Omg Guys I Finally Won Tumblr

Must a movie be good? Isn't it enough just to watch a pretty disaster of a man in a loving domestic gay partnership with a ravenous alien goo?

Some people 🧑‍🤝‍🧑 have even gone to the hospital 🚑, claiming 🙋 that they encountered🚶 Silly 😜 Bones 🦴while fishing 🎣. Don't let his funny name fool you 🙅, this creature has an appetite 🦛 for punching 👊 people 🧑‍🤝‍🧑.

Pride Month is over it's time to return to my little hole under the bridge with the little orange troll from Dora and Mariah Carey

*voice that I think is my inside voice but in fact carries throughout a room without my consent* MY DEAR FRIENDS, colleagues, comrades in arms, the kind young woman who helped me when I got hopelessly lost in the MRT yesterday: GOOD MORNING! Can you believe it? It is half way through November and nearly December and Christmas!

This is a friendly yet forceful reminder, that Alex Rider - against all odds still a teenager, has killed approximately 15 people and made terrible puns about it but still mourns his late maths homework, proud wearer of frosted tips like a hacker in a 90s movie, rode a horse he hated into a train tunnel after a girl he also hated - once escaped a fake private school in which a clone of a megalomaniacal neo-Nazi had been surgically altered to look like him, RETURNED TO THAT SCHOOL to flush out said neo-Nazi, and later got a Facebook friend request from the clone and rejected it BECAUSE HE DIDNT REMEMBER WHO THEY WERE.

It’s been tough recently, so let us take this specific Alex energy with us into December and the new year: let us never give up a fight -I believe that we can gather ourselves and go back and this time with a fucking snowmobile. Our crisis haircut doesn’t define us, even when our friends lie and say it’s ok. Most importantly it’s always justified to refuse a Facebook request from a weirdo who we don’t remember spouting rubbish.

Imagine being CaliforMIA. Like, straight up missing in action. Lowkey addition by subtraction.

Yeah, I'm a simp.

S-quirrels

I-n

M-y

P-ants

Still so confused about what Eddie and Venom were doing in NWH. Like, the spell called everyone that knew Peter Parker was Spiderman. But Eddie was lost so he didn't know. The only other thing that would make sense would be that Venom knew and I honestly can't fit that together in my brain. And yes, I know it was just a ploy to get Venom into the MCU. Yes, I know there are a lot of other plot holes with NWH, but it just doesn't make sense and yet it still felt so purposeful.

I think Venom 2 is so multifaceted because from one perspective it's just a Segway to insert Venom into the MCU and therefore insert him into No Way Home. From another perspective it's a gay romantic comedy about a man and his hot monster partner eating bad guys while also trying to maintain domestic balance. And that's beautiful to me, just let them be happy :)

Bleeding profusely from the head while also still having perfect aim to make that final poetic shot 😩

“Resources for writing realistic injuries” no. I want to beat my characters to shit and I don’t care where the blood they’re coughing up is coming from. Like in anime.

Your reblogs are how I know you're still alive