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Latest Posts by drunkdrivingthedeathstar - Page 2
If Imperials celebrated Life Day
Just like with the Death Star Krennic is being killed by his own creation once again
So, let's talk about Emperor Palpatine's last week leading up to the conclusion of Episode IV. Just for a moment, let's consider the position this horrible old space warlock was in, shall we?
Military Intelligence Director Orson Krennic colludes with ISB to commit ethnic cleansing on Ghorman. In typical Krennic fashion, this plan goes neither as smoothly nor as quickly as it was pitched to you as being.
Grand Imperial Admiral Thrawn disappears. Your single best military commander just disappears. Reports indicate space whales are involved??? What???
In response to Krennic/Partagaz's actions on Ghorman, Mon Mothma declares open rebellion on the Senare floor. Her speech is broadcast across the entire galaxy due to what is the first in an absolutely CASCADING series of failures by the ISB. Mothma successfully evades arrest, and escapes Coruscant to Force only knows where.
Darth Vader has taken this increasingly dire moment in Imperial politics to apparently take some sort of Sith PTO at his personal residence on Mustafar. Just about as far out of reach as he can possibly for anyone.
There is a catastrophic data security breach at ISB. It turns out an overly ambitious field agent has been invited to several Signal groupchats about the Death Star that she wasn't supposed to be in, and her collecting of all this vital data in one place has led to a Rebel mole piecing together that you're building the Genocider 5000 instead of a super cool renewable energy program.
Said Rebel infiltrator is then immediately killed by his contact, Luthen Rael, formerly known as Axis. Luthen spreads word of the Death Star to his allies, and then kills himself when confronted by ISB. Maybe your two most important links for piecing together the Rebel Alliance have been lost.
The Rebellion begins spreading propaganda publicly. Their manifesto is playing on just about every available radio frequency.
The ISB collapses. Supervisor Partagaz takes his own life. Colonel Yularen is left with an agency staffed by effectively no one. Your entire intelligence gathering apparatus that was working just fine last week now functionally no longer exists.
NOTE: the following events occur within the span of only 48 hours.
Due to the leak at ISB, the Rebels have discovered the existence of the Death Star, and in very short order manage to steal its schematics. Your special projects divisions on both Eadu and Scarif are destroyed. Director Orson Krennic is KIA.
Darth Vader is recalled from vacation early, and boy is he being awfully himself about it.
You disolve the Imperial Senate. Much as you had anticipated, this is making a lot of people very angry and is being regarded as a bad move.
Darth Vader has lost the Death Star plans. Nobody knows where they are now.
Grand Moff Tarkin blows up the planet Aldaran, a not insiginificant player in the Galactic economy.
Obi Wan Kenobi infiltrates the Death Star, and then quite literally vanishes. Vader is not taking this development well.
LESS THAN 24 HOURS AFTER BECOMING FULLY OPERATIONAL, THE DEATH STAR IS DESTROYED. Grand Moff Tarkin is KIA. Admiral Motti is KIA. General Tagge is KIA. General Bast is KIA. General Molock is KIA. General Romodi is KIA. Colonel Yularin is KIA. Darth Vader is MIA. Millions of soldiers and skilled military professionals are killed. Quanities of money so vast they cannot be comprehended by the mortal mind have gone up in a flash of smoke and light.
The culprit of this unfathomable trespass is soon revealed to be a 19 year-old boy. His name is Luke Skywalker. You now have not one but two of these freaks of nature to contend with. And you don't know where either of them are at the moment.
What the Hell is an Alluminum Falcon?
Honestly, I kinda feel bad for the guy. Just a little bit. If I were his age (ancient) and his condition (rotting from the inside out, filled with cosmic evil) I might just have had a stroke and died. It is amazing he made it all the way to be thrown down that reactor shaft in Return of The Jedi.
how many times a day do u think Vader said the wrong name in ESB. like on average
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You can rest there. - As a prisoner. - As a hero. (Andor 2x11 & 2x12)
been watching the prequels this month in discord, and got really really emotional over her last night after RotS
After andor the vibes in this meeting must have been WRECHED. The ISB collapsed, death star plans leaked, jedda destroyed in an embarrassing debacle, scarif raided all in one week and tarkin calls a staff meeting at 6am on a Tuesday. Does he talk about the security vulnerability the death star has been exposed to? No. He blusters about how everything is fine because his station is so cool and awesome and nothing bad will ever happen to it. Then some guy calls him wrong and an idiot to his face and tells his spooky wizard boss his religion is bullshit, and is instantly choked for it. No one is even shocked or offended by this, hell half of them are into it
It’s really funny how Mon Mothma in Andor is one of the most compelling and fascinating characters in Star Wars and then in basically any other piece of Star Wars media she becomes essentially a Hillary Clinton-shaped blob of platitudes
I just found out that apparently Tarkin had an affair with a stormtrooper????
Krennic: *having the absolute worst week of his life after his top secret emails got leaked*
Galen meanwhile on Eadu after adding that exhaust port:
I know Anakin's desilusions of grandiosity are the talk of the town, but something something Padmé dehumanization of herself as a result of so much survivor trauma and so many close death calls. She's the senator with the highest murder attempts on her, she gets assesination attempts weekly and brushes them off, and she keeps chasing for justice to the point of collition, she sees people dying around her all the time but she keeps on living and living, at some point she's flirting with death as much as Anakin does in the battlefield. And something something, Anakin, ironically, in his extreme trauma and fear of death taking the people he loves, being the only one to say "You're a person, and your name is Padmé, not queen nor senator, and you're as fragile as any other live being" Something something the irony that person that most adored her being also the one who saw her as a person Something something Anakin commiting atrocities not for a goddess, no for a politician no for royalty, for a person. Something something how contrarian it is, that Anakin sees himself as a weapon, and Padmé's extreme guilt becoming what seems like superiority.
And particularly here in this comic something something how easily Anakin can walk through that storm Padme has created, how easily he can enter into her headspace and she doesn't flinch, doesn't blink, she isn't even surprised because she expects him and he's the only one that knows and can reach her like this, they're just having a conversation, something something.
Something.
I swear this was the end of me, so idc if i'm rambling, this comic kept me up awake for more than one day, because the power would go out every single time i sat to work on it, damnit
i need to sleep asap, and eat, eating first probably
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Andor makes me want to write a Star Wars fanfiction but it's so scary. What if I write "Glup Shitto was sitting on the balcony, drinking coffee and reading his favourite book", but someone comments "didn't you mean he was drinking glop-goppy and reading a holo-journal? 🤨" so I open wookiepedia to check it out and it turns out that they also never invented balconies in the star wars universe and Glup Shitto can't read because of the freak accident he suffered in the episode 10 of the 2024 show "Jar-Jar and Babu Frik". What then.
Image description: it's a drawing of Ahsoka Tank from Star Wars. She looks adult, she's wearing a detailed headpiece with fabric hanging from it like a veil. She's looking off to the side (left) with an unimpressed look, her mouth is partly open, one of her eyebrows is raised. Her screen-right hand is held up to point at something off-camera that she finds offensive. There's no colors, it's just line-art. For context, the prompt was 'what if Ahsoka was Anakin's Master and she met him as a kid'. End of description.
ok what if, thanks to giving birth to two half-force/eldritch skywalkers, padmé wound up as a force ghost (but only said eldritch skywalkers could see her)
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John is too good for this world
another rogue one thing that andor finale adds to is orson krennic's Worst Fucking Week Of His Life. he's already overbudget and behind schedule. classified info leaked because security bureau apparently have dogshit personal operational security. the bureau chief just offed himself so there's no one to scapegoat. tarkin is trying to steal credit for his work. vader chokes him if he gets in a pissy mood. he hates his job and his job hates him. he's probably getting a pre-cancerous stress ulcer from all of this. the spemails (space emails) have not found him well.