See The Issue With Being A Multi Shipper For Ur Fave Is

Broke; the robins are better at the skill their predecessor struggle with

Woke: the robins pretend to suck at an unimportant civilian thing their predecessor was good at bc fuck you it’s boring

Dicks one will be Bruce for this thought experiment

Dick dropped out of business school Grayson

Jason can’t do a square root Todd

Tim last time i touched a book it physically burned me like it was garlic and I was a vampire Drake

Stephanie pretends she doesn’t know who the safari thingymagij works Brown

Damian knows slang and refuses to use it around he family give him mid 18th century terminology or give him death Wayne

You wrote about murder?? Murder is illegal?? You wrote about this dude killing someone and you didn’t even say ‘murder is bad’ at the start of the book, wht wtf, wtf is wrong with you? I can’t believe you condone murder, I can’t believe you’re pro murber, oh my fucking God don'ttalk to me when ou literally kill people, freak. I’m calling the cops, what the fuck, I’m shaking and crying.

Dick: I wouldn’t wish that upon my worst enemy unless of course we are talking about my enemy Talia al ghul. Fuck you, you know what you did.

✨Incorrect quotes✨

(Except they are real conversations that I or my friends had).

Wally: I'm going to kill myself.

Dick: Same.

Wally: ... Figuratively speaking, right?

Dick: Literally.

Wally: I'm calling your therapist.

Dick: You don't know my therapist.

Wally: Well, I'm gonna find them and then call them!

Dick: What's life without a little of risk?

Donna: A longer life.

Dick: ...

Dick: Who needs to live so long?

Random Socialite: You are just like your dad (Bruce). His genes must be strong.

Literally any of the Wayne kids (minus Damian): I'm adopted.

Tim, after going back to drinking natural fruit juice instead of five cans of Monster: I feel nutritious.

Bruce, after being told how handsome Dick is by like five people; completely confident and proud: Yeah, he got it from me.

Dick: I'm literally adopted.

Dick: The only thing I got from you is an addiction to using expensive sheets.

Tim, listening to loud music, knowing Jason was there and wanting to annoy him:

Jason, completely fed up with the world: TURN OFF YOUR MUSIC IT'S TOO HOT OUTSIDE.

Tim:

Tim: And what the hell does that have to do with it??? *proceeds to turn up the volume*

Annoying math teacher: Okay, students, do your math...

Dick: Do we do it mentally or can we use the calculator?

Teacher: Do it mentally with the calculator.

Dick, and probably the rest of the class: ???

Tim: I slept for 14 hours and I'm still sleepy.

Jason: Wtf. And I thought that sleeping 10 hours was a lot.

Damian: I don't know how you sleep more than 8 hours, you are lazy.

Steph: Let them enjoy their sleep. I can't even sleep 6 hours because of college.

Cass: 4 hours. Take it or leave it.

Bruce: At least you sleep more than 2 hours.

Dick: What the fuck did sleep mean?

Tim: I failed the natural sciences exam.

Dick: How? You said it was one of the easiest subjects.

Tim: It is!

Dick: So?

Tim: ...

Tim: I put "solar ecosystem" on the exam.

Steph: When I was little, we had to sweep the classroom at school, and since I hated sweeping, I pretended I didn't know how to do it.

Steph: Then, a classmate who always wanted to be superior, made fun of me, grabbed the broom and started sweeping for me.

Steph: She stayed sweeping the whole recess and I was able to go out and play without doing anything.

Dick: I'm so fucking proud of you.

Duke: What are you doing on the floor?

Dick, overstimulated because there is too much shit going: Floor time.

Barbara: You're autistic.

Barbara: Artist, I mean. Sorry, the phone's autocorrect.

Dick: We are having a face-to-face conversation.

(This is a bit lost in English, but in Spanish the words are "artista" and "autista", and they sound and are written in a similar way.)

Tim: Can we go to the sun if we go at night?

Duke: I swear they told me you were smart.

Damian: Who lied to you that way?

Steph: Which Hogwarts house would you be?

Dick: According to the test, I'm a Hufflepuff.

Steph: I've seen you angry.

Dick: Have you ever seen an angry honey badger?

Steph: ... Good point.

Dick: I take pills, everyday, so that I don't kill myself. 🎶

Roy: I'm dragging you to the psychologist right now.

Dick: We need an adult.

Garth: We are adults.

Dick: Responsible adults.

Roy: Normally you are the responsible adult.

Dick:

Dick: How the fuck are we still alive?

Get out of my dms I will not be your peer-reviewer ANYMORE !!! I QUIT !!!

Beta-read my cringe-fail angst or else

It's an honor killing if it happens in Asia, femicide if it happens in LaTam but it's a preventable tragedy if it happens in the USA

I know he is legit suicidal at that point and the entire city of Bludhaven is being erased from the map but this is so cool. So badass.

This is one of those panel I would die to see animated. Are you kidding ?

I’m so sorry are we calling the shit with mirage?? And Catalina??? Cheating? Like in NTT when she KIDNAPS Kori and disguises herself as her and then sleeps with him only to reveal it in front of his team to which he vehemently states that he loves Kori.

OR that time with Catalina when he was engaged to babs and she left him to figure herself out and he was forced into sex while having a mental breakdown on a rooftop? Ya know after watching people who mattered to him as well as people who just met him DIE? After sleeping on a fireescape bc his apartment blew up? Where during the scene he desperately apologizes to Catalina and has a full on psychotic breakdown?

OR was it the decanonized wedding story that everyone and their mother has argued stated and agreed is staunchly out of character for him? Oh yeah also even for most of the decanonized stuff he was being mind manipulated by brother blood? Come on?? The raven storyline??? Don’t even start with me

Wanna talk about him being flaky? Fine?

Wanna talk about the fact he’s too stuck to the bats he can’t actually handle the aspects of a relationship and ends up neglecting his partner yeah canon fine

Wanna talk about him being a manipulative shit yeah okay

BUT CHEATING??

Nah fuck offff with that noise

Also I make jokes about Tim being toxic

Bc I am a Steph Stan and YEAH HE WAS

My brother in Christ, what comics are you reading???

I understand the part about defending Tim about being someone who constantly cheats on his partners (I defended him too), but that gratuitous attack on Dick???

And I'm sorry to tell you that Tim wasn't a big fan of Jason-

"read the comics" "people who don't read comics are so annoying" "fans don't even read comics" dude be so fr you're not better at all

Me with my female favorite characters: look at you my perfect perfect girl. I cannot say a single thing that may be misinterpreted so I will literally only say that you should be everyone’s favorite you can’t do anything wrong ever and I love you so much and you need more appreciation. Banned from my tags cuz if I have to read angst about you I will sob. And if you go through trauma in canon I will give you a story to healthily process these issues and learn and grow from them my darlings

Me with my male favorite characters: … you have so many issues already…. Give them more. I will find your worst moments and make sure everyone knows about them. Your least favorite trait of yourself is my favorite and I will use this to abuse you psychologically. Not only will I explicitly search for fiction that hurts you I will make it myself. I hate you (my beloved) you will never hear a compliment out of my you stupid stupid man I love you.

Listen my moms Muslim my dads Christian I was raised agnostic but still it doesn’t matter everyone can use the capitalist holiday to eat a fuck ton of food and day drink

Merry winter time