Me, Starting Enchante: Okay I'm Here For Some Best Friend Pining Let's Go

episode 1 // episode 12

pran: being super annoying to each other is our love language and i don't know how to act when you are being super sweet, i am flustered okay because your actions are kinda really really love-shaped

( I hope you tell that person how you feel ) — SO NOT WORTH IT, episode 11 🌈

Still2gether Ep3 + text posts

Ep5 Ep4 Ep2 Ep1 Pt6 Pt7 Pt8 Pt9 Pt10 P11 P12

The toxicity of fandom + BL

Toxic Fans are invasive. These type of viewers believe they have ownership and ‘deserve’ certain things not only from the content itself but also from the actors beyond the confines of the show.

This type of fan isn’t fictional. They exist in almost every fandom but particularly in the BL fandom, especially on sites like Twitter (and some even linger here on Tumblr).

Lovely Writer is exposing the pressure these kind of fans and viewers put not only on the production companies but the actors or artists themselves.

As a fan of a show, we have no right or claim to an actors personal life and yet, for some reason, built into the culture of the BL fandom is this bizarre sense of ownership and control over the actors and who they choose to interact with. This component of the fandom is so pervasive that it affects how a show or program is promoted and the expectations it puts on the actors and creative team to create moments of ‘skinship’ and reasons to ship the pairings together. It seems like this is the only type of media that so heavily relies on what occurs when the camera ‘stops rolling’ to promote the shows which puts unfair pressure on the actors and sets them up to endure uncomfortable situations.

The bottom line is that, as viewers, we need to understand that the actors are doing a JOB. They are being PAID to sell a product, which in this case, is a pairing, but we must understand that we have no claim to their personal lives. These shows are FICTIONAL and yet drama and judgment has bled so often beyond the outlines of the shows and promotions that these actors are forced to participate in because of their contracts. Friendships have been ruined, relationships tainted and some performers have even left the entertainment industry completely due to harassment from fans.

The fact that this show has been made is a lesson to make it DIFFERENT and show a fictitious example of what it is like for the actors in this industry. As fans, we have no right to actor’s personal lives. Actors do not ‘owe’ us anything. Ever. Period.

When Pran said "You've got to stop doing this to me. We are not a thing" on the rooftop, I found the English translation a little confusing. The first sentence makes it sound like Pran is asking Pat to stop being clearly romantic with him because it's hurting him, but the second sentence makes it sound like he's telling Pat to stop being clearly romantic because it's not appropriate to the kind of relationship they have, without any romantic feelings on Pran's part. Can you shed any light on what exactly Pran was trying to communicate?

Oh certainly.

This was one of my favorite parts because they used super subtle language rather than the usual Thai words for couple (which I can't spell but can now recognize) or faen.

The first bit is Pran saying basically:

"I've had enough. Stop jerking me around, emotionally. You've been flirting on and off with me for years and it's not fair. Because i know what's going on and how I feel about you. And I kind of always have since the pond incident."

The second bit is:

"It's not fair of you, Pat, to do these kind of things to me (possession, jealousy, casual affection, flirting) without you, Pat, having actual romantic feels for me. (And acknowledging them.)"

Pran thinks Pat is being casual with him. But Pran is not a casual person. This is about sincerity. 

I think Pran also thinks that Pat hasn't acknowledged his own feelings to himself yet. Remember, they have known each other a very long time. And Pran is a lot more self aware than Pat is (and he also knows that). I think he realizes that Pat is a little in love with him but Pran believes that Pat will never come to place where he can admit that to HIMSELF.

Thus the kiss is a real shocker to Pran, because he didn't think it would ever happen. And it's not that he thought Pat didn't have the guts, or wasn't action orientated, it's just that he didn't think Pat would ever have the level of self awareness required.

Pat grew up in the course of one episode, if I were Pran, I'd be surprised too.

----

As an IRL example, it's not quite the same thing but...

You ever have that friend who is clearly queer but just isn't yet?

So they aren't pretending, it's not even self delusion, because they just don't realize it. Sometimes it's family background, but sometimes it's just that they are too emotionally young. They haven't figured themselves out. How can they when they haven't had the right life experiences yet? They aren't to be blamed or pushed because of this. It's a void not a wound.

As friends (or sometimes family members) I think we often see queerness in the people we love before they see it in themselves. (Especially if we are a little older and already out.)

Because we, personally, aren't dealing with the guilt, shame, fear, loss, and rebuilding of identity that society's expectations place on our friend's way of thinking about themself. (Even if we've been through it, it's different for everyone, and we can easily forget because we want to.)

Even if the friendship group or family is accepting, it can be super hard. Because then there is a whole new set of expectations to come up against.

When analyzing Color Rush, I mentioned that no one really talks about how first love as a queer person is also a grieving process. (And anger: why must we grieve as we experience passion for the first time when the hets don't have to?)

Because as we open the closet door and walk into a queer identity we mourn the dead straight identity we left behind.

----

Which is a long way of saying, what we see on this rooftop with Pat & Pran is first love and new passion, but it is also grief.

secret (nanon's cover)

I love that Shi Lei is doing this Evil Plotting in his room about how he wants Yu Zhen to... ask for help.

Yep.

Ask for help.

That's his evil plan.

His diabolical plot.

He wants Yu Zhen to ask for HELP.

So they can help him.

... I love Shi Lei on so many levels, okay?

It's weirdly pleasant to be able to hug you like this. You used to hug me a lot. It's not the same—you were just a friend back then. So, what am I now?