No One Is Asking "Why Would Bruce Wayne Be In A Lexcorp Meeting", But I Have The Answer

No one is asking "Why would Bruce Wayne be in a Lexcorp meeting", but I have the answer

Bruce has bought enough stocks of the Lexcorp to be there, and he did for 3 main reasons

He just wants to annoy Lex

He's trying to take from the inside/spy the Lexcorp

JL things like trying to stop Lex from doing bad things by annoying him and making his life difficult

the second one is problably for the most trying to make the Lexcorp a better corporation and trying to kick out Lex and then integrating the Lexcorp under the WE to make it an actual good company

And Tim is just there to have fun and keep Brucie Wayne farcade up, probably

Bruce and Tim: *sitting in a LexCorp meeting*

Lex: Alright everybody, thanks for jumping on this all hands.

Lex: *sees Tim*

Lex: Who is this?

Bruce: Oh, this is my corporate translator. He's here to translate all the corporate jargon into words that I can actually understand.

Lex: Uhh alright. I'm gonna have to align with HR to see if this is—

Bruce, to Tim: What's he saying?

Tim: He's saying he's upset by my presence.

Lex: I'm not upset, okay? I'm simply processing this information into a more digestible way.

Tim: Oh yeah, he's really upset.

Lex: Okay, let's just move forward with the meeting, shall we? So Q1 is in the books and we had a very strong showing. Now, there are certainly some gaps within our processes that we're working strategically in order to align that should help us bridge those gaps in a really efficient way.

Bruce: Translator?

Tim: Q1 wasn't good and management is very upset about it.

Lex: That's not what I said, okay? There are certainly some gaps, but management is working lockstep in order to come up with strategic processes in order to alleviate these areas of deficiency.

Tim: They're planning layoffs.

Lex: No. No. That— I'm not saying that, okay? We're just developing ways to become a much leaner organization.

Tim: It's gonna be twenty-five percent of the organization.

Lex: No!

More Posts from Carmelitacreep and Others

3 weeks ago

DC in omegaverse

Ok, so you know my Batman in omegaverse post (I'll link it just in case you wanna read it), where I talked about how Batman is an Alpha and Bruce Wayne is an omega, and then I reposted it with a continuation of my omegaverse headcanons of some of the batfam. Well I've been thinking for a while (especially because I've been reading a lot of omega!Bruce SuperBat fics), and I realized something, or well, I already knew but still... O/B/A thing is a species thing, so technically it should be a human thing, not a universe thing, differently from soulmates au (maybe I'll do a post about it one day) and in a lot of fics some of the aliens that live on Earth have a secondary gender of the omegaverse, but they technically talking they shouldn't so, here's my theory/headcanon.

Let's start with the character that started all of this

Clark Kent aka Superman, and just Kryptonians in general: Kryptonians seems to be the most human like between all the other aliens in DC, or at least this outside of the Yellow sun that basically gives them more power by some kind of photosyntesis, but outside of this they are basically the same as a human apparently, so they maybe developed a similiar A/B/O thing, but if we not consider this then they shouldn't have a secondary gender, super senses yes, like (under the yellow sun) they can smell the pheromones maybe distinguish them but probably don't really get affected by them, this depends then on how the pheromones works in the omegaverse au If we consider the first case in MY OPINION (so my headcanon) is that Superman is an alpha, a powerful alpha, but Clark Kent, is still an alpha, but more like a "weak alpha" in the sense that he tends to be more a beta than an alpha diffently from Superman.

Now to the martians: THEY DON'T HAVE A SECONDARY GENDER, that's it, they change shapes, they can mutate their forms, imitate other beings. I'm not even use they actually have a proper sex and/or gender, but to my knowlege they have, anyway if we consider the martians on Earth, when they are in their secret ID they imitate betas, this is the thing that would make more sense.

Now Koriand'r and Tamarian in general: they probably don't have secondary genders, to my understandings they are basically warriors so compared to humans A/B/O they are the most similiar to alphas but without the biology of one, so the ones on Earth, so Koriand'r, in their secret ID they pretend to be alphas.

That's it, if you want me to do an analysis on Amazons and Atlanteas, because technically talking they aren't exactly humans... just tell me and I will.


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1 month ago

I present to you, Revna my DnD caracther, because tomorrow (maybe) the campaign starts, so yeah, here to you this little inventor tabaxi, that act like the cat she is

I Present To You, Revna My DnD Caracther, Because Tomorrow (maybe) The Campaign Starts, So Yeah, Here

that is ispired (for her looks) by this art

Hoshizora
hosino-hikaru.tumblr.com

by Hoshizora, that I found on pinterest

and here the timelaps of like 3 weeks of drawing between breaks during uni classes

Anyway, I'll probably pubish it on ig too in my artaccount too but not on Twitter because of the AI problem, but idk if I should make an account on Bluesky to post it there...


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2 months ago

Rec time! What are your favorite fics that you've read and why? After replying to this ask, feel free pass on to five others to spread the love. 💗

Ok, wow, I didn't expect to do any fic rec, even because I don't have any bookmark on Ao3, but I'll try.

I searched in my History and my subscribtion.

PJO fics (Percy Jackson)

Any fic written by ottpop if you like Valgrace (Jason Grace x Leo Valdez) or Solangelo (Will Solace x Nico Di Angelo)

A Royal Odyssey by MAWo2 a modern royal AU Percabeth (Percy Jackson x Annabeth Chase) fic, unfortunatly not completed where Percy is a Royal and Annabeth is a normal american girl

All the Things We Never Said by Blossomdail a WIP, Percabeth and it's about the period between "The wrath of the triple goddess" and the first book of "Trials of Apollo" nad it explores the relationship between Percy and Annabeth (E rated)

Empire Now by WillowInTheWildwood it's a future fic with protagonist a daughter of Solangelo, it's a WIP but it's almost finished

Epic fic

Athena, daughter of Odysseus by Irunaki it's a WIP with slow updates and you can find the author on youtube (with their animations)

Batfam fics (it's a general it cointains Timkon, Superbat and others)

5 Times Bruce Was Proctective of His Pups (+ 2 Times They Were Protective of Him) by Thicc_Personality it's a Superbat (superman x Batman) WIP with really slow updates or discontinued, I'm unsure of this, and it's pretty funny with Conner being the clone of Clark and Bruce and not Lex and Clark, and Omega!Bruce

That Time the Hero Community Thought Robin Had a Crush on Batman by Raven_WitchTales it's WIP Batfam when Dick was Robin pre identity reveal, and it's Basically JL (Justice League) and Teen Titans being idiots.

Violent Sun (a krypton lives au) by Beabaseball (beabaseball), rattlemeoldbones Superbat WIP with slow updates crypton is not destroyed and Bruce and Kal are both kind of experiments (bruce is still a human, just on Krypton for govermant reasons).

Young Folks by palmanatomy WIP Timkon preidentity reveal and it kinda creates a lovesquare between the two and their identities

any of TaxiCabToSlowtown fics, if you want Funny Batfam and generally JL fics

Consanguineous Ministrations by Briarwitched it's kinda (but not really) a Superbat fic, it's a pretty long oneshot where an Kryptonian ship gives Bruce a "clone Baby" that is Kon

Crossovers fic

Nikólaos by KCBR crossover between Hp (Harry Potter) and PJO with Nico as a protaconist, it's a WIP with weekly updates and it follows Nico since he appeard in the books to idk, it's still a WIP

The Wrong Afterlife by The_Mountain_Flower if it can be consider crossover, it's the same universe... it's between PJO and Magnus Chase, it's a future fic where a greek demigod ends up in the norse afterlife (Vahalla)

Dark Matter by mysterycyclone completed fic with a newly starde sequel crossover between Spiderman and the DCU specifically Batman

For now I'm done, I can't come to mind/find others, should I start bookmarking the fics that I would reccomend?


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6 days ago

In honor ofthe second session of the campaign

In Honor Ofthe Second Session Of The Campaign

here I present a meme based on a scene that happend in session 1


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4 years ago
Here It Is A Simple Cosplay Prop Tutorial For A Simple Classic Bomb

Here it is a simple cosplay prop tutorial for a simple classic bomb

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This is my first post in english, and my first tutorial; I decided that I will (try to) post everything double and translated for the 2 language that I speak.


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2 months ago

Batman in omegaverse

Batman in an omegaverse always should be an alpha or at least someone without a smell , but not Bruce Wayne, he should be an omega, so hear me out:

Bruce Wayne by the public is considered to be a Homeboy (probably, idk the correct term, I'm italian), he's all smiley, a guy that continiusly adopts (apparently) random orphans, who is known for sleeping around a lot, at least befor Dick was adopted, the person that if you even go near his children will go crazy to protect them; kinda of boneless, who dosen't really works at his own company, basically Brucie Wayne (in the public eye, then in reality we all know the normal Bruce Wayne out of galas is not like that), an omega.

But Batman?

Batman is perceived as a menace for goons and villain, the darkness of Gotham, its protector, so an alpha, or at least what people think he is; probably he uses blocker so he smells like nothing or like an alpha.

and all of this makes even more sense because since the start bruce tried to separete the 2 personas (even in the canon) to protect his identity, so they're complete opposite, could ever Brucie Wayne be Batman? ptf NO, that's the point, so having a omega Brucie and an alpha Batman makes way more sense than having an alpha Bruce Wayne


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2 months ago

An headcanon that I have about the Batboys:

Jason and Dick have a thing for redheads, and this is true both in fanon and canon,

some of Jason love interest in canon are: Barbara (yes, for some reason that is canon in some dc universe) and Artemis (the Amazon from outlaws). And in fanon: Roy and Koriand'r All of them are redheads

now Dick, in canon: Koriand'r and Barbara (again). In fanon: Wally Still, all of them redheads

so yeah, the first to robins have a thing for redheads, but the third and fourth (beacuse Steph is more like robin 3.5) have a thing for Kryptonians... let me explain

romantically in fandom, and in frienship in canon, Tim has Kon, and Damian has Jon and the fact that dc gave Jon a boyfriend, and the same goes to Tim, but that boyfriend isn't their bat/supes counterpart...

so yeah, this is my headcanon do what you want with it


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4 weeks ago

At a certain point SuperBrentMan where Bruce is Superman and Clark is Batman starts to become more common, and more accurate...

Bruce starts to noticing it, and with some investigation finds that is usually the same 3-4 accounts that make the more accurate, on a personal level, fics

In the mean time that bruce starts to go crazy because he can't find the identity behind those account: Lois, Jason, Barbara and sometime Tim with Kon formed a "SuperBrentMan fic club" and they are the ones behind those 4 accounts that make the accurate fics, and they love it

At some point Clark finds the fic Lois was working on because she forgot to close the file when she asked Clark to proofread an article she was working on, and luckly for Bruce, Clark made them reveal the truth and that their secret identity was safe

It is widely known in fandom spaces that Gotham is heavily split between the SuperBat shippers and the BruceMan shipper

It's an all out ship-war, the two sides vehemently hate and bash each other online

One day someone proposes the obvious: a poly ship

SuperBruceMan becomes one of the biggest ships in the Gotham real-people shipping community

And then Bruce Wayne ruins everything, by publicly dating nobody-reporter Clark Kent

This spawns a third faction (the Brent shippers), and the magic of poly ships are forgotten

Until someone (yet again) proposes polyamory, and SuperBrentMan is born

Identity shenanigans quickly becomes a SuperBrentMan staple, as the ship is made up of two civilians and two unknown vigilantes/superheroes

And thus, the first SuperBrentMan miraculous square fic is born

The utterly charming but ditzy Bruce Wayne must find a way to tell the life of his life, Clark Kent, of his secret identity as an alien superhero, while Clark Kent tries to come clean about being Gotham's dark knight

The real Clark and Bruce are just thankful that the shippers got the identities switched


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1 month ago

after some seconds of blank silence Tim comes in

Tim: it's too low, his voice is too low and the growling keeps messing with it, the voice changer sounded too strange, so for that we are giving to people the excuse of a sore throat Dick: yes, that Diana: *blinks* Diana: ...ok?

Bruce gets a bad concussion with the JL, it's how his identity is revealed. Bc he can't stop talking in his bruice voice and he doesn't know he's doing it (like those people who hit their head and getaway accent)

can we do it the other way round where bruce has an unskippable wayne event he has to go to but he got a concussion day of and now for some reason he can’t drop the batman voice. he just has to go be brucie wayne but while growling menacingly every fucking word and he cant stop. some of the JL are also attending this event as their super personas and they don’t know what to do bcs their old pal brucie wayne is sounding EXACTLY like their coworker batman and eventually dick has to pull them aside and cover for him like ‘ok so dad got caught up in an emergency and we asked batman to cover for him as a favour. he’s wearing a face change technology thingy’

diana is like ‘how come you have face changing tech and not voice changing tech?’ and dick just stares at her for a really long time bcs he truly does not know what to do


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4 years ago
Ecco A Voi Un Semplice Tutorial Sul Come Fare Una Classica Bomba Finta Per Cosplay.

Ecco a voi un semplice tutorial sul come fare una classica bomba finta per cosplay.

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Questo è il mio primo post in italiano , ho deciso che avrei postato doppio e tradotto nelle due lingue che parlo.


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carmelitacreep - Carmelitacreep_cos
Carmelitacreep_cos

I'm italian, but as you can see I can speak english, so I will post in 2 languages

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