Having To Reupload This Due To Using The Wrong Image Previously.

Laughter would be such a confusing emotional expression to alien species. I was watching a comedy live play tonight and laughed so hard that I cried at one point and somewhere in that fugue state I realized how absolutely bizarre a response that is.

Like, relieving tension is a response that aliens would almost definitely understand, but there are more intuitive ones. Massage, deep breathing, exercise, hell even sex make more sense than laughing from a purely biological perspective. But laughing? Briskly expelling air from your lungs so fast that it can overwhelm your system and sometimes cause even more physical tension? Wild.

You text an alien friend "lol" and they ask what it means and you have to look up the etymology because it's 2781 and it's just been its own word for centuries to tell them, "laughing out loud."

"What is 'laughing out loud'?" And then you send them a GIF and they text you back in all caps "ARE YOU IN DISTRESS?? DO YOU NEED MEDICAL ATTENTION??"

And you have to talk them down and explain and they start to feel better until you let slip that at least it wasn't so strong you couldn't breathe and then they spiral again because "this response causes asphyxiation? And it's INVOLUNTARY????"

Not that aliens are humorless of course, but I definitely don't actually lol at most od the Reels my friends send me. I just smile at the cleverness or the stupidity. This, I think aliens would understand—they smile at humans' cleverness and stupidity all the time.

I almost wonder if they would assume the other side of laughter first, due to its oddity to them. Because we know very well that sometimes laughter can let off tension in a bad way, too. A witch's cackle, a villain's chuckle, a little girl's giggle in a horror movie.

Would it be affirming, I wonder, to see the horror on a human's face when they lose contact with a member of their crew planetside and when they finally make contact again, all they hear is a slow, dark snickering through the comm?

After all, it's such a strange thing to hear, laughter.

Would it be a relief to see their faces pale with the same unease that the aliens' feel every time they hear that odd sharp sound from the depths of human throats?

Or would it strike an even deeper chord of fear, to see that sound that makes every human smile turn their face, instead?

made a gdocs OC sheet for Obey Me, since most of the templates I've seen are for artists and the doc templates are just simple txt files. as usual, it's meant to be for ppl like me who love to add a LOT of text <3

It's here if you'd like to use it! Remember to make your own copy -> File -> Make a copy!

A woman's place is on the battlefield

Hhhhh stalker ghost who you know has been talking you for the past month or so and yet. He's done nothing about it. And somehow he paid for your bills? Yeah imagine moving out when your rent has been paid five times over, envelopes full of cashed stashed neatly beside your desk on random days found after you wake up.

If a lil stalking is all it takes to survive in this economy who's to blame you. Okay maybe they will when that familiar blonde hair shows up one day. Almost unrecognizable without the mask in sight, flowers concealing the lower half of his face.

He's shyer than you expected, letting you lead him i while he just barges inside. Closing the door behind him perfectly because you know he's been inside the kitchen is still spotless.

"Uhm- Hi?"

"Simon."

"...simon?"

"Mhm."

"Okay, lets start over then? Hello Simon."

Shifty eyes still at you for a moment. Taking a deep breath and out

"Love you."

Then he's walking out. No room for opposition when he unlocks and closes the door in a fraction of a second. The perks of long legs.

You reach for the flowers to find them freshly ripped from the ground. Roots still attached when they go into a vase. He drops off a soil filled pot and some cash next time he disappears. Its odd, he reminds you of someone you once knew. Like a forgotten memory.

“Uhm. No I don't have an Obey Me au—” everyone has an Obey Me au dipshit it came free with the “devs keep retconning very important stuff, world building, characters and morality in Devildom and Celestial Realm has no consistency, we don't even know the real personality of our fav because they were written so differently so many times and we're all pretending there is a story and lore we like but in reality we're all screaming crying throwing up all over our blogs”

If I was in Hell I would be so curious what the hype with Cannibal Town is. Is it other sinners they’re eating, or did they somehow get human down there?

I bet Rosie has a “Cannibalism for Beginners” class with some basic meal prep, what meats are good and go with what, and maybe some history of the town and cannibalism. There’d also be a big array of stuff to try.

Alastor helps teach sometimes as someone with real world experiences and advice. He’s pretty popular for the newer cannibals who want to try something new, while the older ones would rather eat stuff raw.

Luci Headcanons

Lucifer throws hissy fits. All the time. His inner child is very angry

Lucifer refuses to eat asparagus due to choking on it and almost dying when he was a fledgling. The asparagus was cooked improperly so he couldn't chew it and he had to pull a whole string out of his throat.

Lucifer keeps every achievement his brothers ever have. It can be ribbons or shitty art from when they were five but he still kept it for old times sake (I saw another post saying he keeps the achievements in the part of his office that's up those random stairs)

Lucifer either sleeps in the middle of his bed as stiff as a board or sprawled out in disturbing positions in his demon from. There is no in between.

As a final "fuck you", God cursed Lucifer to have the scent of the Celestial Realm always follow him so he would never forget.

Luci actually cries a lot, he usually goes to Mammon when he does so

Lucifer absolutely takes Naps in Mammon's car. Mammon only allows this because he knows how much Lucifer needs sleep.

Lucifer has a few plushies in his closet since he doesn't feel comfortable asking his brothers for a hug.

Lucifer actually gets sick a lot but won't admit it. Overwork and not taking care of himself has weakened his immune system.

Lucifer has his brothers on his Home Screen and his lock screen is Mc with a knife being unhinged.

Mc could commit murder and Lucifer wouldn't bat an eye since he's used to everyone's unhinged bullshit.

Lucifer actually stopped drinking as much after making a pact with Mc, mostly to keep them from worrying

The buzz at the Hot Topic where all the mall goths flock 🦇 There’s something here for all geeks alike! Whether you’re emo, scene, metal, punk, rock, gyaru, kawaii, grunge, cringe, virgo, vegan, or some alt thing I didn’t mention already because my god there’s a lot of them, we got you covered!

I love women so much

I will stoop to subscribing to his onlyfans if that ghost cosplayer makes one. Everyone please avert your gaze during this trying time, this is a new low for me