This is a neopronoun/xenopronoun positivity post! If you see this, tell me what your neos are!! >:3
I mostly just go by he/they but I also go by xe/xem/xyr and other canine-themed neos!
aside from the fact that that's not how queer community works in the slightest, the reason why the "queer spaces are safe spaces for women" bullshit falls on its face is because some women are also men. what are you gonna do about it? cry? shit yourself? have an existential crisis over whether or not that person is "safe" based on their genders instead of just talking to them like a person? misgender them? label them as a threat?
some ""non-men"" are also men.
now what.
Idk why but this reminds of this meme lol
Killing people from Spain while being an ex-policeman trying to find the president daughter
duality of man
CW: intersexism
Came across this infographic during some google image searching and I'm still kind of a state of despair about it because it's not just offensively wrong about what intersex is, it was used to teach university students about queer issues:
Alt text: LGBTQIA+ are defined one by one. Intersex is defined erroneously as "These are people who were born with genital organs of both sexes (male and female). It is a genetic condition."
It's one thing for your rando perisex person to be getting this wrong on social media. It's another thing entirely when it's professionals getting this wrong in an educational setting. 😩 And that this infographic appears in a peer-reviewed publication. 😩
It's even worse to know the students that were taught with this infographic were medical students, who will be the ones traumatizing intersex people for decades to come 😩
It's so wrong in so many different ways:
Intersex is not limited to people with genital differences. Most intersex people have intersex variations that are not apparent at birth, with puberty being the most common time of life for variations to present. Many people find out in adulthood having no outward physical differences.
Of the intersex people with genital differences, they do not have two sets of genitals. Most genital differences are still recognizably female or male (e.g. spadias), and those who have ambiguous genitals have one set.
Intersex is not "male parts + female parts" or even "intermediate male/female parts", it is an umbrella term for anybody whose primary/secondary sex characteristics don't line up with what is expected for male and female bodies. Some intersex variations make women look more feminine, or make men look more masculine.
Defining intersex by genital differences doesn't just exclude most intersex people, it also sets the tone that we are defined by our genitals. To be publicly intersex is to have non-stop DMs about your genitals. This sort of framing sets up openly intersex people for invasive questions and harassment, and it keeps large numbers of intersex people from coming out.
Many intersex variations do not have a known genetic basis. Many intersex variations are caused by exposure to certain hormonal levels in the womb. Certain medications when taken during pregnancy can trigger intersex variations.
While bodily variation is necessary for being intersex, the social experience of stigma, discrimination, isolation, hyper-medicalization, and hyper-sexualization are all just as much a part of being intersex.
📣 Perisex allies: this is shit you can stop. When you see other perisex people parrot this sort of misinformation, correct them. Direct them to look up resources written by actually intersex people.
Here are some starter resources to give:
Intersex explained by Hans Lindahl
Media and style guide by IHRA
FAQ by intersex-support
A recent post I did compiling information for trans people who want to be better intersex allies
Normalize not liking things for no reason or for stupid reasons.
Normalize disliking things others like and still treating them (the person and the thing in question) with respect.
Normalize not having an opinion on things.
Normalize not knowing things and asking others about them.
Normalize doing research.
Normalize disagreeing with your friends' tastes.
Normalize having mixed feelings about things.
Normalize being proud and loud about things you're into.
Normalize trying to emphasize with those you have opposing views with.
If something doesn't HURT anyone
It's okay.
We're only human!
We are not perfect and nobody should expect us to be.
Allow yourself to be you and to let others be themselves.
I feel so... down whenever I want to watch queer or trans videos because I know in the back of my mind that none of the current large queer content creators' content or community is safe for people like me, intersex people.
I love their work otherwise, but it hurts badly to hear them toss around casual intersexism in their videos constantly when discussing queer and trans issues and nobody ever mentions it.
And because these are large, popular creators, nobody has ever listened when I've tried to ask they adjust their language. My dms go ignored or unseen and my public comments get drowned out by fans defending their intersexist comments. It's emotionally draining and exhausting, I just want to be included in my own community.
All I thought of was this picture ever since I played the update so yeaaa
Need black forest cookie to be drawn similar to the sherk 4 poster
While we're talking about how triggers aren't one size fits all, can we also talk about how sometimes they're just plain stupid??
I can read, write, and watch rape scenes with minor discomfort, but a dubcon drunk makeout scene in a TV14 show made me shut down and turned me off of the show for a month because it reminded me of something that happened to me.
I can watch gore, body horror, and slashers galore with no problem, but watching people slice loaves of bread with razor blades on Bake Off made me feel sick because it reminded me of my own self harm.
Does it make sense? No. But that's just how it is for me. No two traumas are the same, and it's so selfish to think that someone exploring something traumatic in fiction, in any way, is a reflection of you and your situation.
You own what happened to you, but you don't have a monopoly on trauma lmao. You don't get to dictate how people write about these things. And you don't get to decide who is and isn't valid based on how they explore difficult topics in FICTION.
Hey gentle reminder that you can ignore those "Reblog! If you don't you're [extremely upsetting label here]" posts. You should ignore them, btw. You don't suddenly become a racist because you ignored someone trying to farm interaction, you don't become homophobic because you felt bad about exposing your followers and friends to that, you don't become a bigot because of other people trying to guilt trip you.
If you're not purposely causing harm to minority groups or hold bigoted beliefs, you don't suddenly become a bigot because you ignored someone being an ass. You're allowed to ignore guilt tripping messages and if someone gets irritated at you for ignoring them, tell them to get a grip. 🫂
Likewise, you're allowed to ignore:
Guilt tripping spam asks.
Scam asks.
"Reblog if your account is [group] safe!" posts
"If you don't reblog, I'm going to assume you're a [insert term here]" posts
"People are dying, you can spare some time to reblog" posts
Posts that show actual pictures of real life tragedy with the intent of hoping you spread it across the platform.
"How dare you donate to Ao3/Wikipedia when there's [insert other tragedies here] going on!" posts
Posts that imply that you shouldn't have a safe space and that it's cruel to have your account be a safe space.
Posts that say you shouldn't be happy while there's tragedies going on in the real world.
At the end of the day, 90% of those posts use the "other people have it worse" mindset and that ISN'T HEALTHY. You don't tell someone that's happy they aren't allowed to be happy because someone else is happier than them at the moment, so don't do it for pain and suffering.
Anyway, I suggest you block the people that make guilt tripping posts. Better for your mindset in the long run and people need to realize they can get their point across without triggering people's OCD/thought spirals.
{he/they} just an autistic forty years old lesboy {trans man dyke and proud} I'm anti censorship and harassment [any form of harassment will be deleted if it was on my posts]
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