Dice

If a worker who isn't the owner says ANYTHING similar to "I'm not really supposed to do this but-" and then does something that helps you, under no circumstances inform the business, including through reviews. You tell them that the worker was polite, professional, the very model of customer service and why you like to go there. You do not breathe a word of the rulebreaking.

reblog if you believe fanfics are as valid as books that were published and sold by authors who write as their main careers. I'm trying to prove a point

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

Not Karl..

I find it kind of stupid how 'half full' vs 'half empty' is framed as an optimist/pessimist thing. If it starts full and gets halfway drained, it's half empty. If it starts empty and gets halfway filled, it's half full. If you don't know the starting state it's both simultaneously.

Gloves are so hard to type in

I have marching band gloves on rn

I almost lost my earbud?!

So I was outside and I had music playing in one of my earbuds. My earbuds tend to almost fall out quite often and I could feel it falling out. But when it fell out, it didn't hit the ground. I spent 3 minutes looking around for it and I decided to check one of my pockets. Can you guess what I found in a pocket that wasn't open enough for anything to fall into it, MY EARBUD THAT FELL OUT. I feel like this is a glitch in the matrix or something.

I don't know if God is real but if they are...

they aren't loving because if they were a loving god I wouldn't be so cold and rude.

hrmm... sixer.

(click for high quality)