Tony: Yep I’m A Tall Glass Of Water, Ready To Quench Your Thirst

vt

I hope this posts in order! @twink-on-the-brink​ @gracefulvaudeville​

It’s end week... who else is prepared to die?✋🏼

small writing exercises

make up an origin and meaning of a name

write a family history going back centuries

pick a character and make them ramble about their favorite thing

make up a fable, pretend it’s as famous as the Grimm fairytales. how does this fable affect the world and what would people reference from it? (i love this one because it can be as crazy and silly as you want)

make a commercial for something that really shouldn’t be sold at all. try to convince people to buy it.

ACRONYMS. but, like, try to have it make sense

make a poem about your story/something in your story

rewrite a classic but put your own twist on it

make up a detailed recipe

make a monologue with a plot twist or punchline in the end

create a ridiculously detailed timeline for a character

childhood memory (real one or make it up!)

improv rap lyrics

the story behind an inside joke

make up a mythical creature

pretend to be a commentary youtuber and pick a topic

the what if? pick a story and create an alternate ending to it

pick one scenario and several characters. how different are the reactions based on their personalities?

oH mY gOd It’S rObErT dOwNeY jR

Here we go again.

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND !?!?!?

I WAS attACKED

Remember this?

Well

It happened

LITTLE JOSH WON!!!!

More Ancient Than Magic

Summary: The Hogwarts AU ft. big brother Peter, BrOTP3 shenanigans, Dark Lord Thanos, and Head of Griffyndor Professor Stark

AO3 Link

For my wonderful giftee in the irondad secret santa exchange: @iamallyetnotatall I hope you like this!! I tried to use all your prompts and I had a lot of fun writing it! Have a really happy holidays and a wonderful New Year <3 <3  and thank you @irondadsecretsanta for planning this wonderful initiative! <3

-o0o-

“Petey do you copy?” Morgan’s dramatic whisper crackles in Peter’s ear. He brushes his fingers briefly against the enchanted earpiece to adjust it, smiling when he hears her little giggle.

“Yeah, I copy, anyone coming down the hall?”

“Nuh uh. Are you doing okay too?”

Peter takes stock of his situation. He’s currently sticking to the walls of a looping staircase whose steps he knows are one hundred percent booby-trapped. The last time he did this, he had a giant L on his forehead for seven hours and several extremely unnecessary and overly mortifying photos taken of him.

This time, he wouldn’t be defeated by some stupid stairs.

So far, his genius plan is working. So obviously, he deserves to brag about it. Shamelessly. “What’d I tell you M? Easy-peasy lemon squee-” Peter squeaks as he slides down the wall, the sticky charm wearing off as his concentration fluctuates.

“Oh my God, no no.” Peter mutters on his breath, pulling out his wand as quick as he can, “Inhaero!” He whisper shouts and all at once, the sticky quality returns to his hands and feet and he continues the trek up the tower.

“Phew.” Morgan says, “That was close.”

Peter cringes. “Way too close.”

As he nears the top of the stairs he can’t help but grimace as he examines all of the enchantments carved into the lock of the door and tries to remember all the charms he knows have been added- but what should he expect from the Head of Gryffindor house’s private chambers?

Carefully, he walks up the wall onto the ceiling so that his feet stick to the top and he hangs upside down, scrutinizing the lock. “Okay…” he whispers to himself, “M, read me the book again.”

“Kaaaay.” She chirps, “First you have to cast the ill-u-shan charm.”

“Good job Morgan.” Peter praises, “But it’s illusion, with a j kinda sound.”

“That’s weird.” She says immediately, and Peter can just see that familiar Stark look of dismissive confusion.

He snorts, “Yeah, English is weird, but hold on just a sec.”

Peter pulls out his wand, ready to reveal just what exactly was guarding the door. “Incantaeum revelare.” Immediately, the doorknob glows blue and a series of colours burst out like flares.

“What the-?” Peter’s so taken aback by the rainbow of lights that he doesn’t notice when several things happen all at once.

First is Morgan’s squeak of surprise, “Daddy!” and the somewhat distant, “Hey munchkin, what are you-”

A dramatic gasp.

Okay so he’s seen the instruction paper. Alright, alright, Peter’s super screwed alright-

Second, the rainbow light immediately disappears and okay he can deal with that, it’s okay, it’s- but then the stones shift beneath him and an entirely new door made of obsidian bursts through the floor. Okay that’s not good but- oh shit, oh great, suddenly, each of the steps starts shaking, sliding left and right until even the ceiling shakes and-

“Oh no.”

Peter’s charm breaks and he falls right into the ground just as Tony’s voice ricochets off the walls, “Parker!!”

“Oh NOOOOO.” Peter groans, quickly running through the list of every spell he knows and finding it extremely rude that no one had already invented an Oh Shit I’m About To Get In Trouble Can The Ground Just Make Room For Me Within It Ok Thanks Bye spell.

BuT tHat wOuLdn’T bE a uSEfuL sPElL fOr YoUNG WizARDs.

Okay, so he dies then.

Resigned to his fate, Peter sprawls atop the now dormant steps and just waits until the Head of his House finds him.

Tony arrives carrying Morgan on his hip and a dry, yet still vaguely amused expression. “Peter.” He greets.

“Professor.” Peter replies, in that same tone.

Tony looks behind him, cracking a grin, “Well, at least you got past the staircase this time.”

Peter throws himself back on the steps.

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