✨Ava✨

When I was a child, many of my sensory issues were used as the butt of jokes by my family. I had many phobias due to these issues, but they were laughed off as they were seen as "extreme" or over the top.

Examples would be I was terrified of pinecones as young as 3 because I thought they were visually disturbing and dangerous. So, at the age of 4/5, we were in a park and I handed my mum my jacket so I could use the public loo. She proceeded to fill the pockets, sleeves and hood with pinecones.

I had a meltdown in the middle of a forest. I screamed and collapsed and i was told I was overreacting.

Now, this isn't good behaviour for an adult for any child.

But when you're an undiagnosed autistic, you begin to learn that your sensory pain doesn't matter. It's too much, and needs to be ignored.

Holding the door closed whilst the toilet flushed, another sensory pain was one done to me "for laughs". I was told it wasn't that big of a deal and I needed to grow up.

So, is it any wonder that late diagnosed (and probably many early diagnosed) autistics ignore their own needs? We don't want to be too much. We don't want to rock the boat and endure being told that we're overreacting and to just shut up.

Moon Harps // Mini Arp on Etsy

genuinely i think the hardest thing ive ever had to learn in my life is that even the relationships (platonic, familial, etc) that you thought were strongest and relied most heavily on can disintegrate in the right circumstances like yes even the one you think that could never happen to. and that's something i learned when i was already YEARS deep in aro theory and activism bc it's just that ingrained that you Should have that permanent safety net and yeah maybe you should and it doesn't mean you shouldn't invest in people and relationships and it doesn't make transitory relationships less important it literally just is a fact that the Only specific person you can Always rely on is yourself and that's okay. alexa play no one is alone from into the woods.

*throws into the void* just spent the last 7 hours of my life on this, pls i can't look at it anymore

a frog comic -w-

Jller by Benjamin Maus and Prokop Bartonicek - a kinetic artwork that sorts thousands of random river stones by age

Like to charge reblog to cast

I want every mental health professional that has treated me through out my life to get into a roman amphitheatre with a weapon of their choosing and the winner will decide what disorders I have

rb and tell me what’s your most re watched movie.. and be honest