czupl
even god can't help me *sad cowboy emoji*
142 posts
Latest Posts by czupl
Anyway Mouthwashing spoilers
I'm turning Curly over in my head for the narrative punishment he's put through. Like you could you COULD interpret him as a pure victim, framed for Jimmy's crime and forced to suffer in skinless silence while his assailant gets to assume his role but it's more than that, to me. It's not just Jimmy bad Curly good. It's Curly's enablement of Jimmy that sets all of this in motion and, now, how will you take Responsibility, Curly?
It's Curly's "I've known Jimmy a long time. He'll listen to me." It's Curly's brand of leadership that hinges more on being seen as a good leader than on actually taking action. Because being seen as a good leader requires everyone to like him and that's more important to him than actually protecting Anya from Jimmy.
You could say "Jimmy just had everyone fooled into thinking he was a decent guy" except no you can't, because Anya hid the gun from him knowing Jimmy may go ballistic learning she's pregnant with his baby. And she hides the gun because Curly wouldn't. "Why do they have locks on medbay and the cockpit but not in the sleeping quarters?" Anya asks to Curly. Curly knows Jimmy raped Anya but his brand of I Need To Be Liked leadership asserts that Jimmy deserves a seat at the table of this solution. Curly won't do anything. He won't do anything even when he says he'd do anything.
And this is even after Jimmy tore into Curly with left-field accusations about the crew being laid off being something Curly wanted. All the evidence we have says the whole crew is being let go, Curly along with everyone, but Jimmy turns on him and makes it out like Curly wanted this and Curly is the enemy to everyone else on the ship. Curly won't stand up for himself. He won't shut Jimmy down. Swansea holds onto the axe because when locked up the axe requires the Captain to unlock, and maybe Swansea recognizes he's on a ship with a Captain who would not use the axe on the man who needs it.
Curly never wanted anything bad to happen. He never tried to hurt anyone. He never crashed the ship. But he's the one person who could have shut Jimmy down for every horrible sign and action along the way and he didn't he didn't he didn't he didn't. And the very first time he tries to intervene is when it's too little too late. HE gets eviscerated. He gets all his skin burned off. Because of what Jimmy did, but because of what Curly allowed.
And now his chance to act as Captain is gone. His chance to do right is gone. Jimmy is captain now and everyone who knows he's a monster is no longer capable of acting against him. And now skinless voiceless eternally watching, Curly has to lie in his own blood and bear witness to what Jimmy is doing, to everything he enabled. At Jimmy's mercy now like all the others, who physically beats him now and who is there to stand up for Curly? Enable. Enable enable enable.
kocham mojego psa za szczekanie na stado dzików z warchlakami, które było niebezpiecznie blisko ścieżki; po prostu pochwalam jej intelekt i służbę w sprawie państwa oraz to jak dzielnie sprawiła że największy z nich podszedł parę kroków i przez bite 40 sekund śledził nas wzrokiem <33
GENSHIN MANGA SPOILERS! but honestly if you haven’t read it by now it’s your fault alone
So why did Kaeya initially try to hurt Collei?
The obvious answer- he was trying to defend Mondstadt, Collei was a very suspicious figure at the time, and he knew that being aggressive towards her would probably draw out her hidden powers and reveal herself as the culprit of the Black Fire incident.
But there’s more to it than that.
Kaeya canonically loves, LOVES kids. He adores them- there’s lots of times in the game where he talks about how precious childhood is and how he wants to protect the purity of childhood dreams for as long as possible before kids have to grow up and face the real world (kinda similar to Childe). In 3.8, it shows how he is literally willing to do anything to protect a child- Klee, when he literally throws aside his own sibling issues in order to shield Klee from being exposed to the same thing and scolds a couple of bickering brothers for upsetting her.
Additionally, there’s his whole thing with Mika and how he’s basically a big brother figure to the entirety of Mondstadt’s population under 17. The highly implied bond between Bennett, Razor, Fischl and him, even.
Anyway this whole aspect of his character obviously stems from his own childhood and how tainted it was by his hidden identity, so like he probably doesn’t want any other kids to have to go through such hardship especially while they’re still young.
So if he loves kids so much, and wants to protect them so badly, why did he not hesitate to become a full blown villain against Collei, literally wounding an innocent 12-year old girl?
Because he sees himself in her.
Collei hates herself (or at least she used to LOL). She hates the burden (her powers) that was forced upon her from a young age, and those powers inevitably label her as a bad person, one who can harness evil powers to kill And hurt and whatever. It makes her feel like she has no real control over herself, and that she has no self-identity- she doesn’t think of herself as a regular person, instead a monster. And she hates, hates, hates herself for it, but she shoves all of it down under a mask.
Sound familiar to a certain cavalry captain?
That’s why Kaeya didnt hesitate to Go after her. He knows her too well, knows that she’s hiding her true identity under a well-crafted face, that there’s something evil and dark in her- because that’s exactly who he was as a kid.
But then this panel happens.
Collei, evidently so tired of living such a torn life, gives up and offers her life to Kaeya just so that the torment can end, which stops Kaeya in his tracks, because that’s when she reminds him off himself just a little too much.
Kaeya, so caught up in her uncontrollable evil, forgets that she’s just a child, one who never should’ve been forced to deal with such a thing, and certainly not want to die because of it.
That’s exactly what happens internally to him, as well. Over the years, Kaeya internalized being a traitor so much, that often he convinces himself that he’s truly not a good person. Yes, he acknowledges that it’s really not his fault, but that still gets lost and it shows through when Kaeya shows us how willing he is to get himself harmed- because of his self hatred, he places so little value in his own wellbeing and his own life, because he thinks that all harm that comes to him is deserved and that it’s better off if he’s dead anyway so that he doesn’t have to deal with being torn apart every day.
No I’m not making this up, it’s in how he literally covers for Diluc all the time and risks himself in the process, and how Adelinde told us about that one time Kaeya literally took Diluc’s punishment for himself when they snuck into the wine cellars. There’s lots of times, even throughout in the game where Kaeya tries to convince us he’s not a good person- he quite literally says that, at some point.
Only when Collei shows that she’s in the exact same position does Kaeya realize what he’s doing and stops himself. Only then does he remember how painful and hard it really is, and he ends up helping to save Collei and removing her powers, because that’s one burden he can help take off, unlike his own.
Idk man for me the Kaeya vs Collei fight (I like to call it the chapter where collei gave us the hottest panel of Kaeya choking ever) told a story about Kaeya’s internalizations, too, and his own-self hatred and how deep it really goes. BRB CRYING
Posting this again because last time it didn't show up in the tags and no one saw it ;-;
As a rule of thumb, don't reblog donation posts or people asking for donations unless they've been vetted and reblogged by Palestinian bloggers. We usually go to lengths to verify this shit because we know scammers have been faking to get people to send them money, using the urgency of our genocide as bait.
It's disgusting this is what we're dealing with, but people are losing money because of some truly evil people out there.
Accounts don't just randomly spring up on tumblr without gofundmes while asking for someone to help them create a campaign. Fuck out of here with that shit.
#FreePalestine
Today is the planned Strike. Will do my best to help what can do. Even if just a post to raise awareness.
Also, if can, click the link.
ms paint Xinyan doodle from last night, was too tired to make a prettier background :P
42. Xinyan
Time to rock! 🎸🔥 indeed, it is not time to rock, as i couldnt fight my headache long enough to draw her guitar 🤕 not feeling too great today but i wanted to at least draw sth so went bk to the neglected challenge. which is nearing completion, just 8 more to go! the urge to nap is strong but ik itll just screw up my barely functioning sleep schedule even more…
who would have thought that drawing the way i used to draw in like 2018, simple style, flat colours, not having to worry about lighting or shading or extra details or backgrounds, is such a freeing experience. i feel like i just grew wings. who would have thought. trying to get better at art truly is poison
facebook pfp request from bestie :)))
no dress version
2021 vs 2023
the first one was made in Ibis Paint X and the second one in FireAlpaca
i have no idea how to make backgrounds
i forgor to take the pictures and now it's too late and there's too much snow 💀
can't wait for it to be 5 something pm to get some pictures of the most calming scenery to share with you westerners, unless the snow melts before 5, then you won't get pictures and i won't get the nice chemicals
can't wait for it to be 5 something pm to get some pictures of the most calming scenery to share with you westerners, unless the snow melts before 5, then you won't get pictures and i won't get the nice chemicals
Everybody come get soup! There's too much here!
chłop na weselu pyta mnie "cóż tam, panie, w polityce?". pokazuję mu pastelowe infografiki z instagrama. natychmiast ucina mi głowę kosą
Diona talking to Venti and Kaeya like
lamenting the fact my orange button down isnt ironed-passing and i have to iron it myself.
I am laughing.
This was posted 3 years ago on Quora.
Back in 2019, right after Tumblr was acquired.
but look at us now.
We’re literally like cockroaches, infesting this site like a bad outbreak.
We’re unkillable.