face and turned to Nico, making him raise his face. "Are you all right, darling? How was the party? Better than old times, no?”

Immediately, Percy knew something was wrong. Suddenly, Nico opened his mouth, about to say something and then closed it, cowering against his arms. The worst part was seeing Nico raise his head and look at him, as if waiting for Percy's permission for something, keeping his lips sealed tightly. He heard another gasp and realized that everyone was waiting for Nico to answer. Grover, Tyson and Sally all found Nico's behavior strange.

All that was left for Percy to do was smile and lead Nico into the living room to sit with him on the sofa.

"What's going on, hm?”

But all Nico did was deny it and look down at his lap, refusing to face him. 

"Please.”

This made Nico look between his eyelashes at him and take a deep breath: "I thought about what you said last night.” 

"About not lying?”

"About keeping quiet.”

Something in Percy's chest tightened at that moment, and hoping it wasn't what he thought, he asked: "Why would you keep quiet?”

"You said that if I was going to lie, I should keep quiet, and since I have nothing important to say, I'll do as you say.”

Percy thought he had stopped breathing. 

He wasn't serious! Who would follow such a ridiculous order? He just wanted to make Nico respond in any way other than accepting everything without protest, he wanted to make him react and see what was going on. And instead, Nico decided to go along with it in the worst possible way?

"Baby, please. I was wrong. I just wanted you to react.”

"React how?”

"In any way you want." Percy then smiled, trying to encourage Nico. "Come on, you can shout at me. You can swear at me. I've done something very bad. I deserve punishment.”

"Punishment?" Nico tilted his head like a confused puppy and moved closer. He kissed him on the lips in a sweet, gentle kiss and touched his hair, smiling angelically. "That's it. Your punishment.”

Percy wanted to cry. Why did everything he said seem to come out backwards? Or maybe it was Nico doing the best he could.

"Are you punishing me or  comforting me?”

"If I choose the punishment, you have to accept it.”

Percy let himself go and hugged Nico tightly, hearing him sigh with pleasure.

"I don't deserve you. I just wanted you to feel free to express yourself. You've been kept quiet for so long that I'm afraid the same thing will happen now.”

"I know." Nico murmured softly, looking pleased.

"What you have to say is important, always will be.” 

"I thought that if I kept quiet I wouldn't have to measure my words.” 

"Don't make me cry.”

"You're so silly. "Nico finally said, the only sincere thing in all that. "I made that decision. I had all the freedom in the world, but at the end of the day, I still missed you and the way things were.” 

In the end, life was about decisions and consequences. He continued to hug Percy and understood, Percy was as lost as he was in all this confusion, he understood that it was a period of adaptation and soon everything would return to normal. Now, what that normal was, they both had no idea, since they had never had a common friendship. 

"I'm sorry." Nico said again. "I think it's a period of adjustment. I'll try not to take everything you say so seriously.”

"I'm very happy about that." The truth was that Percy was relieved, thanking all the gods and deities for finding someone so understanding, although he would have liked Nico to be more combative. 

Don't get him wrong, Nico was one of the most independent and responsible people he had ever met, but what Nico had in the way of independence, he also had in the way of emotional dependence. And sometimes that emotional dependence was too heavy for him to carry alone, although he was willing to carry it for the rest of his life if it guaranteed that Nico would stay in his life.

"So, are we okay?" Nico asked, raising his head and peeking at him shyly.

"Of course, baby. As long as you are.”

Nico seemed immediately reassured. And if that’s what Nico wanted, Percy would do his best to sort things out. Obviously, asking hadn't worked it, nor had talking or pressuring. The way would be to do things the traditional way. Not that he knew what he was doing in the past, but if it’d worked before, it would work now.

Smiling, like nothing had happened, he guided Nico back to the kitchen and sat down next to him at the table, discovering too late that everyone had overheard his conversation with Nico. What could he do? Nico's well-being was more important than the disapproving looks. He knew he would soon see the reprimand, and if making a mistake was necessary to put right what he had done, then so be it! Percy would never regret putting Nico first.

"Pancakes or eggs?”

"Pancakes." Nico answered him. So pancakes it was. 

This was nothing new. Nico's favorite foods were sweet, and the savory ones had a nostalgic feeling, from the time when Nico's mother was still alive. So, next to the pancakes and the chocolate topping, Percy placed a cheese croissant in Nico’s plate, along with a glass of juice and a cup of coffee.

It was incredible. It seemed as if nothing bad had happened ten minutes ago. Nico took the first gulp from his coffee cup and smiled like it was the happiest day of his life, diving into his sugary pancakes next. And just like that, as if by magic, the atmosphere was friendly again, Nico chatting animatedly with Sally, while he, Grover and Tyson watched, trembling for the next feast they would be forced to attend.

"Dude, thanks for letting me stay. My mom's back.”

"You can stay as long as you like, it's your house. Why don't you pack a bag and stay until graduation? It won't be long now.

"If a whole year isn't too much..." Both he and Grover shrugged and Grover punched his shoulder amiably, making them both smile. It was a good idea, especially when he and Nico left; his mother would be alone and Grover would always be a great company.

"Really! What are you still doing in that house?”

"Yeah! There'll always be a room for you." Tyson finally deigned to join in the conversation, usually preferring to stay away from the drama. "You already work for us, what does it takes to be part of the family?”

"Do you think working is smiling at customers and taking them to the right table when others can't?”

"Of course it is. You even wear a nice suit and comb your hair with gel." Tyson continued, all too happy to mock Grover, back to their natural routine.

"Shut up! That's not even a uniform. Juniper likes it..." Grover's last words sounded very low, as if he was embarrassed.

And well, who was Percy to interrupt such a sweet and happy moment?

He turned to his food and took the first bite of his eggs, soft and lightly salted, just the way he liked them, and took a sip of his strong coffee without sugar or milk, noticing that Nico had already finished eating and was looking at him with a little smile on his face.

"What is it, hm? Do you want more?”

"No. I like to see you happy and having fun with your friends. You didn't used to do that.”

"It's true. I told you I had problems, didn't I?”

"I didn’t take it seriously. You always seem so determined and confident.”

"That doesn't mean I was right.”

"Hm." Nico murmured, thoughtfully. "I never thought about it from that angle. I think everyone has something to hide. Some people just hide it better.”

"That's just it. The more things we hide, the better actors we are, no?" Percy couldn't help himself, Nico was being so sincere that he deserved a reward. He pulled Nico by the scruff of his neck and kissed him right there in front of everyone, a kiss meant for four walls.

"What was that?" Nico said as soon as he caught his breath.

"A reward for an obedient baby.”

Blushing from head to toe, Nico just looked at him, giving him a cute little peck, but not complaining. What could he do? If that was how Nico understood it, then that was how it would be from now on.

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So? I have the impression that Nico is becoming so dramatic… or is it Percy's view of him? Well, I think Nico thinks Percy is a bit dramatic too 🤣🤣🤣🤣 What's your opinion? Your comments help me to understand the weak points in the story so that I can rewrite it in the best way in the future.

Thanks for reading!


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1 year ago

Human: Deal.

Fey: Very well. When you return home tonight, your mother will be in pristine health again. It will be like she never fell ill at all. Even the memory of her suffering will fade…

Human: Thank you so much. She means everything to me.

Fey: I know, I know. Let’s hope the price wasn’t too much for you after all… Only time will tell.

Human: So, when do we start?

Fey: …If I may ask you to elaborate?

Human: You said you wanted my firstborn.

Fey: Yes? And you agreed?

Human: Yeah, so, when do we start?

Fey:

Fey, blushing: Ah.


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1 year ago

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME - PERCY/NICO AU HIGH SCHOOL - CHAPTER II

Hey, how's everyone doing? I wasn't going to post it so soon, but since I had some time over the weekend, here it is. I'm sorry if there are any mistakes.

Good reading!

Previous chapters: CHAPTER I

“How did you like the first lesson?” Percy had to ask, only to see the expression of annoyance cross Nico's face, something cute between a grimace and a purse of lips. He knew what the answer would be, but nothing could compare to seeing it all in person. No one could blame him if Nico had become a lot more expressive in recent years, as if the boy had given himself the right to feel and express himself however he wanted, without any kind of fear or hesitation.

"It was normal. I think. I'm a little behind, but nothing some reading can't fix." Nico shrugged and continued walking beside him, running his hands through his own hair and throwing it back, preventing it from falling into his eyes; long hair that seemed to shine in the sun, long and black, but not like he would in the past, it was a more expansive and relaxed gesture that Percy couldn't say how he could differentiate. In the end, Grover had to be right. He was obsessed. He always were.

"Hungry?”

"Not much.”

But even so, they walked through the cafeteria side by side, walking between the tables and benches until they reached the cafeteria counter Percy couldn't help but notice, it felt like they were being paraded, if only by the way people were looking at them; whether they were looks of admiration, envy or disgust, it was hard to tell them apart, he was too busy staring at the profile of Nico's face, especially when Nico brought his fingers to his mouth and bit them lightly, looking indecisive.

“What are you going to order?” Nico asked, finally looking up at him.

“A juice is fine. How about sharing a pie?” He knew that the one with vegetables and cheese was Nico's favorite.

And just to prove his point, Nico smiled and waved, ordering a milkshake for himself.

It was all so familiar that Percy felt his heart sink. Why did that hurt so much? Shouldn't he be happy to have his best friend back? Well, Nico seemed to be very happy with his milkshake and half of the vegetable pie now that they had found an unoccupied place to sit, a faint flush of happiness spread over his dark face, intensifying with every moment he continued to watch Nico eat.

"Aren't you going to eat? It's just as good as I remembered.”

“Nico.” Percy complained, frustrated.

"What is it?”

"Could you eat with less pleasure?"

Certain things never changed. Nico looked at him with his mouth around the straw and smiled, sucking the ice cream heartily. Percy just shook his head and looked away, taking the first bite. And Nico was right, the pie still tasted the same, the dough smooth and soft, the cheese melting in your mouth and the gratin crunchy on top. Since Nico had been gone, he hadn't had the heart to eat that pie, it brought back memories he preferred to leave behind.

“Per-cy.” Nico called out to him, practically humming, smiling, resting his head in his hands and blinking slowly at him, his bright black eyes distracting him for a moment.

“Hm?”

"Shouldn't you eat with your friends?"

"Why?”

“They're looking at us.”

Maybe it was true.

Percy shifted his gaze towards them quickly and returned his focus to Nico. They weren't important, even if he felt trouble looming for the simple reason that Annabeth was among them. Annabeth, Thalia, Luke, Grover, Chris and Clarice. All of his and Nico's old friends. And okay, maybe it wasn't right to keep Nico all to himself when he wasn't the only one who missed him.

"Do you want to talk to them?"

“Nah. Later. What I want to know is, who are you seeing?”

"What? I’m not--"

“Annabeth or Luke?”

"I’d never!” When Nico scowled unimpressed, Percy confessed, “Okay! We had a thing, but it's a thing of the past. I'm free as a bird.”

"Are you sure?”

"I promise.”

“Why don’t I believe you?” Then, Nico leaned back against the back of the bench and crossed his arms. "I'm not going to get a little surprise from your ex-boyfriends, am I?"

“Why would that happen?”

"The way things are looking…”

Percy couldn't pretend any longer, he smiled at Nico and leaned towards the boy, holding his hands and brought them to his own lips, kissing them for a long time: "I promise nothing will happen. I'm not that kind of man.”

“Hmm, I know. Am I supposed to know anything else?”

“I only have eyes for you, darling.”

That made the flush on Nico's cheeks come back in full force. Maybe it was because he was still holding Nico's hands or maybe it was because they were sitting side by side in the middle of all those people.

After that neither of them spoke again and no one approached them, which didn't affect them at all. They continued to eat and hold each other's hands until the bell rang, and they had to split up; Nico would go to history class and Percy to advanced math, and Percy like the perfect knight that he was, led Nico into the correct classroom, for a moment thinking about acting like the cliché Nico had accused him of being and kiss him right there where anyone could see. In the end, he decided to give him a long, tight hug before letting Nico into the classroom. The good news was that they would have their last class together, advanced physics.

***

Percy had barely set foot inside the room when a barrage of voices surrounded him. It seemed that everyone had something to say about the newly transferred Italian boy, as apparently, he was the only one who knew about Nico's return.

"I told you!" One of them said.

"Who would say.” Another commented with far less enthusiasm.

And Percy? Well, he didn't care what they had to say. He walked calmly to his desk, took his books out of his bag and looked straight ahead, like the model student he never was. What could Percy say? Daydreaming about Nico was far more pleasant than feeding more gossip.

"Dude! You can’t do this to me.” It was Grover, once again, who now sat beside him and put his hand on his shoulder, squeezing it and looking proud for some reason. It wasn't Grover's words that irritated him, it was his tone of voice; it was pure mockery. “You have to tell me everything.”

"And here I thought cheerleaders were gossips." Percy returned.

“Percy!”

“It’s alright.”

"It’s alright? Aren't you forgetting anything?”

"Like what?”

“Since when are you and Nico still speaking?”

“We always have been. Since the age of eleven.”

"But how! Was he not in Italy?”

"And?”

"Dude." This time who spoke was Luke who was nearby just listening. “I feel used.”

That was a joke! The boy with the biggest cheating record he had ever met, feeling used! And just because they had something quick during Nico's absence?

"I thought we had something special." But when Percy turned to Luke, his friend had a strange glint in his eyes and a smile like he was about to do something. "You know who wouldn't like to hear that?"

“Annabeth.” Grover completed for him, now much quieter so that only he and Luke could hear.

"What I have to do with it? She's not my girlfriend.”

"Are you sure about that? Annabeth doesn't seem to think the same.”

"That's her problem, not mine."

“Dude, this is going to be a problem. Don't say I didn't warn you.” Luke said and touched his arm, pretending to be understanding.

"How about you mind your own business?"

"If I were you, I'd be careful. I remember how helpless little Nico used to be. And nobody wants that to happen again.”

Percy looked closely at Luke, trying to decide if this was a threat or if it was a reminder of what Annabeth was capable of to get what she wanted. In the end, he decided it was just a warning, because in the past Luke had been one of the few people to defend Nico when he couldn't. He just hoped the past wouldn't repeat itself.

***

Nico felt he should’ve done the rational thing and left after the music club was over, like any normal person would do. But there he was, walking through the now empty halls with his guitar and backpack in hand, heading towards the uncovered court that was further down the far end of the school's grounds. Wasn't he the perfect cliché? The new kid going to meet the cute and popular boy after school just because that same cute boy asked him to. Now it was too late. He’d already crossed the entire school and was sitting in the stands, putting the guitar into his lap while he strummed some loose notes. He was an idiot, he had avoided this kind of gesture for so long only to fall into his own trap without even realizing it.

What could he do but let things roll and see where they went? He shrugged and took a pen and notebook out of his bag, jotting down notes and possible melodies. It didn't take long, soon he heard the noise of a ball hitting the ground and footsteps running close to where he was sitting. He looked up and there was Percy, bouncing the ball down and looking up at him, his smile almost reaching his ears, as if the most wonderful thing was happening just because Nico was there. That was why he couldn't say no to Percy, how could he when someone smiled at him like that?

“Nico.” Percy said, as if tasting the name on his lips like the tastiest candy. "Another ten minutes? It’ll be fast.”

Nico shrugged and tried not to meet Percy's eyes, knowing his face had to be hotter than a pepper, preferring instead to enjoy his bare, defined shoulders and arms.

“Okay, I'm not in a hurry.”

"I can see.”

In the end, Nico had to finally face Percy. There was something in his voice that made Nico want to pay closer attention.

“What?”

“Are you writing a song?”

"I think so.” Without realizing it, he had even written a few words to accompany the melody.

"It’s about me?”

"Could be.”

How sincere of him. This could only be a habit, it was so normal for Nico to say whatever came to mind without needing to police himself around Percy that these truths would come out without permission.

"Beautiful.” Now Nico was confused. What was beautiful? The music or… something else?

Percy smiled once more and the doubt was soon gone. He wondered since when Percy's smiles expressed so many things and how each of them was so clear to him, like a perfect, complete, error free language.

"So, after school?”

“I know a place you'll love.”

"Do you know me that well?" Another smile and a nod, as if Percy were saying, ‘Of course, silly.’

He rolled his eyes and turned his attention to his guitar.

"Don't you have practice?"

“Nothing is more important than you.

Nico would have liked to say that they were friendly words and that Percy was joking, but he had spoken with such resolution and confidence that Nico believed him. You know, Percy was a great communicator, sometimes the smiles would dessapear, as if Percy wanted there to be no misunderstandings. It was in those moments that Nico liked to pretend that he hadn't heard a thing, that he hadn't understood, or that nothing had happened. It’s easier when these things happened over connections where thousands of kilometers separated them, but here, less than five meters away? It made his heart race and his palms sweat.

"Hurry up.” He muttered back, trying to ignore Percy's words. "It's getting late.”

"Wait for me.”

So Nico waited, listening to Percy's footsteps retreat down the court.

What else could he do? Besides waiting and behaving, waiting for the moment when Percy would have some time to spare to him? Nico continued strumming the strings of his guitar and didn’t raise his head again for long minutes, that is, until someone sat down next to him, remaining silent until he gave up and stared at them. It was Annabeth, of course, with her intense blue-gray eyes and long golden hair, slender and tall, looking down on him just as he remembered, making him feel like he was a bug she wouldn't kill out of pity.

“Nico, is nice to see you again. How is Bianca doing?”

"Good.” Was all he said. Maybe she still intimidated him, maybe she still had the power to make him cry like a helpless baby.

"What brings you here?”

And again, he felt like the same lonely, outcast kid, the helpless boy anyone could use and abuse. Nico was so tired of it. He wouldn't give that power to Annabeth or that kind of person who, when they didn't have something the want, they took it by force.

"It's none of your business. Is that envy? Did it hurt a lot when he dumped you?”

Annabeth merely smiled, studying him, pretending she was on top when they both knew that was far from the truth.

“Ah, looks like some things have changed, then.”

"Looks liked it.”

"You know you're not going to win, don't you?"

“This isn't a game.”

“Look, I wasn't very nice to you. That’s why I’ll give you a chance. If you walk away, I promise I won't stand in your way. Things are like that…”

How kind of her, isn't it? Did she know what happened all those years he was abroad? How had Percy been the first to get back in touch less than a week after he’d left for Italy? And that in the end, there was nothing to be gained or lost? It’s for that exact reason that Nico chose to remain silent, watching Annabeth toss her platinum hair back as she kept talking.

“…you'll do very well around here if you do as I say.”

"Anne?" Someone behind them called out to her. It was Silena and Grover, they were both dressed in cheerleading clothes. Grover  was wearing lycra pants and Silena, a skirt, mini-blouse and pompoms in her hand. “Drew is calling for you.”

“She always is.” Was Annabeth's turn to roll her eyes and get up. “I think that's it. Do us both a favor, will you? It’ll be better this way.”

Tha way, tucking in her skirt and climbing the steps to the bleachers, he, Grover, and Silena watched Annabeth strut away, taking with her the tension Nico hadn't even realized had built up. Well, now he remembered one of the main reasons he had gone so far away from there.

“We are very sorry.” Grover was the first to break the silence, taking a seat next to him.

“She doesn't do it on purpose.” Silena sat down on the other. “It's not personal.”

“Never is with her.” Nico muttered back.

He didn't even know why he tried. Now, looking at things closely… maybe he should have stayed in Italy. The situation there was chaotic, but at least it was manageable. Having to go back and face the same traumatic things might not have been the best of his ideas.

“Don't mind her.” Grover said once more as the three of them watched the basketball team practice just as Percy made a basket and looked towards him, smiling victoriously.

Maybe, in the end, all this drama would be worth it if the reward was the smile lighting up Percy Jackson's face.

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Tell me what you think! And thanks for reading.

Also, a forgot to warn you, this will be a +18, ok?

Thanks again^^


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10 months ago

“omg you’re so creative. how do you get your ideas” i hallucinate a single scene in the taco bell drive thru and then spend 13 months trying to write it

2 years ago

Writer’s Guide to Unreliable Narrators

Writer’s Guide To Unreliable Narrators

Unreliable narrators are narrators who intentionally or subconsciously mislead the reader with their own bias and lies. I love nothing more than a narrator who deceives me. There is something incredibly charged about not being able to rely on your guide through a story. So how can we write them?

Determine What Kind of Unreliable Narrator your Narrator is.

Writer’s Guide To Unreliable Narrators

There are five kinds of unreliable narrator we see in fiction, each with their own way of leading the audience astray.

The Unstable: This narrator is usually an unstable character with problems with grasping reality or having trouble accepting it so they bend it to their own tastes. Example: Arthur Fleck in Joker & Amy Elliot Dunne in Gone Girl

The Exaggerator: the one who spins fanciful lies to embellish the facts of the story around them. Usually they embellish it in such a way to make themselves look good.

The Child: Though children can be a font of truth, they often have a way of muddling facts and being confused by certain aspects of the story they are not versed in. Example. Bran in A Song of Ice and Fire & Scout Finch in To Kill A Mockingbird

The Biased: The biased Narrator is usually an outsider. They enter the world with preconceptions of the world and/or characters around them. Usually they get disabused of their biases by story’s end but not always. Example Damen/Damianos of Akielos in The Captive Prince Trilogy

The Liar: The Liar is simply just a liar liar pants on fire. They twist the narrative and outwardly lie about their actions and the reactions of others. The liar is self-serving, usually narcissistic. Example Cersei Lannister from A Song of Ice and Fire.

How to Write Your Unreliable Narrator

Writer’s Guide To Unreliable Narrators

The thing you must remember is that your audience immediately trusts your narrator, they have no other choice. It is a given. However, it is your job to break that trust.

Allow the narrator to outwardly lie. Let them spout half truths or full out lies in the narrative. The audience will take what your character says as the gosphel until slapped with a conflicting account or detail. It provides a wham to the story that becomes a turning point. Perhaps the best example of this is Amy Elliott Dunne in Gone Girl (I recommend). She introduces herself as a sweet housewife who loves her husband despite her fears over his temper. However, in the section of the book she narrates she quickly flips Nick’s account of the events leading up to her disappearance, turning the audience on their head so fast none of us have a chance.

Allow the character to mislead your audience with the absence of details. Your story is one big chain, omit a link and the thing is useless & subject to the questioning you want to draw out of the audience. For example, Daenerys Targaryen believes wholeheartedly that the house with the red door is in Braavos. However, she vividly remembers a lemon tree outside her window and sunsine. But lemon trees cannot grow Braavos and it is notoriously damp and cold. #lemongate

Speak to your audience through the events of the story, bypassing the narrator to get through to the audience. Sometimes the best reveal that the narrator cannot be trusted is showing the audience evidence that they are either not seeing what’s happening or they are ignoring it. For example in Captive Prince, it is almost explicitly suggested that the Regent molested his nephew Laurent as a child. If one ignores Damen’s narration, the signs are there to see from Laurent’s reaction to his Uncle’s presence and in some of Laurent’s words. Damen chalks this down to Laurent being a brat and the Regent just being a villain. He has to be told despite the audience realising or at least suspecting it from the second book onward.

Play off your secondary characters. Use the characters around your narrator to disprove their account if the story and completely flip the story on its head. Usually, I trust the secondary characters when it comes to Unreliable Narrators. For example, Cersei Lannister gets her own POV in a Feast of Crows. Up until this point she has been very mercurial in her reactions in the first few books, to the point where other characters and the audience are confused about who the real Cersei is: the shrewd polictian or the wine mom with way too much faith in herself and her spawn. In truth, Cersei is incredibly paranoid about those around her and she thinks herself the cleverest player in the game. However, from others such as Tyrion, Tywin, Littlefinger and the members of the Small Council (who yes, all have a touch of misgyny to their criticisms of Cersei but really most of their points have a point since she is mad as a box of frogs) we see that Cersei tends to make enemies out of allies, assume the worst in others and make political choices to spite others or to put her faith in those who offer her little more than flattery.


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5 months ago

SITTER'S LOVE - Nico!Babysitter, Percy!Teacher-father - Chapter VIII e Chapter IX

Hi, how are you? Yes, I'm back. I know you're getting tired of me, but as I had a few chapters ready I decided to share them with you in advance. We'll probably have new chapters on Wednesday, because I'm trying to finish the new chapter of “There's nothing like home” (although it's going to take me a while to post it here, I still need to finish writing and revising it), but it'll come.

Anyway, I hope you will enjoy today's chapter. And if you can give feedback on the story, I'd love to hear from you, really, without judgment. This story isn't complete yet, so any suggestions or notes would be very beneficial.

Previous chapters: CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / / CHAPTER III, CHAPTER IV e CHAPTER V / Chapter VI e Chapter VII

Chapter VIII

Nico opened his eyes and sat up on the blankets, realizing that he wasn't in his single bed. There were no windows facing a huge tree, his computer wasn't in the corner of the room, and there weren't any loud voices reverberating through the house early in the morning. No, no way, that wasn't his room. Well, this one, painted in soft shades of gray and with a double-sized bed, wasn't his, and much less this calm that made him feel so peaceful and calm.

He… what had he done…? It was so confusing…

Oh! Now he remembered. Percy and his soft voice. A bowl of soup and another question that finally made sense. Yes, last night he had waited for Percy and fallen asleep without wanting to, even though Nico had sworn he would wait for the children to fall asleep so he could leave. Instead, he had a serious conversation with the man who didn't seem to take anything seriously, but who in fact hid his seriousness behind very well-disguised smiles.

Like, he knew that now. However, that hadn't been the case the day before when he'd followed Percy up the stairs and into the empty guest room. He barely remembered getting into the shower, that had been another thing he hadn't expected of himself. He felt like he should have done more than nod and obey. 

In the end, Nico couldn't help it, Percy had spoken to him so gently and affectionately that Nico found himself nodding. Vaguely, he remembered taking off his clothes once inside the suite Percy had shown him to, stepping into the bathroom and a while later hearing two soft knocks on the door. After that, Nico didn't know how the rest of the night had gone. He knew that at some point Percy had... gods! Was that right? He'd shown up naked and wet in front of his boss? While the man was handing him clean clothes? Nico couldn't even remember their reactions. It was all so hazy it was like Nico had been drinking himself into a stupor.

Thinking about it, it was better that he didn't remember any of it. Nico wasn't sure if it had really happened or if it had been a dream, especially the part where Percy looked at him from head to toe like he was going to attack at any moment, but since he didn't feel anything unusual, no pain or marks, then... then if he ignored what might or might not have happened, it was as if nothing had happened, right? So, wearing the same clothes he had slept in, he walked down the hallway and down the stairs, going straight to the kitchen where he found something strange and sweetly domestic; Percy Jackson wore a red apron and dark colored sweatpants as he walked barefoot across the cold kitchen floor,  plating four dishes. Bacon, eggs, and sausages. There was coffee and juice on the table. Jam, bread, croissants, and cake. A small improvised feast.

"I thought you didn't know how to cook.”

Nico didn't know why he had said that. Maybe it was because it all seemed like a dream, where he had a happy family that welcomed him on a nice, sunny Saturday morning and a... husband...? Wow... Nico was starting to think his fantasies were a little rushed. Or maybe his brain wasn't ready to wake up so early on a Saturday, much less was it prepared for this happy scene. Usually his family didn't eat together; his father was the first to wake up, getting up early, and his mother prepared the food. As people woke up, each one served themselves and went about their day without talking to anyone else. So, this... this wasn't at all what he expected.

"That's nothing! Everyone knows how to make an egg." Percy said excitedly, almost humming as he finished putting the sausages on everyone's plates. "Come on, sit with us.”

“I shouldn’t,” he muttered. Nico really shouldn’t. Percy made him feel like he was part of the family, and that was dangerous. Most of the time, Nico barely felt like he was part of his own family.

"Come on, I insist." Percy looked at him with that bright smile and he felt uncomfortable, for some reason it made a lump appear in his throat.

Nico lowered his head and thought about running upstairs, still remembering the night before, when he heard a chair scrape across the kitchen floor and a small hand touch his. To his surprise, he found Alice smiling as much or more than Percy himself, gently pulling him by the hand, guiding him to the chair next to where Percy sat. She didn't say anything else, just went back to her own place and continued eating calmly, the two children and the adult man acting like this was something normal to them.

"Did I miss something?" Nico muttered once more. He picked up the cup of coffee that was in front of his plate and almost groaned, now ready to wake up. It was the best coffee he had ever tasted.

"Dad's postdoc was accepted! And Mom is coming home today. We have to celebrate!”

"Yes, yes! Mom promised we would go out today! Everyone together!" Logan finished for his sister, almost jumping in the high chair.

Nico smiled at them, still with the cup against his lips, and looked at Percy, tempted to ask what had happened last night, noticing how his smile had diminished a fraction. The children might not have noticed, but he had seen several of his smiles and could see it clearly. Which was pretty crazy, he had known him for less than forty hours and already knew what those smiles meant? Nico must have been very tired, delirious, due to this mountain of emotions that this strangely affectionate and at the same time, fragmented family, made him feel. Yeah, it must have all been his imagination.

“That's very good." He said after a while, when he realized they were waiting for an answer. "I'll finally be able to meet her.”

"That you will." It was Percy's turn to mutter darkly.

“Should I worry?" He said it unintentionally, just as a joke, and of course, even the children understood it because they let out little giggles between bites of scrambled eggs.

"You're damn right." Nico heard that and turned to Percy trying to figure out if he was serious. And when he found out that was the case, well… Percy distracted him as always. His clear eyes, his mouth curved in a smile and his handsome face made him forget what he had asked.

The good thing about all this is that Percy had shrugged, as if he didn't have any problems in the world, and said:

"Don't worry, dear. I'll protect you." Right after he winked at him.

And as always, even though he felt himself blushing, Nico pretended that nothing had happened. He drank the rest of the coffee in his cup while the children laughed happily. Now, whether they laughed with him or at him was another question.

Chapter IX

“No, seriously now,” Percy told him, his tone changing to something more neutral. “Annabeth can be a little demanding. Don’t take anything she says seriously, and don’t do anything she asks.”

"Um… okay? I guess?" He said, shrugging.

Nico had already realized how things worked around here. The children were happy with every bit of attention, Annabeth Chase was the absent wife and Percy was the provider of the house, something quite simple in his opinion. So, he didn't see any reason for so much drama.

He looked at the plate seeing that two pieces of toast had magically appeared on it and looked back at Percy.

"I guess I'll go then.”

“You usually eat more in the morning,” Percy said, ignoring him, and pushed the plate closer to Nico.

"Me? No, I don't.”

"But you could. And what are you running from? She doesn't bite. At most Annabeth might say a few not-so-kind words.”

“Really, I've been away from home for too long. I need to--”

“Nonsense.”

Percy didn't understand. He felt something strange... something that was going up his back and stopping halfway down his throat, something that hadn't happened in months. Nico needed to get up and move, needed to bring back any sense of normalcy he could find, because staying here, in that friendly and calm environment, was far from what Nico was used to. He had to--

Nico dragged his chair back, unable to hold it any longer, and Percy stood up with him, holding him loosely by the arm, nothing that really held him in place, but for some reason that gentle gesture made him gasp, made him even more anxious, impatient, as though his skin wanted to escape from his body along with his lungs. He tried to do what his psychiatrist suggested and stopped in the middle of the next movement, in the exact place where Percy was holding him, less than a step away from the chair where he had previously sat; did he want to escape? Yes, but curiosity won, keeping him trapped in that kitchen to find out what Percy's next motive would be.

Percy handed him the container with the food from the day before and Nico held it in his hands, feeling a little confused. That is, until he saw that on top of it there was a note and a hundred dollar bill. He turned the jar in his hand and read the message that said: “Thanks for the food” only to turn to Percy and for the first time look him straight in the eye, without hesitation. Percy made him feel guilty. Vulnerable. Important. It was like Nico was cheating on the boyfriend who should have been waiting for him all night. And he didn't even have the guts to tell him; he hadn't even remembered during all this time that Will could have been worried. His mother too. And his sisters?

"What is this?" Nico asked even though he didn't care, feeling a little out of it. Airy. Light.

"What do you think it is?”

"I can't accept it.”

“You will. I don’t accept refunds.” Percy smiled at him. Percy… Percy was actually smiling again. A smile so beautiful that this time Nico knew he was being teased or mocked. No, Percy Jackson was flirting with him.

"W-what?”

"You bought us food and then made more food. It's the least I can do to repay you.”

"Sir, I can't--”

Nico shook his head. It was all wrong. Everything!

“Actually, where did you buy that food? It must have been expensive.”

That was when Nico closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He counted to five very slowly and opened them again, just like the doctor had taught him. Maybe he shouldn't have stopped taking his medication. And as discreetly as he could, he moved his hands that were starting to shake and crossed them behind his back so they wouldn't notice. If he could just leave, maybe everything would be okay. Nico hated this. Why was he so nervous if Percy was just asking about the restaurant? It was no big deal. So what if the man wanted to give him money? These situations shouldn't do this to Nico. If he remembered that he was in control, everything would be okay. That's it. He was in control. He--

"Nico? Are you okay?" He felt Percy's hands on his shoulders and let out a breath, not even realizing he had stopped breathing.

"I'm sorry. I have to go.”

"You're not even going to tell me where you bought the food?”

"I… went… went to a restaurant… that sells homemade lunch boxes… in the city center.”

"Do you need a ride?”

He waved, accepting the ride, but didn't move; Nico wasn't even breathing, trying to act normal. He felt paralyzed, as if someone had chained him up and thrown him into the depths of the sea. He felt himself getting heavy and his vision was starting to get blurry, preventing him from seeing anything in front of him. He... he...

"Nico, pay attention to me. Can you hear me? Breathe with me.”

He took a deep breath and let it out, this time feeling the weight in his chest ease.

“Again.”

Nico took another deep breath and then his head fell forward, so light and empty that he found himself collapsing, feeling so good that the world finally made sense again. However, he didn't end up on the floor or face down on the table as he expected, no, now that things were back to normal he noticed that something firm and stable was holding him upright, giving him exactly what he needed. It was... it was Percy's chest breathing next to his, guiding his breathing, it was his head resting on the man's shoulder and it was the large hands that caressed his back over his shirt. Nico couldn't deny it, he felt warm once again, like a breath of air that brought heat, allowing his blood to warm up again and circulate through his body.

“Daddy, is he going to be okay?” Nico heard Logan ask, his childish voice sounding scared.

"Shhh… don’t worry.”

Now, who Percy was saying this to, he didn't know. The good news was that Nico didn't feel uncomfortable around them and that, in fact, their voices full of affection and care were like a balm to his lonely soul.

***

“Do you feel better?” Percy asked in a low, hoarse whisper.

They were still standing. Percy's arms were wrapped around his waist and Nico felt the world slowly spin as he leaned against his boss's broad shoulders, his head resting against his neck, and even from this awkward angle Nico could feel Percy's worry radiating around them.

Nico couldn't help but notice, Percy was looking at him very closely and touching his face so carefully, his features so worried, that Nico just let himself be carried away by the feeling that warmed his chest and allowed him to breathe a little easier. He watched as Percy kept trying to make him react, calling his name and touching his neck, keeping him safe in his arms. It was then that Percy finally made a decision, and only when Percy was sure that Nico wouldn't faint, he picked him up and didn't wait any longer; the man held his legs, lifting them off the floor and then supported his back so that he wouldn't slip away from his arms. 

In this way, they moved through the house, Nico seeing the white marble floor and the stairs behind him, and Percy going with him through a long hallway. They passed the windows that let the midday sun enter the hallway and then into the room that Percy was carrying him into.

The world spun for a moment, the sun softening as they entered the room, allowing Nico to close his eyes and the sway of Percy's footsteps to lull him gently. Then Percy lowered himself and sat with him on the bed, making him lean against a soft surface and sigh, feeling Percy support him against his broad chest.

“Hm,” Nico remembered muttering back. He always felt a little spacey and high the moment the seizures went away, but in the best way possible. He owed him an explanation, right? Yeah, he did.

"Do you need anything? Water? Pain medicine?”

Nico could barely hear Percy's voice, the low, whispered timbre always distracted him. Percy used such a soft, gentle tone that it seemed to caress his soul, so husky and velvety, so softly at the foot of his ear that if they weren't so close to each other, Nico wouldn't hear anything. And his eyes, they were so beautiful, all intense and fixed on him. Hmm... yes, Percy was still holding him and he had his arms around the man's neck. Should Nico do that? Hmm... he didn't know, he just understood that his chest was resting against his shoulder and that Percy's hands were holding his head, keeping him comfortable.

He blinked slowly and stared into Percy's now serious eyes. So steady. They gave him so much confidence that Nico knew he was safe. Ah, maybe he shouldn't be so comfortable, at times like these his body kind of... acted without his consent.

"I… I'm fine. I'm sorry. I… I have--

“You don’t need to explain yourself,” Percy told him, as serious as ever, looking uninterested. Or maybe Percy was just shocked. It was understandable.

“I do.” When Percy just nodded, he continued, “When I was eight, I had a panic attack and was diagnosed with GAD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I’m always anxious, but I can usually control it without it interfering with my work. It’s been years since that happened. I… I’m so sorry. Routine and feeling stable helps. I’m really sorry. I know I should have told you.”

"It's okay. It wasn't your fault.”

"No, it’s not that. I recently came off the meds. The doctor told me I would be able to control it. It’s just that…”

"What is it?" Percy told him softly.

“I've been more nervous than usual. It's just... well... the change in routine…”

He said it was a change of routine, but they both knew it was more than that.

“I see,” Percy said again. “I’m sorry if I caused this. It won’t happen again.”

It probably meant he wouldn't lose his job, right? Because Percy paid really well.

It was Nico's turn to nod. He looked down at Percy's hand that was now on his shoulder and the other one that was resting on his knee. For some reason, at that moment he didn't feel nervous. In fact, it was the complete opposite. Nico was numb, feeling so good that any guilt or discomfort about being in this situation had dissipated. Or maybe he trusted him, because Percy was showing him that this trust could be placed in him.

Nico continued to stare at Percy's hand and then a blond head entered his field of vision. It was Logan, he was crying, his big green eyes puffy while Alice just watched attentively and quietly, both trying to smile at him. Nico smiled back and then everything seemed to get lighter, almost making him close his eyes.

"Okay, you can rest now. Do you have your cell phone? I'll let your family know.”

“Oh,” he muttered. It was true. Nico hadn’t told them. Looking up and finding himself smiling at Percy, Nico thanked him. “It’s in my bag.”

Before Percy could say anything, Nico finally let his eyes close. He felt Percy tucking him back into the pillows and heard footsteps leaving the room, but it was okay; in less than a few seconds everything went black and sleep took him away.

Until next time!


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auroraescritora - Aurora Escritora
Aurora Escritora

Sejam bem-vindos! Olá, esse é meu blog pessoal. Escrevo fanfics Pernico/Nicercy e orginais, e reblogo alguns posts de vez em quando. História Atual Não há lugar como o Lar - versão em Portugues There's no Place like home - English version Resumo: Nico está voltando da Itália depois de passar dois anos por lá e encontra Percy, o melhor amigo que ele deixou para trás, mas que manteve contato nesse tempo afastado. O resto se desenvolve a partir desse reencontro. Se você quiser saber o que eu escrevo, siga a tag #my writing

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