THE VERY FIRST STAR TREK SLASH FIC PUBLISHED

Kitchen Nightmares is really just like

Owners: i don't know why my restaurant is failing. Chef Ramsey please help

Ramsey: hello i am Gordon Ramsay. How is the food

Owners: we have the best food

*food comes out*

Gordon: this is an alive rat

Owners: our customers love te alive rat. We have the best food. Every day they order the alive rat.

*dinner service*

Customer: oh my god this is an alive rat

Waitress: is everything okay?

Customer: no it's an alive rat

*food is sent back*

Owner: this has never happened before. Fuck you Gordon Ramsay you should just leave. People love the alive rat

*Gordon goes in the freezer*

Gordon: there are 25 molds unknown to science. The rats have set up a lab to study them. Blimey. Scientist rats. They've unionized.

*later*

Gordon: your food is bad

Owner: no!!!!!!!!

Gordon: yes

Owner: oh my god our food is bad

*remodel, menu change*

Owner: oh my god Gordon Ramsay you saved my life thank you so much

Gordon: promise never to serve alive rats again, yeah?

Owner: yes of course

*end of episode*

Gordon: ratatouille ammirite? *He walks away chuckling*

End card: the restaurant was shut down three months later because they went back to serving alive rats.

Please reblog if you think that “they/them/theirs” is a valid set of pronouns.

this post must be reblogged by everyone

Writers, please, please, please, I am begging you

I know we don't vibe with Mary Sues, and I know we like watching characters fail...

But if your character is the world's best assassin, they shouldn't be botching nearly every single step of every single job just because the plot demands it. If your character is one of the greatest fighters to ever live, they can't badly lose every single fight the plot throws at them and then barely win the final confrontation. If your character is a competent military strategist, they need at least a few small successes during the course of the plot. If your character is an experienced leader, they can't be constantly making the kind of missteps that realistically would cause their subordinates to lose confidence in them.

If your character is good at something. Show them being good at it.

It's almost 2 a.m. my time and I am so upset right now, I could have added this really cool scene I just thought of into my Kingsman fic!

Imagine Roxy just being her awesome self but she breaks character for a minute because someone brought a dog to the party and she just has to go and at least say hello, maybe pet it a bit, and Merlin can't even be mad because my man freaking LOVES dogs

I need to do a thing at some point, ugh

the butch/femme scene of 1990s san francisco by chloe sherman

I love Aang’s relationship with literally everyone

I keep seeing this so I feel it needs to be said: trying to ship Wednesday Addams with other characters based on what's "healthy" or "toxic" is just...so absurdly ridiculous.

Wednesday is not the "iconic goth girl aesthetic uwu." She's not just odd, quirky representation for people who aren't accepted based on outward appearances.

SHE IS LITERALLY DOWN FOR TORTURE. AT ANY GIVEN TIME.

SHE IS SELFISH, OBSESSIVE, JUDGMENTAL, AND DISMISSIVE.

SHE WILL STAB YOU AND THEN LICK THE KNIFE. FOR FUN.

Our girl does not represent society's concept of "healthy."

She's an outcast among outcasts not just because of her personality but also because she truly and genuinely loves fucked up shit and initially doesn't care about socializing with others that have different interests than she does. More importantly, Wednesday's character arc this season has nothing to do with going from toxic behaviors to healthy ones but instead has everything to do with admitting to and understanding her own emotions. And that's regardless of how healthy those emotions are or where they come from.

Wednesday changes a bit over time, but she never once does so in interest of becoming healthier or being a better person. In fact, multiple times she admits to being pretty toxic herself and was totally fine with that until it started backfiring on her. Wednesday has an obvious code of fairness and reciprocity that dictates how she regards and interacts with people, which shows she does sincerely care about others in her own way, but we also know that she has absolutely no problem treating those she cares about poorly as long as she feels it's justified. We see this with Enid, Tyler, Xavier, Thing, and (to a lesser extent) Eugene. But this only becomes an issue when she starts to feel lonely, or guilty when her impulsiveness results in others getting hurt.

So with regards to shipping, Wednesday finally hugging Enid and eventually kissing Tyler are not significant because they represent something "healthy" or "toxic." They're significant because in both these moments, Wednesday is fully aware of how she feels and what she wants when it comes to two of the few non-family members in the show who seem to truly accept her, toxicity and all.

Arguing that one option is better than the other because it's healthier or less toxic makes no sense with Wednesday. Like sure, ship whatever and whoever y'all want, but at least understand the characters.

traumatized fictional man with dubious morals I'd like to fuck

Bad Pacing Advice

Anything that can go wrong, should go wrong. Right?

Not necessarily.

This is really common advice for when a plot feels flat or boring. And sometimes, it's really good advice. But sometimes, it the worst advice you could get. It really depends on why the plot is feeling flat.

A plot is made up of beats: events that have to happen in order to move the plot forward. Another way of saying this is, what things need to happen before the story's conflict can be resolved?

When a plot is falling flat, it generally has one of three problems. Either there aren't enough story beats, the story is moving too quickly from one beat to another, or the story is moving too slowly from one beat to another.

Making things go wrong is good advice if there aren't enough story beats. Too few beats means there might be too much space between beats where the story can sag and get boring. In other words, slow pacing. It can also make the conflict seem too easy to resolve, because story beats are often obstacles that need to be overcome before the story can satisfactorily end.

However, if your story is moving too quickly between beats, making things go wrong isn't always the right answer. It can work if you deliberately use a set-back to delay getting between two points that would otherwise be too close. But just making something go wrong for the sake of it will only add more beats to the story, it won't slow them down.

If your story is moving too slowly, making more stuff go wrong is about the worst thing you can do. At best it just makes your story longer. At worst, it adds new beats between your already existing beats, increasing the distance between them even more. It might seem counter intuitive but making things go wrong (killing a character, losing a fight, getting captured, friendship and relationship drama etc.) can actually slow your pacing down more.

I notice this issue a lot in epic fantasy stories. Maybe it's just me, but I find when things are constantly going wrong -- when the plot isn't getting any closer to being resolved because every time the characters try to take a step forward they end up worse off than before -- I get frustrated and bored. I just start thinking "here we go again. Get to the point!!"

Sometimes your characters need to succeed too. Good pacing isn't making your characters fail at every opportunity. It's knowing when to let them fail and when it's time to move forward.

“theyre homophobic but theyre good people!!!” hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. are they really. are they REALLY. are they. are theyr eally. Are the