Haylee-bb - IDKwhatimdoing/random Fuckery

Ao3 tags!!!

Been a while since I've done one of these so here you go

sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time

Tag Time!

"The Sins of the Father" Invalidates the Individual

I'm a woman with PCOS, which means I have an excessive amount of body hair, most noticeably on my face. This is something I struggle with a lot, and my mom once apologized to me for it. She told me a story of something she did when she was younger that could have led to this happening as a sort of "Sins of the Father" type thing.

I won't get into the details of that discussion as it was very personal, but it did get me thinking about the concept as a whole, and it's one of the many things I've been taught growing up with religion that, upon reflection, is super fucked up.

Using myself as an example, not only is it unfair that I would be punished for something I had absolutely nothing to do with, but I also don't like what this implies about my personal autonomy. My problems are my own. My struggles, my pain, are my own and not something to be used as a punishment for someone else. I know my mom didn't in any way mean to be invalidating. This is just a part of her beliefs, and I respect that, but it did make me think.

How many people open up about their pain, only to have that pain taken over by someone else?

How audacious to think that you, a person who has not experienced what I have and do not know how it affects me, feel those affects more deeply than I do. And that is what this implies, that this problem I have is somehow more your cross to bare than mine. It's insulting.

It is also so unnecessary. Religion already places so much guilt onto our shoulders, we are born in sin, we live in sin, we die in sin, and the only way to escape is to live our lives constantly apologizing for ourselves. Don't add to that weight by taking burdens that aren't yours.

"are you perturbed with me" works well I think. Try being upset when you say/hear the word 'perturbed' unironically used in a sentence.

They should make a "are you mad at me" that is taken neutrally and informationally every time and doesn't make everything worse when you ask it

Can we stop using "still lives with their parents" or "unemployed" or "doesn't have a drivers license" or "didn't graduate high school" as an insult or evidence that someone is a bad person? Struggling with independence or meeting milestones is not a moral failing.

I don't have fictional crushes, I have fictional "children". I see a character that most people would simp for and I mentally adopt them. Most of the time these characters are WAY older than me (sometimes several centuries) but do I care? Of course not don't make me laugh! I see a character in need of love and support, a damaged and hurt bean and I say MINE! I have done this more times than I can remember and if I did tally up my many fictional kids I'd have enough for a substantial orphanage. I have taken the meaning of mom friend to whole new level.