Balletscary - Oli | 19

i can’t unclench my jaw

letter i gave to hayden when i saw ethel cain perform ♡︎ every day i wonder if she read it or not

@mothercain

forgotten part of town

can you feel it?

some recent shots ～(^з^)-♡

Do you mind if I ask how exactly do you make your music sound so haunting & beautifully obscure? What app(s) do you use for editing? And how did you learn to play the instruments so well?

Thank you so much ;-; ♡ i’ve been learning music production for over 2 years now, i’m mostly self taught!

I think it all comes from within, i tend to translate exactly how im feeling into sound. It’s all in the chords and what type of sounds you’re using (texture is a major part in creating a certain atmosphere too). You just need to find the scales and chords that feel right for what you’re trying to create, it’s super easy to learn if you’re passionate about it; it almost doesn’t feel like you’re learning. And also visual inspiration or just creating your own visuals can go a super super long way in helping you create a worth within your music.

I only really play the guitar and even then it doesn’t pop up in my music a lot, i use midi keyboard’s and such but most of the time im painting in the notes manually or starting with a triad and adding notes to build my own chords. As for apps and softwares, I use Ableton Live to make all of my music; Ableton’s interface is quite confusing when you’re first starting out but like anything you get accustomed to it and it becomes muscle memory.

My advice for anyone starting out in music production is; experiment and find your own sound. Don’t pin yourself down by replicating other artists sounds, as much as you may be inspired by them you will dig yourself into a hole by trying to sound like someone else. Play around and have fun because that’s what it’s all about!!!! thank you for the compliments btw. ꈍᴗꈍ

asphyxia is so erotic

the eroticism of brutalist architecture with ethel cain

through the pain, the agony

he would peel off my clothes

kissing every inch of my bare skin

biting the flesh, tenderising me

positioning himself on top

synchronicity, synergy

two bodies bathed and dancing in moonlight

the substance of his lust in words, he likes to whisper things

i am special

and presently, we are one

i feel a sudden surge of energy, it rushes up through my spine and into my skull

drawing my teeth to his neck

i desire quite violently

in my head i picture myself biting as hard as

i could

drowned in his ichor - we resume, despite the mess

his blood would cleanse me

like ocean water purified under the moon

tasting him worsened my ustulation

- otterley