Geta always has a plan. In fact, he usually has two, three, four plans in the back of his mind. His brain is never not working; he’s always watching, always anticipating his and everyone else’s next move. He’s got it all down, he knows every exit in every room in the palace, he always has his back to the wall, he wears his sturdiest rings just in case he has to lash out. He’s thin, lanky even, but he figures he’s been on the receiving end of enough punches from his father to know how to land one himself.
Every blink, every flick of a finger, every word that comes out just a little bit off, he notices it. He sees how people watch him, but he watches them right back, and he sees it all. Things maybe they don’t even realize they’re doing. But Geta sees it, analyzes it, his mind spinning with reasons for why. Why do the senators fiddle with their robes when he is speaking? Why does Lucilla pause slightly before she answers his questions? Why does Tegula’s lip twitch whenever Geta adjusts his laurels? He’s got a million answers for each question, and not one of those answers makes him feel any better.
Geta doesn’t sleep well. He never has. He has trouble falling asleep and then staying asleep. As an adult, he grinds his teeth so badly he’s had one removed at the back of his mouth. As a child, he’d stare at Caracalla, passed out and snoring, completely oblivious to the world around him. Geta envied him for it. He still does.
Caracalla. It’s not entirely Caracalla’s fault he’s ill, Geta knows that. Geta isn’t even sure Caracalla knows he’s ill most of the time. Geta pities him as much as he loves him. If he thinks about it too much, he feels his throat seizes up and he has to close his eyes. He hasn’t cried in a long time.
Geta layers on the cuffs, stacks his rings, slathers his face with make up. Geta does not always like being himself. The thicker the eye shadow, the more elaborate his robes, the more 'Emperor' he looks, the less he sees himself and the less others can see him too, he thinks. He hopes. He doesn’t always feel that way, not when he is standing in the middle of a room, playing his part, and then something or someone goes off script and he’s left naked and exposed, a fool.
When that happens, Geta broods. He paces, he fiddles with those same rings he layered on for protection. He replays the moments over and over and over and over and over in his head, he can’t stop himself. His stomach burns and he’s found himself on the ground a few times, curled up and sweating, blinking back hot tears and swallowing bile. He’s pulled out hair before, he’s made himself bleed with his own fingernails, and so now he cuts them short.
@official-graveyard-posts
do you think truckers realize that theyre dentists of highways
I am a victim of Illi McMillin propoganda
i love doing apologism for fictional characters. yes he killed people and ruined everything but thats ok bc i like him and hes my little baby. so who cares
ok but let's say they went to ollie's house and he wasn't lying
they turn up and it's some dilapidated shared housing complex or something. his mum is there, maybe a bit drunk. it's awkward. ollie clams up. he doesn't want to be there, he can't be there.
felix tries to make normal conversation, tries to lighten the mood and get them talking, but ollie just isn't having it. maybe his mum starts kicking off over god knows what so they leave quickly.
once they get back to saltburn it's a complete flip from the film. it's ollie walking away this time, felix begging for him to stop, saying sorry over and over. ollie loves him but right in this moment he needs a break. he needs to be alone for a while. he feels humiliated, like a child again.
the party. ollie has hidden himself away in a corner somewhere. maybe he's hiding out in the maze. maybe he's a little drunk when felix finds him (maybe he's a little drunk too).
they argue about it. ollie is still pissed, felix just wants them to be friends again. but ollie is drunk (he feels like his father) so he still grabs and pushes and says "i love you" when he knows he probably shouldn't. be he feels scared and vulnerable and like a joke.
idk idk i don't think they'd kiss but i think maybe they'd wake up in the morning, maybe curled up together in felix's bed. fully clothed, wings and antlers and all, all rumpled and warm.
maybe they talk quietly about it all, ollie's past, his trauma, his fears. neither of them mention the "i love you" but they're both thinking about it. felix is thinking about it.
about how he maybe sort of possibly loves him too. maybe more than he thought he did.
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 thinking thought.
Humans didn't make the big ben. Do you really think those dumbass Britains could make a clock that big? Those big gears are way too heavy, how'd they get those up there. No way. It was the beasts
Saltburn Dash Simulator!!!
note: ik tumblr existed at the time, however this is more similar to 2024 tumblr rather than 2007 tumblr
⚪️house-with-chintz-deactivated09122006
Hey guys, might be inactive for a bit. Got into uni and I'm celebrating with my parents!!! I'm so exited!!!
(4 notes)
#Oxford scholarship babeyyy
🔄 🪽thiswasamistake
🪽 thiswasamistake
I don't understand people who yearn over randos they met like, once. Couldn't be me.
🪽 thiswasamistake
Oh fuck.
#screaming #crying #the other one idk I never remember it.
(11,100 notes)
🔄 🐞bug-blog
🚲 to-keep-it-real
Just told my crush to clean his room AITA?
I 18 (M) told my 19 (M) crush to clean his room, and started picking stuff up. He kicked me out of his dorm lol. Also my parents abuse me and I hate dirt.
AITA?
🐞bug-blog
Hey Op what the actual fuck.
(200 notes)
♥️ ophelia-in-love
fellas is it wrong to crush on your brother's best friend?
(670 notes)
🔄 🚲to-keep-it-real
🏹 none-pizza
First anniversary of Neil banging out the tunes!!!!
(200,000 notes)
🔄 💘dump-him
💘 dump-him
I love this summer!!!
💘 dump-him
...
#I miss this.
(1 note)
🐮 bway-news
Mama Mia the musical (the film) is supposed to come out some time this year.
#musicals #movie musical #ABBA
(4,000 notes)
🔄 🚲to-keep-it-real
🍫 Queen-rocks
#felix please respond
(4 notes)
♥️ ophelia-in-love
hey guys I need party inspo help
(2,000 notes)
love the bene gesserit. they're out there girlboss gatekeep gaslighting for 90 generations, perfectly and meticulously masterminding every political player of the universe into sexy times to create the Ultimate Manwhore and after ALL OF THAT. ALLLL OF THAT?
Dune timeline hits. we're here! we've done it! Our two greatest prospects!! Kwisatz Haderach! At last! And it's just fucking Kinky and Twinky over here like oh ok nice going I guess
This post would end Oliver quick and I know it.
glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts