If You Think About It…. The Acronym KYS Isn’t Saying “kill Yourself,” It’s Saying Kill Your

girl: ahh i've just been dealing with a lot y'know? it's like the world wants me dead haha

me (completely stonefaced): i will be your shield

her: what?

"I'm So Scared Of Losing People" "But Who's Scared of Losing You?"

I Bet On Losing Dogs - Mitski/Punisher - Phoebe Bridgers/little weirds - Jenny Slate/Not A Lot, Just Forever - Adrainne Lenker/@stuckinapril/Unknown/Unknown/Teenage Dream - Olivia Rodrigo/Tolerate It - Taylor Swift/what I could never confess without some bravado - Emily Palermo/The Prophecy - Taylor Swift/@tryworks/Footnote - Conan Gray/you say you don’t want a boyfriend, but you know that’s not true - Charlotte Green/Liability - Lorde/Unknown/@robertszombie/Demi Moore - Phoebe Bridgers/Mirrorball - Taylor Swift

kinda fucked up that im not a tv show character or like a 14 year old's oc Because i would've been really really good at that

So many modern detectives have tried to emulate Sherlock Holmes, and none of them have even come CLOSE to touching Benoit Blanc. That man is Holmes' true spiritual successor. He's a silly little guy. He's gay. He's a drama queen. He has impeccable fashion sense. He loves music. He works with the cops but refuses to work for them. His voice is both goofy and incredibly fun to listen to. He sucks at playing Clue and Among Us. He mopes in the bathtub for weeks when he doesn't have a case. He loves hanging out with The Girls but gets incredibly uncomfortable when women flirt with him. The only reason he can afford his gorgeous downtown apartment is because his husband works a real job.* The only thing he hates more than Rich Assholes are Stupid Rich Assholes. He solved a double (attempted triple) homicide and the thing that made him most upset was plagiarism. He supports women's rights and women's wrongs. He refuses to break the law himself but actively encourages his client to commit arson.

And, most importantly, he and Holmes would fucking love each other. If most of the modern day detectives inspired by Holmes ever met him, he would probably want to kill them with hammers, but he and Blanc would probably end up being penpals and sending each other newspaper clippings about crime or some shit. And I can absolutely envision a teenage Blanc reading the Holmes stories and being like, "Wait, being a silly little gay private detective is a viable career option? Well, I guess I've finally found my calling in life."

Anyway I love the Benoit Blanc movies and I hope they make a million of them

*confirmed by Rian Johnson

Having to clean the shower is so fucking annoying. It’s clean in there. That’s where I go to get clean. It’s clean dude trust me. Stop fucking growing bacteria and stuff man this is the clean locale. You’re embarrassing me in front of the sink

aquarium advertisments say stuiff like discover the longtooth grouper this friday

“nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”

damn you must suck at cooking. check out some youtube tutorials man. i believe in you.