Dick: I Made A Mistake

DPxDC What's the Big Deal with the Dead

TW, I guess: corpses and mild gore(?)

Due to his life circumstances, Danny is absolutely unfazed by the dead things. Be it a still barely warm body in the alleyway or a half-decomposed rat in the dumpster. He is just okay with them.

That is not to say he doesn't respect the dead, he does, but he respects the contents, not the package. He is polite and gentle with the shades of those recently passed away, he understands their burial preferences, and sometimes he helps the souls to either find their way to the afterlife or bring justice to the ones who murdered them, or anything else if they need it and he is able to do it.

Granted, he lives in Gotham, no one here is really that fazed by dead things, but what I'm trying to say is Danny lacks that first reaction kind of instinct, the disgust and repulsion and the horror that people feel when they see a dead body.

So, one night on patrol, one of the Bats, let's say Nightwing, finds him crouching beside a body. He can see the blood on the pavement and the bullet wound on the chest of said body, and this is yet another innocent life that has been taken, and he couldn't stop it, he was too late.

Meanwhile, Danny just turns his head towards him, waves, and goes, "s'up".

Ra's al Ghul, caught in a rare moment of weakness, is being pulled apart piece by piece.

A pair of mad scientists, just the kind of deranged he would hire normally, had built weapons that were...far more effective on him than he'd anticipated. Also, he hadn't been there to fight them at all. They were a true unknown, coming out of nowhere equipped to deal with the Demon Head himself.

Ironically, from what they had started shouting, he wasn't who they were hunting.

He'd been knocked unconscious by what could only be described as pure dumb luck.

He woke up strapped to a table, as those selfsame scientists started peeling him apart with scalpels.

His torture is interrupted when a young boy walks into the basement, sees what his torturers are doing to him, and screams.

Then the boy pivots, and off the top of his head, creates a distraction to pull his parents away from trying to see how Ra's works.

It's admirable; someone so untrained able to think so quickly. It's clumsy; the equivalent of a child pointing at something and screaming as a distraction.

It's just what was required for the boy to remove his restraints and hand him...a vial of the purest Lazarus Water he's ever seen.

"You're already like, really liminal, so it shouldn't kill you, just heal you. But you need to drink it fast, before they come back!"

And like that, it clicks.

The mad scientists are hunting someone as 'liminal' as him. Their son's eyes are glowing green.

Normally, Ra's would drink the Lazarus Waters and slaughter the scientists and anyone they were allied with.

But.

This is a debt.

He'd been waiting for the two scientists to leave so he could free himself, but this boy had stepped in.

Now he owes the child.

He can tell just by looking at the boy that killing his parents is not going to be considered paying back the debt.

However.

This boy is in clear and present danger with those two lunatics about.

So.

As the adult, is it not Ra's responsibility to make sure the boy is safe, whether he wants it or not?

Instead of killing the scientist parents, he knocks the boy unconscious and takes him to Nanda Parbat.

After all, there is nowhere safer than under the Demon Head's protection.

Just to be sure, he adopts the boy as his grandchild.

Now nobody will dare to touch the little hero.

~~~~~~

Danny wakes up in an assassin compound so soaked in Ectoplasm that he can't phase through it, and the ectoplasm in question is so contaminated that it's making him sick, so he can't punch or blast through it either.

He's trapped in a gilded cage by a madman who's insisting that it's all "for Daniel's own good", and his only chance at escaping is telling the little kid, Damian, stories about Amity. Stories about his friends and family.

Stories that he can't make obvious are cries for help, but entertaining enough for a kid to pay attention to.

Stories that will, hopefully, make it to the kid's father.

Who is, apparently, the Goddamn Batman.

Somewhere along the way, the kid starts calling them brothers. It sounds like the kid believes it with his whole heart.

And Danny...Danny's too selfish to correct it.

He lets Damian believe that Danny is his older brother by blood.

~~~~~~

Damian has an older brother, hidden away in Nanda Parbat, who is sickly and weak, and to whom the Demon Head himself is indebted.

Damian has always thought that Danyal was in the best place for him; away from the unnamed hunters that Grandfather said stalked him outside of the compound.

Recently, though, Damian is. Rethinking this.

Why was Danyal so sickly? Why did he always look so sad and desperate?

Perhaps it is time to tell father of his sickly older brother who physically could never meet Grandfather and Mother's standards to meet the Bat.

Phantom of the Manor

AKA "The Batfam unintentionally start giving ritual offerings to the Phantom. Danny, who's been mistaken as the Phantom of the Opera, is wondering why his hoodie pockets are full of tomato slices??" prompt idea!

Headcanon that Ghosts become more powerful the more people believe in them, kind of like deities. Danny's never really had to deal with the whole "ritualistic sacrifices to Bloody Mary" or "superstitious prayers against Davey Jones" because Phantom is a Hafta. Danny doesn't need people to believe in him or worship him.

So, he's never gotten a ritual offering before.

Which is why he's absolutely baffled when he shoves his hand into his hoodie pocket to grab his phone and feels something... squishy. And cold. Both Sam and Tucker scream as Danny jolts to his feet with a squeamish shriek. He damn near Goes Ghost as he tries to tear off his hoodie, regardless of the staring mall-walkers. Danny finally manages to fling the hoodie onto their table, scrambling to Sam and Tucker's sides, trying to breath through a panicked: "There'ssomethinginmypocket!!"

Sam carefully pokes around until she finds... squished tomato slices? They're oily and salted like a tomato caprese without the cheese. Which is an interesting choice for a snack. You'd think Danny would at least use a Ziplock bag or something?

("Ancients! Of course, I didn't put them there, Sam!")

Fast-forward a couple of weeks. Danny's going insane because why the hell are there tomatoes literally everywhere? Every couple of days (or hours, depending on the day), he finds different types of tomatoes all over the place. In bed when he wakes up. In his jean pockets at school. Even in the shower, he'll be blindly trying to find the shampoo bottle and come across a handful of grape tomatoes. He can't. Handle. It. Anymore. Danny's going to become the "Tomato Man" at school from how often he randomly pulls out tomatoes from his pockets. Like he needs another reason for Dash to mock him.

The last straw was when Danny was Full Ghost and felt something... itchy in his suit. He knew before he saw it. Danny tentatively pulled the sleeve of his suit open, silently praying that it wasn't what he thought it was, and- yeah. There's V-8 smeared from his goddamn elbow to wrist. He had to fight with tomato juice in his suit for several hours. And that's it; Danny literally can't take it anymore. He goes to Frostbite, begging the Yeti to help him with his Tomato Problem.

Only to be told he's receiving offerings. Which are apparently incredibly sacred and should be appreciated. (It'd be easier to appreciate if it was, like, cash or something. Maybe a Nintendo Switch. Instead, his patrons are worshipping him by offering... tomatoes. Great.)

So, clearly, the only option is to go straight to the source (i.e., his patrons) and tell them to Fucking Stop Giving Me Tomatoes. The next time he feels something weighty in his pocket (gross!), he follows the thready connection of his worshippers through a portal.

And Danny steps out in his full Ghost Regalia (because clearly they're worshipping Phantom, right? So Danny can't exactly show up in ripped jeans and his favorite NASA hoodie). The family sits at a dinner table... which is a little weird, since he'd expected an altar or something. But even weirder is the beady, predatory that look borderline-violent staring at him from everybody at the table. There's an uncomfortable silence more tense than dinners at Vlad's mansion.

Then, Danny carefully scoops out the soupy, baked grape tomatoes from his pocket and dumps them on the table. He doesn't wait for them to question it, just points to the tomatoes and says, "I appreciate the offerings, really, but it's gotta stop. It's gross. I have to wash tomato juice out of my clothes every day. If you're gonna leave an offering, no. More. Tomatoes. Please."

The oldest man seems jolted out of his stupor.

"Excuse me, but could you please explain why you've come to our home?" The man asks cordially. (As if Danny couldn't see him carefully gripping his steak knife like a throwing dart. And that's just rude, honestly. Danny was invited.)

"Uh, I'm Phantom? You literally give me offerings every day. Again, I appreciate it, I never thought I'd have diehard fans, but I don't even really like tomatoes. I mean, they're fine in salsa and stuff, but even I won't eat pocket-tomatoes."

"I believe there may be a misunderstanding. We don't worship a deity named Phantom nor have we left any offerings." The oldest says. He seems like he's about to continue when one of the black-haired adults interrupts him with a nervous, "Uh, B? About that..."

So. Yeah. It turns out Dick Grayson and Jason Todd forced the family to watch Phantom of the Opera, which spawned the joke of offering any food they don't like (i.e., tomatoes) to "the Phantom" (i.e., their trashcan). More than half the family doesn't like tomatoes and Alfred uses it as a punishment for breaking something, overworking, etc. They'd gotten pretty sneaky about scraping their leftovers into the bin but had gotten into a habit of saying "this one's for the Phantom, a treat for the Phantom," or something incredibly stupid like that.

Danny's just... a little relieved, honestly? Because he's literally fifteen and wouldn't really know what to do with followers if he had them. Plus, now he doesn't have to worry about waking up with tomatoes in his bed or making excuses for all his tomato-hoarding while at school. (Which was not necessarily the right thing to mention to Bruce "Serial Adopter" Wayne. Practically the whole table turned to stare at Bruce when Danny mentioned he's apparently an underage deity, waiting for Bruce to sweep in with a well-executed, "Well, it's getting late. Why don't you stay the night?" Because Bruce apparently can't help himself from collecting another black-haired, blue-eyed kid.)

Return to sender (dc x dp)

There was a box set right in front of his door. That was already pretty unusual, since Danny had just moved in, and and gotten done with boxes and he knew he hadn't had anything delivered here.

"Let's get you inside," Danny muttered as he got his key out of his pocket.

Unlocking the door, he picked it up and made his way in. He set the box down on the small kitchen table before grabbing a knife from the cabinet. He sat down and set to cutting the tape along the opening.

Peeling back the flaps, he took a peak at the contents only to be faced with a mound of yellow and black sparkly tissue paper, with a letter on top.

"What do we have here?" he muttered to himself, as he took the envelope out of the box.

Ripping it open, he got a small greeting card out. It had a yellow smiley face on it with the word "Smile!" printed above it. He flipped it open, and his eyes fixed on the printed text that said "Because today is your day!" Underneath it, written in chicken-scratch was written the following: "Looks like the bat has a new signal. At least mommy and daddy won't know how fast you replaced them!" it was signed with a simple J and yet another smiley face.

Danny frowned. "Weird."

Then, he peeled back the paper to find a taxidermied yellow-and-black bird Danny couldn't recognize, with its wings broken.

"This is definitely not mine," Danny said as he looked at the bird. Hopefully the real owner of this wasn't going to be too disappointed it had been this damaged in transit.

Danny took up the box to look at the delivery address, only to find that while this was for his apartment, the name of the receiver was marked as "Duke Marlon Thomas". It took one quick google search to find a phone number. Danny thanked whoever the sender was for including a middle name as it narrowed the search greatly. Dialling the number, Danny got up to get himself a glass of water. As he got the glass out, the line connected.

"Hello?" he heard a surprisingly young voice say. Well, assuming apparently made an ass of Danny. Maybe taxidermy really did appeal to all ages.

"Hi, my name's Danny. I think I got your package by accident."

"My package?" The guy on the other side asked, perplexdely.

"Yeah, a big box with a bird in it?" Danny answered. "Listen, man I'm sorry, I think the wings broke during transit, I swear it was already like that when I opened it-"

"What bird?" Now the guy sounded even more confused.

Well now, Danny was starting to get confused. "A taxidermied black-and-yellow bird?" Danny sounded out, then he grabbed the note and let his eyes go over it again. "There was a note too, I opened it, sorry about that." Danny winced, before trying for a joke to hopefully get the guy to soften up on him. "Whoever that J- friend is, he's got a weird sense of humour."

"J- friend?" the voice on the other side of the phone said. Guess, the joke hadn't gone over well, because his voice had gone tense.

"Yeah," Danny answered withholding a sigh, damn his curiosity. Opening other people' letters was not only a gross invasion of privacy but also a federal crime. Hopefully the guy wouldn't stay mad too long. "It was signed with the letter J and a smiley face."

"Whoever you are," said the guy, and the urgency in his voice had Danny straightening up. "You need to get out of here right now."

"What-?"

Just then, the door to Danny's apartment was blown open.

"I hope you're ready, birdie," a voice outside sounded, before a spindly man in a purple suit, green hair and sickly-looking skin walked in.

"Because you and me are going to have so much fun."

Okay, but what if Danny Fenton just stops aging? Like, he's forever 14. Now imagine that "I won't invite you to my birthday" becomes his go to threat to his friends and family when he's not in the mood and it slowly branches out to everyone. Just:

Danny, pouting and eepy: If you don't stop, I won't invite you to my birthday.

Some overpowered ghost: Why the fuck would I want to go to your birthday?

Pandora, CW, Frostbite, a now grown up Sam, Jazz, and Tucker: *Appears and breaks the stranger* YOU DARE????

Like, Danny is just forever a child and behaves like it, while the rest of the cast become more parental over time. So his childish threat cuts deep to his people and if not to his people, means his adult people are now on high alert for why their "baby" is upset. And don't misunderstand, childish doesn't mean naive or stupid. He's still an overpowered witty fucker that can problem solve better than most adults.

Damian: This is bad

Jon: What is it?

Damian: I'm pretty sure the guy in the other soccer team was threatening me, but I didn't hear it because I was too busy staring at his thighs.

Jon: .....We're in different time zones, you know that? It's three in the morning for me here. When you call me at this time, it's ussually a emergency not a gossip session. I'm tried Damian, and I have class in the morning. I can't be a good exchange student if I'm falling asleep in class.

Damian: So? All my best work is at three am. Do better.

Jon: *sigh* Okay so the other guy is hot. What's his name?

Damian: Daniel Fenton. He's a foward. He's so attractive, I forget the human language when he speaks and only hear "Blah blah blah " but in a dreamy sigh kind of blah.

Jon: Uh-huh. And why was he threatening you?

Damian: I have no idea, I was too busy watching his lips move, and his thighs flexed as he stretched.

Jon: Right. Well, I'm sure once the soccer tournament is over you won't have to see him every again-

Damian: I think I asked his mother for his hand in marriage yesterday. I can't remember.

Jon: *Sigh* Of course you did.

Marvel Being a Terrible “Dad”

In the league’s point of view, Billy has to be a terrible dad… and if he’s not their dad… why is a grown ass man hanging around with these kids? So for peace of mind, they assume Jr. and Mary are his kids. I mean, they kinda look like him. Kinda. Like, I can already see a good portion of them not really liking that he’s letting Freddy and Mary fight bloodthirsty monsters and villains. But, even the heroes that don’t mind that have to take a minute to process Marvel congratulating Mary for going off and doing something extremely reckless:

*They all just watched as Mary flew into an alien spaceship to take it down from the inside out. They knew nothing about the ship, just that it was hostile.*

Mary: *Flies back down from the ship, covered in soot. Lands by Marvel.*

Superman: *Flies over to them* “That was extremely reck—”

Billy: *cuts off* “Mary, that was amazing!”

Superman: “Cap, that wasn’t amazing. It was extremely reckless! She could’ve gotten himself killed!” *gestures to Freddy wildly.*

Billy: “But she didn’t!” *gives thumbs up* “Come on, let’s get victory ice cream.”

*The two fly off*

or

*All of them are talking about their kids, eating together at a little lunch table in the Watchtower’s cafeteria like middle schoolers*

Superman: “I wouldn’t let Jon fight any of my villains alone. Most of them, anyways.”

Billy: “Why? Is he not strong enough?”

Superman: “Well, I’m sure he is, but I don’t want him to get hurt, or traumatized. Being a hero can be harsh at times. He’s just a kid.”

Billy: “So? Just cause he’s a kid doesn’t mean that he can’t fight. Just let him.”

Superman: “What? I can’t just let him. How would you feel if Junior or Mary had to fight Black Adam on their own?”

Billy: *shrugs* “Depends. Are they gonna fight him individually or together?”

Batman: *Eating a bat shaped sandwich, made by Alfred* “Individually.”

Billy: “Oh, yeah. Sure. I could trust them to handle Adam alone. I don’t think they could incapacitate him though. A couple times, when I’ve been busy, they’ve held him off for me until I get there.”

Flash: “You just let two little kids (Freddy and Mary look like pre-teens) go out and fight Black Adam? The same Black Adam that destroyed like a quarter of Metropolis in a day?”

Billy: “When you put it like that, it sounds crazy.” *Eats spaghettios*

Green Lantern: “Dude, it is crazy.”

Billy: “Wha? No it’s not. Wondy, when’d you start training for being a whole Amazonian warrior princess?”

Wonder Woman: “When I started adolescence.” *Eats ice cream*

Billy: “Seeeee? It’s fine.”

Martian Manhunter: “How old exactly are Mary and Junior?” *Also eats ice cream*

Billy: “Mary’s eleven and Junior’s twelve, they’re close enough.”

*All except Marvel exchange slightly concerned glances*

or

*Marvel and Junior are bickering next to one of the windows of the Watchtower.*

Black Canary: *Minding her own business and walks past them.*

Billy: “How about I slam your head through this window so we can really see if you can breathe in space, huh?”

*Canary pauses, and wow. Junior didn’t even flinch. That’s actually crazy. The bickering just got worse. This really doesn’t look good from a licensed therapist’s point of view.*

dp x dc prompt #34

Everyone always says that having a good reaction time is a great thing in a town where ghosts attack daily. Nobody ever warned him that sometimes it’s a bad thing to punch first and ask questions later.

Danny gets startled by Bane while wandering around Gotham, and punts him four blocks into a brick wall. Danny scrambles to get gone before anyone notices, but unfortunately for him, Gotham has eyes everywhere. And one Red Robin cannot believe that a twink of a guy just sent one of their physically strongest rogues flying like it was nothing.

Hop Jon over (dp x dc)

"Hey mister, are you dead?" was the first thing Danny heard as he found his way back to consciousness. His body vehemently protested the move by alighting every single one of his nerve ending on fire and Danny groaned.

"Mister?"

Danny's ribs were killing him, or at least they felt like they were, and he would know. He cracked his eyes open to find a small boy crouching over him with his hands on his knees and his blue eyes wide in curiosity.

"Who-" Danny croaked.

"My name's Johnatan like grandpa, but everyone calls me Jon," the kid started babbling. "I live in Metropolis, do you know Metropolis? It's the biggest city in the world. My parents work there, they're reporters but now it's summer break so I'm with Grandma and Grandpa. You fell through the old barn from the sky. Are you an alien, like Superman?"

"Ugh," Danny said as he closed his eyes again.

"Mr. Alien, are you dead again now?"

"Yes," Danny said as he put his arm over his face, wishing he could just Not Exist.

"You're lying," the kid stated confidently. "Dead people don't talk."

"They do too," Danny mumbled as he raised his head off the floor to look at the kid properly.

"Do not!"

"Do too."

"I'm telling Grandma you're a liar," the kid sing-longed before bolting out of Danny's field of vision.

With a thud, Danny let his head fall back down. Welp, it wasn't like he was going anywhere, why not invite more people over to witness this absolute embarrassment.

Happy April fools day!!

(Don’tkillspls)

If you are lost with the context check the valentine’s special ;]

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