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Having an emotionally absent but otherwise present father is fun stuff because you live with an unknown man your whole life and are supposed to put up with his shit AND love him like ex-fucking-cuse me

I always try comforting myself with the “fact” that someday there’s going to be someone who will love me with all my flaws and cherish me and take care of me as I deserve.Atleast that’s the lie I tell myself everyday to get thru everything but in reality I know I could never be in a relationship because I’m unloveable,I’m too hard to handle and not enough at the same time, I could never trust someone ever again I dont want to cuz they’re going to put a knife in my back AGAIN,AGAIN and AGAIN.

watching another person with bpd also lose themselves to limerence..

crying and sobbing bc at the end of the day all i want is a partner who is sweet to me and thinks of me fondly

he is like the sun, always bright and exuding warmth. he made me realise I must really be the moon, because oh dear god, I'm always eager to follow after him

I envy selfish people. Do you know how exhausting it is to always worry about other people and their feelings even if it’s at your own expense?