"you Can't Pick And Choose What You Like From Canon" Common Misconception! Yes You Can

wish i could call in bitchy to work

and while i’m on a self indulgent thing? i think that any of the kids calling Bruce “dad” changes his whole demeanor. it helps him know that whatever they’re talking about is serious.

hearing his name shouted across the house does nothing for him. a hundred people say his name all day, including his kids. whatever the situation is can be fixed.

but hearing “Dad!”, cried out in battle or screamed from the other room, has him rushing to their side. what is it love and i’m here you’re alright and shh i’ve got you

“Bruce, I need help” = can’t open this large jar, have a question about math homework, need someone to look at this case file for me

“Dad, I need help” = I am hurt. I am scared. I am in danger. I need you to make things better. I need you to protect me.

Damian gets into trouble at school a lot and every time the principal calls up one of Damian’s family members to come in and deal with the latest issue Bruce has to scramble around whatever crime-problem they’re swamped with at the time to get either him or Dick or Alfred down to the school, but sometimes they just can’t and have to let the principal know that nobody can come, except the principal makes a big stink about SOMEBODY having to show up for this kid, and so to avoid looking neglectful Bruce reluctantly agrees and says somebody will be down there soon.

Damian’s principal watches as this 200+ pound brick shit-house of a guy casually wanders into the school with the most menacing glare on his face as he sips from a starbucks cup, slings his other hand into the pocket of his leather jacket, ignores her completely to turn to Damian and go ‘fuck’d you do now?’

‘fighting.’ Damian responds, looking slightly proud, sitting straight up in his seat. brick shit-house man sticks his bottom lip out and nods consideringly.

‘opponent get a hit on you?’

‘of course not. i used that move you showed me when i was four. executed it perfectly.’

brick shit-house man nods again in approval, sticking out his cup. ‘nice. you get the rest of my oreo frappe as a reward.’

Damian takes the drink and sips it delicately, preening under the guys praise. the kid Damian had been called in for fighting, of whom had been whining about how Damian should be suspended for his actions, had grown nervously silent at the sight of the frankly massively intimidating man, as had his equally vocal mother. brick shit-house man doesn’t grant them a glance, instead looking at the principal.

‘so can we go now? i was in the middle of an interrogation when Bruce called.’

hesitating slightly, the principal asks who this man is, in relation to her student.

‘none of your fucking business.’

ok then. after double checking that Damian was ok with leaving with the man, there wasn’t much she could do but say yes and hope her acquiescing would save her from the weight of his glare. as they leave, she hears Damian innocently ask if he could aid with the interrogation, being as he was now free for the afternoon.

‘are you kidding? Bruce would hate me if i let you near that shit.’ a beat. ‘so yeah but like don’t fuckin tell him.’

the next time Bruce Dick or Alfred can’t make it down to the school on short notice, the principal assures them they can reschedule.

Some of my trauma is literally over 18 years old like it’s legally an adult but it won’t move the fuck out of my head??? Get a job and pay some rent buddy.

we need more divorcebaiting. how strongly can canon imply (without technically outright stating) that these two characters are bitterly, acrimoniously divorced? essential we explore this

Fantasizing about extremely traumatic scenarios bc it doesn't feel like my trauma is enough

You don't understand there's a part of me that wants Alfred Pennyworth to never age but there's another part that's like

As Alfred grows older his body grows tired and everyone notices. And for Bruce that's his surrogate father. For everyone else that's Grandpa. Immediately there's a secret boot camp in the Batcave for everyone to start learning how to better care for themselves. Selina Kyle assisting of course.

There's already disability accommodations for Barbara so they just need to tweak and add some stuff. They've learned from her needs and start researching on how to care for the elderly for Alfred specifically.

On paper he's still a butler but really everyone (who lives or stays for a long time in Wayne manor) makes sure they learn how to do the hardwork for themselves. Most of his job is just to be there for them honestly. They insist on doing things for themselves.

But Alfred is Alfred. So he knows what's going on. And he's so deeply proud of them. He doesn't let him do anything he insists he can or wants do himself. He's still his own person after all, and they gradually learn his boundaries and patterns.

Bruce keeps paying him but not in a way you'd pay a butler usually. More in a way where you'd send money to your retired parents.

Do you see my vision?

you heathens will reblog day specific posts any day of the week. i woke up thinking it was wednesday

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

Even more amused that Merthur is trending outside of Merlin or BBC Merlin.

Keep it up, Fandom!

Now let me help keep it going by posting about it trending 😉