I Have To Reblog This, Too Funny To Not

“Fatherless behavior” stop giving my DAD credit for all the work my MOM put into making me a terrible person!! Stop erasing women in history!!

Jason’s Titan’s Tower Attack AU

Bruce: *gets the notification of an attack 2 hours too late because of Hood’s hacking*

Bruce: *rushes to the Titan’s Tower, scared that Tim’s dead*

Bruce: *runs into the Tower’s living room and shouts with a breaking voice*

Bruce: Robin? ROBIN?! Where are you?!

Tim: *excitedly dashes into the room with a plate of cookies*

Tim: Look, B! We made cookies! Try them!

Bruce: *confused af, tries one*

Bruce: They… taste like Jason’s…

Bruce: *ready to burst into tears*

Tim: That’s because we made them together. Duh!

Jason: *waltzes in without helmet or mask but in full gear*

Jason: Well, Baby Bird, that’s it for today. Next bird sitting session will cost ya, old man!

Jason: *zetas away with a cheeky smirk*

Tim: Bruce, can I have another playdate with Jay?

Bruce: *Bruce.exe stopped working*

Saw a post about every Assassin knowing Cassandra Wayne was Cassandra Cain and I just need to know what the hell they think about Damian. Like the post said they all think Batman placed Cass with Bruce Wayne to keep an eye on him but what about Damian?

Like isn't it commonly known among anyone in the League of Assassins that Damian al Ghul was the son of Batman? So what do they think seeing him on TV as Damian Wayne?

Does the League know Bruce is Batman and they just don't ask questions? I'd like to think the older members remember Bruce being trained in the League, like they remember he was supposed to be Talia's consort. But what about the rest of the league?

Oh what's that? Damian is the Son of Batman? Makes sense. Damian is actually the son of Bruce Wayne? The airhead billionaire? Alright we've got some questions.

I need to know what Talia ans Ra's are telling people because Bruce Wayne is like worldwide famous, there's no way Assassins aren't going to realize that Damian is from the League. Is it like an open secret then? The League just knows Damian is Batman's son and Batman is Bruce Wayne but no one says anything about it because they want to protect Damian.

Furthermore, is no one going to question that airhead Bruce Wayne has custody of David Cain and Lady Shiva's daughter, Talia al Ghul and Batman's son AND his own son Jason Todd was also in the League? Do they think he's still somehow affiliated with the League? Like I need to know what kind of gossip passes around the league, I need to be part of it.

just looked over to find my cat had somehow crawled into the sleeve of my jacket ???? fucking wheezing. the baleful worm

I headcanon that babs is a hardcore Bruce supporter. Like she knows he’s emotionally constipated and dumb but like… he’s her asshole idiot. Like she throws a phone at dick and goes “call him.” Or she punches Jason so hard he has to sit down when he tries to say some rude shit about how Bruce never loved him. Like idk just babs and Bruce. (NOT ROMANTICALLY)

modern au where this is how Hiccup lost all of Berk's gold

things that make Gotham criminals say “oh shit”:

Batman showing up to the hideout and not asking any questions

Nightwing cracking his escrima sticks together with 0 witty banter or foreplay

Red Hood when his hands are shaking

Injured Robin and Batman known to be in near proximity 

Any sightings of Batman on Robin II’s death anniversary

Superman in Gotham without an escort

Batman speeding through the Narrows on a motorcycle and not the Batmobile

Red Hood abandoning his guns and throwing punches instead

Robin fighting with a sword and 0 supervision

Jim Gordon trying to quit cigarettes for the 19th time on the night shift

Any captured Batkid too injured/tired/frightened to taunt the responsible criminals

Batman bleeding and/or missing any major parts of his armor

Any Bat vigilante other than Duke outside during daylight hours

Tim (on the phone with Cass): I can be there in twenty-five minutes. I promise there's nothing that will distract me. I have to get changed, bye.

Tim ended the call and entered his apartment, focused on getting suited up when Bernard left out the bathroom in a silk robe, towel drying his hair. Tim's thinking was blocked seeing this.

Bernard (eyeing Tim with a smile): Hey, want to have sex?

Tim (closing the door quickly): I got time.

Two hours, three missed calls, and one angry text later

Cass tapped her foot, waiting impatiently for Tim to show up. He quickly raced down the street in his Robin suit. His face flushed and well aware he was late.

Cass (straight to the point): Hm, you had sex with Bernard. Next time make it quicker!

Cass walked past Tim without further elaborating. Tim moaned embarrassed as he followed her.

been rewatching rtte

toothless is called T multiple times, but the letter T doesn't exist in the alphabet of this world

i think hiccup was also called H???

hiccup went to the wedding of the man who tried to kill him and his family multiple times. no wonder he thought he could change drago's mind

snotlout is canonically a theater kid

"you're so small and cuddly" "please never say that again"

the twins are really smart, but they're also just stupid

hiccup straight up disappears when he's working on something

heather had a super noticeable crush on astrid

fishlegs got a love interest!! a plus size main character actually has a cool, badass love interest!

it was super hetnormative but it was cute

there was an island full of flying women who were implied to regularly commit cannibalism

hiccup taught all the riders how to fly with toothless, that's so sweet

everyone is a flat earther except for the twins

hiccup almost directly killed a lot of people

and killed a LOT more when destroying their ships

“scalding– cal..ding--" "toothle, plama bla!" was pretty much the funniest part of the entire series

dagur was bullied as a kid by a guy 8 years older than him who literally tattooed an imagine of him beating up little dagur in his arm??? What was that all about

actually we need to talk about how messed up everything about dagur is and about how the things that could've/did happen(ed) to him may be the reasons why he's Like That

just why was he imprisoned by the outcasts??? he didn't do anything to them directly

oof my brain is spiraling. "he loved you" "ig now we'll never know" what do you mean he didn't know if his dad loved him

there's a technically musical episode

tuffnut became hiccup's defense attorney and immediately got him the death sentence

hiccup regularly jumps off cliffs

he also jumped off a boat, with his arms tied and without toothless. just where did he think he was going

snotlout's annoying attitude is actually because spitelout pressures him too much and he feels like he has to be perfect for his dad :((

THE 'HICCUP'S EVIL MIRROR' VILLAIN THEME DONE RIGHT YESS!!!

viggo is the best httyd villain change my mind (you can't, swords at sundown, you may bring backup but i will win on my own)

skrill comeback skrill comeback SKRILL COMEBACK!!!!

"COMEEE TO DADDY"

what is a boar pit???

oh my god i had missed this series so much. it has no right to be this funny

this was my childhood. it has forever shaped the way i am

berserker heather the unhinged >>>

actually good disability rep! yay

hiccup complains about his peg leg pinching him

he straight up cannot walk without it and it is shown many times

"well, there are the benefits of a metal leg" after it got caught in a bear trap

funny moments, like snotlout trying to steal it to use it as a weapon

the jokes!! toothless laughing at the jokes!!! hiccup being so fucking done with the twins, who are always making the jokes!

there's an episode where everyone is so sleep deprived they actually start spiraling

astrid becomes a happy go lucky girl, hugs snotlout and tells him he's handsome

the fucking mood swings snotlout got were insane

the twins were straight up just hallucinating

"i sent them to wash their dragons, how could they mess that up?" cut to heather falling on her face with a bucket full of water in her hands

fishlegs becomes so paranoid, he's yelling at everyone all the time

"don't you know the trapper's trap can trap the trapper?? ...oh gods, i must be losing it, i'm quoting dagur"

YOOOO VALKA!!!! it's so nice to see her

hiccup tried to murder dagur to stop him from getting to toothless, which is scary bc it shows just how far he's willing to go for his bff, but also funny because hiccup. that was not going to work

oh the hiccstrid slowburn, how i have missed you

the twins's made up language

there was a beach episode turned murder mystery and a musical episode held at gun point

hiccup has a whole little speech that he periodically gives astrid to remind her that the twins serve a purpose

On the role of Alfred, as understood by the JLA:

Robin!Dick: "It's pretty much Alfie that calls all the shots, sets my bed time and Batman's."

----

Red Hood: "It's like a Charlie's angels situation."

----

Red Robin, before going against League orders: "The boss? You mean like, Alfred? No I haven't asked him yet."

----

Spoiler: "You really want to be late for the dinner? Alfred won't be happy."

Bruce: *closes computer* "We'll finish this up some other time."

JLA: *confused*

----

Clark, after Bruce gets severely injured: "Oh God, Alfred’s going to kill me."

Hal: "Relax, what's he even going to do? You're bullet proof."

Clark, groaning and sitting down, head in hands: "That's not going to stop him."

Oliver: "Say the word, and I'll get you on an island not found on any map."

Hal: ???