MOTHER STANDS FOR COMFORT - KATE BUSH

and what if i dropped my hyperfixation-induced ethan hunt character study from last year….? what then?

── 𝖒𝖔𝖗𝖌𝖆𝖓 ( 22, she/her )

current fixations : the mentalist, frieren, warrior cats

main fandoms : lost, the x-files, mission impossible, resident evil, outlast, the brian jonestown massacre, mysterious skin, the haunting of sunshine girl

♡ asks are always open !

woke up at 3am and the first thing on my mind was marius josipovic. i fear there may never be a funnier character alive mostly bc of his perpetual irritation. the way it flares up so dramatically, you can just see it in his face. or his eye rolls??? JESUS that man can do an eye roll it's hilarious. the annoyed ass tone he gets, his lil accent slipping through. he really gets sooo upset that this fucking person ( carly ) whose family he's conning won't be his friend. what type of fucking conman tries to befriend someone who's going to be completely useless to their con. it's so funny because he really desperately tries to get on her good side, even apologizes and asks if they can start over, and presses the issue until she smiles?? his compassion for other people is actually insane considering he lies and cheats and steals, like at his core he shouldn't care, but he does, and that's what makes him stand out to me so much. i think he has the capability to emotionally remove himself from situations and other people, but when his empathetic nature hits, it's difficult to remain as unaffected as he tries to be. and something so fucking sad to me is that, for the first time in his life, marius feels welcome and at home when he goes to con the bernhardts. he feels like he has a family, because he's welcomed with open arms and there's not an inch of distrust there. which is so different from his own family - esp with his brother, who he genuinely can't trust bc eddie is actively trying to screw marius over to save himself! so to have these people who he actually somewhat trusts and who trust him in return? i think that's life changing.

and there's this scene with carly where marius mentions the bernhardts being a normal family and carly is like. normal family? and marius acknowledges that they may not be completely normal, and that's that. but to him, this is what a family should look like. a type of family he never got to experience, so of course this is normal for him. he even says this after learning about some of the fucked up things that have happened in the past and continue to go on between these people, knows about the strained dynamics, but it's still enough for him to feel safe. i think marius might be his most normal when he's with julia, shows her what he can do, but the thing is, he doesn't even think about it. he just does it, because he feels safe enough to. literally exposes himself as a fantastic liar, somewhat admits he's in deep with some bad people. and he did this all without a second thought, didn't even think, maybe i shouldn't show this person what i'm capable of when i'm about to con them. he even willingly comes back to save her life when he already told her it's best to run away from danger. she sees this as cowardice while marius just sees it as survival. which really shows the different experiences they've had in life. and yet, all the same, they bond and they work well together and they enjoy each others' company. like, genuinely. and that's something completely new for marius because he doesn't do bonding. the friends we see him have are old friends, people he's known for years. making friends ... it's not something he's interested in doing, but here, with the bernhardts, he just. subconsciously does that. sure, we can say he may need to bond with these people bc they literally think he's their cousin / family, and if he's going to be let into the family secrets, he has to be close to them. but there's no doubt in my mind that's not what's driving marius here. none of this behavior is calculated, he's not bonding or attempting to bond with them because it's the smartest thing to do. he's doing it because he fucking wants to. and that is just so interesting to me because marius knows better than to get attached, he's a seasoned fucking criminal, and yet...

and after he sees his own brother betray him?? marius doesn't even get mad, even when he would never do that to eddie, he doesn't get angry. i just don't think he's quick to anger, ever. irritation? yes. but not anger. and he can be a genuinely kind and understanding person, especially when it comes to people's emotions and motivations, like... he doesn't judge others for that. even if he doesn't feel the same way, even if it's something he would never do, he can empathize. at his core, marius is a sweet and warm person, but his entire life he's been molded into a criminal, a con artist. i'm sure he had to steal as a kid to help feed himself and his brother, because while we get very little information about he and eddie's childhood, it's clear to see that their mom wasn't a good one. and she was incredibly young. marius was always the caring older brother, always did everything he could to protect eddie, enough to where it's shaped him into who he is today. and he doesn't even resent that. he'd do it again in a heartbeat, and he does. his priority will always be the people he cares about, but when he cares about his brother and the bernhardts, who he has to steal from to protect his brother, what then? it's such an interesting dilemma and the writers just ... did a fantastic job of setting it up. this show, at least the first season, really is insanely well written and acted. giovanni ribisi is genuinely perfect as marius. and it's so funny because no one else i've showed this series to has liked it, but i just!! god i fucking adore it. i could write a fucking dissertation on it, about the fox metaphors, about marius and why he is the way he is, about VINCE?! fuckkk he's a great antagonist. there's just so many amazing characters in this show and i truly find myself liking every single one of them. that's rare. so, sneaky pete? you have a fan for life. will i ever finish s3? probably not but s1 goes so fucking hard and i'm never going to get over this story. also honorable mention, marius thinking anything spiritual is a scam is sooo interesting of him. he's such a skeptic. i love him. anyway. back to bed i go

Psych (2006 - 2014) ⏤ 6.15, True Grits

that post-high moment when you realize there’s no one else to talk about bjm with, it’s not the 90s anymore, you’ll never get a cassette of the original pol-pot’s pleasure penthouse, “fade” will most likely forever be a lost track, and dig! is an 18 year old documentary on a band that no one cares about. why do i always do this lol. i think dead/obscure fandoms just call to me. perhaps it is the universe’s way of punishing me. what did i do in my past life to deserve this

i’ve decided to make a list of things that people will never love/appreciate as much as i do, just so no one else wastes their time. you’re welcome

the brian jonestown massacre

brian lackey

lost

fox mulder

ghost adventures

mysterious skin

scaretheater

sneaky pete

theon greyjoy

the haunting of sunshine girl

air bud

there you go i hope this helped

FANDOM LIST

a compiled list of all the fandoms i am in, or at least the media i enjoy. will most likely be updated every now and then.

television !

lost

dexter

the x-files

mr. robot

the umbrella academy

game of thrones

psych

sneaky pete

the walking dead

lucifer

daredevil

sherlock

heroes

the haunting of sunshine girl

band of brothers

criminal minds

fargo

merlin

prodigal son

bates motel

the finder

moon knight

misfits

movies !

mysterious skin

rocketman

zodiac

love & mercy

into the wild

the batman

harry potter

lord of the rings

the goldfinch

donnie darko

marvel

how to train your dragon

the truman show

it

air bud

the conjuring

the shining

pink floyd: the wall

zootopia

knives out

music !

the brian jonestown massacre

pink floyd

pearl jam

nirvana

wych elm

the beach boys

eyedress

led zeppelin

counting crows

sleepy sun

elton john

video games !

outlast

resident evil

phasmophobia

minecraft

the sims

youtubers !

coryxkenshin

izzzyzzz

barely sociable

scare theater

nexpo

kurtis conner

avnj

blameitonjorge

mamamax

nickisnotgreen

berleezy

sarah z

au where shadowsight finds scourge's ghost and together they rebuild bloodclan because fuck the clans

phewwwww me when one plotline nearly ruins the entire show for me ... sucks because god damn i've been loving the mentalist but this is a genuine comfort watch and i do not want to be sidetracked with dumb writing decision bullshit that only serves to piss me off !!! idek how i'm gonna go into season five. even the thought of continuing is unappealing and for a show that has been keeping my lonely ass entertained ... this sucks!