I Would Like To Schedule A Murder.

So I'm taking an art class and we where doing counter balance in class and right when I was finished the professor comes over and tells me to add more colors like bitch i work in monochrome thers already 2 colors what more do you want from me so I add purple I finish the he come back around and tells me I need more color so now I add yellow and I'm thinking ok this is enough right it looks good no more but this bitch comes back around and tells me more colors you need warm colors like red or orange and I'm just sitting there like I have black blue purple and yellow isn't this enough have you ever heard of a color palette but no so I add the damn red and nowni hate it

I absolutely hate water color maybe if I had an instructor actually instruct it wouldn't be so bad but noooo

Hiding pride flags in my homophobic parents basement!part #1!

More a loose collection of thing that are secretly gay then actual pride flags.

So far they suspect nothing.

I have read the enter A Song of Ice and Fire series in the span of a week during finals in the world of readers I am a god

I no longer need to bow to the gods of wind in the morning to pacify the flying gremlin that live rent free at the foot of my bed for I have harnessed the power of the fucking sun and ascended to godhood myself the wind my try to nock me off my feet but even then it will only be giving me more power to burn anything that stands in my way to the ground these futel efforts to try and stop me will only fan the flames that control the gremlins around me-

at this point my family needs to just stop buying oatmeal or except that it comes with extra protein

i went to make oatmeal cookies only to realize that the oatmeal had bugs in it after I added the oats

finding like colonies of the almost microscopic bugs in specifically our oatmeal has become so comen that there like a 60/40 chance that any time I go to eat some their there and I normally don't find them until I've already made the thing and at a certent point you just go fuck it like your already eating when you spot the fucker at that point whats more gonna do

but my parents make stuff with oats all the time and almost never find them like are they just old and going blind or am I cursed

Ok so aperently this was a love scam thing that people usually pull on the elderly and my autistic ass just completely missed the mark trying to get us back on topic to the insurance thing he was supposed to be selling me that I don't qualify for like my mind was fully just "sir your a telemarketer, aren't you supposed to be marketing me something can we just get back to that so I can say no and hang up i don't know how to respond to you flirting with me when you refuse to take a hint" but also I mentioned being a 20 something college student what money do you think I have for you to scam to begin with if ither of us was gonna be asking for money it would have been me???

I never thought I would be proposed to by a telemarker but I guess sometimes things happen???

One second your trying to tell someone your too young for Medicare please stop calling the next they ask if your single then propose cuz your voice sounds nice? Only for it to end with them flirting for 10 minutes while trying to arrange a date from half way across the country.

I found a movie that looks like Harry potter but with talking dogs it's called the wizard of paws and this is my initial reaction completely unedited and also one hundred percent done with voice to talk because i'm lazy.

Evil, bad guy looks like stereotypical evil bad guy, no, really. The first scene is like 2 guys running around one in white and huddled over himself and the other guy all in black with greasy hair and half looking like a bad rip-off of Johnny Depp. But worse and living out of a trailer park yet somehow trying to look rich, just goes running after him while exploding trees, but if b. Really bad cgi, so the tree just kind of disappears.After he points a stick at it

This movie feels like it was made in nineteen 1999 with a budget in the negative

The script is so bad and forced It's almost funny

I had to look it up so I hit pause.But this movie is from 2014!!

The dog has yet to talk

The script makes it feel like this was written by a 10-year-old no, seriously, this moved. You feels half like someone's student film or like. Oh a family movie that somehow had special effects. But the special effectsIf it's a real movie kind of feel like, oh, you can tell whoever whatever production studio made this was just really poor

The dog is really cute.Ten out of ten would recommend specifically for ozzy, the dog

A third of a way through the movie and the main character finally has both a personality and emotions. Unlike the rest of the cast

THE DOG TALKS!

The child is now officially readable, he finds out he can use magic and just does it for his chores.

The small child bully looks like spike from christmas with the cranks.Except in like a black wife, beater with stains all over somehow

Dead good magician is very cryptic and half talks and riddles, but answers, no questions

Wait a second is only halfway through the movie. And the main character is not even half way through the movie, and the main character is already fighting up against the big bad guy and whitney.What?It's not even halfway through the movie.What do you mean

Mister tiny becoming tiny, is not my favorite

✨️Prestigitation✨️

There's an entire talentro arc, and that's fine, but I was not expecting the bully to have like two seconds of screenshot ing on screen or for it to immediately switch over to kids doing the cup song

Screw tinyThe dog does sarcasm.This is now my favorite

DOGGOS

Oh my godIs there a love story in here?These kids are like ten

There is no god stop it.Please let this just be a pure friendship.Friendship be this friendship

Why are ninety percent of the interactions in this movie?People being ablist to the fact that the main character is a service dog

Oh my god emotions, emotions, no, get away from me

¿¿¿¿Frog?????

Is the maiden? Is the main premise of this movie that the kid does magic at? Talentros, but is real magic. And has talking dog. What is this movie?

This movie with magic and a talking dog that is also magic is about a child. Entering a large talent show to win money, so they aren't evicted.

This movie with a talking dog, it's about a child going to a teletrow to save his house

Nevermind, maybe evil magician shows up at a talent show will update.

No don't leave whack a mole the child

BIG DOGGO

~the magic school busss~

Anti drunk driving psa ( is talking down the drunk driver? What's going to save his dad? No, no Sam was killed by evil magician, not drunk drivers. They explicitly showed evil magician.)

"The magic may be gone but the magic was inside you all along"

No no no you see the magic is dog

I was coming in second place in a talent show magic your dad back alive. There's only six more minutes they're not going to explain that

Never mind, they spend the next 6 minutes describing how him time-traveling and drawing talking down a drunk driver is. In fact, what saved his dad? It just took nothing another half of the movie for that, to process and the timeline. And it actually to work

who thought it was a good idea to have Hando Ohnaka the pirate in star wars miss-quote Roosevelt that's hysterical the quote was speak softly and carry a big stick but hando says speak solfty and have a big tank and it was from the clone wars

Was anyone gonna fucking tell me that 1 theres a fantastic 4 movie coming out but More importantly PEDRO PASCAL IS PLAYING REES RICHARDS !?!?! DOSE ANY ONE SEE THE PROVLEM .....No?!?!? Am I The ONLY One?!?!? PEDRO PASCAL IS TOO HOT TO PLAY REED HE SHOULD BE JOHNY AND THE GUY PLAYING JOHNY IS JUST DORKY ENOUGH FOR REED THOSE 2 NEED TO SWICH NOW!