Hey Do You Know What Upsets Me?

Hands up! 2/2

Jack/ZhaoZi soulmate au

Everyone had soulmate words tattooed somewhere on their body. They were the first words that you would ever hear your soulmate say. Due to this, they were beheld with a certain degree of importance. Society loved the idea of soulmates, frowning on those who rejected or ignored their soulmate marks. Those who were born without marks were often outcasted, viewed as unloveable.

Zhao Zi always trusted his grandma. She had said that his soulmate would be someone who could care and provide for him. Because of this he paid no real attention to his words, preferring to judge his soulmate by their character than by their first words like the romantic he is. This was regarded as unusual. Words were so attached to emotion that Zhao Zi’s indifference often shocked people.

“Why should I pay so much attention to my words?” He had asked when one of his coworkers pointed to the neat letters across his collar bones. “I’m going to meet them wether I like it or not. It’s not like our first exchange is going to determine the whole relationship”. His wisdom made sense and after that people stopped asking.

It was perhaps lucky that he didn’t take his words seriously. Who would have the words “Can I have a bite?” tattooed on their person. Zhao Zi just assumed that his soulmate was a foodie like him. Besides, he could have gotten worse. His best friend, Shao Fei had the word “No” stamped on the back of his neck. It had been the warning of a bad relationship which had lasted for four years before Shaofei and Tangyi got their act together and confessed.

The whole thing had given Zhao Zi way too many heart attacks and emotions. And whilst their relationship was finally healthy with Tang Yi out of prison, they were so lovey dovey that even Zhao zi felt awkward. He genuinely considered himself a happy go lucky type of guy, trying not to let himself get down too often. When his parents left, he was okay because he had his wonderful grandmother. But when his grandmother died, it was Shao Fei who had kept him together. Although he was happy for his friend, he couldn’t help but feel an increasing sense of loneliness and disillusion with the world. His boss’s and AZi’s betrayal had been the icing on the cake.

More and more Zhao zi had found himself alone in his little house eating the type of unhealthy dinners that his grandmother would have hated. It seemed that with every passing day, his house only seemed to get bigger in its emptiness. Not that he let it show. At work he was as cheerful as ever, ignoring the new boss’s scoldings and the comments from the international division. No one noticed if he wasn’t eating as much as usual, or doing any more random acrobatics. He was fine.

So why was he stuck doing another weird undercover?

“Why do I have to be the stripper?” He complained, more like whined, to Shao Fei. They were back stage of the dingy strip club called the blue rose, the floor sticking to their shoes as they blinked in the terrible lighting. ZhaoZi was wearing knee length shorts with a see through white shirt and a stupid police hat. Shao Fei was dressed in a bright pink jacket on top of casual clothes. ZhaoZi had never wanted to swap clothes more.

“Because you’re the only one who can do anything acrobatic”, Shao Fei responded. “And the target likes boys like you anyway. We’ve been trying to get this guy for months Zhao Zi. Please? I’ll owe you”. Zhao zi sighed. He was too nice.

“You’re mean ah Fei”, he pouted, tugging the police cap lower over his hair. Shao Fei grinned, the cute act never worked on him anymore. “Yeah yeah”, he replied. “I’ll have Tang Yi make you some home cooked food. Now I’ve got to go, wait for your signal”. He patted Zhao Zi on the shoulder before disappearing out on to the club floor, leaving Zhao Zi alone backstage.

Trying to quell his nerves, Zhao Zi went over the case in his mind. They had several leads from a murder of a prostitute pointing towards the known gangster and sex trafficker John Smith. It was not his real name of course, but it was what he was known by. The guy had so far evaded them but a source had placed him in the club on routine occasions. Zhao zi just had to get him to lower his guard.

After a while, Shao Fei’s voice came across coms, alerting Zhao Zi of his cue. Gathering his courage, he ducked out on stage. He was glad of the lighting, obscuring most of the watchers from view. The target was visible in the corner, watching him. Zhao Zi shivered and bent forward into a front flip. Grasping the pole with his legs, he pulled himself upwards. Ignoring his surroundings, he concentrated on his dance, spinning around the pole with his body contorted in different ways.

When the que came for them to surround the target, Zhao Zi felt a flood of relief to be away from the blinding lights. He could feel his shirt sticking to him under the heat of the lamps and practically hopped off stage. Trying to keep up his cover, he strutted across the disgustingly stricken floor towards where the target was sat leering at him as the rest of his squad slowly surrounded him.

He didn’t notice the man on the table next to the target until he leant forwards and grabbed Zhao Zi’s wrist. Surprised, he turned to be greeted by dark red hair and a Cheshire Cat grin. The man’s eyes glittered at him as his lips stretched wider. “Can I have a bite?” He asked and instantly Zhao Zi could feel his words heat up across his collarbones. Deciding to deal with the target first, he shook off the hand and held out his badge. “Hands up! You’re under arrest!”

Luckily none of the men resisted and they had them out of the club and into the police van easily. Deciding to let Shao Fei and the others deal with the formalities, Zhao Zi hung back, now nicely wrapped up in his coat. Footsteps alerted him to an approach and he glanced up to face the red haired guy from the club. The lighting hadn’t done him justice. Now, in the light of a nearby street lamp, the guy was handsome and lean. Zhao zi couldn’t help Looking the guy over. Wow! His muscles!

The guy grinned and held out a gloved hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jack”. Zhao Zi returned his grin and shook his hand. “Oh you’re my soulmate. Hi! I’m Zhao Li An But everyone calls me ZhaoZi”. The guy’s hand was nice and warm through the glove.

Jack’s grin morphed into a smirk as he looked Zhao Zi slowly over, from his head to his toes then back up to his eyes. “So, can I have a bite?” ZhaoZi frowned in confusion. “Are you hungry? I wasn’t able to grab lunch and I’m starving but all the shops are shut now”, he saddened at the thought of his pitifully empty stomach.

“You got any food at your place? I can cook for you if you want”, Jack offered. ZhaoZi beamed, grabbing Jack’s hand excitedly. His grandma was right! He couldn’t be more in love. “Really? Then I want egg, and ham, and noodles with chicken broth and orange juice...” listing off all the food he had been craving, ZhaoZi couldn’t help but bounce a little on his feet. “Well I’ll cook for you. Come on”, Jack said as they began walking down the street. Calling a quick bye to Shao Fei, Zhao Zi turned his attention to his soulmate.

“Grandma said you would be a good cook”, he remarked as they turned a corner. “She said that my soulmate would be able to cook and provide for me”. He watched Jack grin. “That I can do”, he stated.

““My grandma also said that you will stay”. Zhao Zi looked up at Jack, face anxious but hopeful. He didn’t want to lose anyone else. “Will you stay?”

He watched as Jack’s face lost its grin, becoming honest. “If shorty asks then I will stay”, he promised as he wrapped around Zhao Zi shoulders. Relaxing into Jack’s warmth, Zhao Zi felt a bit of his loneliness disapate. It would take time, but jack would stay. Maybe he wouldn’t feel lonely anymore.

Marvel snap AU

Just to be incredibly angsty, imagine your OTP going through the snap.

Imagine how they are in the middle of something normal and one turns to the other to share a smile or say something when they other just falls into dust.

Imagine that they felt it coming, crumbling slowly away as the other sobs and tries to desperately hold them together.

Imagine the one left behind waiting for years, trying to live without their partner at their side.

Imagine they joy when the other returns. The tearful reunion and the promise not to leave each other again.

Or, imagine the confusion when one returns to find that the other has moved on, aged and in a new relationship. Imagine them trying to cope with all these sudden changes without their partner, remembering a time when they were happy and wishing that they had stayed. Imagine them moving on with a family now years older than them, feeling misplaced in this whole new world.

Imagine your OTP.

When you can’t concentrate on the storyline because you keep getting distracted by all the GORGEOUS and detailed costumes in 陈情令

No!

Tang Yi and Shao Fei soulmate au

A short Drabble based of my other two part soulmate AU for Jack and ZhaoZi.

Tang Yi never gave much thought to his soulmate words. There was always something more pressing in his life, such as looking after Hong Ye, managing the business, of working on his cooking. After Mr Tang gave him a home he simply didn’t bother with the idea of a soulmate. He had all the happiness that he needed.

But then Mr Tang died and he found himself stuck in a hospital bed recovering from a nearly fatal bullet wound to the chest. At first he was so consumed with his grieving emotions and thoughts of revenge that he hadn’t really noticed the man come through the door. The doctor at his bedside had glanced up at the visitor before leaving the room, his departure making Tang Yi adress the man. He was young, probably around his age, with short cut black hair and a expressive face. His eyes were red rimmed and it was clear he had been crying. For a moment Tang Yi wondered why the man had been crying before he recalled the other body. The female officer had also been murdered with Mr Tang. She must have been close to this young officer.

“Do you know who shot you?”

The question caught Tang Yi by surprise and he felt the scribble on his forearm heat up. Refusing to think about the consequences of the reaction of his words, he schooled his face into a calm expression.

“No” he stated clearly. He watched as the officer’s eyes widened as his hand flew to the back of his neck. But before he could speak the hospital doors flew open and a small guy poked his head through.

“Shao Fei”, he called as the officer turned around. “The boss wants you to head back to the station. Says they need help going through Tang’s files”.

Shao Fei groaned and turned back to glare at Tang Yi. “I know that you know who shot you, no matter what you say”, he said stubbornly. Tang Yi was just noticing how big Shao Fei’ ears were. (He’s on a lot of medication. Sue him) “I promise you that I will figure out the truth and bring the people responsible to justice”, Shao Fei continued. Tang Yi tilted his head in challenge, meeting Shao Fei’s gaze. “Let’s hope you get there first then”, he muttered just loud enough for the other to hear. The pissed off expression Shao Fei gave him almost made him snort. The guy just looked too ridiculous with his monkey ears. As Shao Fei left the room, Tang Yi was left considering their encounter and hoping that he would not have to deal with such a loud impulsive officer again.

Unfortunately, Shao Fei didn’t get the same idea.

For four years the officer pursued him. The guy seemed to pop up everywhere and it was getting on Tang Yi’s nerve. He was too busy trying to turn the company legal to pay attention to the stubborn policeman. Every occurrence consisted of Shao Fei asking questions and Tang Yi responding with cool dismissals and negative answers. He half wondered, whenever he gave Shao Fei a thought, why the officer even bothered? He would even turn up when off work! He had to admire his persistence.

As time drew on, Tang Yi started finding benefits to Shao Fei’s chase. Leaving anonymous tips at the station about a secret meeting between him and various other gang leaders was a easy way to get his enemies arrested. Besides, Jack’s descriptions of Shao Fei’s face every time he realised that Tang Yi was not there were too good to be true.

The officer was the best to tease. His face was so expressive that Tang Yi just couldn’t help annoying him just for the reaction. Cuffing him to the elevator with his own handcuffs was by far the funniest. Shao Fei had looked so frustrated and angry that Tang Yi has to fight back a grin. But despite this teasing and the continued persistence Shao Fei, neither men discussed the subject of soulmates.

That is until they were kidnapped and hiding on some mountain side.

It was Shao Fei who broached it first. He was quietly watching the fire Tang Yi had made when he spoke. “Did your words ever react?” He asked. The question surprised Tang Ti who paused his action of poking the flames and turned to face the other. Shao Fei looked tired and his face had a slight vulnerability that Tang Yi had never seen before. He was not meeting his gaze, eyes fixed on the fire in front of him and Tang Yi could see the blood on his sleeve where his tie was wrapped around the wound.

“It’s just”, Shao Fei continued after a minute of Tang Yi not responding. “When mine heated up, it caught me by surprise. Its on the back of my neck so I never really paid attention to it. It was a complete refusal anyway”. Shao Fei shifted, voice becoming sad. His shirt collar moved and Tang Yi could just about see the neat word ‘No’ inscribed at the base of his neck. Tang Yi didn’t say anything. After a few minutes Shao Fei headed inside the shelter, leaving Tang Yi with his thoughts.

The first time Tang Yi felt the urge to kiss Shao Fei was when he was looking for his lighter. He was so afraid that he had lost it somewhere on that mountain that when Shao Fei turned up with the lighter in hand, Tang Yi was shocked by the sudden urge to kiss the other senseless arising in his chest. As he always did, he ignored the feeling and thanked the other.

However, the more his ignored his feelings, the more they seemed to rise. It was particularly bad when the puppy like officer invited himself to stay over under the excuse of ‘protecting’ Tang Yi. Especially since the self sacrificing idiot kept on getting himself injured for him. Although, his flustered expression when Tang Yi gave him a back massage was hilarious.

But then Shao Fei got shot protecting Hong Ye and Tang Yi was consumed by a sudden fear of losing the annoying policeman. He hadn’t even realised that he had began to care for him until the threat of losing him was too much. Every time he returned to the hospital, he was struck by feelings of care and admiration for the man in the bed. At first he ignored the feelings until Shao Fei would look up and greet him with a smile that Tang Yi couldn’t help but return.

So when Shao Fei asked him to walk with him up to the hospital roof, Tang Yi happily agreed. Watching Shao Fei overlook the city and drink in the fresh air left a warm smile on his face. When Shao Fei turned around and pulled him into a kiss, Tang Yi responded before he could even think things through, kissing back with so much hunger that it caught Shao Fei by surprise.

As they finally pulled away, Shao Fei rested his forehead against Tang Yi’s. “I have been pursuing you for four years Tang Yi”, he grinned. “Can I assume that this is an answer to my confession?” Tang Yi smiled at Shao Fei’s proud puppy like expression. “Yes”, he answered. “I accept your confession”. Shao Fei laughed triumphantly before pulling him in for another kiss.

Calling all BL academics! You should check out Intersections: Gender and Sexuality in Asia and the Pacific Issue 49, June 2023. It's devoted to Thai BL and it's Thai scholars, publishing in English, and available free. So basically everything I ever wanted.

Thai Boys Love (BL)/Y(aoi) in Literary and Media Industries: Political and Transnational Practices - This is the introductory article. One interesting takeaway is that there's a market for western M/M romance in Thailand and I'm dying to know what sort of titles have gotten Thai releases.

Chinese Historical BL by Thai Writers: The Thai BL Polysystem in the Age of Media Convergence - I didn't read this one. It's about the phenomenon of Thai writers writing danmei set in ancient China.

Authorial Revisions of Boys Love/Y Novels: The Dialogue between Activism and the Literary Industry in Thailand - This one was super intersting. It was about how the backlash to certain problematic tropes affected both revisions to Y novels and their tv adaptations. It uses Jittirain as a case study and includes passages from 2gether that were rewritten.

Boys Love (Yaoi) Fandom and Political Activism in Thailand - This article has a lot about Not Me, both about the backlash to the novle due to it being originally a GOT7 fanfic (allegedly) and the political context for the series. It also discusses a few other series related to the youth movement and marriage equality.

Heterosexual Reading vs. Queering Thai Boys' Love Dramas among Chinese and Filipino Audiences -This really only covers up to 2019 and as we all know everything is changing fast. I'll be interested in future scholarship that covers the current period. Basically expands on some of Baudinette's work.

Provincialising Thai Boys Love: Queer Desire and the Aesthetics of Rural Cosmopolitanism -I just skimmed this since I'm not familiar with either series mentioned or the rural culture of Isan.

wait, So we're not crazy???

In England, in a town called Uckfield, there is a skate, surf and snowboard shop on the high street. It’s called pipedreams. Which automatically reminds me of Andreil.

Maybe Neil owns a extreme sports shop in the uk and Andrew is travelling with Kevin and they go to get equipment.

(I sort of think that Neil would be a kickass skater/snowboarder. Maybe Andrew is a skier? Or he surfs?)

But they meet and get all competitive and the story goes on from there?

Someone one expand this idea please!

Asian dramas list (mostly lgbt).

I watch a lot of dramas and made this list for my friends so they knew which ones I like. Just putting it out there for anyone who wants some good recommendations.

🔹- particular faves.

- My engineer (the series). Four main gay couples. Adorable. Can be found on youtube. (Anxiously awaiting season 2) Thai.🔹

- 2moons2. Thai. (not just 2moons. The first series never got completed so they redid it.) three main couples, adorable. on youtube.🔹

- Love by chance. (Thai. Season 2 is currently benign released. On youtube, Viki and dailymotion.) two main couples, with two more iffy couples in the background. I don’t really count those. 🔹

- Sotus the series. One main couple. On Netflix. Season 2 is on dailymotion I think. Thai. 🔹

- Cause you’re my boy. Teen cringeyness, but adorable. One couple. Thai, On youtube.

- Why R you (the series). On YouTube’. Thai. (Two couples. Every couple is adorable in this. Main couple are huge dorks with a shared braincell).

- Until we meet again. (Has disturbing themes but happy ending) Thai. one main couple with a hinted second couple, on youtube.

- Theory of love. (Not my fave but still okay). Thai. On youtube.

- 2gether the series. (Adorable. Two main couples. Season 2 just came out) Thai. On youtube.🔹

- Diary of a tootsie. (A Thai comedy about a group of drag queen friends. Hilarious and crazy). On youtube or Dailymotion. There are two seasons and a movie. The movie is on Netflix. But watch the series first.

- YYY the series. Thai. (If you liked diary of a tootsie then this is also a ridiculous comedy. It’s a bit on crack) on dailymotion or Facebook.

- History3: trapped. (This is in mandarin). On Viki rakuten or Dailymotion. (All the history shows are on Viki).🔹

- History3: Make our days count. (Adorable but you’re WILL cry). On Viki and maybe Dailymotion. 🔹

- I actually recommend all of the history shows. They’re all lovely and cute. 🔹 (Update: Not History4: Close to you. The main couple are cute but I found the second couple triggering and toxic. I don’t recommend).

- The Untamed. (A bromantic Chinese drama but based off a lgbt novel). On Netflix. 🔹

- Advance bravely. (Another chinese ‘bromance’ based off of a bl novel). On dailymotion.

- Guardian. (Yet another ‘bromance’ based off a lgbt book. Fantasy show with a good plot and great characters) on Viki.

- Dark blue and moonlight. (Taiwan. On Viki, pretty good. The humans are flawed and it’s dramatic, but very realistic. On Viki).

- Hello stranger. (A Filipino drama. Ongoing- I’m currently watching this). On youtube.

- Game boys (Filipino drama set in lockdown, just came out. I related to this so much. Will cry!). On youtube. 🔹

- Just like the movies, Filipino drama. Roommates combined with the fake bf trope. (Currently being released. On youtube).

- The shipper, Thai drama. (Angsty with gender bending themes. You will cry!)

- Life: love on the line. (Japanese. On Viki) it’s similar to history. Absolutely adorable. 🔹

- My gear, your gown. (Thai series currently coming out. Cute so far. On youtube).

- Mr heart. Korean. (Just became available on Viki. Adorable. I died a few times). 🔹

- Oh my general. Chinese. (Straight couple in a fantasy setting by explores gender roles a lot and is rather funny). On Viki.

- Arsenal military academy. (Chinese. Set in the twenties. Girl dresses as a boy to attend military academy. Funny and action filled. On Viki).

- My roommate is a detective. (Hilarious Sherlock homes inspired drama set in the 30s. Bromance and great friendship. Ignore the shitty English characters) on Viki.

- Winter Begonia. (Yet another bl book turned into a bromance drama). Chinese. On youtube.

- Thirty years of virginity can make you a wizard (also known as cherry magic). Japanese bl. Absolutely adorable. Can be found on Dailymotion. 🔹

- Until we meet again & Love is more than a word. Chinese bl dramas. Both have the same casts but set in different times. One is a historical setting abs the other is in the 1930s. It’s the idea of reincarnation and lovers connected through lifetimes. Whole cast is amazing. 🔹

- Uncanny counter. Korean fantasy drama. Lovely characters. Absolutely adorable and great plot. Male main character is so wholesome. On Netflix.

- Gen Y the series. Thai drama. Main couple are adorable. Not sure what’s going on with the second couple though. On youtube.

- Ingredients the series. Thai. A very short adorable series obviously filmed in lockdown. Boyfriends cooking. On youtube.

- Colour rush. Korean lgbt mature drama. Short episodes but really good plot. Based off a webcomic and the two male leads are so pretty. On Viki.

- We best love N1: For you. Taiwan drama. Came out 2021. Enemies to lovers. On dailymotion. Adorable. 🔷

Man from uncle-

Gabby: Hi I’m gabby and this is my boyfriend Illya.

Gabby: .... and his boyfriend Napoleon.

The Witcher-

Yennefer: I am Yennefer and this is my boyfriend Geralt.

Yennefer:... and his boyfriend Jaskier.

(This applies to so many fandoms).

I’m gonna do this all at once.

Peggy: Hi, I’m Peggy. This is my boyfriend Steve.

Peggy: ……And this is Steve’s boyfriend Bucky.

Padme: Hi, I’m Padme. This is my secret husband Anakin.

Padme: ……And this is Anakin’s step Master and boyfriend Obi-Wan.

Leia: Hi, I’m Leia. This is my husband Han.

Leia: ……And this is Han’s boyfriend and my brother Luke.