Love The Idea Of The Batfam All Being Equally Unhinged Like Tim Calls Dick Every Two Days With “why’d

hc that jason todd has an instagram/youtube/tiktok account called gatsbyreviews (named after jay gatsby) where he posts reviews of various fictional media (mostly books). thing is, he always gives the reviews in the tone of a pissed-off drill sergeant explaining something for the third time to a particularly bone-headed group of rookies. so even when the review is positive, he sounds like he's passionately defending it in court. he does all his videos in a hoodie and sunglasses, so his identity isn't clear (especially since any viewers who could have recognized him somehow would know he's, y'know, dead) but the visible scars on the lower half of his face are an endless source of intrigue to people in the comments. someone once asked how tall he was, and he responded with a video of him silently stacking up books until the pile matched his height, then standing next to the pile for several seconds before playing jenga with it and eventually knocking it over, as jenga usually ends up going. another youtuber uses the books to find jason's height (the guy in question is real, his name is shane fanx and he's known as the asian height guy) and when it's revealed that he's fucking 6'3 all his viewers start losing their minds. they talk more than ever about this massive, scarred man with the biteable thighs and passion for literature. he gains thousands of followers overnight, people are thirsting in his comments, and jason's just like "hey wtf have i gotten myself into"

on the bright side, he stops thinking he's the ugliest member of the family. after all, when hundreds or thousands of random people on the internet are thirsting over you without seeing your full face, it's hard to keep thinking you're hideous.

it's not glamorous, but it's also not honest work, and nobody needs to do it

idk why people photoshopped the crying cat meme on this pic when the unedited version is so powerful

Sure, you know how to self-flagellate, but do you know how to apologize? Saying "I'm a stupid idiot" is not the same thing as saying "I did something wrong."

batman has gotta be one of my favorite heroes only because he’ll go through the most borderline traumatic series of events possible where he may or may not have proved an afterlife existed just to drive away in his stupid fucking batcar with his stupid fucking bat ears peeking out

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When Wild was overwhelmed or scared during his first adventure, he always ended up playing with Wolfie

One day, Wild tapped Wolfie’s snoot and Twilight kinda jerked back, not expecting to be touched that close to his face while he was half asleep

The reaction made Wild laugh and he has a habit of doing it now

That habit expanded from just Wolfie

His first victim after Twi was Sidon. While he was thinking about trying it on Sidon, he kinda was just like 0_0 for a few minutes

Sidon asked what was up after the very uncomfortable silence between them, Wild told his giant ass to lean down, Sidon did and he got booped

Sidon had a more confused reaction, but laughed with Link. Sidon’s been booped before, it’s been 100 years, but he still remembers the feeling

Third victim was Tulin

This is pre-totk so he’s still just that little guy who flaps his little wings when his dad hits one target

Wild went over there to ask/tell Teba something and Tulin begged Wild to shoot, so he did. When he got back to Tulin, the little guy was elated definitely not because he didn’t accidentally forget to switch arrows and therefore wasted a bomb arrow Wild became very happy and was reminded of how much he loved kids and booped Tulin who got extra happy

Tulin is autistic guys😔

This habit is still very ongoing. He’s victimized Zelda too. It didn’t help when he was suddenly surrounded by more boopable victims

Especially with one with a very pointy nose…

He made Time his first victim in the Chain. He had a similar reaction that Wolfie did

Wild loves his nose and keeps booping it, Time has learned to except his fate and follows his nose tap with him ruffling Wild’s hair

Anyway, yeah, Wild likes booping noses

Please boop him back, he loves it

sometimes I wonder why y'all are obsessed with specific characters and I'm like "why them" but then I remember that sometimes its literally not your choice you just look at them wrong and all of a sudden they're taking up your every thought forever

Bee and Puppycat is like something out of a psychedelic Adventure Time Lofi fall beats stream with the most obscure random humor

I love it

"I wouldn't wish that upon my worst enemy" well I fucking would