Omega: You’re Offered 50,000 Credits But If You Accept It, The Person You Hate Most In The Entire Galaxy

People who can write, I definitely want a fic of the entire batch having it out in the training room hahaaaa

I totally agree with everything, if I’m allowed to add:

The first time Echo witnesses their “conflict resolution,” he’s shocked and def pulls the older brother card to get them to chill out

However, it takes approximately two days for Echo and Tech to have a sass off that rivals those of Tech and Crosshair (Crosshair enjoys it wayyyy too much)

Hunter knows that pulling rank is a sure fire way to shut down any argument with Echo, but Echo is so obedient about it that it makes him feel bad, so he doesn’t.

Wrecker is scared to argue with Echo. Crosshair is too, but he won’t admit it. That makes their arguments extra salty

Thinking about Hunter and Crosshair resorting to throwing hands and Tech and Wrecker bickering has me cooking up some headcanons about their methods of… ✨conflict resolution✨

Tech and Crosshair have a sass off/roast fest (Hunter has to intervene like 90% of the time, Wrecker pulls out the popcorn)

Hunter and Wrecker have staring contests to rival that of Jedi padawans trying to mind trick each other

Wrecker and Crosshair throw things at each other while having a shouting match

Hunter and Tech actually have logical arguments like sane human beings, but with a whole lot of gnashing of teeth because most of the time they both have really good points and they’re stubborn af (strategist vs genius, you know?) (every once in a great while Hunter gets frustrated enough to pull rank lol)

If three of them have issues, no. 4 tells them to either stop being morons or take it to the training room

If all four of them have a problem, well… that’s what the aforementioned training room is for lol

“No matter how badly led, ridiculously under equipped, under appreciated, no matter how doomed their mission, they take a bizarre and quite beautiful pride in at least being screwed more than everybody else and doing it with style. They seem to do what they do for themselves. It’s not a job. It’s a calling.” —Anthony Bourdain

This quote just reminds me of the bad batch 💛

I'm really tired of people criticizing Star Wars for its simple approach to good and evil, because that ignores the point.

Star Wars is not about morally complex situations where it's hard to tell who the villains are.

Star Wars is about how easy it is to become one of the villains.

The more that I think about the early episodes of TBB S3, the funnier they get to me. Like

First we have Crosshair, who is really getting to know Omega for the first time. His only real interactions with her in the past have involved his brothers being EXTRA protective of her, so in his head Omega is probably just this poor, scared, naive little kid. And then one day she just pulls up to his prison cell and is like “what’s up, loser, we’re getting out of here” and then proceeds to sneak him out of a high security government lab under the nose of the emperor himself (she knows our battle plans?? Of course she knows all of our battle plans, that’s a normal thing to teach a 12 year old…) Not to mention the fact that Omega gambled in a bar and won more credits than either of them had probably ever seen in their lives, so that they could bribe the space TSA into getting them off world (WHY does the kid know how to gamble). Not that Crosshair is in any position to judge someone’s parenting, but he has QUESTIONS.

Omega, meanwhile, is for the first time getting the full Crosshair Experience, complete with every bit of sarcasm, snark, and sass that the man has been bottling up on Tantiss, and she is not having it. No, Crosshair, I don’t really know how to fly this shuttle, why don’t you quit your backseat flying and get your butt up here and do this yourself? No, Crosshair, we cannot open fire on civilians in an airport, I thought that was just an inhibitor chip thing for you. No, Crosshair, we are NOT LEAVING OUR MAN-EATING HOUND ALONE AND UNSUPERVISED ON A RESIDENTIAL PLANET.

And then you have Hunter, who hasn’t been thinking clearly for five months and who probably is living off a diet of spiked lemonade and sour patch kids (to match the bitterness inside him), who went from thinking “oh yeah we’re gonna settle down on Space Greece” to “Wrecker, that one crime syndicate called us back, if we murder this one guy for them then they MIGHT give us some info on Omega, wheels up in 10”

And poor Wrecker finds himself as The Responsible Adult for the first time in his life, which is incredibly confusing and a little bit scary and Hunter, you are TOO CLOSE to the edge of that cliff!! He’s never really believed in vegetables before but Echo says they’re good for you so he spends every moment that he’s not trying to keep Hunter from starting a second interplanetary war over the disappearance of his kid attempting to convince Hunter to try an apple or something.

And then it all culminates in this very tense, dramatic moment where they’re all staring at each other and Omega is like “yay now we can all get therapy!” and Wrecker is like “Echo come back I can’t do this on my own anymore” and Hunter is like “you can’t commit fratricide in front of the kid, you can’t commit fratricide in front of the kid” and Crosshair is like “TAKE YOUR SCARY CHILD BACK” and if that’s not peak Bad Batch then I don’t know what is

I wasn’t a die-hard Tech Lives believer (more of a “I HOPE Tech Lives” believer) but the end of the show has me grieving hard all over again, so here’s my little ode to Tech based on things I’ve noticed about him from rewatching the show:

Tech LOVES his brothers, and he genuinely misses Crosshair. When he has his heart to heart with Omega in the ipsium cavern, the way that he mentions Crosshair—even though that wasn’t even really what they were discussing—shows how often Crosshair is on his mind, so much so that he can’t really talk about people leaving and changing without bringing him up. When they get the Plan 88 from Crosshair, Tech is vocal and insistent about doing whatever they can to bring Crosshair back—because “he is still our brother.”

Tech is incredibly moral. Not that he’s any more moral than I think generally TBB is, but he’s not afraid to speak up when he sees something that he disagrees with fundamentally. “The systematic termination of the Jedi is a big one for me.” “There’s a fundamental different between taking fire in battle and being used for target practice.” Even in just the first episode, we see how firm his opinions are, based on what he believes: that people are people, that HIS BROTHERS are people, that they deserve better, that there is such a thing as right and wrong.

Tech may be practical, but that doesn’t make him any less crazy than his brothers—in fact, I would argue he is one of the more unhinged members of the bad batch. His plans and ideas see everything factually, factoring in risk not as an emotional factor but as a numerical one. He knows their skills, and what they are capable of, and he pushes them to those capabilities, even if the resulting strategy is absolutely insane. The best part is, as insane as he may be, his brothers trust him, because, as Tech himself said, he is seldom wrong.

Tech has a beautiful sense of wonder and awe for the world around him. How many times do we see him go wide-eyed as he encounters something that absolutely fascinates him—even if that thing is a Zillo beast that just ate an entire Imperial crew.

Tech is INSANE. Not unhinged, like I said earlier, but skill-wise, ability-wise, he is an absolute powerhouse. I will forever be grateful to the writers of TBB who gave us a techy, intelligent character who is not your average scrawny computer guy that we get in action movies. You have to have a lot of guts to be the guy in your squad who turns your back on the fight to bend over a computer and hack into a file or break an encryption or alter the programming—already a delicate operation, but with the added risk of getting shot with your back turned. He frickin wields double blasters so that he can shoot more clankers more efficiently (if that’s not practical Tech, I don’t know what is). He DOESN’T WEAR LEG ARMOR SO THAT HE CAN CARRY HIS TOOLS WITH HIM INTO THE FIELD. In “Faster,” we see his hand inching towards his blaster, ready to defend and protect the second it’s necessary—and you know he would’ve beaten anyone to the draw. He fought a group of Imperial troopers!!! With a broken leg!!!!!

Tech was amazing, and I hate that he’s dead, that we never got to see him grow old, that he never saw Crosshair again. But WHAT A LIFE HE LIVED.

For real though, it’s so on brand that the first thing Crosshair does when he meets Tech’s girlfriend is almost fight her

My favorite part of this episode was Phee meeting Crosshair and immediately giving him shit

Echo’s First Moments with TBB, Part 3

Echo: *banging on bathroom door* Hunterrrr, hurry up!! You’ve been in there 30 mins already!!

Hunter: *opens door, comes out of bathroom* sorryyyyy, you know, more hair, takes longer…

Crosshair: *pushes past them both into the bathroom, slams the door shut*

Echo: wha—HEY!! Crosshair, it’s my turn, I’ve been waiting!!

*shower starts running*

Echo: CROSSHAIR!!!

*Summertime Sadness starts blasting from inside*

Omega: I went boating with Lyana today and we saw a sea turtle!

Echo: nice! Reminds me of this mission I did as an ARC trooper on this water planet. Fives and I found this turtle and we swam after it. But as we were swimming it got speared by these locals that took us captive. Turns out they were cannibals. Tied us to a spit and put us over the fire to roast. Comms were out and we were miles from camp so I thought we were gonners. Fives got us out by convincing the locals that we would be tastier if they fattened us up first. Then we snuck laxatives into all their food and used the window to escape back to camp. Made it back in time for the start of a battle against the separatists. Ha, good times.

Omega:

Hunter:

Wrecker:

Tech:

Echo: pass the peas, please.

Echo would 1000% drop the craziest lore in the middle of dinner with the batch and then just ask them to pass the peas and continue on like nothing happened, meanwhile the batch is like “you did what????”

Imagine the bad batch in a Miss Congeniality type situation

Let's be real here for a second:

The first thing he did when he got out of cryo was taking them through the cooling vents and across a foot-wide space PVC pipe a thousand feet in the air to escape.

They didn't even make it all the way to "jump without question onto a semi-wild flying animal's back" before the Batch was making plans to keep Echo for themselves.