Sometimes I Think About Throwing Myself Into One Of Your Machineries Because My Back Hurts So Bad I Need

😂😂😂

somebody get this bootleg underage willy wonka outta here 😭 @coffeescandyshop #notmywonka

Hands up for @thewillywonka #mywonkaaa #zebest 🎉🎊🎀

Wait a minute......

Goodnight world.

Faxx 😁💙🍬

somebody get this bootleg underage willy wonka outta here 😭 @coffeescandyshop #notmywonka

Hands up for @thewillywonka #mywonkaaa #zebest 🎉🎊🎀

Nooooo I love the oompas 😭

Heh...emergency calls. Be back later!

I haven't done anything since so

Hi. Your cult followers are still ganging up and attacking wonkasseur just because you 2 don‘t get along, they have already done damage with getting rid of coffeescandyshop permanently and I used to follow that person. They literally bullied them off tumblr just because their blog page didn‘t look flashy or whatever like yours. :( Like they keep tearing other people down while your just getting more and more popular. So it‘s gonna be a problem in the future because since your growing fast then more of your followers will just see and bandwagon the hate to fit in and get your attention. From what I see they attack random (lgbt) blogs that they don‘t like and other blogs if they think that you don‘t get along with them. I never seen anyone get bullied off tumblr until coffee left. You probably won't see this because of your notes but if you do please reply. I‘m really scared someone else might leave. I love you bc you seem mature and your funny and I think your probably an adult by the way you disencouraged their bullying before but I hate your followers very much; the ones that gatekeep you

Still?

Dm me.

Good morning, folks! Rise and shine, wipe the boogers from your eyes! It's show and tell time! ✨

You guys ever had chocolate soda? No? Then you're in luck!

Behold! The Berry Berry room. This very room is specially designed for soda pop creations beyond the wildest flavors. Everything from Root Beer to Chocolate Berry Blast. Which just so happens to be the new flavor we're still processing through our machine.

The Export and Float machine (above) fills every 12 oz bottle up with some of Wonka's magic ingredients!

But as you can see, we've tried it at least two hundred times and every bottle of soda came out a bit differently. In wonky shapes and sizes. So this is still in the works.

But with every trial and error, we've gotten a bit closer to our goal! Putting these babies in every store on every shelf!

That's all for now from the factory.

More updates to come soon! Til then.

- Willy Wonka 🍫

You gotta teach me your petty ways so I can have sassy and mean clapbacks ready like you do, cuz from what i seen you win fights with ease 💀

Of course! It's all about sarcasm, delivery and wordplay. But this isn't something that everybody can do, see you gotta have the sass and be able to execute it perfectly. ☝️

I close my eyes too tight

I hide in the shadows of my mind

Behind the doors of my heart

And wonder why he never woke up

Why people are ice cold

Then I slowly remember the reasons for why

I would rather be alone

Than to be around those who do wrong

Take advantage

And disarm

So I'll keep sculpting

Because it's the one thing

That doesn't bring me harm

I have nothing else to say

I'm not good at expressing my emotions

I wish people would do better

And love each other more

That's all

~ Edward

I'm sorry for our little fight earlier. This new herbal tea I'm drinking has me acting strange. Emphasis on herbal. I think Alice spiked it

All is forgiven. And since we're apologizing, I'm sorry for telling Edward that you're a no good gap tooth tea-drinking scallywag. Heh.

I'm not sorry for my comments about Alice, though. I stand by them, and now you see what I mean for yourself. She's clearly got you tripping off the herbs. What is it this time? Opium Poppy? Tsk tsk.

Lmfao I'm so sorry they got you involved with that they swore we were being mean ☠️

Just had some kid message me about being allegedly bullied by some of my followers, I blocked him.

Here's why: Number one: I'm not sure what happened. Number two: I'll never understand why some people think that just because they're having drama with followers of another person, that the person they're following is automatically involved or responsible for the others' behavior. I am not a parent. I am not part of the tumblr team. Half of my followers are obviously adults and I don't have any more authority than the next person to stop or encourage other people's behavior. I am busy running a factory - not a daycare, I don't get involved with petty online drama that doesn't concern me, even if the people involved are friends or followers. There's no point in messaging me about matters that have nothing to do with my factory or me personally. There are block and report options for a reason. Use them.

I hate having to post this, I'm terribly sorry. That just annoyed the living daylights out of me. Just as I was enjoying a nice glass of wine and-ugh. I digress.

Now back to your regularly scheduled program. Good evening.

- Willy Wonka 🍫