Vulnerable Hannibal In Any Form Is My Bread And Butter. But Traumatized Hannibal Is My Precious Little

Vulnerable Hannibal in any form is my bread and butter. But traumatized Hannibal is my precious little pumpkin and I can never cease to ramble and theorize about how that would impact Will and Hannibal's relationship. I think it would be monumental if Hannibal wasn't even able to make it to the gates of the Lecter estate at all during a post-fall visit to Lithuania.

Imagine all the trauma that the simple act of walking through those woods would unearth for Hannibal. How it would revive his fear of succumbing to the elements.

My headcanon is Hannibal was in fact traumatized by everything he went through as a child. He just lives in denial and repression until it's brought to the forefront of his mind while in a situation he can't escape. I know it might seem ooc to many people, but Hannibal losing composure is my fave thing ever; epecially when it's in relation to his childhood trauma.

Will takes Hannibal to Lithuania. Before the next step of their relationship can develop any further, Will wants to learn every part of Hannibal. Both past and present. He's aware of Hannibal's persisting reluctance on the matter. He's aware Hannibal is doing this for him; but also for himself.

Hannibal's words have dwindled into monosyllabic responses the moment they stepped foot in Lithuania. It's late spring; so the weather shouldn't be a problem. He knows. It's only the slightest bit chilly; a bite laced in the wind that seeps into his bones and leaves his mouth and throat dry; parched with apprehension. He's one step behind Will. Two Steps. Three steps. Four...

Will's heart plummets the moment he turns around to glance at Hannibal. He's been periodically checking in throughout their journey toward the estate. Not rushing Hannibal along is imperative.

This isn't at all how Will envisioned it would turn out: Hannibal frozen in place, both eyes clenched shut against an onslaught of unspeakable memories, arms wrapped around his own torso in the form of a subconscious, self-soothing hug, while one hand creeps higher and higher towards his throat. He's sucking in shallow, whistling breaths and clawing at his neck with trembling fingers; skin itching and tingling from the phantom sensation of a chain-link collar he remembers all too well.

Will calls out his name, soft and cautious, because Hannibal is somewhere else entirely. Lost inside his mind. Will's hand clutches and stills Hannibal's frantic moving fingertips; the pressure gentle yet insistent. "Stop that," is what Will intends to say, but Hannibal's reaction leaves him speechless.

Hannibal flinches, releasing a frail, tearful whimper (the closest sound to a sob Will's ever heard Hannibal utter), and soon enough there's a visible wet patch staining the front of his pants. Will pulls Hannibal into an embrace, uncaring of the putrid stench of urine.

Imagine poor Will being blindsided by it all. Especially the act of Hannibal soiling himself in response to his re-emerging PTSD. Imagine if Hannibal clung to Will with the desperation of a scared child, head tucked underneath Will's chin so he wouldn't have to catch a glimpse of the woods that have haunted his dreams since he was eight years old. Imagine if he could only muster a rasped whisper of one word ("home" in his native tongue), begging for Will to take him far away from here.

Imagine if this moment was the first time Will ever used a term of endearment (darlin', sweetheart, or baby) in reference to Hannibal + the first time Will pressed a grounding kiss into Hannibal's hair + the first time Hannibal experienced any semblance of Will's affection post-fall.

More Posts from Coffee-in-rain and Others

8 months ago

omg i’m speechless (/positive). i never expected my housewife hannibal fic to receive all the love it has which still blows me away nearly one year later. i’m so happy to hear it resonated with you and i hope one day you get your happy ending. i also love any of sourweather’s fics too btw <3

i love sourweather fics coz i read one where hannibal in his injured state forces himself to become useful for will. even in pain he cooks, bakes, cleans, and does all the chores out of regret and fear that everything he did to will would finally urge him to leave him forever. which was understandable so its realizing that he couldnt undo the hurt he did to will and he finally succumbs to it by serving will anyway he can and when will realizes this he tells him its okay and he chose this and he doesnt have to prove anything so they both become vulnerable and they pledge heartfelt promises of forever and not hurting each other again and i think i deserve this kind of ending

edit: oh my god i think what i read was actually shrike by coffeeintherain not from sourweather lolll


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7 months ago

hannibal lecter apologists rise up

when the objectively bad person has traumatic and honestly reasonable reasons for why theyre like that but it doesnt excuse their actions and only serves to make them more tragic as a character

When The Objectively Bad Person Has Traumatic And Honestly Reasonable Reasons For Why Theyre Like That

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2 weeks ago

I really wanna know what happened in Mizumono moments after Hannibal smelt Freddie’s perfume on Will. How did he end the visit? How did Will not notice a shift in the atmosphere with his empathy? Like come on, Willy boy—put that over-empathetic brain to work. 😩

And the dinner scene when Hannibal suggests they run away together, feed Will’s dogs, and leave a note for Alana—but Will doesn’t want to. I bet Hannibal was fighting back a sniffle and a tearful hiccup with each bite. You know that sore, sandpaper sensation in your throat when you’re about to burst into tears, but holding it back?

Imagine if while Hannibal was eating, he choked because his throat felt so raw and Will had to do the Heimlich maneuver on him—and it only worsened his emotional state because Will has been playing him and just witnessed him gasping for his life over a small chunk of lamb. Tears are streaming down his cheeks, but Will believes it’s only a simple case of watery eyes. Then an ugly, voice-cracking sob bursts from Hannibal’s chest because Will is being so gentle with him—rubbing his back and asking if he’s all right (since he’s never nothing but elegance and grace 24/7)—and for the first time in decades his voice abandons him.

He hasn’t felt this off-kilter or this unlovable since he was in the orphanage—mute and alone—just waiting for someone to truly see him.

Will’s seen him—but he knows Will doesn’t want him as he is—who he’s always been. It’s a crushing blow. One he never thought he would have to experience because he never imagined meeting someone like Will.


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3 months ago

sobbing and nodding my head at every single word of this post.

another totally unhinged hannibal post coming at ya but lemme just sit on hanni's side of the table for a sec and just, like, gush for him

this man has been looking at will like this

Another Totally Unhinged Hannibal Post Coming At Ya But Lemme Just Sit On Hanni's Side Of The Table For
Another Totally Unhinged Hannibal Post Coming At Ya But Lemme Just Sit On Hanni's Side Of The Table For

both where he's bloodied and bruised and just like so happy will didn't die in the first one and then season three when will bites dude's cheek off and spits it onto a plate??? Hanni could not be more proud of what will has become are you kidding???? I'm being a teenage girl for him right now because how could you not be happy that the person you're in love with is as unhinged and feral as you are??? (feral is not a word I would use to describe hannibal but will definitely is)

and then, to put it in perspective, from hannibal's pov, working his ass off for years to get will to understand him, to see him for what he was and to accept him and even love him. he loves will. that was almost blatantly stated in the show.

but in wrath of the lamb, will finally reaches for hannibal instead of the other way around

Another Totally Unhinged Hannibal Post Coming At Ya But Lemme Just Sit On Hanni's Side Of The Table For
Another Totally Unhinged Hannibal Post Coming At Ya But Lemme Just Sit On Hanni's Side Of The Table For

will reached out so hannibal could help him up but there is no heterosexual explanation for what happens after that. will's grip on his shoulder? strong. will resting his head on his shoulder? g a y.

and hannibal looks so relieved. he looks so relaxed. because we finally got here. that light tug on his shirt? we got here and it's almost everything he's ever wanted and then will lays his head on his shoulder and it's almost too good to be true.

it's beautiful, he says

and hannibal closes his eyes and puts this moment in his memory palace, because yes, it is

all gifs by @bloodydancy


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2 months ago

vulnerable Hannibal fanfic idea rambles:

Post-Fall Hannibal and Will on a getaway boat. One day, Will coaxes Hannibal up deck to sunbathe because he's been deprived of the natural outside air and the sun's rays for so long. Hannibal curls up on the sofa and rests his head in Will's lap. He hasn't felt the touch of another in years and gasps when Will's fingers begin stroking through his hair. He doesn't know what to do in wake of the sudden onslaught of affection. Will's fingers trace over his temple, his clenched eyelids to wipe away the moisture, his dampening cheek. He doesn't anticipate the next moment: Will leaning down to kiss away a stray tear on his temple and whispering reassurance in his ear.

Hannibal being self-conscious when he first starts speaking again after becoming mute for a few weeks/months because his accent is thicker.

Hannibal getting an infection post-fall because his immune system is weak from being isolated for so long. When he has a fever and Will puts him into a cold bath to bring it down, he panics and Will has to reassure him and hold him down the entire time.

Hannibal's food issues resurfacing when he gets an infection and can't keep food down for nearly a week.

Hannibal and Will at a party (sometime post-fall when they're recovered) because Will's coworker invited them and Will agrees because it'll help them blend in. there's a little girl who made homemade ice cream and asks them to try it. Hannibal refuses because the temperature and texture of ice cream is too similar to snow. imagine if it's already angsty because they're in a small argument and Will says something like "open your mouth and eat the damn ice cream" (because the girl is watching to see if they like it) and Will shoves a spoonful of it into Hannibal's mouth. triggering Hannibal's cryophobia.

Hannibal being overwhelmed when Will asks if he wants a second helping of food for the first time when they're finally recovered from the fall. He's only ever been given three helpings of food and an occasional snack throughout the last 3 years. (turning into a bit of a ramble) but imagine if Hannibal is struck with a sudden familiar urge that he hasn't felt since living at his uncle's home: the urge to eat as much as he can now that there is unlimited access. Hannibal waits too long to answer and Will takes his silence as confirmation that he doesn't want seconds. He does. But it feels too late to answer; a missed opportunity. Cue Will's empathy kicking in and he's hit with every emotion Hannibal is feeling and sits back down at the table (right next to Hannibal instead of across the table) with a second serving, coaxing Hannibal to eat; that it's okay to still be hungry.

Hannibal forgetting certain English words when he's exhausted (or because of brain damage) post-fall. Will asks what he wants for breakfast and Hannibal mumbles "blynas" or "le crêpe" instead of pancake.

Hannibal being nervous to say "i love you" for the first time to Will because it's unpracticed; something he's not yet said in the English language.

Hannibal freezing up when Will asks what's the last thing he ever said in his native language.

Hannibal's gunshot wound becomes infected sometime post-fall. He regresses (involuntarily) because it's too much stress for his body to handle at the moment. It comes time for Will to lance the boil and normally, Hannibal's pain tolerance is very high (most things don't phase him), but right now, he's restless: writhing and sobbing as Will proceeds to drain the puss from the infected area.

Will gets a job post-fall to maintain appearances. He comes home one afternoon to an empty house until he reaches the backyard and finds Hannibal curled up on the outdoor sofa, napping beneath the sun.

this next one is a very old idea (from 2023) that i never explored: Hannibal and Will are at a restaurant for a dinner with a coworker, etc to blend in. Someone is a relative of one of the men who killed Hannibal's family. Hannibal makes the connection and doesn't want to cause a scene, but speaking becomes impossible. His speech starts to slur and he stumbles over every other word. He excuses himself and retreats into the bathroom and throws up. Will finds Hannibal hunched over the toilet and all Hannibal can do is cling to Will, begging to be taken home.

another old idea (i don't think i'll ever write it myself, but i would love to read it if anyone ever wrote it): Hannibal and Will are staying with Lady Murasaki while they recover. One night, Will asks Lady Murasaki what Hannibal was like when he came to live with her and his Uncle Robertos. Will learns of Hannibal's muteness, nightmares, issues with wetting the bed during night terrors, and his issues with food: how he was very malnourished and hesitant to eat in front of other people, how he would either gaurd his plate and eat as fast as he could or refuse to eat at all depending on the meal, how he panicked the first time they tried to serve him a bowl of soup, how he would sometimes raid the pantry or the fridge in the middle of the night when he thought everyone was asleep, how they would find food hidden in his room for safekeeping, how he cried the first time they gave him a birthday cake (because he hadn't experienced that in so long), how he refused to eat most cold foods (like ice cream, etc). Will also learns of Hannibal's progression from muteness leading to the ability to speak again. How Lady Murasaki and his Uncle Robertos noticed Hannibal was self-conscious during that first year (because vocal fatigue would often set in, making it even harder to pronounce words without it being hindered by his accent, while learning a new language. Especially because other children would tease Hannibal for having such a thick accent which he eventually trained himself to tone down). Cue Will's heart breaking because he wonders if Hannibal still does it: tones down his accent out of worry people would struggle to understand what he said. Then Will goes back upstairs, where Hannibal is asleep and writhing in bed because of a nightmare. He recognizes the stench of urine and wakes Hannibal (who's in distress), providing comfort and helping Hannibal get cleaned up and changed into a new set of pajamas. Will comforts Hannibal (knowing he's ashamed for wetting the bed) and calls him "sweetheart" for the first time.

Hannibal having lupophobia (fear of wolves) ever since he was a child and watched a pack of wolves eat the bodies of his tutor and parents and scratch at the cabin windows and door to get in. Also, imagine young Hannibal being chased by a rabid wolf when he finally escaped the cabin. He and Will are living in Canada post-fall and one day, they're either walking around town or in their backyard when a wolf appears, leading to Hannibal's distress.

9 months ago

Part 2) Blood gushes from Hannibal’s wound and from his mouth (where he bit his tongue on impact). His eyes are glazed over and Will realizes he’s having a flashback.

(this next part is barely a wip idea—but Hannibal was nearly drowned at the orphanage during a bath—by an adult who found him difficult to deal with—when he was sick with a cold and too weak to fend for himself. In that moment, he just wanted his papa or mother to save him. But he could only depend on himself).

“Tėtis,” (papa in Lithuanian) tumbles from Hannibal’s mouth, flecked with droplets of blood. Along with the word “Praušu” as he flings himself into Will’s chest, knocking them both to the floor. He burrows into Will’s lap, desperate for warmth and consolation. Will decides he can put his plans involving Hannibal’s impending entrapment on hold for one night.

Imagine if during Will’s honey trap era, he dropped by unannounced and found Hannibal slumped on the floor of his kitchen—wearing his red sweater and matching pajama pants—too weak and fatigued from the flu to make it back to bed.

He’s fevered and shivering, barely holding onto a half-eaten piece of toast that’s dangling between his sleep-slackened fingers. His bangs are fanned out across his forehead, softening his features and two days’ growth of stubble dusts his jaw. Will manages to wake him and strips him down to his boxers to wrangle him into a cold bath in hopes of bringing down his fever. Hannibal panics and tries to climb out—away from the frigid water—but Will holds him down.

Cue, Hannibal’s cryophobia emerging for the first time in decades and he regresses. In under a minute, he’s sobbing and on the verge of hyperventilating, clinging to Will and losing his footing as he makes another effort to escape—slipping back into the water and busting his chin on the edge of the tub.


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2 months ago

you absolutely gobbled and left no crumbs

I haaaaaaate when people respond to top!Will/bottom!Hannibal posts with "they switch" efbqwelkfb. OBVIOUSLY they switch. But we're talking about the beautiful phenomenon of Will topping Hannibal right now. Let's take a moment to appreciate that.


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2 weeks ago

Hannibal's toilet being removed in the BSHCI is something I'll always want to explore in fics because the whump possibilities are endless. Humans can supposedly only last three to five days without water. Hannibal is no different.

Hannibal's toilet is removed and a gaurd needs to escort him to the bathroom from now on. His meals are suddenly being left on the floor right outside of his cell where he can look at them but not reach them because no one wants to have to take him to the bathroom. For the first day, Hannibal doesn't feel very put off by it because the food isn't even that good. He needs to use the bathroom but no one comes. So he ends up peeing in a corner. Then, the next day comes and he starts to feel thirsty and his stomach is growling. His plate of food is left on the floor again. He smells the first plate of food start to go bad. Two more days pass and Hannibal's mouth is now dry as a desert. He tries to ignore the hunger and the thirst. He faces the wall to keep from seeing the food just out of reach. He knows humans can only last so long without water. That's when he starts to feel real fear. He swallows his own saliva because he's so thirsty, but it becomes impossible when his mouth is so dry. His lips are chapped now, uncomfortably so. He doesn't have to use the bathroom anymore because there's nothing to expel. This is the first time Hannibal's gone without food in decades. Imagine how much trauma would resurface. Being starved when food is still visible. Like in the cabin. He's getting quite scared now when it becomes the fifth day without food or water. He lays in bed because of fatigue. He doesn't expect to see Will on the afternoon of the sixth day. Imagine Hannibal regressing in that moment because it's too much; being so thirsty and hungry and seeing Will (who is mad at him after sending someone after Molly). He wonders if this was Will's idea. A form of punishment. He's curled up in bed when today's dinner plate is passed through his cell. He doesn't move to get it. There could be something in the food or the water. He's being watched by Will so obviously something must be amiss.

Five minutes pass and Will is still staring, brows furrowed. "Come eat," he says.

But Hannibal can't even if he's craving a droplet of water. Dread fills Hannibal's veins when Will leaves moments later. Then, Will returns twenty minutes later with a bag of food from one of Hannibal's favorite restaurants and a key and a water bottle. He feels relieved and overwhelmed all at once. Hannibal is struggling to sit up because he's feeling so weak and lightheaded. So Will needs to help him, and that's when Will notices how chapped Hannibal's mouth is. That he's probably not eaten or drank anything at all in the last few days.

Imagine Will asking "Are you thirsty, sweetheart?" and Hannibal starts tearing up and nodding. Will guides a straw past Hannibal's chapped lips and is left in shock when Hannibal finishes the entire bottle in a minute, still trying to drink even when there is no water left.


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4 weeks ago

Post-BSHCI Hannibal

He would be a trembling, over sensitive, touch-starved, sobbing, snot-nosed mess during their first time before they both even undressed.

it's time for top/bottom discourse to end. the only thing i want to hear about is which one is the sex crier.

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AO3: coffeeinrain. adult. they/he. 18+ only. minors DNI. pfp &amp; header by @cedarxwing

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