Please understand that not every marginalized person is going to have a list of peer reviewed sources and accurate statistics proving the bigotry they face in their daily life and you sometimes just have to decide to believe people when they tell you they are suffering
I think that it's really important for people to realize that being disabled is traumatic. genuinely. your body and brain feel like they are breaking down and wrong. you are in constant heavy stress from stuff like chronic pain. most disabled people i know have a somewhat regular emotional break down from the trauma of it all. and we are expected to just smile through it by society, to not be in the way, to not be an issue.
me: ive been bedbound for six months
dr: have u tried getting up?
me:
dr: being upright is good for u to prevent deconditioning
me:
dr:
me: it was in fact the first thing i tried
Regular reminder you don't owe anyone information about your health, disability, or medical treatment. You have the right to provide as much information as you are comfortable with and no one is entitled to more.
hi, i want to share stuff about my life with chronic migraine and other health struggles. i'm still in the process of getting diagnosed for the latter, but strongly suspect that it's mecfs. a few weeks ago my condition got worse and i feel very isolated so here i am.
disabled people should be allowed privacy. visible disability isn't an invitation to demand personal information from someone. and disclosing disability isn't an invitation to lay out each facet of that disability in excruciating detail. someone having a medical episode deserves privacy even if that episode happens in public. someone who is disabled and struggling or taking a break deserves to refuse people offering help without having to explain why. a disabled person who mentions some things about their disability but not every little thing is under no obligation to explain anything more than they already have. disabled people don't just deserve basic rights. they deserve dignity and grace and respect. and they deserve privacy
One of the most dangerous things in the world is not being able to say no to people because you don’t want to upset them or dissapoint them. This will completely ruin your life in every way possible, at work, in your private life, your sex life and your friendships. It’s a way of removing your own consent in your own decisions and go against your wishes, it is always a crime against yourself. Let yourself have a say. Upsetting people is better than traumatizing yourself.
Your friends and family with chronic pain aren't doing well.
Yes, even the ones that say they are.
Yes, especially the ones that are complaining and lashing out already.
Chances are high that however bad they will admit things are it's actually worse. By a lot.
We're conditioned to be "okay". If we're breaking down at non scheduled times we aren't coping well. I promise.
Your sibling/partner/bestie/parent who is breaking down without preamble on a Tuesday is suffering. Be kind. We're sorry.
shoutout to the people who desperately want to move out but can't because they have medium/high support needs, and their family is the only people they have to rely on. especially since autistic and disabled adults are much more likely to suffer from loneliness. i hope you get what you need soon.
to me, the universal trust in doctors from people who haven't experienced medical mistreatment/neglect is akin to the trust that upper middle class and white people have in the police. they haven't experienced the mistreatment themselves so they assume it doesn't exist. they assume that every doctor or police officer is only in it for protecting people. they assume that the people who made the rules for these organisations are somehow all-knowing and know the truth about what is morally correct for society. the difference is that there actually is such thing as a good doctor, while there is no such thing as a good cop.
I've been worried ever since I was born