Sakumo Being A Super Popular Borderline Sex Symbol In His Era Will Never Stop Being My Favorite Hc, I

Haunting Memories

Danny is like a cockroach. No matter what happens he just keeps coming back.

Every Wayne has watched this kid die.

Every single Bat and Bird has failed to save him

They don't realize it's the same dude at first

They all just think they're having an absolute shit week.

He saved Damians life when he took that bullet

Jason watched him give his life for a kid when a bus was coming and the kid wouldn't get out of the way in time. Jason wasn't close enough (maybe they both would have lived if Jason had been closer. Faster. Better)

Cass saw the knife fly at him. She was too far. Couldn't tell to save him. She watched him fall in silence. He never made a sound.

He was at the top of a flight of stairs. Barbra watched him lose his balance. She was trapped by her chair and the daylight hours. She watched. Helpless as he tumbled to the ground, and lay, broken, before her.

Bruce was running late when it happened. His car stalled. Just as a boy, no older than his sons, ran (or flew or appeared) down the street. Out of breath. Covered in blood and bruises. Clothing torn. Bruce made to get out of the car as the boy turned and shouted. As if making his final stand. Bruce watches as the boy is gunned down by men in white. It's not until much later that he realizes the boy stopped where he, did, not because he was exhausted, but because they were running towards a crowd. That he had stopped running, had givens himself up, to protect the innocent.

Alfred held out a hand to a child. Too small and young and thin by far. He was just heading out to meet an old friend. He had no supplies, no emergency button no phone. No food to share or clean clothes to offer. Suddenly he found himself on the ground with the child on top of him, head oozing from what appeared to be a piece fallen from the building above them. The child has pushed him out of the way. His final act had been to save a stranger.

They're eating a meal in silence. All together for the first time in a long while. When there's a knock at the door. A case worker. Asking if Mr. Wayne were able to take in a child. Just for a short while. It was an emergency. He had no where else to go. They were desperate.

Bruce is tempted to say no. It's been a terrible couple of weeks. But who was he to turn away a child in need. Of course he has room. Let him tell Alfred. Just come through to the dining room when you're ready, you remember where it is of course? Excellent. We'll put extra places out for the both of you. Of course you're welcome to join us for dinner, it's awfully late and you must be starving.

Bruce goes back to let Alfred know they'll have dinner guests and is just settling in when the Boy They All Watched Die walks in closely tailing the social worker.

Chaos ensues

(reposting cuz someone wrote an awesome fic on AO3) Linking below. leave them some love if u like. they really took this snippet and ran with it!)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/51328789/chapters/129695641

"Cockroach (you can't kill me in any way that matters)" (in case the link breaks again)

I feel confident enough to post these now. A collection of all the existing posters after some edits from the other post that got 13k notes! These are full size/quality. Go nuts.

You may use them for wallpapers, tabletop campaigns, whatever. Consider tipping me or buying a print or sticker on ko-fi here! If you do use them, let me know what for, or send pictures!

[Lovechild AU]

Kids feat. Zenku Soukoku

Sakumo being a super popular borderline sex symbol in his era will never stop being my favorite hc, I need to see more of it

All the people his age and younger had a crush on him. It was just a Thing(tm) where 9 times out of 10, a Konoha shinobi's first crush was probably Sakumo. Even other villages young shinobi hung up his bingo book picture above their bunk and dreamed of both killing him, being killed by him (in a hot way), having a battlefield fling with him, and more. There was blackmarket fanfiction. He was incredibly popular among civilians all over fire country. Some popular romance novels had love interests very blatantly based off him.

Even before they were on a team together, Obito and Rin both had a silly kid crush on Kakashi's dad (Obito more than Rin) and he was aware of it. This did not help make him like them any more. (By the time hearing smthn positive ab his dad would have made Kakashi softer, they'd both gotten better at hiding the crush, so to Kakashi it looked like they'd gotten over Sakumo.) Even Minato had a bit of a thing for him, not really but like— strong, popular, feard and very friendly ninja who is now paying him some attention (bc hes his kids teacher) he's not immune. Kushina understands, she is also not immune. (Kakashi is going to throw a fucking fit)

Even after his failed mission, when his reputation crashes and burns within the village, he still can't completely shake his admirers— they possibly just get more disrespectful ab the attraction when it mixes with the hate. (Which tbh could make for an interesting discussion all on its own)

Kakashi is haunted by his father's insane popularity for decades after his death. He does his very best to ignore the lingering evidence of people being insane ab his father.

One day he realizes one of his favorite romance novels has a romance interest based off Sakumo and has a break down ab it and can never read the series again.

When raiding an old abandoned enemy camp w Team Ro, he finds an old, autographed photo of his dad covered in lipstick marks in the communal bathroom. He chooses to ignore it but it's quickly spotted by his teammates, who do not know who Sakumk is, and v quickly begin to remark on the poster, who this mysterious Konoha nin is, and ahaha damn he is kinda good looking, huh? (Kakashi wants to DIE)

Shisui ends up taking the poster back to Konoha with them and hangs it up in the ANBU communal quarters where it is VERY quickly recognized. And also some of the people in that room recognize it so quick bc they also used to own a similar poster. (Kakashi wants to DIE someone PLEASE kill him now)

Its only when he's given team 7 that he finally thinks he's escaped the legacy of his father as Konoha's Most Sexiest Shinobi. Only for Naruto, when being trained by Jiriyah, to find his drafts for Icha Icha very clearly inspired by his dad. Which he can never publish for multiple reasons (lingering respect for Sakumo. Also for Kakashi, who is his biggest fan and would probably never look at him again.)

Naruto somehow accidentally brings this up with Kakashi who like. Has war flashbacks and immediatley stands up and walks away as Jiryah scrambles to try to explain himself and Tsunade looks on in scorn (she will approach him later to carefully ask for the drafts while trying to seem like she's not really asking for them bc she's too proud to admit it)

Naruto and Sakura discover Kakashi-sensei's dad was a sex symbol. I don't even know how they'd react but like. Oh my god. Oh my god you guys.

Funniest option would be they accidentally revive his popularity a little bit by being so loud ab it they like, remind people ab him. + introduce another generation to the idea of him

Kakashi is crouched on the floor with his face in his hands. When will he be freed from this hell.

Sasuke does not escape tho, he goes to sound and finds a picture of Sensei's dad in Orochimaru's office (???????)

This is such a shitty sketch but the vision:

Itachi, who learned who Sakumo was from that poster thing, goes on to find a photo of him in ""Madara's"" belongings and gets super weirded out but ultimately doesn't. Super care. But also. Like. What. What.

After Itachi finds the photo, which Obito genuinley forgot he fucking had and keeps in part just bc its like one of the only belongings that remained from his Konoha days, he shoves it somewhere in Kamui to forget about.

But then in the Obito vs Kakashi Kamui fight, it fucking flutters down in the middle of the fight and Obito fucking dies of humiliation as Kakashi realizes he will truly Never Escape and that this reality is his own personal hell

Uhh endgame Kakashi becomes Hokage and accidentally retreads his father's path in becoming the new Konoha Sexy Man. Which simultaneously crushes him (he will never escape) and fills him with delight (he will now be able to impart the pain of having your father figure be lusted after by all ur friends and acquaintances onto his students)

Special edition Christmas fic where genin aged team 7 decide hatch their newest plot to see Kakashi's face: using mistletoe

Because if they trap him under it with someone, he'll surely have to take his mask off to give them a kiss! ...Right?

(Sasuke thinks this is fucking stupid)

The entire thing is just a fucking slapstick comedy as Kakashi goes "what's the funniest way I can go along with this." And decides he will in fact lower his mask and give a kiss to everyone the kids corner him with. But only when they look away / blink / their view is obstructed

The kids are chasing him around with a string on a stick w mistletoe tied to the end of it, and every time they miss seeing the kiss (and his face) hey scream even louder

Reactions range from "???!?????!?!??????" (Iruka) to straight up passing out (Gai) to laughing hysterically with a bright red face (Kurenai) to just sort of freezing up like a deer in headlights (Asuma)

Kakashi, having way too much fun, makes a shadow clone to pull the Sukea thing again. And the kids get "Sukea" on board, thinking he can take a photo the second Kakashi pulls his mask down for a smooch. Kakashi has WAY too much fun, essentially role-playing with himself and swooning dramatically. Then, at the end, Sukea goes, "Oh no the camera's memory card is gone, Kakashi must have stolen it :((" and the kids all scream in agony

They try to get him to describe Kakashi's face and Sukea gets all coy and goes "umm... its kind of... indescribable?"

(They get another person to try to snap a photo of him but they turn out to be a freezer so they don't take the picture. When the kids harass them ab it they just giggle a little maniacally ab his face)

This does escalate to doing this shit w enemy nin btw. Funniest option is obviously Tobi but I'm also raising u a really freaked the fuck out Itachi looking like an angry, surprised cat after Kakashi gives him a peck on the cheek (Sasuke is gonna fucking KILL HIMSELF)

Obito gets the full makeout session bc its funniest.

He shows up looking for a dramatic fight but like halfway through his villain speech, team 7 dangles the mistletoe over him, and he's so thrown off guard he just kinda "???? excuse me I'm kind of in the middle of—"

Kakashi, who is a) in too deep to stop the bit now, and b) recognizes a good way to throw off an enemy, fucking launches himself at him, pushes Tobi's mask up just enough to kiss, and starts to make out w him

His back is turned to the kids and they're all scrambling to try to catch a single glimpse, but he keeps his back to them as they scream and run around (thus prolonging the kiss)

Kakashi is totally checked out of the actual kiss, this is all fun and games to him. Obito is having a fucking religious experience wrapped in a manic episode flavored internal breakdown topped off with a very loud high pitched kettle noise that may or may not be confined to his brain

This lasts for like a solid minute before Kakashi releases him and readjust his mask, pats him on the shoulder and goes "sorry about that teehee"

Obito just kinda 🧍‍♀️ and they stare at eachother for another solid minute as team 7 screams and cries and throws up in the bg

Kakashi, seeing the opportunity to leave and avoid what was for sure going to be a potentially devistating fight: "cool. So, anyways. Bye lmao." And runs for it w his students

Obito is left tanding still as a statue in the middle of the clearing. After like 20 seconds alone he starts hyperventilating.

Merry Christmas everybody 👍

Amity Park got turned into an island in a fantasy universe (Fantasy AU)

When Amity Park left the Infinite Realms it didn’t reappear where it had been before, instead it seemed to land in the ocean. Water all around them, a landmass barely on the horizon. Phantom flew to take a look and when he came back told the people of Amity Park that they were not in their universe. He had seen dragons and other creatures that definitely didn’t exist on earth.

Amity Park was now an island. Sandy beaches surrounded the once land-locked city and a row of problems arose faster than solutions could be found. They had food in the supermarkets, the mall and some smaller stores, but the fridges and freezers needed electricity. It took the Fentons and a few electricians to find a solution. 

That was the start of the Fenton Ecto Battery, while the Fentons themselves had already used ecto to power their inventions they now had to find a way to build a battery big enough to power the whole city and then somehow find a way to connect it to the existing lines under the city. 

There was also the problem of money, while people had money, the bank itself didn’t store all of the money in cash. There was no internet or phone service, they were transported into a time before in their minds. 

“Well, the portal still works, can’t we just go back?” 

Phantom had to explain that he couldn’t transport the whole city, he was already busy using his ice until they had power again. Not to mention that the whole city now knew that Phantom was Fenton. And Danny also helped with the F.E.B.

Tucker and Technus were the ones who took on the problem, they had already been working on multiverse phones, so Tucker and Sam could reach Danny no matter where he was, in the Realms or not. 

People who had worked outside of Amity Park were forced to find new work inside the city, retirees came back to work to help as well with knowledge how to do jobs without the modern comforts. 

They were lucky an old man had retired and moved to live with his daughter after a lifetime of building ships. Thanks to him the Amity Parkers actually had a chance at fresh food. Phantom was eventually send out to look for cows, chickens, whatever he would find that could be taken care of for food later on.

The first year was plagued by problems the people had to slowly work out, as well as the struggle of the entire town being heavily liminal due to their three-day-exposure in the Realms. Getting used to people floating suddenly, or phasing into the ground from one step to the next as well as suddenly being a lot stronger and faster were a lot.

The second year slowly worked better, people were used to their new abilities, their new way of life, the ghosts that had attacked them before were now helping them out. Ghostwriter had taken over a big chunk of teaching after he found books about the world’s history and different cultures. 

It wasn’t until their fifth year, now rather used to this life, that they saw a ship coming their way for the first time. The ship carried with it a diplomatic party. In the years Danny had flown over to the continent again and again, learning about animals, seeing the land that was nearest to theirs and thus had been chosen to talk to the newcomers. 

When the diplomatic party had been led through the town they were in awe as well as scared. These people lived not far from the most dangerous forest and yet they had incredible technology. Carriages with now animals to draw them, silently rolling or some even flying through the streets. Streets made from one big stone it seemed while living in equally big stone houses. It was this expedition's quest to visit the land behind the forest. They couldn’t go through the forest, so they had taken a ship, only to be surprised that an island was on the horizon.

It was risky to change their route to the island instead of around the forest, but it would be best. Either they found new lands, or they found new people to trade with. The king was in a desperate situation while trying to build up a poor kingdom he inherited from his father who had run the country into the ground. 

The island was big, and on it was a city bigger and taller than anything they had ever seen, the people living on it were not humans, they had glowing eyes, fangs, long ears. Identifiers from elves and demons, yet they didn’t own the same coloring of the demons or the lithe statue of the elves. 

Nothing about this city had prepared them for the person they met to talk to. The people living here could talk in their language in a broken and heavily accented way, but it was made clear that whoever they were to meet was important. So they stared at the big house and strange contraption on top of it, pressing a button and a sound came from inside the house. The door was opened by a tall woman, she invited them in, inside was more colorful than they had ever seen aside from palaces. 

The house was not big enough for a palace, yet the inside would not lose out in it’s fancy design new to them. The woman told them to wait as she got someone to talk to them, when she reentered the room she was followed by a man even taller than her. Long dark hair braided back, even in the dirty clothes he was wearing and with dirt smeared on him he gave an imposing aura.

“Ah, hello.” Of the group of outsiders a man at the front took a step forward and bowed before answering.

“Greetings, we are the delegation of the kingdom of Root. In the name of his majesty king Jovic the first of his name we would like to open trade with your kingdom.” Danny scratched his cheek, making eye contact with Jazz for a moment. She nodded.

“Welcome to Amity Park then, we aren’t really a kin-” Jazz smiled as she stepped on his foot.

“I mean… I’m Phantom, High King of the Infinite Realms.” 

“I’m Jasmine, his sister.” She turned towards what the group now knew as this island’s king and started to talk to him in another language they had heard spoken by the people of the island. They seemed to discuss something before Jasmine took out a small device and proceeded to tap her finger on it, before putting it away.

“You must be tired from the long journey, please follow the guard to your resting quarters. We will talk again tomorrow.” They were led out by the same people who had taken them to their king. When they entered the even taller building they were led to and brought up to a floor filled with doors and given keys with strange symbols on them they were confused.

“The number on the key belongs to the number on the door.” A young woman said and showed them that the key would only work on the door with the same numbers on them. “Someone will come and bring you food, they will knock on the door. Rest for today, tomorrow Phantom will send somebody to lead you to the town hall for talks.” 

The food they were served later in the day was incredible, spices were used freely as well as meat and a meat-free option. The rooms themselves were fit for a palace and came each with their own bathroom. There was flowing water coming from a pipe above a basin and the tub! Each room had it! They talked together until late in the night, they would need to ask for the technology tomorrow.

the gnaeus/nikador time loop thing with them continuously going through it to try to set things right, only to fail, until ours and castorice's help comes along, is making me Think Things

imagine if amphoreus as a whole was just basically like that. we, the trailblazers, can finally bring them Out of the time loop their world is stuck in because with our appearance, we can actually help them

time loops within time loops, memories within memories basically,,, but we have the ability to rewrite the said memories and experience it with them to Save them

To cover up the happenings of amity park, Danny comes up with a GENIUS idea (shut up Sam).

The small videos and pictures of him and the ghosts that managed to escape their city were dangerous if a hero were to look into their business.

With Tucker and Sam, they created a 'behind the scenes'.

(The video starts with Phantom. He's chasing something– someone, building's sweep past as the two duke it out midair.

That is, until someone yells.

"CUT!"

The background is taken away, leaving behind a green screen. Phantom and the ghost, now recognised as Ember Mclain, hang midair, dangling.

The camera zooms in on Phantom, as he slips off his white wig and scratches his scalp.

"Danny! Stop taking off the wig!" Someone yells off screen, to which Damny rolls his eyes to, screaming back a "but it's scratchy!".

The video stops there.)

They did NOT expect the amount of views this would get.

° just smol headcannons before I get swamped with work for the next week (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠)

Also, spoilers.

- Unknowingly, player has been given the title of 'Aeon of Guidance' (coined by wonderful @amimo3, thank you) and is generally known as the main driving force behind the Trailblazers' journey - (it was originally the Aeon of Akivili, which represents the Path of The Trailblaze, but they're dead last I checked, so for the sake of this AU we'll be the main force now but like in honor of the dead Aeon), to save planets from Stellarons.

- Naturally, as time progresses with you looking out for the team, they learned to trust your decisions more. Like, if there's a hard choice they have to make they kinda expect you to make the choice (and it is you making the choice from your screen), or like hinting at them what to do. Welt and Himeko seemd like untrusting at first, but after some time they warmed up a bit and consider you as the 3rd parent of these dolts (HUH).

- The Trailblazers now get more attention than they've ever had and it's a mix of pros and cons, really. People had been contacting them like crazy until Herta helped them from blocking some of the offending/nagging ones. And let's not even start at the countless gifts appearing like crazy at the places they've been into and the people that swarm them after saving their planet/ship (for now it's only the space station/belobog).

- At the Herta Space Station, Asta placed a small room dedicated for the new Aeon filled with offerings of food (which get cleaned everyday), trinkets and generally notes and books (it was mentioned by the Trailblazer that they like collecting books and other collectibles). Unlike the people from Belobog, however, the researches are not that deep in worshipping because they're still scientists (you know how in our world scientists don't believe in god rule because it may hamper in their research? kinda like that).

- At Belobog, which the Trailbalzers saved with the Aeon, people are much more open on focusing their worship on them. Bronya has built a small temple at the Administrative District and one at the Underworld (with the help of Wildfire and the Silvermane Guards). Due to the place being trapped in eternal winter, people mostly give small, metal trinkets akin to snowflake (guess who thought of making this a business? spoiler: it's sampo.), and the wealthier ones give books as offerings (books are pricey in Belobog, I'd assume?).

(Trailblazer collects all of these, don't worry. Gotta complete the inventory y'all.)

- Let's go at Xianzhou Luofu for a moment.

- I feel like at Xianzhou Luofu, people are not that.. open at worshipping a new Aeon, since they had an ugly past from the Aeon of Abundance, and now they mainly worship the Aeon of Hunt because it's the one who've helped them fight the Mara that plagues the population of said ship.

- But then the Trailblazers came, and they are aware of the new Aeon which saved Jarilo-VI, but again, new Aeon might just be a new danger for them that's why they initially rejected their request to help them from the Stellaron.

- Jing Yuan though, he's intrigued. First, the Divination Commission cannot get information about the new Aeon (Fu Xuan cannot see anything, like Mona trying to peek at Venti's constellation and her clothes got ripped instead). It's been millenia since the discovery of the last Aeon, and now, a new, young one? How? Why? And why only now they deigned to help the universe? Shouldn't they have done that a long time ago? He surmised that, given they've only appeared when the MC woke up, they must be connected with each other - and this influenced him to consider their offer.

- What he did not expect, however, was the Aeon's gaze lingering on him even the Trailblazers left the room.

MC and co. be like: What? Where their Grace?

Ppl inside the meeting room: *sweating bullets* What is happening? Why is an Aeon staring at us?

- THEY DIDN'T KNOW READER IS SIMPING FOR JING YUAN. SUE ME LOL

- And then POV switched to Dan Heng hurriedly leaving the express after learning Blade is at the Xianzhou, and then meeting Sushang and Luocha.

- Luocha, in his credit, easily masked his shock after feeling the intense gaze from this.. Aeon? Is this the new rumored Aeon of Guidance that is folowing the people from the Astral Express? (YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE THAT HE DOESN'T KNOW WHO DAN HENG REALLY IS.) Sushang at the other hand, almost fell on her knees, but wisely did not comment about it.

- Dan Heng has mixed feelings about the Aeon switching gaze to him and his current acquiantances, texting the MC but the message is still being unsent. For now, the three of them navigate the Mara-infested place towards the main city, hoping that Blade hasn't done anything to his *cough* found family *cough* yet.

- HE CAN ALSO FEEL THE AEON'S INTENSE GAZE AT LUOCHA LOL (re: simp re: re: le simp) he thought it was because of the coffin, lol, so naturally he's more inclined to be cautious of it. Sushang is busy guiding them, however, and seemed not aware of what's happening.

- After another fight his phone chimed, and he checked it hurriedly, sighing in relief when he learned they haven't met Blade. MC also checked if the Aeon was on him, because they lost them for quite some time now, and he told them he's with other people and he's on his way to them, and that yes, the gaze is directed at him right now.

PLS HOYO JUST LET MY BABIES MEET AGAIN

- Idk about y'all but I chose to drink the medicine that blind doctor from Xianzhou gave me - so I'll translate that as MC questioning the decision if they're really going to drink it, but like being 50/50 about it but it's you and there's no way you'd put them in danger, so they took the medicine at the end.

- For the Stellaron Hunters, you became some sort of.. an enigma, because Elio - for all his depiction of future this and destiny that, haven't really spoken even one thing about you. And that's, well, suspicious. I know, I know, they're not supposed to question Elio, but the thought lingers. Like, is Elio not talking about you because you're useless to their mission and for that, doesn't matter? Or there's some more deeper reason?

- While Kafka and Silver Wolf met the new Aeon, Blade was already at Xianzhou Luofo at that point, so he missed it. But then the cutscene of him talking with Jing Yuan and Yanqing was shown, and he felt it. That warm, comforting feeling Kafka explained to him at one point during their last talk. He took a quick glance at the General and his Lieutenant, smirking in sadistic glee at the brief expressions of confusion as they seem to feel the gaze too, albeit quick. (Because that scene happened before MC got to Xianzhou Luofo if I'm not mistaken).

Ah, man. Kinda hard to do HC during this time coz the game has barely any story about Xianzhou 🤣 This is sitting in my drafts for a week so better just post it before I dip to hibernate ig. Maybe I'll tackle about DragonHeng during the next story update 👌🏻 (AAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO DOWN BAD FOR HIM LORD PLS)

And I'm sorry for that user who tried to request something, but my feeble brain cannot connect it and still thinking of what to do 💀