I Can’t Stop Laughing

Pure lesbian gay solidarity

You know how in Percy Jackson? Athena just Vibes so hard with someone she makes a baby appear?

I think that would be hilarious.

"Hi, remember me? Yeah, we fought that World Ending Threat together. Shared Witty One Liners. You were hilarious and VERY Heroic, so was I, it was awesome. And, uhh... *awkward cough* It's a Concept?" *jazz hands*

"Meaning?"

"....I'm pregnant."

"WHAT!?!?!"

Like? Full on Lunch Box, gonna pop out of his body already a toddler, "I'm technically just carrying around a second core and the only physical sign it's happening is I am SUPER hungry and Hella tired", Super Heroics Weirdness Baby? A literal love child with Justice(tm).

But also one of the Bats.

Look, no one GAVE HIM the "you are a Protective Spirit, you gotta be careful who you Protect People With, lest you Vibe too hard and CREATE LIFE" talk! He didn't know that was A THING!

And he's not even mad? Inconvenienced? Yeah. Spooked. Absolutely. But, like? He already HAS a daughter? Dani. And he has literally his entire Rouge Gallery and all his Allies to help raise this lil menace. It's also not like it's gonna HURT. It's just... like someone handed him a chimpanzee and walked off. But worse because it's not a chimpanzee, its A CHILD.

He's kinda still buffering.

So... Now he's here to either set up a Co-parenting thing, threaten you for child support money, or too avenge himself upon you should this be some weird baby-trapping plot. Okay, now, does he or does he NOT... need to burn your house down?

Talk fast.

@hdgnj @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @lolottes @the-witchhunter @hypewinter @ailithnight @mutable-manifestation

Ghost Helpline part 11

Dick drove home in good weather(for Gotham). He had his phone pressed to his ear as he spoke with Clark, damn was B over thinking things again. “No Raven doesn’t work with the Titans anymore. After defeating Trigon we all agreed she deserved time to figure herself out I could call her but…”

He slowed the car when he came upon Drake manor a lump forming in his throat. He was sad to admit that he and Tim weren’t as close as before but surely he would have known if Tim was moving back into his old home? But there he was with Jason and Bart carrying boxes inside. He was an awful brother wasn’t he? How could he not know? Tim hated that place! He would never move back in unless-

He slammed the brakes as he got closer to the gate because that wasn’t Tim or Jason and that definitely wasn’t Bart.

“Clark I’ll have to call you back.”

— —- —-

Dick ran up the steps of the manor to the living room and was greeted with the sight of Jason pressing binoculars to the window. As Jon and Damian chatted animatedly about the new neighbors.

“Don’t be an imbecile Jon! The rich and elite do not move to Gotham unless they have something to hide!”

“All rich people have something to hide! You have something to hide! They sound like nice people!”

“Ha! So you are spying on them! What are they saying?”

Dick texted Wally as he spoke, “Everyone hold on a minute where is Tim?”

“Tt- who cares. That idiot has given away our location and put all of our identities at risk.”

“Or perhaps Master Tim have given us a grand opportunity to as you would say ‘pull a fast one’ on the media. After all excusing yourself to play with a wealthy neighbor is a good excuse to leave a boring gala. And a second pair of eyes to support your ‘accidents’ would be beneficial.”

“Tt- perhaps Pennyworth but see that I have no desire to befriend these intruders at all.”

“Mmm perhaps but either way the only way any of you will be getting information today will be to good neighbors and introduce yourselves. Thankfully for all of you I have prepared cookies as an opener.”

“Did somebody say cookies?”

Dick smiled, “Wally just in time !”

—- —- —-

Constantine was looking over the list of names Superman had handed him when the circle left on the floor began to glow. He took a long drag of his cig and felt like making a run for it.

It looks like their little helper had finished their end of the deal and found an antidote after all. John sighed he contemplated doing this exchange on his own but knew he’d be in for a lecture if he did so. From Zatanna and bats ugh.

Welp time to call the cavalry.

—- —- —-

Dick held the platter of cookies and took the lead, Jason deciding to stay home and watch in case they needed an extraction. Or more than likely to call Roy. Dick knew Jason had been dying to meet up with Roy since the dragon incident but hadn’t been able to yet. None of them had been able to relax now that Dick thought about it. Well it was fine, Dick smiled down at Wally, all this craziness would blow over soon.

The group of boys started their walk over to ex-Drake Manor. “Hhhuummhum ha ha,” Jon smiled.

“What?”

“Oh nothing Damian your new neighbors just seem really nice.”

Dick smiled, “Hey no spying alright we are just going to be two normal families making friends okay,” Dick gave a short pause, “So what they say?”

“Dick!”

“What now I want to know !”

Jon laughed, “They’re fighting over their sister.”

“Fighting?”

“Yeah apparently they all forgot to set stuff up for her and are running around blaming each other.”

Dick nodded, sibling were like that sometimes. Tho usually everyone at his house just ended up blaming Bruce.

They kept walking when they came upon the short fence dividing the land of the two well off houses. Two teens sat on the dead grass, surrounded by pieces of wood and metal. Dicks eyes surveyed the area, it didn’t look dangerous.

“God damn it Alcor! That’s not how you put a swing set together!”

“Well how would you know? And it’s not a swing set! It’s a whole cozy area for her you absolute shit head!”

Dick smiled right a swing set made way more sense. Well these boys seemed rather normal older than Damian by a few years but hey his little bro was very mature so-

“I’m going to turn you into fucking soup!”

Dick froze, okay so maybe not that normal.

“Fuck off I am trying to work!”

“Well I want to help why are you the only one that gets to build Princess something?”

“Maybe because I’m the only one that knows how to build stuff! Now get lost!”

Damian tsked under his breath, “Idiots.”

“Damian that isn’t nice, know let’s head over and introduce ourselves right okay.” Dick continued walking, he found it a bit concerning. Both of the teens had black hair and blue eyes. Hopefully his family wouldn’t scare them off.

The group approached the gate.

“Hello there, we’re Dick and Damian Wayne and these are our friends. It’s nice to meet you!”

The one dubbed as Alcor in Dicks head stood up and waved at them, “Oh hello, I’m Alcor and this is my brother Brett. We weren’t expecting company sorry for the mess.”

Damian held back a sneer, “Why ? Not expecting the party going Wayne family to be polite?” God did Damian hate fathers civilian mask.

Alcor frowned looking between all of them, “Ugh more like the fact that you guys live like five miles away from us? Did did you guys walk here?”

Dick smiled, “Oh you know daily exercise is good for you. We ugh brought cookies!”

Brett reached over the gate to grab them, “Nioce.”

“We hope you like them! They’re our favorite our butler Alfred makes them.”

The teens nodded together, alright then the type of rich where having a butler was normal then. Dick cataloged the info for later.

“Thanks,” Algor smiled, “I’ll go put these inside. Id invite you all inside but our dad’s asleep and our other brothers snuck out.”

“To Gotham?”

Alcor shrugged, “I’m sure they’ll be fine they wanted to grab food and stuff before the babies of the family get here.”

“Oh are they coming with your mom?”

“We don’t have a mom.”

“Oh Jezz I’m sorry.”

“No worries man.” Alcor turned and walked inside.

Dick coughed, “So I don’t suppose you need any help putting that swing together would you?”

“It’s not a swing,” Brett flushed, “I suppose if you’re volunteering.”

Dick hopped the fence with a grin, “Come on Wally let help the kid out.”

—- —- —-

The kid was right it wasn’t swing as much as it was a floating seat, a little nook facing the sun.

During the building Alcor came back out and pouted. On the upside he was the only brother willing to keep the small talk going.

“So does your butler make all of your guys food? The cookies are great by the way.”

“Yeah Alfred does a lot of stuff for us, why?”

Alcor shrugged, “I dunno just wondering like isn’t there supposed to be a lot of Wayne kids running around. There’s a lot of us and Dad practically makes all our food.”

Dick chuckled, “Yeah there’s a lot of us but we aren’t always home. It’s even rarer for us to all be home at the same time.” He felt himself shake off a bitter feeling, “Its nice that your dad makes time for you like that ours can’t even boil water haha.”

Alcors smile looked sad, “Yeah he’s great, we all love him a lot.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth!”

“Shut up Brett!”

Wally laughed, god Dick loved that laugh, “How many of you guys is there anyway? Cuz I gotta say my boyfriend sure does have a lot of siblings.” Wally elbowed Dick good naturedly.

“Oh I have nine siblings!”

—- —- —-

Konstelacio felt wobbly, eyes forced open. Her talk with Pandora and Ghost Writer had taken hours! Days? Time in the zone was weird. She was tired but trudged forward she needed to get this shit over with.

Konstelacio frowned to herself as she knocked on the Justice’s Leagues proverbial door, the circle. Pandora and Ghost Writer were always kind to her, they were phenomenal teachers but the constant pushing to make ally’s within her own species was beginning to annoy her. Living up to her position in ghost high society was already hard enough. Demons of her stature didn’t care about low born demons… well one did. One did but they didn’t talk much anymore, Konstelacio but at her lip. May be she should get back in touch with him?

The demon-lings head throbbed, the scar on her face felt numb. What is taking these heroes so long!!! Frustration made her head fell worse. She wanted to get this test over with. Because that what this had to be right both Pandora and Ghost Writer had left payment for the antidote up to her.

She was so screwed. Ask for something to small and look like a fool. Ask for something too big and risk the King taking interest, maybe even losing the Kings trust. She couldn’t think of anything to trade for, she needed something perfect. Something that wouldn’t seem like a disrespect to ALL parties involved.

Throb. Throb. Throb. Ugh! How many times did she use teleport? The circle began to open, she’d figure it out. She’d pass this test! She wouldn’t disappoint these people who gave her so much.

- Flash ran to grab as many prominent leaguers as he could as soon as he saw Constantine run out the door. He was not giving that British asshat a chance to do things alone with Zatanna and Batman. He trusted the trio…duo, he did! But he worried, half of the team was divided on whether the girl could be trusted or not. It made Barry feel awful, all he wanted to do was tell that girl to go home. To run away from this hero villain game for as long as she could. Honestly fuck child heroes.

Flash managed to be the last one in the room as the magician start at the circle up. This time there was little to no fanfare; no smoke, the fire around the floor comparable to a candle, and no ominous sounds. Konstelacio showed up with a ‘pop’ and nothing else. It was kinda disappointing.

Oh, oh. She does not look okay. Konstelacio leaned on her right side, covered in sweat, breathing through puffs, vibrating slowly. Except people who aren’t speedsters don’t vibrate… oh she’s shaking. Barry disappeared to grab a trash can. Please don’t be sick, please don’t be sick Barry repeated to himself.

“I got the antidote.”

“What no small talk this time Sheila ?”

“I told you not to call me that!” The demon snapped, her teeth became longer sharper. Digging in to her own lip, hands fisting at the hem of her dress. Names must be a sore subject with her Connor thought. It was understandable Connor had to work so hard to find his sense of self even without people screwing up his name, he got it he did but, “Please excuse Constantine he speaks to everyone that way … he’s British. It’s just slang. He isn’t using Sheila as a placeholder for your name.”

“Whatever,” it didn’t take a detective to see that the girl was on edge. She was on a short wick, Konstelacio was not as happy as she was the last time they had summoned her. They could only conclude that she wouldn’t be willing to be as kind as last time ether. Clark internally wondered if Captain Marvel had told her to be wary of them, if the captain no longer trusted the league as much as he always had. The notion made the invincible man sorrowful, and annoyed. Bruce needed to learn when to let things go.

Because Clark knew Bruce, knew that this was all stemming from his compulsive need to keep them safe. All of them safe including Marvel. No matter what the Bat said he knew the man cares about each and every one of them, even Hal. It was in the little things he did; Flash appreciation day, pulling extra monitor duty, asking Hal about space, answering Manhunters questions about earth sincerely. It was everything. At the end of the day Bruce was a man who cared but looking at the kid again really made it click. Bruce was probably worried about her too in his own messed up way. But if Batman didn’t let it go, if he didn’t stop- Captain Marvel would never forgive him for it.

“I found out what your mystery sickness is, congratulations you have a case of Vampire Fog.”

The league could see Zatanna and Constantine give each other a look. “And what exactly is Vampire Fog.”

“Uh uh uh no more freebies. Payment for both the information and the cure. Upfront.”

Oliver didn’t like this, but hey at least the kid had balls.

—- —- —-

Jon’s jaw dropped as he sputtered, “Ten! Ten kids!!” There were stars in his eyes, Damian’s hand keeping him from floating away. “Ten kids!”

“Yes that’s what he said Jon.”

“That’s so many! What are they like? Why did you all move to Gotham?”

Alcor laughed, “We all have our own thing I guess, they’re a pain but I love them. Two of our brothers are taking classes at the college in town and dad couldn’t bear to split us up for the whole summer.”

Dick frowned as he filed that info away, “Wait so are you guys only staying for the summer?”

“Yes.”

“Shut up Brett! It hasn’t been decided, but more than likely we’ll just be staying off and on for their classes or something,” Alcor shrugged.

Dick felt his communicator ping and if Wally’s body language was anything to go by so did his, “Well we should be getting out of your way. I can’t wait to meet the rest of you family sometime.”

“Likewise,” Alcor waved goodbye, “Good luck, hopefully we stick around long enough to see the wedding.”

Wally bursted out laughing at Dicks embarrassment, “I’ll be sure to invite you Alcor!”

“Brett to please- ouch what? You love weddings.”

The boys left as the brothers yelled at each other.

—- —- —-

Constantine sighed as he put his hand up to his head, the meeting about the little Sheila was going to be absolute Hell.

“Yo! John!”

His cigarette fell to the linoleum floor, “God damn it Boston!”

Writing Prompt: #1

As far as the other races are concerned “pinky promises” are super serious.

Tilda was crying, clinging to Thranduil’s robes.

Tilda: No! Your not allowed to leave!

Thranduil: Tilda please don’t cry I -

Tilda: But what if you die! What if you leave and never comeback!

Thranduil: Tilda sweetheart I promise to do all in my power to return as quickly as I can.

She extended her little finger out to him: Pinky promise

Thranduil: A what?

Tilda grabbed his hand gently wrapping her finger around his then shaking it: Now promise and it has to come true!

———

And Thranduil returned within the month.

Ghost Helpline part 3. Diana was shocked, hurt and elated all at once! “Your grandmother is Pandora?! I did not know that she even had a child! I am ecstatic to meet you Konstelacio. Oh my I call you cousin?” This was it! as far apart as the separation between Pandora and Themyscia may be Diana would take any family she could. The loneliness of childhood gnawed at her.

“Oh no! I’m not Pandoras Grandchild!” The girl crossed and uncrossed her arms into an X to show her dismissal, “She is a good mentor! And a wonderful family confidant! If anything she’s like my Nanny.”

Constantine began to sweat buckets.

Diana shouted, “Wait…is Pandora…” lips thinned.

“A ghost ? Yes”

- Tim stared at Konstelacio, she had begun to breathe deeply, averting her eyes from Wonder Woman, feet shuffling together. She was exhibiting shame. And Tim understood the feeling well, that you were too unworthy to even be held in comparison to someone else. Someone whose shoes you could never even dream of filling. “Do Demons have grandmas?” Uhhh speedsters.

“Yes”

“That’s so cool! Who’s yours?”

“I don’t know.”

Oh oh those golden eyes looked tired. As tired as Jason’s eyes had been after his first gala, Dick thought. They may have both been adopted but Jason was treated to so much contempt being from the streets, so much fake pity. /Oh poor kid doesn’t even know who his mom is./Dick knew Jason hated it all.

“I’m sorry!”

“It’s okay. It doesn’t matter.”

/It doesn’t matter Dick! Just drop it!/ the eldest robin frowned.

Damian tsked, “What about your parents? I would suppose even monsters need those? Also landing community service instead of some harsher punishment must mean you have some connection to authority in your ‘realm’ no?”

The little girl grinned, “Yes something like that.”

She has nearly everyone in the room duped, Constantine side eyed the Bats nearly. He knew that smile; a tad too wide eyes, a fraction to tight smile, the inexplicable about of understanding and kindness up until this point… this was the grin of a con artist.

- “I know quite a lot of important people! Why Pandora herself is my nanny! And my supervisor is my uncle.”

“Tsh- is that not a conflict of interest?”

“Doesn’t matter,” John wished he was allowed to smoke in space, “No more wasting time, now that we know you can help us what’s your price?”

“Hhhuuu what? Oh the price for the antidote will have to come later, after all you technically aren’t getting it from me. I’ll have to ask nanna and whoever else decides to help what the want. It’s only fair.”

“We see,” Batman’s low tone sounded. “And the dragon-“

Her hand stuck out shyly, “Tips are always welcomed tho…after all I am still providing a service.”

“We don’t …”

“It takes me a lot of energy and time to help you mortals so much. I’m so tired already.”

Batman’s mouth stilled, “We-“

A blur of red, “Oh are you hungry? Do you need anything? Let me get you a chair, snacks..”

“No no chair! Nothing is going threw that circle !” Constantine yelled, “Do you have any idea what could happen!”

“She’s a child!”

“She’s a demon!”

“Constantine is right.”

“Bats you can’t be serious, just look at her?”

“Flash we know your intentions are in the right place but we just can’t risk it! We also can’t risk not clearly defining what she considers a tip.” Zatanna signed how long have they been here, the girl looked harmless enough but something about her made her skin crawl.

“A favor would be nice! Especially from the red one!”

“See who knows what she could end up asking for.”

“Oh I see I’m sorry,” she looked down dejected, “ I do suppose no one carries favors for ladies around anymore hhhmmm and none of you have handkerchiefs? Awww”

“Why would you want something like that ?!?” Diana was horrified, her to be cousin was a child! No men, man, demon should be giving her favors to begin a courtship! “Flash!”

“Oh no no I wasn’t defending you to-“

“I know I know I just wanted one from you cuz you were nice to me.”

“That’s still doesn’t explain why you would ask for a favor as a tip?” Diana looked as the girl flushed in embarrassment. “I -I -I just want one to show my friends that’s all just to prove that I could get one that’s all! Uummmm cousin???” She hesitated regretful as soon as the word had come out.

“Oh I see are your friends giving you a hard time? Well I say the only one that would be appropriate to give you such a thing would be Robin… the youngest that is.”

The bats looked back at Damian oh dear lord sweat god don’t -

“Tch- here.”

Oh

Damian tossed a handkerchief towards the circle. “You just carry a handkerchief with you?” “Of course I do I’m not a heathen unlike you Drake.”

The toss was barely thrown in her direction when it disappeared entirely. “Where…”

“No worries I just put it in my inventory. Now then I’ll be on my way.”

“Wait!”

“Huh?” Big doe eyes blinked up at them all in confusion.

“The dragon! What about that thi- guy.” Hal scruffed out.

The girl brightened up, “Oh you don’t have to pay me anything for that! After all Aragon the one that broke his patrol. So I’m sure as soon as I send my report someone will come deal with it eventually.”

“Eventually?!” Hal’s hand hit the table, who was this kid?

“Well yes, tons of reports go in everyday! It is the INFINITE realms after all! Who knows when they’ll get to yours.” She shrugged as if it was all just a matter of convenience as if that very dragon haven’t terrorized and destroyed lives throwing its tantrum.

Superman chewed his lip, as this meeting contributed to drag on he had no doubt Aragon would continue to destroy everything in its path. “Wait what about your connection, surely you know someone that can help ? What about your supervisor uncle ?” Clark needed this to stop, he couldn’t even land a punch on this guy. Nothing worked and he was already weak to magic. This has to stop.

“Well I suppose I can but it’ll cost you.”

“Wait just a minute!”

“Do we even have anything you want?” Clark raked his mind over ideas in his head, for a tip all she had wanted was a handkerchief an old school way of showing off to her friends like any normal girl. “We don’t have much but I’m sure we could think of something???”

“It’s okay Mr. Superman.” Konstelacio lite up “I’ll just take something you mortals don’t really think about hhhmmm something small.”

Hal sighed as he leaned back, “You sure we can’t just give her a dog?”

“Ugh fuck this mate I need a light,” forget not being allowed to smoke up here all these idiot we’re getting on John’s last nerve, “Ugh drat! I could have sworn I had my lighter in my pocket.”

“Oh you mortals losing things in your own pocket. Oh that’s what I want in return!”

“A lighter? Smoking is -“

“I want your pockets.”

“What do you mean?”

The devil grinned, “Your pockets, empty them.”

#@starkcravingmad

Omg these little shits would have so much fun with it too!!

Fanfic writers to your keyboards!!!

Tag me I beg of you XD

Due to a series of general shenanigans, the JL come to believe that Phantom and Captain Marvel are divorced. (This is mostly because Black Adam and Pariah Dark were actually married, but that’s a story for later.) Now, as Captain Marvel is obviously very lonely and glaringly single, they’re trying to get the two back together. These actions have consequences.

Absolutely love it!!!! So cute!!!

Ecto-Parfait

Okay. I made one. This came into existence because of a conversation in the comment section in this little blurb:

I'm tagging @firedemongaming and @elvesandlanterns in this as well because I figured you two would like this and were a part of the convo that birthed my slightly sentient parfait.

Batman being autistic, assuming Captain Marvel is also autistic and responding kindly.

have i or anyone else expressed the idea that billy just says out of pocket things like normal children do, especilly as captain marvel?

like he'll be in the watch tower and he'll be like ".. mr. batman what's your favourite dinosaur? My favourite is a stegelosauris with all those plated spikes."

or like

"Hey flash what's your third favourite color?"

Freddy (not thinking): he’s not my father !

Hal (not buying it): uhhuh you ran out of ideas “junior”

Freddy: Im the wizards son! Not the champions!

Hal (buffering): oh .. OH! 😥

Freddy: yeah so after he got chosen we started dating

Hal: so after your dad died

Freddy (eyes rolling): yeah that to

Hal: oh

Proceeds to accidentally start a huge rumor about how they both fought for the Champion position and the wizards son lost. Legit sounding like Romeo and Juliet

The rest of the family showing up, not at all looking blood related to each other. They are heard to be “sharing” the champions power.

Hal and Barry gossiping watching it all. And the plot thickens!

Freddy and Billy have been dating for a year now but the justice league think they’re father and son. This is my take on how the JL found out that they were definitely not father and son.

Billy looking for Freddy after a rough battle: Junior! Where are you?!

Freddy who took a hit but can still stand: Cap, I’m over here.

Billy running to see his boyfriend: Are you ok? Are you hurt anywhere?!

Freddy taking Billy’s hands so they cup his cheeks: I’m fine.

Billy relived: *kisses Freddy*

Hal in the back: WHAT THE FUCK!!

Billy and Freddy: What?

Hal: What?! What do you mean What?! You can’t go around kissing your son Cap!

Billy disgusted at the thought: No we’re not—

Hal: Like I get it, you guys are ancient gods but that’s not an ok thing to do in the present!

Billy becoming impatient : Can I please talk—

Hal ignoring him: Maybe it was normal back then but it’s not acceptable now!

Billy: HE’S NOT MY SON!!! Gods where did you get that idea?

Hal:…he’s not?

Billy and Freddy: NO!

Hal: I just thought since he’s Cap junior that he’s your son.

Freddy: No we just ran out of ideas with the hero names.

Hal:…So you two are dating?

Billy: Yeah, we’ve been together for a year.

Hal:…Forget I said anything then.

Freddy: Gladly!

The nana in question needs to be Sams Grandma!!!

Damian didn't mean to. But looking at the horror on Batman's face, he also knows it doesn't matter.

Someone had managed to sneak up on him, immediately after a fight.

Damian, exhausted and wounded and ever so slightly drugged by fear toxin, reacted.

He'd spun around and run his katana through the attacker-but it wasn't an attacker. It was a civilian, who was staring down at the sword in his chest with a stunned expression.

The civilian looked up, blue eyes meeting Damian's through the mask.

"I was just..." The man trails off, dropping the first-aid kid he'd been carrying.

Damian knows his time as Robin is over.

Danny, on the other hand, can already feel his healing factor trying to kick in, and just needs to figure out how to convince Robin to remove the Katana so it can work without letting Batman know he's a meta.

Okay but that means Batman and the rest seeing the Adam video are suddenly hit bumpy the fact that Mavel was being GENTLE!!!!

Also superman (who hasn’t been hugged yet for whatever reason) hit with the feeling of empathy because in a world made of paper Adam is probably the only person Marvel can hug like that!!!

Marvel’s a Good Hugger.

He really is. Like he’s the go to guy for hugs. More than a couple times, he’s hugged someone with daddy issues and they’ve broken down crying.

Marvel and GL: *hugging*

GL: *sniffles*

Marvel: *pauses and looks down in confusion* “What was that?”

GL: “Nothing.” *sniffles again*

Marvel: “You sure…?”

GL: “Yeah. Shut up- yeah.”

Marvel: “…Okay…?”

GL: *pulls away after a bit, rubbing his eyes*

Marvel: “Are you crying?” *sounds super concerned*

GL: “No! No I’m not!”

There’s also the fact that Marvel’s a nice eight feet tall so almost everyone comes up to his chest. So, when he gets particularly giddy and happy…

Marvel: *Bouncing around super happy, hugging Batman*

Batman: *one side of his face is smushed into Marvel’s chest. His feet aren’t even touching the ground*

Robin!Tim: *videoing the entire thing*

Batman: *just resigned to his fate*

This video was passed around the other sidekicks, then their mentors and that’s how Bruce ended up getting teased by Flash and GL for the rest of the week.

Then, just for Adam specifically…

Marvel: *with a smile on his face, hugging Adam spine crushingly hard*

Black Adam: *punching, kicking, and overall just flailing to him to get him off*

Marvel: *unfazed up until Adam gets him in the eye and he lets go*

Black Adam: *slightly heavy breathing because he felt his lungs being compressed*

This clip goes viral and Batman’s just thinking of all the times Marvel’s hugged him and how easy it could’ve been for Cap to do him like Bane did. Meanwhile, people are wondering why the Captain was hugging his archenemy so tightly.

Also, just randomly, a YJ member will yell:

M’gann: “Group hug!”

And everyone will just rush to hug Marvel. It’s not even really a group hug too. They’re only really hugging Billy. And the thing is, these kids will brawl each other to get there first. Tim would pull a Robin from Teen Titans Go and swing his staff at one of Wally’s legs. Of course, he wouldn’t break it, he’d just trip him, but still. As for why they brawl for it? Whoever gets there first gets the full extent of Cap’s hug. Everyone else gets it to a lesser extent since they either have to sort of dog pile or hug around the person who got there first.