The Wind-Up Doll
More than this, yes more than this one can stay silent.
With a fixed gaze like that of the dead one can stare for long hours at the smoke rising from a cigarette at the shape of a cup at a faded flower on the rug at a fading slogan on the wall.
One can draw back the drapes with wrinkled fingers and watch rain falling heavy in the alley a child standing in a doorway holding colorful kites a rickety cart leaving the deserted square in a noisy rush
One can stand motionless by the drapes—blind, deaf.
One can cry out with a voice quite false, quite remote "I love..." in a man's domineering arms one can be a healthy, beautiful female
With a body like a leather tablecloth with two large and hard breasts, in bed with a drunk, a madman, a tramp one can stain the innocence of love.
One can degrade with guile all the deep mysteries one can keep on figuring out crossword puzzles happily discover the inane answers inane answers, yes—of five or six letters.
With bent head, one can kneel a lifetime before the cold gilded grill of a tomb one can find God in a nameless grave one can trade one's faith for a worthless coin one can mold in the corner of a mosque like an ancient reciter of pilgrim's prayers. one can be constant, like zero whether adding, subtracting, or multiplying. one can think of your --even your—eyes in their cocoon of anger as lusterless holes in a time-worn shoe. one can dry up in one's basin, like water.
With shame one can hide the beauty of a moment's togetherness at the bottom of a chest like an old, funny looking snapshot, in a day's empty frame one can display the picture of an execution, a crucifixion, or a martyrdom, One can cover the crake in the wall with a mask one can cope with images more hollow than these.
One can be like a wind-up doll and look at the world with eyes of glass, one can lie for years in lace and tinsel a body stuffed with straw inside a felt-lined box, at every lustful touch for no reason at all one can give out a cry "Ah, so happy am I!"'
- Forough Farrokhzad
Virginia Woolf, from a letter to Lady Robert Cecil written c. January 1907
“why would you write fics for small, unpopular fandoms? you’re not gonna reach that many hits in fandoms not many people know about” ?? because I’m not writing fics for hits or kudos, I’m writing them for me because these characters are my blorbos and I have so many ideas, so much thoughts about them that my brain might explode if I don’t write them out.
i hope you write (i hope we both write)
reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something
weigh the pros and cons repeatedly.
ask for advice from friends or mentors.
feel anxious and restless.
struggle to sleep, thinking about the decision.
go back and forth between options.
fear making the wrong choice.
imagine possible outcomes and consequences.
feel pressure from external expectations.
seek out as much information as possible.
procrastinate on making the final decision.
experience self-doubt and second-guessing.
wish for a clear sign or answer.
great, my post is in some sort of dungeon
hey so we put your morally grey character in a fandom. yeah half the fanbase makes them into a perfect angel who did nothing wrong and the other half depicts them as a cartoonishly evil villain who hurts people for fun. no we dont know how to explain that people can do bad things for good reasons or good things for bad reasons. sorry man
writer | character analysis| poems | opinion ✮ digital brain dumpster ✮
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