This Is The Level Of Petty I Aspire To Be

I would like to add:

"Peter Johnson's here"

"Actually I'm 24"

"I killed her sister"

"I cut off her head"

"I was thinking more like shoving Nancy into the nearest dumpster."

"is there a Greek god of disappointment?"

"Are you stalking me??"

"oh no. you’re coming with me sunshine."

"I'm sorry." *Annabeth proceeds to shove Percy into the water

PLEASE the one liners are killing me

The past he's haunted by is flower husbands

jimmy solidarity they could never make me hate you

Wait until they find out about rugby

#help

if you knew me in year 7 and 8 please disregard everything you ever learnt about me

Remus Lupin ladies and gentlemen

OK now I need someone to do a minecraft fanart of Alex rejecting Steve or some shit

kids were roleplaying with minecraft figurines and one of them had their figure go up to the other and say “i’m in love with you” and the other one replied “sword slash to the chest. and you’re on fire”

And that, kids, is how I came to unironically ship PartyVan

Person A: James

Person B: Sirius

Person C: Remus

Person B: Dom or sub?

Person A: I guess Domino's, since I don't go to Subway that much. Don't see why you'd put them in the same category though

Person C: I'm gonna tell them

Person B: Don't you fucking dare

My favorite thing I've read today 😭

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.