I’m right and I should say it
so i made another one bc these are hella fun to write
Remus Lupin to it is perfectly normal to cry in wonder woman: can we establish the ground rules for tonight
Sirius Black: rules schmules
Remus Lupin: do you want your arse to be front page news again?
Sirius Black: those readers were blessed
James Potter: I have it framed
Sirius Black: aww babe
Peter Pettigrew to can you die from too much Nutella?: where are you guys???
James Potter: sry SOMEONE was being dramatic
Sirius Black: it’s not my fault the hairdryer broke
Sirius Black: I couldn’t leave with DAMP hair
Peter Pettigrew: hurry the fuck up
James Potter: pete its fine
Peter Pettigrew: its raining and ive been waiting twenty mins
Peter Pettigrew: it is noT FINE
Rita Skeeter (@ritaskeeter) tweeted: ‘The Maruaders’ frontman James Potter flirts up a storm with old friend Marlene McKinnon at Oscars, are they dating?
Sirius Black (@siriuslyblack) tweeted: @jampots how could you do this to me?
James Potter (@jampots) tweeted: @siriuslyblack you weren’t supposed to find out this way
Marlene McKinnon (@marlsmckinnon) tweeted: @jamspotter you can’t afford me
James Potter (@jampots) tweeted: @marlmckinnon rude tbh
James Potter to Remus Lupin: are ppl acc believing this crap
Remus Lupin: you didn’t exactly help the situation
James Potter: what if evans sees it?
Remus Lupin: I thought you were over it
James Potter: ….
James Potter: i am
James Potter: one hundred percent
Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: he’s not over it
Sirius Black: well obviously
Sirius Black: he’s been playing her album on repeat for the last three weeks
Remus Lupin: are you still stealing his spotify?
Sirius Black: im not made of money
Remus Lupin: you have a Porsche….
Sirius Black: details details
James Potter to SUIT UP: who’s doing the speech if we win the grammy?
Peter Pettigrew: I thought you were
Remus Lupin: you said you’d written it
James Potter: where’s the evidence
Remus Lupin sent a screenshot
James Potter: well shit
Rita Skeeter (@ritaskeeter) tweeted: Lily Evans throws drink over James Potter at Grammy’s, is it over his relationship with Marlene McKinnon?
Marlene McKinnon (@marlsmckinnon) tweeted: for gods sake I am NOT dating james
James Potter (@jampots) tweeted: @marlsmckinnon I’m hurt
Marlene McKinnon (@marlsmckinnon) tweeted: you know I love you rlly @jampots
Remus Lupin (@rjlupin) tweeted: @marlsmckinnon @jampots this is exactly what I was talking about
Peter Pettigrew to Sirius Black: why did she throw her drink at him?
Sirius Black: he apologised for being rude to snivilus
Peter Pettigrew: how does that make sense??
Sirius Black: but then he said it wasn’t his fault she was friends with a racist twat
Peter Pettigrew: oh
James Potter to Marlene McKinnon: did you talk to her?
Marlene McKinnon: mate you need to drop it
James Potter: I’m an idiot
Marlene Mackinnon: yes, yes you are
James Potter to Lily Evans: I’m an idiot
James Potter: and I’m sorry
Lily Evans: you can’t keep apologising and then not changing
James Potter: what do you want me to do evans?
Lily Evans: move on potter
James Potter changed the chat name to lets get drunk pls
Peter Pettigrew: u okay?
James Potter: not rly
Sirius Black: we’re on our way
The Daily Prophet (@TheDailyProphet) tweeted: James Potter photographed kissing mystery girl in back of club
Lily Evans sent a photo to Marlene McKinnon
Lily Evans: is that who I think it is
Marlene McKinnon: you’re not seriously jealous
Lily Evans: ofc not
Lily Evans: its just a bit of a surprise
Marlene McKinnon: you told him to move on lil
Lily Evans: I didn’t mean with dorcas
Rita Skeeter (@ritaskeeter) tweeted: James Potter’s mystery girl is Dorcas Meadowes, close friend of Lily Evans and Marlene McKinnon, all 3 attended school with The Maruaders.
Sirius Black to no the next album will not be called sirius and the others: someone buy teabags
James Potter: there are spares under my bed
Sirius Black: about that
James Potter: you fucker
Peter Pettigrew: did you try moonys stash in his wardrobe
Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: you stay away from those teabags
Sirius Black: too late
Remus Lupin: I’m telling mrs potter
Sirius Black: you wouldn’t
Remus Lupin: too late
Dorcas Meadowes to Lily Evans: u know me and james were just messing right
Lily Evans: why does everyone think I’m bothered
Dorcas Meadowes: bc u r
Lily Evans: I’m not
Dorcas Meadowes: so our snap streak ending was an accident then?
Dorcas Meadowes: 308 days !!
Dorcas Meadowes: gone !
Lily Evans: I might be slightly bothered
The Daily Prophet (@TheDailyProphet) tweeted: ‘The Marauders’ raise £2 million for charity with their new single
Lily Evans to James Potter: it’s incredible how much you guys have raised
Lily Evans: you should be really proud james
James Potter to Remus Lupin: she called me james
Remus Lupin: who?
James Potter: evans
Remus Lupin: oh
Remus Lupin: OH
James Potter to Lily Evans: thanks lily, it means a lot
Lily Evans: so… you and Dorcas?
James Potter: we’re just mates, it was a bit of fun
James Potter: we both know there’s only one girl I’m interested in
Peter Pettigrew to graham norton for prime minister: controversial idea
Sirius Black: go
Peter Pettigrew: Portugal shouldn’t have won Eurovision
Sirius Black removed Peter Pettigrew from the group
Lily Evans to James Potter: i have a question
James Potter: oooOOOooo ominous
Lily Evans: are you ever not dramatic
James potter: we literally went to stage school
Lily Evans: im just going to ask my question
Lily Evans: why is your twitter handle jampots??
James Potter: why not
James Potter: it’s iconic
Lily Evans: why do I like such a lame person?
James Potter: so you DO like me
James Potter: !!!
James potter: also who even uses lame anymore???
Lily Evans @lilevans tweeted: quick twitter poll; who thinks the word lame is lame
Sirius Black @siriuslyblack tweeted: @lilevans the REAL question is who uses semicolons in tweets ???
Remus Lupin @rjlupin tweeted: @siriuslyblack it’s like you’re allergic to good grammar.
James Potter @jampots tweeted: you’re not helping your case here evans
Lily Evans @lilevans tweeted: @jampots I’ve seen your match attacks collection sit down
Peter Pettigrew @realpete tweeted: @jampots @lilevans ouch burn
James Potter @jampots tweeted: @realpete traitor
Sirius Black to James Potter: I just read this article
James Potter: oh yeah?
Sirius Black: so we’re dating
Sirius Black: and we have a kitten called Beatrix
James Potter: what??
James Potter: it would obvs be called cassiepoiea
Sirius Black: omds cassie for short
Sirius Black: the blacks hv flaws but our names are fabulous
James Potter sent a photo to I miss Minnie telling us what disappointments we are
James Potter: me and sirius bought a kitten !!
Sirius Black: shes so cute !!!
Remus Lupin: we’re not allowed pets in the building….?
Peter Pettigrew: and I’m allergic to cats
James Potter: honestly you two are so selfish
James Potter: we can’t take her back
James Potter: are you seriously going to break her little kitten heart
Sirius Black: we already made her an instagram and everything
Sirius Black to Remus Lupin: ???? hv u seen my jacket
Remus Lupin: would it kill you to use grammar properly for once
Sirius Black: nvm acc i found it
Sirius Black: also rude
Remus Lupin to bring back remus being a werewolf conspiracy theory 2k17: we going out tonight?
Sirius Black: yassss
James Potter: can’t, going for a drink w evans
Sirius Black: oooooOOOOOO
Peter Pettigrew: is that what the kids call it these days
James Potter: seriously?
James Potter: don’t answer that sirius
Sirius Black (@siriuslyblack) tweeted: this is a psa that james puts sisters before misters
James Potter (@jampots) tweeted: @siriuslyblack chill
Peter Pettigrew to 3 decent ppl + jim the traitor: james has a hickey pass it on
Sirius Black: whAT
James Potter: wtf bro
James Potter: how do you even know that
Peter Pettigrew: I came in to bring you tea
James Potter: oh yh
James Potter: thanks for that btw
Sirius Black: we’RE GETTING OFF TOPIC
Sirius Black to Euphemia Potter: james got a hickey from lily
Euphemia Potter: Lily Evans?
Sirius Black: that’s the one
Euphemia Potter: I always thought she was lovely
Euphemia Potter: Now what’s all this I hear about you stealing remus’s teabags?
‘You ran away from home?’ ‘When I was about sixteen,’ said Sirius. ‘I’d had enough.’ ‘Where did you go?’ said Harry, staring at him. ‘Your dad’s place,’ said Sirius. ‘Your grandparents were really good about it; they sort of adopted me as a second son.’
(and I know this set will probably be confusing to some people since a lot of people like Kristin Scott Thomas as Walburga but she’s always been Mrs. Potter to me)
Jace stepped forward first, in a gear jacket printed with golden runes, and held out a hand to Alec. “I stand as suggenes to Alexander Lightwood,” he said with pride. Magnus felt about Jace the way he had felt about many Shadowhunters over the years, Fairchilds and Herondales and Carstairs and others: fondness and faint exasperation. But in moments like this, when Jace’s love for Alec shone true and untrammeled, he felt only gratitude and affection. Alec took Jace’s hand and they began to walk the pathway of light. Magnus made to follow them, warlocks having no tradition of suggenes—a companion to the altar—but Catarina stepped forward, smiling, and took his arm. “I fought our mutual green frenemy for the privilege of escorting you,” she said, indicating a fulminating Ragnor with a tilt of her head. “Come on, now—you don’t think I’d let you approach the altar alone? What if you got cold feet and ran off?” Magnus chuckled as they passed by familiar faces: Maia and Bat, Lily wearing a tipsy crown of flowers, Helen and Aline whistling and clapping. Helen had a blue band around her wrist as well as gold runes on her clothes; so did Mark. “My feet have never been warmer,” Magnus said. “They’re positively toasty.” She smiled at him. “No doubts?” They had reached the end of the lighted path. Alec stood waiting, Jace beside him on the platform. Behind them was the ocean, stretching out silvery-blue as Magnus’s magic, all the way to the horizon. Their closest friends ringed the platform—Clary with her arms full of blue and yellow flowers, Isabelle carrying Max and sniffling back tears, Simon alight and smiling, Maryse with Rafe by her side: he looked solemn, as if aware of the significance of the occasion. Jia Penhallow stood where a priest would stand in a mundane ceremony, the Codex in her hand. They had all donned shawls or light jackets of silk, runed in gold; silk banners hung suspended in the sky, printed with runes of love and faith, commitment and family. Magnus glanced down at Catarina. “No doubts,” he said. She squeezed his hand and went to stand beside Jia. There was a second ring around the platform: The Blackthorns and their friends were all there, clustered in close. Julian smiled his slow quiet smile at Magnus; Emma glowed with happiness as Magnus crossed the wooden platform and took his place opposite Alec. Alec held his hands out, and Magnus took them. He looked into Alec’s blue eyes, the precise color of his own magic, and felt a great calm descend over him, a peace beyond all other peace he had ever known. No doubts. Magnus didn’t need to search his soul. He’d searched it a thousand times, ten thousand, in the years he’d known Alec. Not because he doubted, but because it shocked him so much that he didn’t. In all his life, he had never known such surety. He had lived happily and had no regrets, he had made poetry out of wondering and wandering, had lived untethered and gloried in freedom. Then Magnus had met Alec. He had felt drawn to him in a way he couldn’t have explained or anticipated: He had wanted to see Alec smile, to see him be happy. He had watched Alec turn from a shy boy with secrets to a proud man who faced the world openly and unafraid. Alec had given him the gift of faith, a faith that Magnus was strong enough to make not just Alec happy, but a whole family happy. And in their happiness, Magnus had felt himself not just free, but surrounded by an unimaginable glory. Some might have called it the presence of God. Magnus just thought of it as Alexander Gideon Lightwood.
Queen of Air and Darkness - Magnus and Alec’s wedding scene 1 (via magnusbane-aleclightwood)
Why do people write Lily treating James like shit?
I lost count of how many fanfiction I’ve read where Lily slapped James, said that he was bad or was completely mean to him, even when they started dating.
I feel like people forget that yes, we can write Lily as a strong woman but being strong and feminist doesn’t mean slapping your boyfriend everytime he doesn’t agree with you or you think he’s being stupid.
Just because he’s a boy, doesn’t mean he deserves it or doesn’t feel it. Boys are people too, they should be treated with respected. It’s not funny or cool or character development to have her treating him like she’s better and he is lucky that she even accepted going out with him.
I’m not going to tag or quote the most recent examples I’ve seen of this because I feel like these people don’t deserve this type of thing but please stop. Lily can be loving and a feminist, she can spend every day with James or want to be a housewife.
Write strong women. Write real women.
When you discover that these two:
Were married in Love Actually
What the world sees Harry Potter as: A somewhat bland protagonist. A little serious, and without much of a sense of humour. Why didn’t he end up with Hermione? And why did he keep Ron around?
What Harry actually is: A complete sass-master and sarcastic joker. Hot-headed and brash, with a fierce protectiveness over the people he cares about. Treats Hermione as his big sister, and finds her really annoying most of the time. Wouldn’t be able to function without his best mate and platonic life-partner Ronald Bilius Weasley. Will probably curse you if you diss Ron. NO-ONE disses his wheezy.
What the world sees Hermione Granger as: Bad-ass female role model, and a literal genius. Incredibly beautiful, brilliant at all forms of magic, and almost perfect in every way. Literally the reason why Harry survived everything throughout the series. Why did she settle for Ron?
What Hermione actually is: A vindictive know-it-all, but has a heart-of-gold and loves her friends deeply. Is jealous, emotionally insensitive, and has trouble socialising. While responsible for the book-smarts, she is also prone to ignoring small but important details that are important in the wider picture. Will start fist-fights with anyone who dares besmirch the name of the love of her life, Ron Weasley.
What the world sees Ron as: The sidekick and comic-relief of the trio. Eats a lot, and makes Hermione cry. Makes a lot of dumb jokes and silly faces. Not a brilliant friend, by most accounts. Emotional range of a teaspoon. How did he land such a great girl as Hermione?
What Ron actually is: The heart and soul of the golden trio. Completely irreplaceable to both Harry and Hermione. A literal cinnamon roll that deserves the world. Quite possibly the funniest and wittiest person you will ever meet. Has the best and healthiest emotional range of the trio. A flawed but solidly good individual who made mistakes, but always came through for his friends in the end. Has the best character arc of the three protagonists, and a great example of a person rising above their flaws and self-doubts. Never thought he was good enough for anything, but eventually developed his own self-confidence. The perfect match for Hermione in every way; the yin to her yang, the calm to her intensity, the water to her fire, and a person so wonderful Hermione can’t believe her luck that she ended up with him.
I love this man so much it hurts
BELLAMY BLAKE APPRECIATION
Happy b-day bellsarmy!
tell me the story of neville longbottom, the other boy who lived.
tell me the story of a boy who was born unimpressive, who could have been a chosen one had snape listened longer at the door. who had parents that loved and cherished him for far too short a time. who lost his mother and father to the cruelty of death eaters, who had to grow up with a family that always saw him as less than who he was, who he could be, because his magic remained hidden inside him, coiled like a snake.
tell me the story of a boy who could never quite handle school, who could never muster the courage to raise his hand in class, who always messed up his potions somehow. who sat in the gryffindor common room as hermione patiently went over her history of magic notes for him and wondered for the millionth time why he didn’t end up a hufflepuff. who never saw himself as anything special, not really, because there were other kids in his year whose stars burned brighter, while he struggled just to keep up with the bottom of the class.
tell me the story of a boy who stepped up, who foresaw hogwarts descending into darkness and refused to let it happen without a fight. who became the next leader of their secret fight against the dark lord, rebelling against snape and the carrows from within the castle. who led the surge to take the sword of gryffindor from snape’s office; who took blow after blow from torturing death eaters to try and protect the first-years who didn’t deserve any of this. who ended up hiding in the castle, creating a supply line to hogsmeade and continuing to fight under threat of expulsion (and worse) because someone had to do it.
tell me the story of the unchosen one, who went from a nervous little boy to the slayer of nagini in seven years. tell me about that neville longbottom.
I hope we do better there. I hope Jasper was wrong, and we aren’t the problem. I hope your lives there will be as happy as mine has been. Be the good guys. May we meet again.
Insp