Just Came Up With A Really Good 4 Word Cooking Horror Story But Idk If You Guys Are Ready For It

A dishwasher that turns tupperware lids into socks that you don't own

"Orc" Bacon

“No, it isn’t made from orcs - but for orcs.” - Heroes’ Feast, p. 156

Until I found this recipe, I’d never thought of trying to dress up bacon. After all, bacon is bacon! However, “Orc” Bacon brings a tasty spin to this popular classic.

Coated with a savoury-sweet glaze and absolutely the easiest thing to make in Heroes’ Feast so far; this tasty treat is a great snack to prepare for a table of hungry adventurers or for yourself when life gets busy!

Try snacking on them with a side of the Yawning Portal Buttermilk Biscuits to really immerse yourself in that tavern vibe!

See below for my notes on the results and for some helpful tips and tricks when making this yourself! Get Heroes’ Feast here: https://dnd.wizards.com/heroes-feast

Prep: 1 min               Cook: 30 mins*               Total: ~30 mins

* Varies based on how crispy you like your bacon.

Ingredients (serves 4 as a snack):

1 lbs. (450 g) thick-cut bacon*

3 tbsp. (38 g) light-brown sugar

½ tsp. (1 g) freshly ground black pepper

1 tsp. (2 g) garlic powder

2 tbsp. (30 ml) orange juice

* I used regular cut bacon instead of thick-cut with no issues.

Start by preheating the oven to 375℉ (190℃) with a rack in the middle of the oven. Line a large rimmed baking sheet with foil. Coat a large wire rack with nonstick cooking spray and set it in the foil-lined pan.

Next, arrange the bacon slices on the rack, laying them tight against each other so the entire pound fits (top-left).

Roast the bacon strips until they render some of their fat and shrink a bit, about 12 minutes (top-right).

NOTE: I struggled to fit all of the regular cut bacon onto the rack even after cramming everything as tight as possible (rip those pieces at the top). This may be different for thick-cut but I ended up having three extra slices to spare.

While the bacon renders, in a small bowl, mix together the brown sugar, pepper, garlic, and orange juice.

Lightly brush the rendered slices with about half of the brown sugar mixture (top-left).

Continue roasting until the brown sugar adheres to the bacon and the bacon appears glossy, about 7 minutes (top-right).

Using tongs, turn over the pieces.

Lightly brush the slices with the remaining brown sugar mixture and continue roasting until the brown sugar mixture adheres to the bacon and looks glossy, 5 to 7 minutes.

Transfer slices to a serving plate and serve warm.

NOTE: For this last part, feel free to roast the slices for as long as it takes them to your preferred crispness level. The slices above roasted for about 11 minutes.

Overall, I would give this recipe a 5/5. I couldn't personally see myself eating these with eggs in the morning (clashing flavours) but it does make for a nice sweet and savoury snack!

Like I mentioned in the intro, the flavour and ease to throw it together make it a good choice to bring to a D&D session or make as a nerdy snack for yourself when you’re busy, no matter what level your cooking skill is at.

Watch out though! They’re super sticky so make sure to have plenty of napkins on hand.

Trick or Treat :D

thank you! it's not candy, but have a beignet!

the powdered sugar more than makes up for it 😁

Fun Facts About Honey

- Honey is mostly sugar (WoW!) it is 80% sugar and 20% water (double WoW!)

- There are over 20,000 species of bees, but only 4 make HONEY

-Honey is the ONLY food that contains all the substances you need to survive (Including WATER)

-Children under the age of 1 should not eat honey… why? because sometimes it contains bad stuff called botulism and can cause them to get botulism poisoning (that sucks, even infants should taste the deliciousness that is honey)

-Honey will crystallize under optimum temperatures (this has a lot to do with how you store it)

-Bees produce honey to eat during the winter when there are no flowers and no nectar for them.

-A honeybee would only need an ounce of honey to be able to fuel a flight around the world (this makes for a very cultural bee!)

-A typical beehive can make up to 400 pounds of honey a year! (Wowza!)

Attention new tumblr users! I am making some French toast sticks in the the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap, wake me up in five minutes to flip them over.

I was making spaghetti and I woke up mid-cooking and set an alarm for when the pasta was done.

“what’s the worst fruit” i hope you fucking die im strangling you what the hell is wrong with you. ‘the worst fruit’… has god not made all of these fruits in the same light???? cunt

I saw ypur post about D&D, did something happen? You kept saying it was a terrible idea and now I'm scared lol

unfortunately yes. @leidensygdom made a really good summary post about it here.