Happy Four Days Late Valentine's Day From Rollan And Meilin!

Kunugigaoka's Garden of Eve Podcast: The Introduction

Kunugigaoka, Japan's top junior high school. All thanks to a man having climbed to the top with his bare hands and sheer ambition. After such a harrowing journey, he then selflessly chose to pass down his wisdom accumulated from the top to his humble students, inside the classrooms of Kunugigaoka.

Kunugigaoka: where Class A reigns supreme with their academic, athletic, and all around perfect aptitude, while the rest fall at their feet in order to learn and educate themselves to be even greater. Our grand leader and son of the possibly omniscient principal, embodies this system with his whole being.

And yet this year, End Class, bottom of the barrel, the shadows of Kunugigaoka's light, has soundly beaten the rest in one very clear aspect.

Now, you may be wondering what this aspect is, wondering if it has anything to do with the sudden competence 3-E has shown in the second quarter midterms. Some students, such as Takebayashi-san and Kataoka-san have even risen to unexpected heights, directly challenging the kings of the school.

And let's be honest people, Class A are not ones you want to tussle with. The likely-hood of you coming out unscathed, mentally sound, and without a lawsuit after you is not great. Luckily Class E's accomplishment isn't so grand as to warrant such actions, seeing as the majority of them were in the average zone. (Akabane totally dropped big time)

Besides, grades can be won back with enough studying, which is simple enough for the cream of the crop.

However! There is something no hour long study session can hope to overcome unless you resort to either a) plastic surgery, b) spend time on pampering that you could be spending on studying your ass off for the next exams, or c) the most difficult of all: be a good person.

(Not that I'm thinking of anyone in particular for the latter…)

End Class, better known as Eve's Garden between the illustrious academy whispers, are all hot as hell!

How do they, those who will grow to shine the elite's shoes and kiss our asses in hopes of a promotion that will never come until the day they die, have such charming features that seduce our on-campus companions till this day?!

Victims who have since gone back to the right side are reportedly ashamed of their transgressions and claimed that they were deceived and manipulated by Class E's honey-sweet words and their devilish reputations, pleading for the purehearted to fall into sin alongside them.

But I don't think a few well placed compliments would be enough to sway such a vast number of our kind. Something was amiss.

It was right then and there that I decided: in order to protect our dear students, I shall arm them with weapons of knowledge. Knowledge of 3-E's weaknesses and most importantly of all: their strengths. For whatever better way to prepare oneself than to face the threat head on, albeit in simulated form?

Join me, an unnamed/anonymous member of the Light Radio Club as I bravely dissect and disassemble all of Class 3-E's succubuses and their wicked charms, each spell designed to bewitch the good student's minds and lead them off the path of virtue.

I am AC, host of Kunugigaoka's Garden of Eve Podcast. Tune in next time for my next report on the dangers of Class E and how to defend against their devious tricks. [Peace out!]

(BTW, don't listen to Kunodon. Beauty on the inside matters the most in the end kids! Also, don't worry Class President-kun, you're still number one on the hotness chart and in my heart ;p)

meet the archons

better quality

Wild horses crossing a river in Iran Photo: Eydi Heydari

Heroes of Erdas, all together!

(You can kinda see an erased Uraza next to Abeke. Animal heads are beyond me for now unfortunately. I thought about making another guy too, but ehhhh)

Supportive space-uncle

Some Doug family details I thought would be nice to add:

His mum had him at 20 with her college boyfriend at the time who bailed on her and left her to raise her kid in her own. She dropped out of college and went back to her hometown to live with her father, who set her up with a job working at a friend's company.

Now, she's trying to earn a biology degree online while working as a mechanic. (She sounds like a Dorothy to me)

Doug's aforementioned grandfather, whom I affectionately call Grandpa Bo, is also a mechanic, a car mechanic to be specific.

He likes to work on a little more delicate things like clocks and cameras sometimes as a hobby and dabbles in wiring and coding. A bit of a gruff old guy, but sweet nevertheless.

He owns a car mechanic shop called Bo's Auto Repair Shop, or BARS as everybody calls it for short.

Doug works part-time there, although he's less of an employee then a barely willing volunteer

As for why Dorothy isn't working there, in her own words, "I would die before I let my paycheck be decided by my old man"

The whole family is into anime, so they make that into their Movie Night Friday. Whoever wins rock-paper-scissors gets to choose.

Doug's family, while on the rough side and prefer a pounding on the back then a hug, is completely and totally there for him.

Bo doesn't really get why his grandson wants to spend the rest of his life writing articles upon articles of some other people's business, but he does know that Doug needs a good camera and help making a website, and he's the best guy to go to for both.

Dorothy understands more then her dad, and while she secretly hoped that he would pick a more, er, secure job, she supports Doug nevertheless.

Does anybody else think it's weird that nobody in Lolirock has a last name? Personally, I think the surname Irving fits well with this family. Doug Irving has quite a nice ring to it.

How Nathaniel got his job at the smoothie bar: Part 1

It all started with a tradition

Every week, without fail, since seventh grade Nathaniel and Doug have been coming to the same smoothie bar down the street.

Always the same routine; sit down at the counter, wait for the other to come back from whatever club activity kept them, order a smoothie, and dive into fandoms, school, the latest middle school drama, and in general just hang out.

They were there since during the cafe's early days, so the owner, a nice middle aged dude who just had his first kid (congrats!), and them are friends thanks to their long time patronage

And so, one day in freshman year of highschool, Nathaniel was complaining to Doug about how he doesn't have any money and that his mom had really been getting up in his business about college now that he's in highschool.

The owner overhears and tells Nathaniel that he's been thinking about hiring a new employee since his last one quit on him and says he could go for a trial run. Nathaniel of course jumps on the opportunity. How could he pass up the chance to work at one of his favorite place to be?

It was a disaster. Pineapple chunks spewed everywhere, strawberries mashed in the sink, mangoes tossed into the fan, and in the middle of it all was Nathaniel, on his phone, furiously questioning Google.

As it turns out, Nathaniel was terrible in the kitchen. Well, more like he's scared of everything in the kitchen. Ovens, knives, and, you guessed it, blenders. (A past trauma from one of his older, more rambunctious cousins.) The only kitchen appliance/tool Nathaniel wasn't scared of is a microwave and that's not very helpful in a smoothie bar.

As much as the owner would like to hire Nathan, the owner really doesn't want or have the money to hire someone who can only do cashier work.

The owner helps him clean up his mess and in his gentle tone, albeit with more then a hint of exhaustion, to maybe find a job as a cashier at a McDonald's instead.

Giving the newly fired Nathaniel a pity smoothie, the owner waves to the embarrassed Nathaniel goodbye. The man himself was too busy dreading his mother's response after he had bragged about the job to wave back.

Thinking that maybe he should run away to Hawaii, he walks by Doug's house. Wait.

Backtracking in an almost comedic fashion, Nathan finds himself just standing there in front of the house as he argued with his inner voices.

On one hand, if he goes in he'll have to tell his best friend that he's afraid of blenders. On the other, if he goes home then he'll have to tell his mom that he got fired on his first day. In the end Nathan chose the short term option.

Smiling as the door opened, his smile twitched when Doug's jaw dropped.

"Heyy Doug! Um, do you mind if I crash here for a bit until I figure out how to tell my mom about-"

"Holy shit dude what happened."

"I'm getting to that."

So starts the 4th longest weekend in Doug's entire life.

Auriana's Take On Love

Auriana was a romantic at heart. Yes, it's true her ventures in romance were many, and she admits that she may not stick around for long. But she loves love nevertheless. There's just so much to love about it afterall.

Falling in love, for one, is always a blast. A sudden bout of carelessly slipped passion that has her cursing underneath her breath. Playful foot fights and knocking of the knees, leading up to shy shoulder brushes, and the ever hinting touch of the fingertip. The tell-tale rhythmic pulse of rushing blood and drenched palms. Stolen glances from the other side of the room that either break off immediately or turn into heated stare-downs with neither wanting to back off.

Ah yes, the falling. Ironic, seeing as it isn't a fall at all. Rather, when her heart jumps onto the cart, there is no falling but anticipation until the top. Unsure of the new course as she reaches further and further up, until she is hanging off the edge. It's always the highest hill that's first, the one that takes up your whole view because all you can see is down. A guaranteed promise of risk and adrenaline, and a slight bit of stomach turning. Exactly the kind of ride she signed up for. Auriana knew this since her first kiss with the court magician's son. (He tasted like Iris's attempt at lemon curd pie)

But as nice as the metaphor is, whereas a rollercoaster, with all their dips and loops, can never satisfy her needs with a single monotonous attraction, her loves had no such blueprint. They may buck like an untamed stallion and throw her off the rails, damn safety. They may tease her with a swerve as she settles into the dips. They may ease her with steady winds lapping her face as they cruise with leisure. Auriana prides herself to picking only the interesting after all. (Her standards are not recommended to be followed)

So is it all a sport for Princess Auriana of Volta? Does she simply ride until another catches her eye? Or until she decides that this one has not the strength to move her heart no more? Many would say yes, her bandmates included. But nay, the lady herself thinks otherwise.

Although she has been called flippant in her attitude towards love, there's a lovely hope, deep in her heart, that this one would be her last adventure. For them to be her last ride.

Of course, she has had no luck thus far. The trail of broken hearts and cut strings are plenty proof of that. Indeed, there were many sweet Earthlings that pulled at her heartstrings, some rather spicy ones that intrigued her curiosity, not to mention the roughened Ephedians that come by and remind her of home.

Despite that, she still dreamed of cuddles late at night, gazes meant for only one other so often shared by lovestruck couples, holding hands to the annual Dawning Festival in hopes of future luck, sharing scarves to shield from the cold, lazy bedtime kisses…

Maybe her expectations are too high. Or perhaps, as her close friends have hinted many times, too low. In Auriana’s hopeful (albeit unlikely) opinion, perhaps the Great Destinies of Volta had put her in a lover’s path and she has guided them to a better part of life in what seemed at the time to be an insignificant, now fateful action and would thank her for the rest of their life? A stretch, but not one without evidence. They have gathered at least three Oracle Gems from her voyeurs afterall.

For now, as Auriana sips her strawberry kiwi smoothie, she still hasn't quite found "the one." But that’s alright, she mused as she purveyed the small sandwich menu. Iris’s shanila just passed, Talia hasn't murdered her for tardiness yet, and Lolirock keeps getting more and more popular. Time is everything, and everything moves in due time, as her Father always said.

Maybe she should take a break from love. Focus more on sightseeing and taking back her kingdom after they defeating Greymore.

“A steak and cheese sandwich please,” Auriana ordered to the part-timer, deciding on the first sandwich that caught her eye after all. Checking her phone, she realized that for once, the schedule was subjectively free. (subjective because Talia had scheduled a strategy meeting; like they ever actually use any of the strategies against the twins in the heat of the moment.)

Sucking down her smoothie as she waited, she considered her options. Iris and Nathaniel are going on their not-double date with Carissa and Lyna, so she can't risk interrupting the romantic atmosphere. Talia was studying Borealis spell formations back at the house so no way in hell was she going near that place. Ticking off names off her mental list of friends, it was then that she realized that everyone else that came to mind all had plans or were her exs. What to do, what to do…

Skrrrck

Settling down onto the stool, the newcomer looked at the menu nervously. She looked to be around Auriana’s age with long blonde hair and a face that reminded Auriana of Earth’s bunnies.

Turning to Auriana, who was faking choosing a drink but was secretly side eyeing the new girl, she seemed to be quietly debating to herself about whether or not to risk talking to her before making a decision. Stuttering a quick accented greeting and introduction, the blonde turned to Auriana.

“Uhh.. Do you know any... good food?” asked the girl slowly, peering at Auriana through her lashes. Her head was faced down, most likely from the nerves talking to a foreigner. She’s cute, Auriana thought as she turned toward the nervous girl.

“Oui, les smoothies sont à tomber par terre,” Auriana answered cheerfully. Whipping her head up, the girl grinned toothily, happy in finding someone to communicate.

“You know French?” she asked, switching to her mother tongue.

“Yep!” Auriana said enthusiastically, just as happy to find someone to talk to.

“I went to France for work and picked up the language. It’s pretty cool how you can go from sounding like a gorbleck to a swiggle in a sentence, Like right now,” Auriana said, thinking back to the days when she and Talia were still searching for Iris.

The girl giggled, thinking it was some kind of joke. As the two talked, it wasn’t until she got the French girl’s number that Auriana remembered that she had left her sandwich at the smoothie bar.

The freaking Avatar shows up and he's just like, look I'm just here to warn you about my girlfriend, she's coming here on my grandson's dragon friend right now, so don't run it only makes things worse

Fire Lord Zuko passing a law that forbids challenging anyone under the age of majority to Agni Kai

Fire Lord Zuko waiting until the day he reaches the age of majority to pass this law, lest anyone think he is a coward

(No one. Literally no one would have thought that, but it’s generally regarded as a very classy move regardless)