hiekoo

Latest Posts by hiekoo

the entire party thinks we're dating

cw: 4.5k wc, female reader, sendo registers oliver on one of those rent a boyfriend for a day websites as a prank and you just so happen to need a date for another wedding you really don't want to attend on your own—

When you swing the door open, you can’t help but blink a few times at the sight before your eyes.

“Oh”, you say.

The man staring back with a lopsided smile, hands buried in the pockets of what looks like an expensive suit, raises his brows.

“Oh?”, he parrots, “thought we could start with hello, nice to meet you”.

“Sorry, it’s just…”, you tilt your head, “I get why you’re so expensive. They weren’t kidding with that description”.

When you leave the door open and waltz back into the living room, Oliver takes it as an invitation to come in.

“Can you remind me what that description said?”, the sound of the door being softly pushed closed echoes in the silent room while you’re busy checking yourself out in the mirror above the couch.

“Friendly, tall, incredibly charming, devastatingly handsome. Something like that”.

He smirks, catching your gaze in the mirror.

“And you just validated all that, huh?”.

You click your tongue.

“We’ll see about the friendly, incredibly charming part”.

“Devastatingly handsome it is then, I’ll take the compliment. You look really good in that dress, by the way”.

“Don’t”, you scoff, “you’re too hot to be that much of a clichè”.

He hums, amused.

“Not too hot to tell the truth. You know, for someone so wary, it’s surprising you’d let me pick you up at your place”.

“Not her place”, Chisako’s voice startles him and you sigh, turning to the mirror once more: your hair is being exceptionally stubborn.

“Listen… what’s your name again?”, your best friend eyes him up and down, hands on her hips.

“I’m Oliver”, he replies, seemingly amused. You meet his gaze in the mirror once more.

“Listen, Oliver. You do anything to her, anything, and I’ll kill you. Won’t even go through the fuss of pressing charges, you hear me?”.

“That’s sweet”.

She narrows her gaze.

“You think I’m kidding? Hands to yourself and don’t try anything funny”.

“Hey, just a quick reminder, she rented me”.

“You, don’t talk to my friend like that”, you finally whip around, exasperated, “and you, please don’t scare my very expensive date away yet. I still need him”.

With a scoff, Chisako lightly slaps your finger away from her chest.

“Fine. Share your location and call me if you need anything. Keep your phone with you”, you soften when you read the sincere worry swarming in her eyes and smile.

“Deal. Thank you”, with a deep breath, you grab your purse and take an uncertain step back, “do I look okay?”.

“More than okay, you’re…”.

“Beautiful”.

You both look at him, skeptical.

“You don’t have to do that”.

“Do what?”, Oliver chuckles, “let me guess, you think that was also a lie”.

“Hot and smart? You really are the whole package”, with a scoff, you walk past him and toward the front door, where you slip your very pretty, very uncomfortable heels on.

Still evidently amused, he opens the door for you and offers his arm to walk you down the stairs of the old apartment complex. Chisako waits on the balcony, arms folded and resting on the black railing. You look up and she waves, making you chuckle.

When Oliver leans forward to open the car door for you, you look at him astonished.

“You came… in a porsche?”.

He grins.

“I mean, you did pay for the whole package”.

Right.

“So, we’re gonna need a story, right? Am I your boyfriend or are we just casually dating?”, the smaller space you’re now sharing is ruthless in making you notice the details you couldn’t catch in your friend’s apartment. The man starting the engine and now sitting dangerously close to you smells unfairly good and the deep rumble of his voice, low, intimate, feels as soft as velvet. It almost resembles the purr of a big cat.

“Boyfriend. We met about two months ago and only recently made it official”.

“Sounds good to me”, he briefly glances at you with a smile, “whose wedding is it, anyway?”.

You grimace.

“An old colleague. She’s never gonna buy this but we can do our best”.

“Are you doubting me or yourself right now?”.

With a snort, you gesture vaguely.

“You’re an incredibly attractive guy who drives a sports car. No one at that wedding is going to believe I could bag that”.

“It’s my job to make sure they do”, Oliver clicks his tongue, “besides, I think I’d have a much harder time charming you. I’m pretty easy to bag”.

His absolutely serious tone makes you melt into a chuckle, which he seems to appreciate. Head slightly turned, you focus on his profile for a brief moment. The bridge of his nose, full lips, long lashes. You wonder if he’s using contacts. He must be, right? There’s no way he’d be blessed with those eyes too, among everything else.

“You’re staring”, he mutters, still focused on the road. The playful lilt of his tone makes you shift in your seat.

“You’re nice to look at”.

He huffs out a sound that sounds like a chuckle, both amused and somehow coy.

“How come you ended up on that website? You don’t seem like the type who’d need to rent a man”.

You stay silent for a few seconds, looking straight ahead while lost in your own thoughts. Truth is, you’re not quite sure yourself. It’s true: you’re definitely not the type and, suddenly, the entirety of the absurd situation weighs heavy on your chest.

You’re in a car, with a man you know nothing about, heading to a wedding party where everyone will be able to call your bluff. And you spent an embarrassing amount of money for this, too.

“I think I’m about to throw up”, you murmur.

“Excuse me?”.

“I’m seriously about to throw up. Oh, no. What was I thinking?”, your hands rise to cover your face, “stop the car, please”.

“We’re on the highway”.

“But I’m about to throw-”

“Please stop talking about throwing up, the thought of someone vomiting triggers my gag reflex”, Oliver sends an alarmed glance your way but you’re refusing to meet his gaze, practically bending over in your own seat, “think of the leather seats”.

“I don’t care about your stupid leather seats!”.

“You were fine ten seconds ago-”

“Oliver”, the way you straight out whine his name all of a sudden tucks the words back into his throat, “I don’t even know you. Oh, god, what if you’re a maniac? What if you try to murder me? I’m in a car with a man I don’t know, I spent so much money only to end up dead in a ditch!”.

“Okay, listen-”

“I’m sorry, I know this is a really weird reaction but I’m freaking out big time, I never did this before-”

“Me neither!”.

Your eyes grow in size and your jaw slacks, panic overcoming your features. Oliver clears his throat.

“I mean, I never had to convince an entire audience at a wedding. My dates were always a walk in the park, an afternoon at the mall, one movie, an ice cream on the way home”, he lies so easily it almost makes him laugh. Either way, Oliver slows down and gently stops the car, parking it on the shoulder of the highway.

“Hey”, he tentatively reaches for your wrist, to gently remove one of your hands from your face, “can you look at me? You said I’m nice to look at, no?”.

“You are. Which would make you the perfect murderer”, you whisper. Still, you comply and find an incredulous smile brightening up his face.

“Jesus. Okay, listen, I promise you can trust me. I won’t hurt you. If you changed your mind I can drive you home right now, or drop you off at the venue and leave”. 

“Really?”.

“Really”.

You inhale a deep breath and relax against your seat underneath the weight of his honest, magnetic gaze.

“I’m sorry. You must think I’m insane”.

“Believe it or not, I’ve met more insane people”, he smiles.

You lower your gaze.

“It’s just… not something I would usually do. I was really tired of being always the lonely one at weddings and social gatherings, I never let the teasing get to me but I guess I started feeling”, you pause to look for the right word, “vulnerable. I don’t have to prove anything but I was just so sick of it. And this particular colleague is insufferable, she’s been with the guy ever since high school and just kept talking my ear off about true love, soulmates, all that bullshit…”, Oliver laughs and you look up from your lap.

“What?”.

“Nothing”, he raises both hands in mock protection, “keep going”.

You glare at him.

“Well, that’s the story. I was exhausted, drank an entire bottle of wine, found the website, booked the most expensive option because I really wanted to rub it in their faces. Then I almost had a panic attack about it, apparently”.

“The most expensive, huh?”, his blatant smugness makes you groan.

“You know you are the most expensive”.

He doesn’t, really. But it’s surely a pleasant learning.

“Right. Well, I’m ready to be your arm candy and piss the bride off if you’ll have me”, Oliver flashes you another smile, “you know, I’m sure she hired a good glam team but I’m willing to bet my date still looks better”.

“You’re such a flirt”, you smile and idly shake your head, “you know what? Fine. What the hell, I deserve a few hours with a hot dude who says I look pretty. Let’s go piss the bride off”.

He starts the engine again with a pleased hum.

“Please pay more attention, I remember saying you look beautiful”.

“Ugh, they really know what they’re doing on that website”, you laugh, sudden and loud and genuine.

Oliver never thought Sendo’s dumb prank was something he’d resent him for. On the contrary, he decided to go with it just one time, for the sake of having a funny story to share one day.

Now, with the vivacious laughter of the (not entirely sane) stranger currently in his car still ringing in his ears, he knows he made the right decision.

Oliver is not prepared for the way you surprise him.

He has witnessed enough unsettling transformations in his life, hell, he still sometimes becomes another person on the field, but the switch you turn on the second you both walk into the reception is… staggering.

No one would be able to tell you had a breakdown in his car just moments prior to walking into the venue. Watching the way you carry yourself, how you talk to everyone, the confidence embedded in every word and movement is mesmerizing. Makes him doubt of his own sanity because what if he imagined you almost throwing up on his expensive seats?

His thumb idly runs over your knuckles as you introduce him to yet another friend. The boyfriend renting agreement comes with some important rules: the date is to be strictly platonic and there’s a fixed hourly rate which gets higher the more requested a boyfriend is. You briefly discussed some boundaries, to make sure the other is comfortable at all times: Oliver can’t kiss you and you can’t kiss him, but everything else is pretty much allowed. You asked if it was okay for him to hold your hand and he made it pretty clear that it wasn’t a problem, or so the fingers so easily slipping in between yours seemed to suggest. 

You kiss each other’s cheek and rest your heads on each other’s shoulder and your hands are so gentle as they move strands of dark hair away from his eyes. His arm feels solid and comforting around your shoulders, hand warm against the small of your back as he guides you through the garden filled with tables and guests.

Surprising Oliver is not easy but something weird happens when you call him baby for the first time. He wonders how you can make it sound so natural, where you learned to be a liar good enough to have your eyes sparkle like that, on demand. He’s there to have a fun story to share but he’s also supposed to do the work, to do what’s expected of him. Instead, it feels like you’re pulling the strings and all he can do is try to stay afloat within your current.

He surprises you too. When a few guests gather around you two, wonder shimmering in their eyes, friends asking where you even got to meet a pro soccer player, you look at him as shocked and rightfully confused as a fake girlfriend would be.

“She asked if she could get a jersey signed for…”, Oliver searches your gaze in silent demand and you clear your throat, still flabbergasted.

“Kenji”, you offer an easy smile.

The man standing on Oliver’s left, supposedly Kenji himself, gasps.

“Right, Kenji”, Oliver smiles too, “I told her I would only sign it if she went on a date with me”.

“He has that romantic blackmail thing about him, I fell for it instantly”, you ever so slightly narrow your gaze and, in response, he tightens his hold around your waist.

“You’ve been dating him for months and you didn’t think of getting us tickets to some games?”, another one of your old colleagues, Yoshio, pouts.

“You’ve been dating him for months and you didn’t think of getting us the numbers of some pro soccer players?”, your friend Yumi practically shoves Yoshio out of the way and you finally relax, melting into genuine laughter.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Guess we can still make that happen, right, baby?”, there’s a mischievous glint in your eyes when you look at him. He thinks he might get used to being looked at with such daring playfulness.

“Sure. Shuto’s always happy to go on dates-”

“Sendo Shuto?”, Yumi’s eyes get as big as saucers. This time, Oliver laughs with you.

It shouldn’t come as a shock that he’s good at what he does but you still can’t quite believe just how talented he is as a fake boyfriend. You’re aching to ask questions, the entire dinner spent wondering what on earth a famous pro soccer player is even doing on a rent a boyfriend website. Nothing gets past social media these days, wouldn’t that be news eventually? How does he keep it a secret? Is it a second job, a weird fetish?

Akane’s never been particularly traditional from what you can recall but her husband really wanted to incorporate as much traditional customs as possible in their celebration. You sit through course after course of plates and bowls filled with delicious dishes: clear soup with shrimp cake, sashimi, grilled fish glazed with sweet miso, tempura, red rice. All the while Oliver, ankle hooked around yours underneath the table, makes perfect conversation with everyone. He has an answer ready to each question and you pretend to ignore both your colleagues’ and Akane’s bewildered, inquisitorial gazes directed at you from tables away, too busy reciprocating your date’s honeyed praises and smiles.

He gets you alone in between courses, right as everyone is either taking a break or bringing the dancefloor to life before fruit and cake are served. They won’t buy it if we don’t pull away from the crowd for a little bit.

It’s why Oliver currently has you pressed against a retaining wall in a more secluded but still strategically visible part of the garden, body towering over yours and so close you can feel the heat radiating through the fabric of his white shirt.

“A pro soccer player”, you click your tongue, “care to explain?”.

“Relax your shoulders”, he murmurs and smiles, pleased, when you comply right away, “I owe you a date, not explanation”.

You deflate a bit and Oliver curls further over you.

“Fine, keep your secrets”, a pause, “won’t this be a problem if someone takes some pics and leaks them, though?”.

“I stopped caring about that stuff long time ago. But I can have everyone here sign an nda to protect you from it, just say the word”.

You shake your head.

“It’s fine. I’m not really on social media and we’ll split up by tomorrow, anyway”.

“Aw, you’ll break my heart”, one of his hands rises to rest on the side of your neck, thumb softly tracing your jaw, “even after validating how friendly and incredibly charming I am. So cold”.

There’s something about him, a stranger you paid to pretend to be your boyfriend for the sake of not attending yet another wedding alone. It’s odd and has your heart thumping in your chest, something behind your ribs catching fire whenever his fingers graze your skin so intentionally. You wonder if this is really him, if he’s the person you feel so inexplicably drawn to. If there’s a chance of you not being stupid enough to be attracted to a faux boyfriend with a carefully crafted, fictitious personality.

“Make it look like you’re kissing me”, you ignore his teasing for the sake of your sanity and slightly tilt your head up to meet the dangerous glint of mismatched eyes. Oliver lowers his head and tilts it slightly to the side, lips moving against your cheek when he speaks again.

“Put your arms around my neck”, he orders back in a murmur. Your scoff makes him chuckle as he pretends to not notice how you shiver against him.

“This is such a weird side job to have”, your embrace pulls him closer, or maybe it’s the lightest brush of your lips against his chin. When your fingers start carding through the green hair at the base of his nape, he exhales.

“Maybe it’s not a side job. Maybe I’m just here for you, just this once”.

You idly brush your nose against his cheek, a feeling warm and treacherous unfurling in your chest. He pulls back enough to lock your gaze to his once more, still so intense despite being concealed by the partial darkness of this particular corner of the garden. He is so unfairly beautiful. Not far from where you stand, guests are laughing and drinking and dancing, some of them no doubt looking at you two. It’s striking, how little they suddenly matter.

“Maybe that makes me lucky, then”, you whisper, lean into his touch when his other hand cradles your cheek. Oliver gently holds your face in his hands, seemingly conflicted as his gaze falls on your lips. You tilt your head back to give him a better view.

An absurd thought takes shape in a far corner of your mind: will this truly be the one and only time you’ll get to see him? Not that you’d ever be pathetic enough to rent a man from a website multiple times. Let alone the same man. It’s such a weird, ridiculous thing to be disappointed by. You wonder if it’ll rival the disappointment of not being kissed by him.

Oliver wets his lips, the pink flash of his tongue alluring in a maddening way. Your head spins. You don’t recall ever feeling such unusual torment before.

And then, finally, finally, he leans closer.

“Hey, lovebirds!”, Akane’s cheerful tone makes you both jump and you bring a hand to your chest as Oliver takes a wobbly step back, “we didn’t have the chance to chat, are you having fun?”.

She’s not talking to you at all, attentive gaze set on the man next to you.

“Everything’s perfect, thank you for having us. I wish you both everlasting happiness”, you smile, a little tense.

“Well, I can’t say I wasn’t surprised. One almost wishes he was around for all those office christmas parties, right? Remember how you were always the only one to show up alone?”.

You clear your throat, shift your weight from one foot to the other.

“I remember. Always alone and yet still the funniest person in every room, without fail”, with a wink, you hope to conceal the soreness caused by her ungenerous words.

Akane hums.

“I still wonder why that’s such a great coping mechanism…”

“It proves she doesn’t need a man to have a personality”, Oliver straight out grins, one hand comes to rest on your nape and gives it a gentle squeeze, “it’s what I like about her”.

She raises her brows in interest.

“Well, that’s true. She’s pretty great”.

“Yeah, she is”.

You relax under his touch and a strange thrill comes with it, with knowing he possesses the ability to make you feel at ease. He doesn’t exactly dislike such knowledge.

“I’m glad you have each other now”, Akane’s features soften, “maybe one day I’ll be invited to your wedding!”.

You cough, embarrassed.

“Let’s not go overbo-”

“Maybe!”, Oliver chimes in once again, jovial, “who can tell?”.

It almost makes you choke on air. When you look up at him, Akane’s cheerful laughter echoing in the sweet summer evening air, he’s already looking at you.

As you stumble back to join the other guests, heels sinking in the soft grass, the bride gently grazes your arm with the pads of her fingers before rejoining her husband and their closest friends. You know Akane is not a bad person, her words don’t hold any actual venom despite stinging. In her own way she means well, which is why you are so genuinely happy for her. She got the happy ending she was always destined to have. It’s just that not everyone is as lucky and it’s unfair to expect them to be just because she’s part of the chosen ones.

“Where are you going?”, Oliver hooks a finger in the low square back of your dress to pull you in, the contact setting something similar to a flow of electricity running along your spine.

“To eat cake?”, you easily dissimulate. He keeps his finger there, even when you stop in your tracks.

“Let them”, he winks, “may I have this dance?”.

You stay frozen.

“Did you just casually quote Marie Antoinette to me?”, is all you can come up with because, frankly, the idea of a man who already possesses so many blessings being also able to dance is a little too unfair.  

“Can’t a man be hot and educated?”, he grins, then finally releases the back of your dress by letting the stretch fabric lightly slap against your back, “don’t think you can distract me, let’s go”.

If there’s one learning to be taken from this impossibly strange evening is that, apparently, there is no escaping Oliver Aiku. He even rivals the promise of a rich serving of white chocolate almond cake with raspberry filling.

He pulls you close on the interlocking parquet dance floor rented by the newlyweds, hands splayed big and warm on your hips as your arms, for the second time, find their way to rest around his neck. You do your best to not feel intimidated by the excessively romantic, slow track everyone else is currently dancing to as well.

Then, it’s as if a spell is cast on you. Or rather a curse.

“Who is he?”, the question surprises you and your eyes find his. Oliver is so close and he smells so unethically good.

“Who?”, yet you struggle to keep your focus, attention oscillating between the stranger you’re currently pressed against and a more familiar face your wandering eyes keep searching, dancing not far from you. Something painfully throbs in your chest.

“The man you keep looking at, who is he?”, Oliver asks softly, almost caringly.

“My ex-boyfriend”, the confession isn’t but a low whisper, “I think. I think he’s here with the woman he cheated on me with. Well, one of them, anyway”, your chuckle is bitter. It distorts the joyfulness of the evening, the mere sight of them suddenly staining, polluting every positive feeling you’ve been able to feel until now.

And then Oliver is grasping your chin, tilting his head to effectively block your view of them. You’re forced to look at him and only him, to focus on how his thumb skating over the skin underneath your bottom lip feels.

“How about you keep your eyes on me, then?”, he whispers.

“Sorry”, you stop yourself with a sigh when your gaze slides once more, “I’m sorry. It’s really stupid”.

“What is?”, his gaze, perhaps involuntarily, falls on your lips, “caring? Feeling hurt?”.

“Don’t do that”.

“What?”.

“Don’t… like, I know this is an act. But you don’t have to do that too, pretend to care. You’re a little too good at it and it confuses me”.

Oliver lets go of your chin and offers a faint smile.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, you confuse me too”.

You blink a few times, taken aback. He gracefully takes one of your hands from behind his neck and lifts your arm above your head to twirl you. For a moment, his eyes appreciate the airy swirl of the hem of your dress.

“I’m only pretending to be your boyfriend”, everything else feels a little too real, he wants to add. Maybe you’ll read the unsaid in eyes he can’t seem to be able to keep on anything else but you.

“You have a gift”, with a smile, you choose to deflect, “ever thought of giving up the soccer career?”.

“For this, you mean?”, Oliver goes from having his hands on your hips to hooking his arms around your waist, effectively caging you against him. Your forehead grazes his and the wind is swiftly knocked out of your lungs at the sudden proximity.

“Something like that, yeah”, one of your hands toys with his green strands once more, nails lightly scratching the back of his neck. A sound of contentment vibrates low in his throat and it makes you want to pull him close, impossibly closer.

He tilts his head to the side and you feel dizzy because his lips are ever so slightly brushing against yours. Not quite touching them, never kissing them, just there as a faint reminder or rather an intoxicating promise.

“You have to go in about five minutes”, you whisper, perhaps for the sake of feeling more of his mouth so close yet still too far from your own.

“Mm?”, he only manages to let out a confused sound.

You let your nose brush against his own. Playfully, daringly.

“I could only afford a couple hours, not the entire night”.

Oliver welcomes the implications of your admission with a low chuckle.

“And if I stay?”.

“I may be too broke for that”.

He presses a kiss to the very corner of your mouth. Sweet, fleeting. Determined.

“My treat”.

He can keep it platonic for about five more minutes.

Hello 👋,

I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞

The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔

Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊

Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉

https://gofund.me/58268669 🔗

reposting

free palestine 🇵🇸

https://gofund.me/58268669

---

Hi 👋, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔

I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $40,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future.

Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶

If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏

Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤️‍🩹

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗

hi im not a big platform but if anyone sees this please take a moment to spread the word and donate if you can!!

---

─── 𝐖𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐄

+ sae x f!reader | wc 4.9k | content: angst, fluff, some making out, implied sex, stupid teenager phase

notes: sobs this was not supposed to be this long … one of y’all need to stop me from writing about this man !! i love him too much, pls send help </3 extra: this is the song playing in the last scene :’)

summary: sae has few interests, and one of them is you. but sometimes, being special just isn’t enough.

you’ve always been special.

ever since age three when your family moved across the street from where the itoshis lived. ever since age five when you finally gathered the courage to talk to the pair of brothers. ever since age six when sae invited you to play with him and rin. ever since age seven when you cried because someone bullied you at the playground and sae wiped away your tears. ever since age ten when both of you played with paper rings. ever since age eleven when you and sae would talk endlessly at night through the phone and get nagged at by your parents when they found out.

ever since age twelve when you told sae you’d watch him become the best soccer player in the world by his side.

your presence bleeds into sae’s life and he can’t think about anything without relating it to you; like how his breakfast tastes like ass when you’re not smearing your stupid peanut butter on it because apparently peanut better goes well with everything is your phase at that point of time. like how he’s walking home and he’ll always have to crane his head to the right just to check if you’re on your front porch swing, because if you are, he’ll wave and then you’ll smile and wave back, and sae would feel like it’s a special code you two share.

you’re probably the only thing he pays his spare attention to. and rin. you, rin, soccer. that’s all.

you complain way too much, especially at the fact that sae doesn’t smile often. he counters, “that’s none of your business.”

and you tell him one day you’ll be the reason he smiles everyday.

sae thinks it’s kind of stupid though, because you already are. you just aren’t around to see it. he’ll probably never let you see it too. he wouldn’t hear the end of it if he did.

it isn’t long before you’re age fifteen and graduating middle school and you’re excited to start high school. it didn’t really make a difference for sae, as long as he got to play soccer, he really couldn’t care less.

when you’re age sixteen you tell sae that a boy from class broke your heart because he didn’t accept your valentines’ chocolates. it was as good as a rejection, apparently. or whatever girl code says it is.

frankly, sae’s just offended. you’ve never given him any valentines’ shit. all of a sudden some no name guy is getting it?

maybe it’s true what people say, teenage girls cry over stupid things they consider love that’s not actually love. now you’re getting his soccer jersey wet with your tears and you’re crooning on and on about how boys suck but somehow sae’s still the best.

you’re sixteen and crying on sae’s shoulder, while he’s seventeen and wishing he could torture the son of a bitch who made you cry.

this is the closest you’ve ever been, physically. your heart’s not really broken because whoever you’re crying about has never really had it. but sae doesn’t know that.

teenage girls make really stupid decisions sometimes. and other times, they making stupid passing comments, like when you say “glad i didn’t let him kiss me. would suck for my first kiss to be with a dick who didn’t give a shit about me.”

sometimes teenage boys make stupid decisions too.

sae doesn’t really know what possesses him to do this, but he doesn’t stop it. he doesn’t stop his hand from reaching out to you, doesn’t stop his fingers from tilting your chin up. there’s only confusion in your eyes when he looks into them. there’s only hesitation in his.

sae’s not anything to you except for a childhood friend, and you’re not anything to him, except for one of the most beautiful people he’s ever met. that’s why he does this slowly, so you have time to stop this.

he has no right to do this. he wishes you would just stop him.

you’re both teenagers when sae becomes your first kiss, when your tears stain his cheeks and he tastes like the fruits he just ate. you’re both delirious off of the feeling, like neither of you want this to end because your lips stay connected even when you’re not moving, and your lashes are fluttering against one another’s and sae really wants to kiss you again.

but it’s late and your parents are probably the ones knocking on his door right now so he stops himself and pulls away while rin bounds down the stairs to open the door.

sae sees nothing but you, you and your pretty face and your pretty lips and your perfect perfect person.

“there, now your first kiss is with a dick who does care about you.”

it’s that same summer and you’ve forgotten all about the stupid boy that supposedly broke your heart. you have sae with you whenever he’s free, when he decides to bring you out after practice and explore rooftops to find the best view for the fireworks.

you’re not together, but it sure feels like you are.

then it’s autumn and the leaves are turning orange and red, and you swear you see sae’s cheeks and ears turn nearly the same shade when he holds your hand for the first time as you walk through the park, a white cat crossing in front of you.

sae blames it on his practice earlier and that he’s tired because there’s no way he’ll ever admit it’s because of you.

when winter comes, sae’s still taking care of you. nothing stops him from playing soccer, but nothing can stop him from finding you either. sae’s starting to regret his decisions when you force him to go ice skating and look at him expectantly whenever you see a mistletoe.

you’re a lot of work, maybe you’re worth it.

and then you kiss him again and he thinks yes, maybe he can do this. he can juggle soccer and you, it’ll magically work out.

finally it’s spring and you’re excited because you love the cherry blossoms, and sae thinks maybe he loves something else but he’s not going to go there yet. and while everyone’s watching the solar eclipse that one night, sae’s watching you.

for once, he wants to believe in superstitions, wants to believe what watching the solar eclipse means.

“what’s the matter?”

you’re always so perceptive. you’d make a great playmaker, he feels.

of course you pick up on the tension, barely a minute after you walk into his room. sae doesn’t want to ruin this, whatever this is, whether it’s love or something less, or maybe something more.

but it’s not a democracy, and the answer is crystal clear in sae’s mind. his answer’s always been the same, but it’s not like you don’t exist in his world.

“the club in spain gave me an offer.”

that’s all he needs to say to make you understand. and if you weren’t the most understanding person he knows, you might’ve reacted differently, but you’re still the same supportive, kind girl he met at age four.

“when do you go?” your voice is shaky and he knows you’re trying to hold it together.

sae’s sorry, really.

“next month.”

it’s not a lot of time, but probably enough to say goodbye. then you throw your arms around him and you work your magic, you say you want to try despite the distance, despite the unknown timeline. and who is sae if not someone who’d give it a try?

he’s not even sure he can ever say no to you.

it doesn’t seem real until the night before he leaves, because you’re eighteen and standing in his near barren room, everything already packed into boxes and loaded.

maybe it’s the fact he’ll be gone for a very long time, doesn’t know when he’ll see you again. maybe it’s the adrenaline rushing through his veins when he feels you pressed up against him. maybe it’s the fact he’s denying the depth of his feelings for you and it’s getting him frustrated.

or maybe it’s because he’s selfish and he doesn’t want anyone else to have you, just like how he gave you your first kiss.

he’s your first kiss, and he’ll be your first time, with your hands clawing at his clothes. and you’ll be his, with the way he’s grabbing onto your bare back so desperately.

you’re eighteen and you think nothing’s prettier than the sounds sae makes, especially when his lips are right next to your ear, with his hot breath fanning against you.

sae’s nineteen and he thinks you’re the best thing he’s ever tasted, in all sense of the word. he thinks you look pretty in pink, still pretty when you wear nothing too.

and suddenly sae thinks that maybe it doesn’t feel so crazy to think that the both of you might make it through this.

long distance can work for some people. but sometimes it’s just meant to drive two people further away.

sae’s gaining momentum in europe, and you’re proud of him. you’re proud of your boyfriend, doing his best and showing off his talents and having his hard work pay off.

you’re really, genuinely happy for him. but the bigger of a star he is, the further away he feels, and maybe it’s selfish of you to want him here, to want him to be just your neighbour itoshi sae like how things started out.

maybe it’s selfish and wishful thinking, but you can’t help yourself.

sometimes sae doesn’t even have time to look at his phone. he’s tired and overwhelmed and understandably too. and you feel guilty everytime you subject him to your insecurities.

but you’re nineteen and you don’t know better.

rin’s not much fun to hang around with, especially when he got more stoic and awkward. he’s like a mirror of his brother, and that may fool a lot of people, except you knew him before that. but you’re not going to butt your head in things that don’t concern you, so you leave him be.

and suddenly the itoshis seem further away than they’ve ever been. for the first time in your life, you’re not sure if trying will be enough anymore.

sae misses you. that’s whenever he has the free time to think, when he’s not hounded by trainings after trainings, when he’s not busy from day to night with whatever new training regime they’ve got him on.

is he aware that he’s probably being the world’s worst boyfriend now? yes. but sae can’t force himself to choose that over his dreams. can’t force himself not to choose soccer.

[17:08] she’s fine, idk what you’re worried about.

rin’s message doesn’t alleviate his worries. sae knows you better than anyone, and he doesn’t believe you’re fine.

[08:08] hey sae :)

[17:34] going to bed now, gn!! &lt;3

sae stares at your message for a while in the locker room, while everyone else is showering. you’ve cooled off on the pet names, you’re worried you’re overstepping. you’re worried he’s lost his feelings.

he’s not.

he’d be crazy to.

but he can’t find the energy to convince himself that this would turn out fine. he can’t convince himself that he’s not hurting you every single day by not being able to be everything you need, by not being able to be physically there for you.

this half-assed relationship isn’t what you deserve. and where he is right now, with his bird’s eye view of the world, he doesn’t know if he can ever give you anything else.

[17:49] goodnight. call you tomorrow.

the moment sae breaks up with you, you feel like that kid at sixteen all over again, except this time you don’t have your favourite person’s shoulder to cry on and this time it’s actually love.

all you can think of when you hear him pick up the phone is that morning right before he left for the airport, how his hair’s a mess and how his lashes are way too pretty and how he sounded when he’s all groggy and tired.

but then he tells you the one thing you do not want to hear, and the illusion is shattered into pieces.

“this isn’t working out.”

“what are you talking about?” he’s silent, and you’re anxious. “we’re fine, sae.”

you can hear him sighing over the phone. you so desperately want to fix this, and so does sae but he can’t think of anything more selfish than to ask you to wait for him until he’s ready—he knows what’s the right thing to do. it sucks, but he’s made up his mind.

“that’s bullshit, y/n,” he responds, calmly, and you feel him slipping further and further from you.

“i- look, i-i know it’s hard but we can—”

“give it a break, woman,” sae chuckles, low and deep, and you’re beginning to doubt that you know him at all right now. “we’re done.”

the dial tone is all you can hear after that.

twenty years old is where you have your first actual heartbreak.

and all that talk about how time heals all feels like bullshit when you’re right in the middle of it all. five days in and you’re still a wreck. twenty days later and you’re still staring at the pictures you and sae took together. a month passes and you’re visiting the places you went to together. just a sad, pathetic girl crying on the benches, reliving what she once had.

three months later you’re still watching his matches on tv. you’re still cheering for him inside. four months later and it’s sae’s birthday and he doesn’t even respond to your birthday message. half a year after the breakup and you finally stop crying when you think of him.

but it’s easy to delude yourself when you’re not in the presence of what you grieve. because eight months after you broke up, you see reports that sae’s dating a sports photographer. the next few days, a picture is released of them kissing in a restaurant.

then you get glimpses of other girls being able to be intimate with him. other girls getting to taste his lips and feel his love. other girls getting his attention when that right used to solely belong to you.

and you’ve never felt worse.

“why so glum?”

sae blinks at the woman, indifferent. he can’t even remember her name.

“nadia,” she says, like she’s reading his goddamn mind, holding her hand out. “i’ve been your team’s photographer for a few months now.”

sae shakes her hand out of courtesy because he really doesn’t want his publicist to chew him out again. “didn’t ask.”

“you know, you’re a lot more crabby these days,” she comments, and it’s like he can see the lightbulb going off in her head. “oh, is it girlfriend issues?”

“i don’t have one, so shut it.”

“come on, i promise i’m good at making people forget.” she says this so seductively that sae’s a little disturbed. he just wants to get this shoot done with and go home, maybe even check up on you a little. all in incognito mode, of course, because he can’t risk you knowing he still cares. can’t risk getting your hopes up.

somehow the stars have spent all their time aligning sae’s soccer career and everything else is in tatters because his publicist forces him to take nadia up on her offer and go out with her.

what was supposed to be a one time thing turned out to be something more. she wasn’t even close to you, but she could be close. turns out when he’s not being such a dick, nadia can be moderately interesting.

different, maybe that’s what he needs.

he thinks back to when she kissed him on their first date. sae still finds himself hoping you didn’t see that.

but no, he’s not in love with you anymore. sae’s officially an adult at twenty-one and he’s still the same stubborn guy in denial because he’s looking at pictures of you while nadia’s sitting right next to him.

it’s not healthy, it really isn’t.

you’re twenty-one now and you’re actually going on a date with the sole intention of trying to get over the one and only itoshi sae.

can you even trust your friend? all you know is that the guy is a friend of a best friend’s and that’s all she told you.

“my best friend’s a good guy, so by extension, so is his best friend,” was all she said.

now you’re here, at the amusement park, waiting for your date to show himself because apparently, in your friend’s bid for suspense, she was reluctant to share anything about him except that he’s dreamy and pretty and that his friend describes him as a genius.

and also “oh, he’s a soccer player too so that’s right up your alley, right?”

when the call from date guy comes in (because to stop you from profiling your date she also didn’t give you his name), you kind of like his voice.

“hey, where are you?”

you find out his name is nagi. and that he’s only here because reo stole his switch and he won’t give it back until the date’s over. which kind of works because you tell him you’re only here because you wanted to get over someone.

to which he says it’s a hassle.

there’s nothing you expect out of this, but then you find yourself enjoying your date.

it’s clear by the first fifteen minutes why nagi chose this place to meet. he’s absurdly good at games. he’s won you tons of plushies that you had to give away to some very happy kids. it’s a pattern; every game that he doesn’t know, he only loses once and then he proceeds to dominate.

no wonder his friend calls him a genius.

with nagi it’s easy, fluid. you’ve been spending the whole night there with him, playing together and eating together—well, mostly it’s just you feeding nagi because it turns out he finds a lot of things a hassle.

three days later, you find out that apparently you’re not a hassle in his books. not really, because he asks you out again.

it’s irrational.

sae shouldn’t be this bothered, but he is. he hates seeing your stupid updates about how you’re on a date with this nagi guy. he hates seeing your posts with the two of you wearing matching sweaters for christmas.

he gives it a like.

nadia’s already gone. sae doesn’t have time or energy to waste on people that don’t matter. and you shouldn’t matter. not right now. but here he is, wishing the circumstances were different.

if you and nadia switched places. if you had something to bring you to spain. it’s fucking selfish, he knows. doesn’t stop him from wishing for it. he can’t think of anyone else like how he thinks of you. doesn’t want to.

he really is clueless about everything outside of soccer, because he’s twenty-two when he realises that no one could ever make him forget about you, and maybe he should just live with it.

sae turns twenty-three when he’s in the running for being the world’s best midfielder. he’s gotten rid of the hopes of moving on and he’ll just fake it till he makes it.

maybe that’s why this year is particularly special to him. or maybe it’s because for the first time in a long while, you wish him happy birthday.

at midnight, in japan. because you’re thoughtful that way.

this time he responds.

thanks. how r u?

it’s criminal how easy it is for you to get his heart beating like this. he sees you typing and it’s enough to lift his mood.

great, school’s kicking my ass though.

sae finds himself wishing that he could hear your voice right now. for some stupidly non-complex reason that he finds completely absurd.

i saw your match last week, good game, genius.

fuck. after all this time, he still wants you.

his fingers type i miss you, just for the hell of it. just to see it there on his screen before he inevitably deletes it and replaces it with something mediocre like thanks or i know.

because he can’t just say that after being the one who broke things off. he can’t do that when he still thinks it won’t work out.

all he does is sigh and hit the delete button—except fuck, he accidentally hit send. and he would’ve deleted it if you weren’t already online and read it and he sees you typing for a moment before you stop completely and go offline.

sae has never felt more numb.

it’s been three months since sae said he missed you. you still can’t get that out of your head. the most upfront he’s been about his feelings and he chooses then of all times to be honest?

when your boyfriend was right beside you?

maybe it was your fault. you didn’t even know why you wished him a happy birthday. maybe you missed him too and was just lying to yourself.

god, maybe you’re the asshole in this after all. did you really love nagi? or was he just exceptionally well at making you forget? you really really like him, that’s all you know.

“hey, what’s wrong?” nagi’s looking at you, pushing his hair back, and you can’t help but think you’re lucky to have him these past few months.

but the turmoil inside you wins, and maybe you understand a little bit of how sae felt that night when he broke up with you.

it’s not fair to nagi for you to do this, but it’s not fair to him either to keep him around.

“we need to talk.”

it’s a surreal feeling, to be back in japan.

sae was nineteen when he left. now he’s twenty-seven when he breathes the tokyo air again. he lugs around his carry-on baggage because he’s not staying here for long. not yet. he’s coming back soon, and he doesn’t really know why. he’s milked everything he could from spain, from the rest of europe, some of the americas, and maybe he’s homesick now.

plain and simple.

the cab driver asks him why he looks so sharp, and he simply says, “wedding.”

it’s been seven years since he broke up with you. and your grip on him is as firm as ever. a grip he’ll never let you know you have on him because he’s made this mistake before—said i miss you and then scared you away.

by the next day he couldn’t even find you online because everything is wiped and maybe you hate him, hate his guts. that’s fine. he can live with that.

to him, you’re still the same lovable person as you were at age five. still the same girl at age sixteen that he fell in love with. you’re still his person and it’s fine if he has to just admire you from afar.

when he arrives, he takes a long hard look around the room, filled with guests socialising and drinking their wines and it’s so pathetic but he’s wondering if you’re still around. he’s late, and it’s his plane’s fault but it’s no use playing the blame game.

“hey,” rin calls out when he sees his brother. “you missed the ceremony.”

“yeah, stupid plane got delayed,” sae says, mind still distracted.

rin formally introduces his new wife to sae and she seems nice, polite, the kind that can put his brother in his place if she needs to. that’s nice. sae can’t help envisioning you in the wedding dress though. you’d look nice.

nicer if he was the one beside you.

“oh! as a gift to my now brother-in-law, i have a friend i want to set you up with,” she grins, and as much of an ass that sae is, he just figures he’ll reject the poor girl later. for now, he’ll entertain his new sister-in-law.

rin claps him on the shoulder before smirking and walking off, presumably to get a drink because no matter how much rin has changed, sae doubts he’ll ever become friendly enough to mingle in this crowd.

sae feels someone poking his shoulder and turns around, first to find his sister-in-law grinning from ear to ear, and next to find you next to her, just like he remembers.

pretty in pink, stupid bashful smile, still fucking beautiful.

“have fun,” rin’s wife says before she walks off with a knowing look. she’s already winning points with sae for bringing you to him.

“hey, genius,” you try to suppress your smile but it’s not working.

he thinks he’s dreaming. he’s not. he’s here. and so are you. and this might just be what he missed all this time.

you hold your hand out and he takes it wordlessly, obediently. sae follows you to the dance floor, trying to calm his erratic heartbeats, savouring the feeling of your hand in his once again, remembering that moment back in autumn when he first felt it.

when you wrap your hands around his neck and he wraps his around your waist, it feels like finally, something is real. like there’s something in this country that can really keep him here this time. because now he’s twenty-seven and he finally understands, he’s always loved you but he’s never been ready until now.

“can’t believe you let your brother get married before you,” you say, sarcasm because you’re breaking into a grin. “he actually beat you at something.”

sae pouts slightly, averting his gaze. “what’s the big deal anyway?”

you shrug. “i’d have thought you’d be the first. maybe with one of the girls you met abroad or something.”

there’s a certain bitterness in your tone that he likes, only because it means you minded all this time. the thought of him with someone else. he suddenly remembers something, and searches the room for a familiar face.

gray eyes meet his teal ones before they turn away, disinterested.

“you sure your boyfriend won’t mind you dancing with your ex?”

“probably not, since i don’t have one.” you smirk, sensing the bitterness in his tone too. it’s funny, seeing sae jealous like this.

he has no reason to though, since you broke up with nagi after being honest with yourself—that you’re not over sae and you probably never will be. you’d decided to just live with your decision.

“shame. thought you guys looked cute in those matching sweaters.”

so that was a jealous like, you think to yourself.

“thought you looked cute with that sports photographer girl too, kissing and all,” you say, though it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. “why didn’t that work out?”

for the first time in his life, sae decides to be outright honest with you—

“because she’s not you.” because everytime she said his name, he’d overlay it with your voice in his head. because everytime she’d tried to get close, he’d resent her more for not being you. because no matter how hard anyone tries, they will never be you and that will never work, not for sae.

—to a certain degree.

he’s twenty-seven when he’s finally old enough to understand that it was never a problem with feelings because he’s always loved you all the same all this time. it was just a matter of being ready at the right time. it’s like luck in the world of soccer, where coincidences can only fall to those who are prepared.

and he’s here now. he’s ready.

call him crazy for thinking you’re on the same page because you’re getting closer and closer and closer.

“itoshi sae,” you whisper his name against his lips and he’s reminded of the first time he had you. you drive him crazy and he thinks he’ll keep on letting you. “i missed you too.”

you did. you used to be too young and inexperienced to put yourself in sae’s shoes. too young and naive thinking emotions were enough for two people to stay. sometimes, some things just aren’t meant to be… in the moment. and other times, when you’re both ready, everything suddenly falls into place.

you were sixteen when sae first kissed you. now ten years later, ten years wiser, you kiss again, and this feels significantly better than before. because now you both know.

sae has known you ever since you were three. and he thinks he’ll keep on knowing you, every day, every hour, every minute. he wants to know you forever. and he’s thinking maybe that superstition worked out after all. maybe it was destined to be like this all along.

two people coming together and falling apart only to end up in each other’s arms.

and he thinks fuck superstition, fuck the white cats and solar eclipses and everything else. even if things threaten not to work, this time he’ll make it work.

sae’s known you for so long he overlooked one simple thing. when he kisses you even deeper and is greeted with your lips smiling against his, he knows.

he hasn’t become the world’s best soccer player yet, but when he does, you’ll be by his side.

one day those paper rings the both of you played with when you were little would be real.

you’ve always been special, and you always will be.

now he’s finally home.

PAIRING ▸ Nishimura Riki x fem!reader

SUMMARY ▸"Am I dating Y/N L/N? No thanks, I'd rather choke." Or in which you're clearly using some sort of spell to entice Riki, because why on earth would he suddenly start feeling this way about you?

GENRE ▸one-sided enemies to lovers, highschool au, she fell first but he fell harder, angst (lots of it), slow-ish burn.

WARNINGS ▸ swearing, featuring Eunchae from LeSserafim as your best friend and some additional cameos by other idols, some of dickish behaviour from Riki at the start :(, kissing, mentions of curses, occults knowledge, spells and witchcraft.

WC ▸ 7.1K

A/N ▸ Thank you for the immense support for this on the teaser!! I hope this lives up to your expectations, and I hope you guys enjoy the rest of my work as well :)

PLAYLIST ▸ Voodoo Doll by 5 Seconds of Summer, Kiss Me Kiss Me by 5 Seconds of Summer, Brought the Heat Back by Enhypen, Stockholm Syndrome by One Direction

The air is a sweet smelling summer type, the day you first meet Nishimura Riki. He's a scrawny little thing of twig arms and downcast, shy eyes. Having moved to Korea from Japan only barely a month back, the number of words he can say in this newfound land in the foreign language can be counted on one hand. And this poses a problem to him right now, considering how his older sister had already gone off on her own despite their mother's strict orders to stay together at all times. You spot the boy, a sprightly little thing yourself, and the first thing you notice is his eyes. The most gorgeous, mesmerizing eyes. They looked like the black beetles you saw in the spring - lazing on the dark brown tree trunks, absolutely fascinating and captivating.

Nishimura Riki is six years old and scared. He's at a playground with kids his age, but he feels like an alien in his own skin. They're all either playing in groups or duos - but no dice for singles. It's times like this that makes him want to clutch on to the fabric of his mother's dress and be whisked away to safety. A place where he doesn't feel so out of place. His soft, trembling body stills in a bit of surprise as a gentle tap knocks on his shoulder, ever so slightly. Turning around fearful of being picked on, he only comes face to face with a girl. You're looking straight at him with owlish, unblinking eyes that make Riki shiver in your gaze - feeling smaller and smaller than before. He doesn't like how you're looking at him, not in the slightest. "Hi there! I'm Y/N L/N. Are you new here?" You're quite articulate for a kid, he thinks, as if he's not one himself. He's barely managed to string together the meaning of what you said through his broken understanding of the language, but it's the general environment about you that makes him hesitate. His lack of a response doesn't deter you apparently, as suddenly you're latching on to his wrist, trying to pull him to the sand pit, babbling on and on about being his new friend and offering to show him around town. He doesn't know how to get out of your vice-like grip, but he doesn't mind your company either. But it's just all too much. There's too many things going on around him, and you're too loud.

Suddenly, he's wrenching his hand out of yours, a scowl on his youthful features. It's a frown directed right at you like a bullet, but it leaves you unscathed. You still look at him with a complete look of innocence, completely boring into his own eyes. There's something about the way you look at him, and he hates it. He notices the way you hold no precise expression on your face, only a peaceful and serene look coupled with the way one would gaze when they felt curious and fascinated. He decides at that moment, with all the iron resolve of a six year old boy, that he hated this girl. He hated you and he wanted absolutely nothing to do with you. But this was in no way similar to the way you were feeling currently. With the way that inky void in his eyes were pulling you in like a siren song, you decided that you loved Nishimura Riki. 

11 years later

"Riki! Riki!". Your chants are loud even amongst the bustling crowd of attendees, all mingling about on the bleachers, eyes trained on the orange basketball as the squeaking sound of shoes against the polished wooden floor accentuated the tension of this cut-throat game. Jersey number 9, tallest on the team and jet black hair that had everyone reeling in his subtle aura, Riki's eyes are piercing as his focus solely stays on two things - the first being how to get past the rival team's defense, and the second being how annoying your cheering was to him.

Their opposing team is not letting them cut through this bottle neck tie easily, and the red timer with its robotic, digital numbers clocking down to the game's end was not really helping either. It was right now, or never. And Riki never let a game get to the tie-breaker, ever. He's quick and sharp witted, and he's got the athletic skill to get past the crowding defense team, and with a crisp swish of the white net hanging on the post, the ball is swiftly sent through the basket. The whistle is loud, but the rest of his teammates are louder, wasting no time in running on the court to aggressively another their prodigal player in affection and sweat, with Riki glaring away at them in faux irritation, but clearly preening in their pride. This was an important game after all, because it would be the game that would help team captain, Lee Heesung, who was graduating this spring, to choose the next in line to his legacy. And anyone with two eyes, who wasn't even on the team could easily say it belonged to Riki.

Your voice is back, louder again this time, and it has Riki grimacing amongst the celebrations, and Sunoo and Taki, his friends who had descended from the stands themselves, gave each other a knowing look of what was about to occur.

You're singing praises and it has him glowing, regardless of the frown marrying his sharp features. "God, that was so cool! You're so, so tall, it must have been an advantage for sure, but wow I mean that basket? Crazy!"

He's still glaring at you and his teammates have wry smiles on their faces. Your praises quieten down when you, and Riki, notice Lee Heesung walking over to Riki with a championing grin that only means one thing. Ushering Riki away, you just gazed at him at raw adoration as the boy's face lit up with the news Heesung was breaking him.

"By the way dude, are you dating that girl there? Y/N L/N?"

The question has him coughing slightly from the water he was chugging down. Sunoo and Taki are cackling violently at his expression, like Heesung had performed the most blasphemous act in front of him. "Heesung, what the hell dude. I'm not dating her, at all. I'll only date Y/N when pigs start flying."

He looks back to where you stood before, now gone from that spot. You always waited a bit before you left, usually, trying to catch him and make conversation with him, so this was new. A different kind of feeling he wasn't sure he was used to. It was strange, how he felt a bit different from the absence of you.

"Look, oh my god!" Taki cries out, pointing vaguely at the air. "What?" "I just saw a pig fly." “Shut the fuck up man.”

You were a curse sent from hell to torment him, that much was sure. He wasn’t sure what penance he was due to pay in this life for his previous actions that caused you to appear in his life, considering how since that moment on the playground, you’ve done nothing to actually make his life any better. And while he was explaining this very situation to Heesung, who was now sporting an amused grin at the way the normally nonchalant Riki’s mouth seemed to fly a mile a minute, Sunoo interrupted with a gasp at a particularly harsh tease. “She isn’t even doing anything bad you prick! I’d kill to have someone crush on me that long!” “Oh you can have her then, Sun. I do not want to see her in my life ever again once we’re out of here.” He huffs.

The various examples of the ways you’d managed to make things bad for him seemed to resurface to his mind almost immediately, souring his mood. Like when in middle school, when he bagged the hottest girl of their grade, Choi Ri-ah, to go out with him. It was magical to Riki, that eighth grade relationship - mainly because him being in it meant having you off his back. Your displeasure with his newfound relationship status was not a secret either, no your distaste was very clear, with the way you’d frown when they would walk in the hallways together holding hands, which in eighth grade, was a very big deal. It didn’t help that Ri-ah was also your quote unquote, sworn enemy. The two of you had hated each other's guts since almost preschool, and the sickening punch in the gut was how she’d managed to be with the only guy you’d ever loved. But Riki didn’t know any of that. And frankly, he didn’t care much about his and Ri-ah’s conversations or dates, where he would nod along as she talked his ears off about getting new earrings or the summer holiday her father was planning, where she was going to get the most outrageous tan. Sure, he liked her. But he liked not hearing your voice constantly bugging him more. 

“Dude she didn’t end your relationship with Ri-ah! Ri-ah was already going after another guy from that prep school, she just needed an excuse to end the relationship and made Y/N the scapegoat.” Taki told him exasperatedly, which just fell on deaf ears, because Riki was still convinced that you were the reason for the demise of his juvenile dating plan. Ri-ah had broken up with him seemingly out of the blue, over text, claiming that she felt uncomfortable dating a boy who was so coveted by another girl. And when fourteen year old Riki read that heartbreaking message curled up in his duvet at 10PM on a Tuesday, he just felt a bitter pill of hatred for you. Nothing had changed in the six years since that fateful meeting at the playground, no. You still made Riki shudder.

“I hate Y/N L/N. I wish she just left my life, because she’s what makes it worse.”

“He’s absolutely phenomenal.” You breathe out in a sigh, full of awe as you watch Riki skirt across the court with lightning speed. The dreamy looks and the lovestruck sounds was like routine to Eunchae, who had honestly even given up on rolling her eyes at you, because with the way she’d spent the last 10 years doing the same, she was afraid her eyes would get stuck at the back of the skull due to routine. It was truly a wonder how you hadn’t given up immediately after the first few tries - when he was extremely stubborn in denouncing the “Y/N’s boyfriend” title he’d earned. But you had your justification ready to go - that he never outright rejected you. Sure, he politely declined some invitations, but never a word against your feelings as such. It still raised the question, as to how you could chase a guy around this long. Because to you, the reason was quite fundamental - his eyes were still beautiful, and most importantly, they held no hate. Not an ounce of it, no matter how hard he tried to emulate it, which gave you hope. 

Unfortunately hope was a wonderful thing for sure, but also dangerous. It was quite the cycle you’d found yourself stuck in, and you weren’t honestly sure how long you could afford to linger as nothing but a mandatory footnote to him. It was eating away at you. But hope, hope made you hold on. Only Eunchae knew about the firm decision you’d taken last night. After all, she was your closest friend. And she even held you, as you solemnly promised to yourself, on the eve of the 11th anniversary of the day you first met Riki, to leave him behind forever, if there wasn’t any improvement in his behavior, or general perception of you. It was shocking, and honestly a huge decision. But firm in its promise, that last hook of hope would be gone soon by tomorrow.  “You know he ignored you again, right?” Eunchae points out for the nth time, and like always that doesn’t deter you, as you gaze lovingly upon where the soon-to-be former captain Heesung was talking to Riki about leading the team, a position quite coveted which you were very proud of Riki for acquiring. The pride that swelled in your heart was immense, but the cold words you heard Riki utter were like a small pin-prick on your heart. He was tense from the game, and let’s be honest, you’d always managed to survive the weight of his brash words. But why did this one hurt so much? Were you reaching your breaking point, finally? No wonder you’d tipped and already decided to get over him last night. Snapping yourself out of these negative emotions, you decided to busy yourself a bit away from the bleachers and Heesung and Riki, focusing on Eunchae as she tried to decide where to grab a snack before you both went off to your own houses. 

“I hate Y/N L/N. I wish she just left my life, because she’s what makes it worse.”

The sound of his voice has always been melodious to you. It had a deep timbre and was almost soothing. But right now, you felt anything far from soothed. Your throat was closing up into a lump, and you huffed slightly as you blinked away tears. Eunchae’s eyes were blown wide in shock, and were slowly beginning to narrow in anger. Your movements were almost automatic as your hand reached out to stop Eunchae from storming out from your hiding spots’, the fuming girl looking like she was ready to punch Nishimura across the face immediately. The tears were burning into your lower lash line like furious embarrassment, making you more and more smaller, wishing now more than ever that the ground swallowed you whole. You kept telling yourself over and over again, that this wasn’t the first time you’d heard words of this type uttered against you by him. But it was like a disenchanting spell on you, the way a veil lifted off your eyes. A crack in the rose tinted looking-glass you always stared at him through. 

“Y/N”, Eunchae’s voice is a careful whisper, sensing your vulnerability as your best friend. She knew you long enough to tell that those extremely cruel, mean words did more than just a regular rebound on your thick skin. She was cooling down in an attempt to comfort you, rubbing your arm in support. Your lower lip was wobbling, and you felt like someone had slapped you hard across the cheek. You weren’t that annoying to put up with, were you?

Your heart felt stomped on at that point, and you wanted nothing more than to get away. As shocking as it was, you couldn’t stomach being around Riki right now, and hastily grabbing Eunchae and making a beeline towards the exit, your downtrodden expression morphed to anger as your shoulder harshly bumped against Riki’s, who’s expression you couldn’t tell with the way you could only see red. Your decision was ironclad now, if it wasn’t firm already. This was the moment you’d decided to get over Nishimura Riki. 

The touch of your shoulder against his was like a static current being passed through his skin, in the most pleasant way possible. Like he craved it. Riki was baffled, and even more so when he realized it was you, and your usually ever-present adoration from him being blatantly missing, even in this short interaction, if it even be called that. He felt a twinge of concern for you, which he suppressed easily. This was the Y/N he was talking about. Any emotion for you rather than disgust? No thank you!

However, it was strange. For the first time in your life, you felt almost nothing for Nishimura Riki. And for the first time in his life, he felt something for you. 

It’s been a week since the fateful basketball game. You’ve been through the stages of grief quite quickly, storming through each of them with Eunchae helping you along, although your headstrong need to get better did worry her, that you weren’t actually processing your pain to heal. But to hell with all that. No, you wanted to eviscerate any remaining thought of Riki from your head immediately. The school day seems to be quite regular, with spring break just a mere two weeks away, that had people buzzing with low energy in the hallways, all in the state of deciding their spring break plans. Your spring break plans weren’t anything fancy, or anything at all rather - with the main idea being that you’d while away the time with your best friend, doing all the fun activities you could possibly do. And a break that you were sure would be the final nail in the coffin that contained the corpse of your feelings for Riki, the dark haired boy who up till now kept an iron grip on your heart.

The boy in question, like you, had also spent the previous week raging through some emotions. But in his case, rather he found them very confusing and very out of character. Of course, he wasn’t self actualised enough to work through them, and that led him to create a stubborn mindspace - that you, Y/N L/N were messing with his head by purposely ignoring him. He just couldn’t stop thinking about you, your presence and the recent lack of. Your voice wasn’t greeting him in the homeroom every morning anymore, and it was a change many had noticed, but not yet commented on. He found this pit in his stomach from the first week, the immediate day after the match, when he saw you sitting in class - head bent, hair falling over your face messily. And for a fleeting second, his hand had to fight off the urge to get up and brush them away. Your eyes looked slightly swollen, with a faint bloodshot look, like you’d spent the night crying rather than sleeping. It made his chest ache and his head spin slightly. What the hell? When the hell did he feel sorry for Y/N L/N? When the hell did he feel anything for Y/N L/N?

That was about three days ago, and that same pit in his stomach has been growing ever since. He, for whatever reason, missed you. Instead of coming face to face with this fact, he turned his back on it, and it was killing him. Pinpricks of pain would shoot through him whenever he noticed you deliberately changing your path on noticing him walk towards your way. God, it’s like he was a hostage to your feelings all these years, and automatically he felt guilty of thinking about you that way. You just liked him right? Why was he even so rude to you?

His behavior, and his demeanor didn’t go unnoticed by all of his friends, even the basketball team, who were more than aware of your absence at practice anymore. Whatever you were doing to remove Riki from your life might be working in your favor, but it was ruining him. 

His brain felt like someone was swirling its contents around with a spatula, making a mess of his thoughts and his emotions. He hadn’t wasted a moment in spilling his dilemma to Sunoo, and invariably the guys he was closest to on the basketball team - Jake, Sunghoon, Jay and Heesung. The team itself were all in all pretty much aware of how the youngest was going through quite the mind-boggling series of epiphanies (if it could even be called that. Jay liked to refer to it as just a dumbass waking up from his stupidity sleep). 

“Dude, I just don’t know anymore. Her not being there is very odd to me? I just can’t get used to it.” Riki sighs, shaking his head as he thumbs around his packet of Cheetos, slumping against the cafeteria wall, while the rest of his group gathered around him like a pack, eagerly listening in. “But isn’t that what you wanted? So there must be something else then? Maybe you didn’t mind her as much as you let on?” Jake inquired, his head tilting like a confused puppy. That had Riki scratching his head again. He saw you this morning by your locker. You were catching up with Eunchae, both of you laughing boldly to whatever Eunchae had just said, and there was a glow on your face as your eyes crinkled in amusement, which made a heartbeat skip in his chest. He was staring longingly at you, and it seemed like you noticed, because your eyes met his in scrutiny - your single glance making him feel like that six year old at the playground again. 

When you were in freshman year, you had developed a fascination with reading horror novels and mangas and watching horror movies very frequently. Something about spirits and the occult had interested you very much, and many people around you knew about this hobby of yours. If anyone had any doubts about the intricacies of rituals and possessions, spells and witchcraft, they’d just go to you. Right now, Riki thinks that’s exactly what’s happening to him - you’d used your occult knowledge to put a spell on him. Of course, he knew how ridiculous he sounded. But he felt like he was bound to you, and couldn’t shake off your spell no matter how much he tried. And it was purely on him. This was just all so,so confusing, which he decided not to voice out to his friends until he himself had gotten a grip on what was happening to him. How he kept thinking about your little habits. Day before yesterday, he found himself soaked in sweat and thirsty beyond comparison after practice. Parched and defeated, he stumbled along to the locker room to find his flavored water that one of his teammates usually kept in his locker for him, only to come up empty handed. 

“Jake, have you seen my flavored water? I figured you usually put one in my locker.” He asked nonchalantly, only to find Jake, and the rest of the team that entered the room in a state of sly smiles, stifled giggles and shock. 

“Dude, we never did any of that. Y/N did that, she’d purchase the fancy water for you and put it in your locker before we came for practice.” 

It made him feel different. He was blinking slow, and his brain was sluggish. You did that for him? God, you were so sweet, weren’t you. He already felt a bit sad about not seeing your bright grin that you directed to him in the morning (even though he always dismissed it with ignorance), but this was the cherry on top. You had loved him to death, and now he was a dead man walking without you. 

“He looked at you, you know.” Eunchae is careful in her observation, but she knows you noticed too. Your pupils seem narrowed, and your lips are drawn in a tight line as you contemplate that look he gave you. You still couldn’t fight off the feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you met his eyes - those gorgeous, beetle-black eyes that had a magnetic pull to them. But within the haze of your flusteredness, you’d managed to catch the slight look of misery in them. He was looking at you like he was an injured puppy, lost without you. But your resolve was stronger. With the utmost focus, you managed to drive away the maddening thoughts of the possibility of him missing you away, and walked away with Eunchae. 

Over the weekend, Riki had realized that being away from you was driving him insane. So on Monday, he was pulling his chair close to yours in the classroom, the metallic screech against the wooden flooring making everyone turn their heads to the scene, their eyes widening in shock at what was unfolding in front of their eyes. How on Earth was Nishimura Riki sitting next to Y/N L/N? Your thoughts were also very similar to the rest of your classmates, because what was happening right now? Riki, the boy you’d put your heart dangerously on the line for was right here, sitting next to you. His movements were awkward and he was fiddling with his fingers while casting shy glances towards you, reminding you of the scared six year old version of him you’d met at the playground. There is a faint red crawling up his pale ears, and he clears his throat roughly, before saying “Is it alright if I sit here?”

Your all consuming feelings seemed to come back like a crashing wave on the shore the moment he uttered those words to you, and you just nodded wordlessly, too shocked to say anything. You look too pretty this morning, and it’s messing with his head. Riki’s beating himself up internally, because this wouldn’t be so difficult if you weren’t so goddamn beautiful for some reason. He nods when you do, and then gets to his work. His proximity feels dizzying to you, and the scent of his cologne makes it harder for you to focus on the work in front of you. He’s biting into his lip hard, to suppress the urge to just hold your hand. The smell of your shampoo, the warmth of your thigh being barely centimeters next to you. You’re both so horribly blind and it is just painful to you both, unbeknownst to each of you. 

Nishimura Riki liked you. He really, really liked you. And as he turned his head to see your face, accented by the golden sunlight and eyes sparkling like dewdrops in the early morning, he knew that even if he wanted to run, he couldn't. He was trapped under your spell, and the thought of it made him smile. 

The following days are filled with such odd interactions with Riki. He always found an excuse to find you first in classrooms, or walk you to the cafeteria. You suddenly found yourself back at basketball practices again, but this time forcefully dragged to the court by Riki, and an amused Eunchae in tow. He was there to offer you snacks and drinks from the vending machine. He helped you with homework and you helped him with his. Whatever diabolical game he was playing was working wonders on you, because suddenly all you could see behind your closed eyes was his gorgeous face. 

The rest of the student body isn’t blind to his newfound affection for you. It’s all they’ve been talking about the entire time. His teammates slap his back in teasing jests while he shoos them all away, all the while that smile never leaving his face. 

“There’s no way!” You’re laughing hard, and yours and Riki’s shared giggles are quite audible over the soccer field. You’re both sitting on the grass just after practice, where Riki’s cooling off in the gentle breeze blowing across the grass. He’s telling you about some antics he had put up in class to get away from not turning in assignments, which involved a fake rubber rat and a very scared Calculus teacher. You’re wiping tears from your eyes from the laughter while Riki shakes his head in amusement. The breeze blows a single leaf to land right on top of your head, and it makes you giggle harder. 

He shuffles a bit closer to you, arm raising up to remove the leaf from your head. His breath is warm as it fans across your warming cheeks, the narrowed distance between you both not being lost on either of you. His eyes meet yours, and you’re still a goner for them. He gulps, Adam’s apple bobbing in nervousness, yet he makes no attempt to move away. Instead, he feels a bold surge in him. His finger loops around the bow on your school uniform, tugging the ribbon and invariably, you, forward towards him, making the breath in your throat hitch, and your eyes becoming wide as saucers. His eyes dip to your cupid’s bow, and scan over your lips and how they’re parted. Riki spends not a second more pressing his lips to yours, and you’re in heaven. 

The walk back to your house is full of shy touches, and the warmth of your hand in his. Riki’s lips are still tingling where yours were just moments ago. He can’t even begin to fathom how he ended up here - from loathing you to wanting to kiss you again. He was addicted to you and wanted more of you. But these things needed to be paced, and Riki wanted it done right. Bidding you goodbye in front of your house, where you left him with another giggle-pressed kiss to his cheek and a warm buzz filling his body, he was absolutely enamored by Y/N L/N.

The next day, he wakes up and it’s a good day. It’s a good day because he’s going to ask you out finally. He wanted to pinch himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming, just because of the implausibility of the situation. There was a brightness surrounding the boy all throughout, a contrast to his regular attitude. Sunoo and Taki had been updated already, and he was planning to tell the team, the rest of his friends during practice, after which he would ask you on a date during your regular after-practice hangouts. Except for the life of him he couldn’t find you, at all. It was unfortunate that today was the day of the announcement of the student council election results, for which classes were mostly halted, since the student council was quite a big deal 

He’s scanning around to find you amongst the crowd of the assembly where the results were to be announced - only to spot you a bit later. Also, he notices that you’re not alone. You’re grinning (a bit too much for his liking, if he's being honest) at Yang Jungwon, the boy who was the sure-shot winner of the President position. You’re too close to him, and it makes his heart clench. He’s biting his tongue until it almost bleeds. He doesn’t get an opportunity to speak to you, as the event commences. He just decides to wait till later, ignoring the pain in his chest he got from seeing you with another guy. 

“The President of this year’s student council is Yang Jungwon.” There’s a smattering of loud applause, and even Riki joins in half-heartedly, still wounded over what he was previously. “The position of Vice President goes to his running mate, Y/N L/N!”. 

He’s still in his place, though his heart bursts with pride and joy for you, his eyes drinking in your excited run up to the stage, shaking hands with the Principal of the school. Your face is broken into the biggest smile ever, and your eyes are shining from pure happiness. Why didn’t you tell him? Why didn’t he know you were going for it? Or that Jungwon was your running mate?”

But all in all he’s very, very happy and proud of you, so he squishes down that ugly feeling of jealousy in him, and focuses on how you somehow look directly right at him. Your smile drops a little when you notice he isn’t clapping, a fact Riki himself didn’t realize, too busy staring in awe at you. It takes Eunchae’s loud hollering in the crowd to break you out of your stupor and your return to your regular state. 

He’s changing out of his practice clothes, feeling a bit down from the events that actually happened today and how he’d expected it to go. He hadn’t been able to catch a moment alone with you after the ceremony, and four of the older members of the team were missing from practice today too, since Jay was the treasurer of the previous session, he had to oversee the handing over of the duties to the newer batch. Practice, because of that, ended up being him, and the benchwarmers and people he didn’t really know all that well. It was something he had to get used to as the new captain, so he figured this would serve as a good preview. He was talking to another benchwarmer of his grade, Junhee, while changing. Junhee wasn’t necessarily a good person, if Riki was honest. He always hung out with the rash crowd and got into fights because of his crass nature. He placed the small box of chocolates he’s managed to quickly buy for you from a store outside school, a sticky note with your name and a congratulation scrawled on it, down on the metallic bench as he gathered up the rest of his things. This doesn’t escape Junhee’s notice, who smirks lazily as he spots the name on the post-it. 

“No way, Nishimura. She did it, huh?”

Riki already doesn’t like the way he refers to you as just someone, and it sets his skin aflame. “Hmm?” he responds half-heartedly, not at all interested in maintaining a conversation with Junhee of all people. “Well, doesn’t it make sense, Nishimura? She’s into that horror shit right? Clearly she’s made a voodoo doll of you and forced you to love her. Manifestation shit, am I right?”

Riki’s blood is boiling as he hears what Junhee is saying, but for some reason he says nothing back. It’s like he’s trapped in this vortex in his mind fueled by the insecurity he felt from seeing you with Jungwon, or how he felt out of the loop about your co-curricular adventure. Staying mum, he just grabbed the chocolate box, and turned around, only to gasp in shock to see you standing right there. Your mouth is twisted downwards in disappointment, and you’re staring at him with absolute loathing in your eyes right now. He rushed forward towards you, ready to explain, and also wanting desperately to punch the snickering Junhee behind him, who was now slinking away from the scene. 

It feels like there is a knife in your back and twisting itself in your flesh all over again. There is a panic rising in your throat, suffocating you overwhelmingly. It’s jarring and mind-boggling. So before Riki gets to you, you run.

Eunchae is gathering you up in her arms as your inconsolable state renders you helpless, slumping on the floor of your bedroom, finding it harder to breathe as the sadness keeps washing over you in painful crashes, making you feel weaker and weaker as the time goes. 

“Why does he hate me, Eun? He kissed me, didn’t he? So why is he so cruel?”

The six boys in Riki’s room are trying their best with damage control, as they all had rushed over to his house when Riki had texted them in a panic and explained what had gone down. “But why didn’t you defend yourself in front of Junhee in the first place man?”, Taki asks frustratedly, tugging at his hair. Riki frowns, trying to ignore the flashes in his head of your heartbroken face while his chest aches. “I kept thinking about her and Jungwon. I treated her terribly before all this, didn’t I? I just kept thinking how she might like Jungwon now.” His eyes are downcast in sadness, and his voice is broken. Pulling up a chair right in front of Riki, Heesung plops down and holds Riki up by the shoulders, squaring him up. “Riki. Go. Go right now and apologize, before you lose her even more.” Riki is crying harder now, and wiping his tears, he breaks and finally tells them. “I don’t think I want to be without her, Heesung. I want her love, no matter if it drives me to my end.”

Riki sees how Eunchae slipped out of your house to walk towards the supermarket, no doubt to get you both some consolation food. He takes this moment to approach your front door, knocking furiously in nervousness and apprehension. It’s now or never. 

You open the door, assuming it’s Eunchae who left something behind before she left, so seeing Riki - messy hair, lips bitten to the extreme and bloodshot eyes standing on your front porch knocked the wind out of your lungs. Ready to slam the door on his face, his long hand stops you from doing so, pleading “Y/N please, please just listen to me. It wasn’t how it happened. I didn’t agree with Junhee at all. I like you, Y/N L/N, like it’s breathing. Being away from you makes me lose my mind, and I know I haven’t been the best to you in the past. But please, Y/N. I need you to give me a chance. I need you.”

There’s warm tears flowing down your face, and even in this state Riki thinks you’re beautiful. The porch light shines on your face and you look angelic. He hopes it showed in your mercy as well.

“Why didn’t you disagree?” you sniffle, sweater paws raising up to wipe away some of the tears on your face. The dejected tone with which you ask him makes him feel a deep tug in his heart, aching and sad. “I felt. Jealous. And angry, that Jungwon was so close to you, and that you hadn’t told me about being his running mate. And I know that doesn’t excuse my actions. I just felt, I don’t know. Out of the loop.”

“I wanted to surprise you with the vice president's news.” You mumbled, head down. Riki hesitantly moved toward you, and slowly patting your head, he said “I was surprised, baby, and so, so proud of you. I felt so proud of my girl up there.” He says hoarsely, hoping that his sincerity is as evident as much as he feels it. 

The breath gets knocked out as he groans through his mouth with the impact of your crushing hug. You have your face burrow into his chest, crying softly but also laughing slightly, wetting his shirt. He doesn’t spare a moment to wrap his arms around you tightly, fearing that letting go would mean that he’d lose you again. He sniffs in the soothing and familiar scent of your shampoo and mumbles into your hair, “I don’t know what spell you’ve casted on me, Y/N L/N. But I want to be under it forever.”

The sunlight, Riki thinks, just manages to make you so beautiful that it makes Riki speechless every single time. A lot has changed since the playground and the years after that. And a lot more changed within the last year too. You and Riki are midway through your senior year now. He was sad when he had to bid farewell to the older members of the basketball team, who were practically like brothers to him now. You continued your duties as vice president, though the shared activities you had with Jungwon, still a sore spot for Riki, made him pout adorably, which you always kissed away with a laugh. Riki was the basketball captain now, which added new responsibilities to his shoulder, which he carried excellently. The evidence of which was the recent basketball game that he’d just won with the team. The pep rally, and most of the team was still loitering around the court (Junhee was out. It was one of the first things Riki did as captain, in fact). Riki had sneaked you out to that fateful soccer field where you both had first kissed, and a beautiful sense of deja vu hit him as he looked at you in wonder - how you’d managed to put up with all of him was still a mystery to the boy. But, when you looked to meet his eyes - those dazzling, black eyes that glittered under the setting sun, you both realized - you were both enchanted by each other.

boyfriend texts.

엔하이픈 니키 ୨୧ idol ！female reader social media fluff established relationship + cw. mention of kissing mention of skinship no stated timestamps ( other )

was supposed to post this after his aotm but i already know he did great ! >0<

𓇻   ॱ˖ 𝑂ℎ, 𝐴𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑙𝑠 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑘 ℎ𝑎𝑖𝑟, 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑛𝑜 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎

──ॱ˖ ❀ enhypen hyung line and their pink obsessed girlfriend. genre fluff. warnings pet names, swearing, yn is like a pink pinterest girl | enhypen x fem!reader.

lee heeseung ( 이희승 )

to be honest you weren’t really his type.

he mostly went for girls that had a style more similar to his.

when he first met you it was kinda overwhelming just looking at you LOL

you were jays older sister, he didn’t even know jay had a sister until the day he met you.

you were picking jay up from one of their hangouts.

in a pink car…

heeseung cringed when he saw that not only were you in a pink car but also your whole entire outfit was pink.

but he was also like “she’s kinda hot…”

that night he did some digging through jays instagram following and found his pink obsessed sister.

“unintentionally” of course.

he also unintentionally messaged you as well.

and the rest is history.

“this is totally ruining my street cred.” heeseung whined as he sat in the passenger seat of your pink convertible, “I feel like a passenger princess.”

“you’d be the prettiest passenger princess ever.” you teased kissing his cheek before staring the car and backing out your driveway.

“I should be driving you, why are we taking your car anyway?”

“because I need you to take photos of me, and the car needs to be in the view, it completes the outfit and makes me look good.” you respond like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“you always look good, why does that matter!?”

park jongseong ( 박종성 )

he feeds into your pink obsession like no other

he tries his best to act like he doesn’t want too but somehow, he’s always the one pulling out his card at the cashier.

it’s like the angels brought you to him because you always make his days less boring.

“if you like the scent with the blue bottle why am I paying for that one?”

“because it’s pink!”

when he’s out with his friends at the mall, he’s always picking up pink little trinkets that he feels like you’d like.

sometimes they’re not so small.

“you got me the pink chanel bag!” you exclaimed as you opened the box he passed to you, “with the bow too!”

as soon as he came through the door after his hangout he had a smirk on his face and silently passed you a black shopping bag.

“I was gonna save up and get it.” you say leaning into his side as you examine the bag, “what the hell jay.” you say to your boyfriend who just shrugs his shoulders in a I don’t care way.

“you have too much money to waste.” you lecture causing jay to laugh.

“yeah, and I love wasting it on you.” he teases before leaving a kiss on your forehead.

sim jaeyun ( 심재윤 ) cd is playing

literally lets you do anything to him.

he loves his pink obsessed girlfriend.

even if that means she’s putting pink bows in hair every second.

finds the way you like pink so much endearing.

he let you decorate the apartment you both live in together.

“bro you have a pink toaster?”

“oh yeah, yn picked that up the other day.”

remember when I said he will let you do anything to him?

he would definitely let you do those tiktok trends on him.

“babe what are you doing?” jake asked you as you picked up a roll of pink ribbon and sat on the couch beside him.

“just something…” you said grinning before cutting the piece of ribbon and gesturing towards his arm, “pass me your arm.”

he looked and you confused but leaned over towards nevertheless.

he watched as you tied a perfect bow around his upper arm, “uh yn?”

“isn’t it cute! wait let me get my phone.”

he couldn’t help but laugh as he watched you run into your shared room.

park sunghoon ( 박성훈 )

you were a youtuber

you were known for your, grwm, room yours, day in my life and loving pink

he doesn’t even know how he pulled you

in his eyes you were kind of a celebrity.

he could’ve sworn he seen you on his sisters pinterest once.

he’s been in a few of your videos.

most of the time he holds the camera for you.

your viewers love how different you guys are.

he’s the most funny in your shopping videos.

“this whole cart is pink yn.”

in the background of your videos when you’re going your grwm’s all you’ll see is a man decked out in all black sleeping in a pink bed with fluffy pillows surrounding him.

sunghoon held the camera for you as you walked through the store for your new video.

“oh my gosh!” you say before rushing towards the thing that caught your eye, “wouldn’t this be so cute for my place?” you said asking your boyfriend who gives you an unimpressed look.

“do you really need a pink kettle?”

“I don’t know how I didn’t get one sooner.” you say smiling innocently as he shakes his head.

“just put it in the cart.”

delicate | nishimura riki

౨ৎ ## love so delicate like yours, synopsis: you've realized how far you've gotten with your boyfriend now that both of you are adults.

includes: 1.9k words | soft fluff | yn is anxious asf but riki comforts them | we love reassurance | movie notebook reference 😎 | yn got a tattoo and it makes riki fall in love with them more 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️

extra: at this point, all of the members are taylor swift coded | soft love is the best love | yn is me because im also 18 and i dont wanna pay taxes D:

likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated! <3

[below the cut]

you sighed as you laid yourself flat against the blankets. you smiled in delight as if your troubles and worries left you. 

“school’s over.” you said, feeling your chest heavy. you recalled the school memories that you’ve experienced; both happy and sad, now that you’re taking the next chapter of your life; college. 

it’s leaving a bittersweet feeling on your whole body. 

“it is.” you looked over your shoulder, to see your boyfriend, riki fiddling with his yearbook. his fingers spotted towards the back of the book, heartfelt messages and inspiring words that his friends wrote for him. 

you’re in riki’s backyard, inside of a treehouse both of you built since children with the help of your parents. you’re so lucky your dad is a constructor. 

riki is sitting, one leg sticking out and one knee bent as he leans into the wooden walls. this position allows you to admire him from below as the sunlight flashes on his beautiful features. 

he’s reading every single message with sincerity and care, from his senior friends that he will probably never see again and his younger juniors that he can’t annoy anymore. 

“i can’t believe we’re gonna be college students now. where we have to pay off debts, start our career paths, those people who are gonna be closer to 20 than 16 - it’s just,” you took in a breath. “surreal. surreal that we are growing up.”

you had always had a fear of growing up. not wanting to achieve the things and goals you’ve planned on time. you felt like you’re rushing to do everything at once before it becomes too late. you always wanna stay 16 forever; forever naive to understand the real world. how you’re closest friends will separate from you. how everything you’re experiencing right now will be just a memory. 

riki glanced down on you where you’re staring off of space. he can sense the anxiety in your tone. 

he closes the book after he was staring at a picture. a picture titled, “best couple” and it’s a picture of the both of you standing next to each other, smiling widely. he scooted himself, making himself comfortable once he lays down next to you. his back lays flat, mimicking your position. 

“are you scared?” riki likes to question the obvious, but it helps you reflect on your feelings; how fear is just a feeling.

“just a little anxious just all,” you confessed, looking at riki whose eyes never left yours. “i’m sure it will disappear soon. i mean, everyone experiences this.” you reassure yourself and riki sense it. 

“mhm,” riki mumbles. “it’s okay to feel anxious, the future is scary.” he looks down. “it’s only a matter of time how you’re gonna handle it. you create your own future.” 

his words ring in your head. he’s right.

riki took your silence as a way that you agree with him. 

he then glanced down towards your arm, a black-inked drawing that attracted him. riki scooted closer, his body turned to yours. he propped himself up with his elbow.

no matter how close the proximity is between the both of you, it still makes you nervous til this day. especially with how much older and mature-looking your boyfriend of 6 years is. 

“your parents aren’t mad about this?” riki gently poked on your arm, eyes analyzing the beauty that you’ve decided to put on your arm. 

it’s beautiful, he thinks. 

“not anymore, i’m 18 now.” you huffed out. you remembered the horror on your parents’ faces but a sigh of defeat when they realized you’re now responsible of yourself. it makes you chuckle their panicked expressions, but it made them realize that you’re not gonna be their little 4 year old reckless daughter anymore. 

“i can imagine your mom shrieking.” riki giggled which made you scoffed because he wasn’t wrong. 

“your birth flower?” riki asked, his fingertips gently tracing the traces of your birth flower. 

your eyes widened a bit at his sudden touch then you looked down at how focused riki was. his eyes were staring at it as if your tattoo was a museum. 

your heart beat quickened at the sight. 

“the flower that i drew for you in your math notebook in 6th grade.” riki smiled, realizing how much time flies since you guys called it official since middle school. you’ve remembered the nervousness riki’s hands were fiddling when he made a bouquet of origami flowers that he made each week that he fell in love with you. you thought it was silly. riki has always been caring and kind to you so it was natural for you to reprociate the feelings back. 

“i thought you threw your old notebooks away..” his voice still remains soft and delicate, still smiling at your tattoo.

“i ripped the page and kept it since.” when you were going into your freshman self, you looked back into the notebooks to reminsince your middle school memories. you’ve came across a drawing — no other than riki’s in your notebook. you ripped it out and hid it in a safe spot until you get a tattoo of it ever since.  

some people thought you guys weren’t gonna make it past middle school — even you too, but since both of you got in the same highschool, it is still strong. a strong string holding your relationship tight. yes, with hormones acting up and puberty getting in the way, there were times where you guys had fought and argued together to the point it was nearing breaking apart but both of you shouldn’t let it slide. not when it has reached this far. 

although your boyfriend has grown up, there are occasionally times where he teases you and becomes childish around you, it makes you reminsince how he still has a soul of his 12-year old self. especially moments where he look similar to a duck, which made you think about how much duck plushies you have on your bed because it reminds you of riki. 

you’re happy that you’re growing up with him.

“a penny for your thoughts?” 

you gasped lightly, realizing that you’re spacing out. you looked at him and you see a small smirk implemented on his face, curious of what your pretty head is thinking of.

your face relaxes, trying to calm yourself. you’re nervous over nothing.

you looked down at your hands, then glance at riki’s hand comfortably resting, then back to your hands. your fingers slowly creep upon riki’s fingers, slowly rubbing them with yours. you smiled at the sight.

“it’s insane to think about how much we’ve grown.” you paused. “together.”

riki’s eyes looked at the sight, his heart beat echoing and growing louder. no matter what you do, you always make him think irrational. he then glances at you smiling when you’re playing with his fingers. “not many people believed in us lasting this long, not even me. i was worried if one of us lost feelings, found someone else better, or get something in our way, but im glad that we didn’t give up.” you looked at riki where his attention was diverted to you. he raised an eyebrow to indicate that he was listening.

“i’m happy that i’m dating you, i can’t express how much i adore you, how much you mean to me, i’ve never felt love this strong before — you’re just everything to me. i can’t imagine laughing harder than with anyone else, smile so much with anyone else. with you, it’s different. thank you for loving me.” 

you’re cringing on the inside at how much you confessed in such a short amount of time. you’re met with silence from your boyfriend who seem atonished from your words. you’re embarrassed, pulling back your fingers to cover your blushing cheeks in front of your boyfriend.

riki’s lips twitched, happy for you to express your feelings more comfortably now compared to the past situations. (one of the reasons that you’ve guys argued before) his chest felt light, his grin becoming bigger when you’re hiding from him.

you hear the blankets rustled, you felt riki’s arm slowly snake around your arm to remove your hand from your face. you removed your embarrassed hands and your eyes followed his hand clasping onto yours. the sight of his veiny hands makes you silent.

you admire the two of you holding hands. your stomach was feeling butterflies just as it was the first time riki confessed his feelings to you. riki twists your wrist, allowing you to see the sight from all angles. it looks so perfect. your hand perfectly structured to hold his. 

“you’re just as perfect as to what i am seeing right now.” riki spoke with a soft tone, chuckling when he kept twisting and turning your wrist. “you have a place in my heart no one else could ever have. my heart is so full of you i can hardly call it my own. i choose you. and i’ll choose you over and over. without a pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat, i’ll keep choosing you. as long as i’m alive, you will always be loved.”

you’re speechless at your boyfriend’s words to the point you feel like crying. riki still kept smiling at you, giggling. you saw the crescents formed in his eyes whenever he smiled at you and it never fails to make yourself love him more.

riki took this opportunity to lift himself up, hovering above you. he pecked your forehead. you felt his warm lips touching your skin and the goosebumps always forms whenever he makes you flustered.

you looked up at him, surprised. he looked down at you with his head tilted and a scrunched nose like a puppy, as if he was proud to do that.

nothing but an exchange of loud heart beats matching with one another and genuine giggles back and forth. 

riki then leaned in towards you. you closed your eyes at the expected action. his lips touching with yours. electricity flows when he rubs his fingers on your hands. it always make you feel all tingly on the inside. 

riki then pulls back, “cute.” he teases you, making your cheeks grow hotter. “shut up.” you rolled eyes, earning a little laugh from him.

riki still doesn’t let go of your intertwined hands as he returns to his original position where you’re laying flat on the ground, shoulder to shoulder. 

“so your summer plans?” riki asked casually. he lifted his head as his arm was under his head to act as support.

you then touched your bangs, realizing that you still have that caramel-like highlights since march. you were starting to get bored of it.

you pursed your lips. “maybe dye my hair next week back to black.” 

riki’s eyes shined. “match with me.” he spoke without thinking. you turned your head to him, realizing that his hair is black now. 

your boyfriend likes it alot when both of you match. 

“if you bleach it next month to some color then what?” you pointed out because sometimes your boyfriend makes impulsive decisions on his hair whenever he sees a cool hairstyles. you’re not angry whenever he does this because he’s good looking with whatever hair color he has.

“i won’t bleach it, i promise. i’ll follow you.” riki spoke and it makes you chuckle that he probably doesn’t realize the importance of his words. “red? blue? silver, i’ll do it for you.” you froze at his sudden deep voice erupting from him. your heart beat also freezes when his lips touches the location of your tattoo. you looked down and see his lips pushed forward. your heart flutters once again.

“you’re dumb.” you spoke, eyes softening at what you were hearing. 

gosh, you really love this man.

riki smiles against your skin, looking up and your heart twists at an umfamiliar sight. “i can be that.”

LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME — NISHIMURA RIKI

SYNOPSIS — NISHIMURA RIKI’S GIRLFRIEND IS A WELL-KNOWN YOUTUBER. UNFORTUNATELY, HIS FRIENDS, HIS COMPANY, AND HIS FANS BELIEVE THAT HE’S JUST A DELUSIONAL FAN OF HERS.

PAIRING — IDOL!NI-KI X YOUTUBER!READER STARRING — NI-KI, READER, ENHYPEN, IVE’S WONYOUNG, LESSERAFIM’S CHAEWON, AESPA’S KARINA, NEWJEANS’ HAERIN WITH GUEST STARS ZB1’S RICKY, TXT’S BEOMGYU WARNINGS/NOTES (tba) — 100% CRACK, TEAM EDWARD GC ARE NOT IDOLS RELEASE DATE — 18TH JULY

PROFILES — 4LIFERZ | TEAM EDWARD

CHAPTERS — 1: TODAY’S SELFIE 2: SO SWEET 3: EVERYTHING WILL COME TRUE 4: MWAH! 5: WE'RE SO LUCKY 5: GOLDEN TICKET 7: HASHTAG LUCKY GIRL EPILOGUE: TOGETHER, YOU AND ME

TAGLIST — OPEN @sunpov @lukesboo @lambys-stuff @rikisgeef @hiekoo @sol3chu @sakiimeo @joyzluvr @femmefqtqle @1lovestrawberrymilk @jakeyverse @xeee334 @erisasleep @kyanmeai @sunooluuvr @dreeki @laurradoesloveu @kittsnewera @illvding @d-dilemma @unhakki @greentulip @clampclover @yourmyst4r @randomanothercreature @mheretoreadff @winabite

BEST FRIEND'S BROTHER.

NRKㅤ✶ ㅤ (⠀femreader⠀) . . . established relationship, suicide jokes, yn never changed his contact name poor riki, kinda corny soz, on the fifth slide it's supposed to say i'll tell my mom on her i forgot to type out tell bye.

IMPATIENT.

𝓢.ㅤ he had everything planned out but how's he supposed to wait when it comes to you?

PSHㅤ୨୧ ⠀ femreader⠀ . . .ㅤ fluff, established relationship, sunghoon pov, awkward ending oops idk how to end stuff, this is a repost cos i accidentally deleted it a while agoㅤ1147 words

sunghoon often gets overwhelmed by his feelings for you. sometimes the love he feels gets to be so intense that he doesn't know what to do, losing the ability to think rationally about anything that has to do with you.

he knew right away that he wanted to be the one to marry you but he held back for the four years and eight months that you dated, waiting until you talked about marriage first. you'd brought it up to him one morning, a simple conversation. one he replayed for weeks.

during those weeks he planned everything; his proposal. he bought a ring, bought tickets to paris (jake's idea—city of love and all that), booked a really nice hotel, and he had a whole itinerary for the day he planned on proposing. he's pretty sure he's going to be in debt for the rest of his life because of these expenses but it's worth it.

when he brought up the trip to you he simply played it off as something for your five year anniversary, it was close enough to the date so you didn't think much of it. five years was a long time so why wouldn't you do something special?

so on thursday morning, you rush to the airport because someone (sunghoon) didn't want to leave your embrace yet. thankfully, you made it on time, sunghoon holding tightly onto your hand to make sure he doesn't lose you in the crowd.

it takes fourteen hours to get from seoul to paris and another hour to drive to the hotel. the flight was.. okay. as good as a flight can be but god was it tiring, you don't think you and sunghoon have ever been as happy as you were to see a bed until tonight.

the next day you take it easy, spending most of it inside your hotel room, briefly stepping out to get dinner at some restaurant nearby. you're walking back, hands swinging back and forth slightly.

"what're we doing tomorrow?"

sunghoon hums, "it's a surprise,"

you knock your shoulder against his, "can i have a hint?"

"nope,"

you groan, throwing your head back while sunghoon smiles fondly at you. he loves you, he knows that. today, though, it feels like it's bigger than love. a lot bigger. you haven't even done anything significant today; it was practically just a regular day. okay, other than the fact that you were at a hotel in paris, but he ignores that part.

honestly, he isn't sure if there's a word deep enough to describe how he feels for you. it feels like he's drowning, sinking deeper and deeper every second that he spends with you and he's okay with that. more than okay; he's happy.

he wants to make you happy, too. he wants to spend the rest of his life seeing your smile and your laugh. he feels a slight wave of anxiety wash over him—what if he messes everything up? what if his proposal turns out to be awful?

he sighs, shaking those thoughts out of his head, instead focusing on you whine about how you need him to tell you what the surprise is. he just laughs at you, pulling out the key to the hotel room.

"i'll tell you tomorrow when we wake up, okay?"

"or now," you smile up at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. his hands instinctively go to your waist.

"i can't, baby,"

"i'm gonna stay up all night thinking about this,"

he leans down, placing a kiss on the crown of your head, "yeah, i'm sure you will,"

you don't stay up all night. in fact, you fall asleep almost right away, probably still exhausted from yesterday's flight. sunghoon wishes he could fall asleep as easily as you, but he can't. not when he's proposing to you tomorrow. the presence of the ring hidden inside his suitcase is too suffocating, it's like he can feel it in his hands already.

he pulls you closer to his chest, pressing his cheek against the top of your head. he really hopes that tomorrow will be your last day as simply boyfriend and girlfriend.

he falls asleep after you but he wakes up before you. he's glad that he did because it gives him the opportunity to stare at you. he likes when he wakes up before you; it gives him the chance to see you at your most peaceful, when all the stress from your life is missing.

he shifts, cupping your cheek with his hand, rubbing small circles against your skin. he stares at you for a few seconds longer before leaning forward to place a kiss on your forehead.

"g'morning,"

he smiles against your skin, "morning, baby. did i wake you up? i'm sorry,"

you groan, pulling away from him so that you can rub your eyes, "no, i was already awake,"

he hums and you sit up, stretching your arms out.

"i didn't forget about the surprise, by the way," you glance towards him, "tell me, pretty please,"

he's quiet when he speaks, licking his lips, "i love you,"

"i know you do. i love you too. is that your surprise?" you lay back down, the two of you facing each other.

"will you marry me?"

he doesn't think before asking you. it forces its way out of his mouth, not giving him any choice in the matter. at first he doesn't care, but soon you can practically see him go though all five stages of grief.

"wait, wait, wait," he presses his hand over you mouth when you begin to speak, "don't say anything. i—god, let me ask you for real. i want it to be special, not something i say randomly,"

you listen to him patiently, waiting for him to stop before pulling his hand away from your mouth, "that was special, silly,"

he gives you a dirty look, "uh, no. i don't think me proposing to you in a hotel bed is special,"

"i think so. it's like.. you really couldn't wait to ask me,"

"i couldn't wait,"

"and i can't wait to answer you,"

he stares at you, taking in your expression. you're smiling at him, a soft smile that he hasn't seen from you before. it's different than all your other smiles, he doesn't know why. this one feels like you can understand the feeling that he has for you; something way beyond love.

"will you marry me?"

you giggle, a grin breaking out onto your face, "can i answer this time?"

he nods.

"mhm, i'll marry you,"

"thank you,"

"you don't have to thank me,"

he smiles, "yeah, i do. thank you for letting me into your life all those years ago and thank you for letting me stay in it," he leans forward, pressing his lips against yours, "i love you more than love."

note. idk why i deleted this hello ... i think i hated it that's why LMAOOO

⋆𐙚₊ 𝐚 ‘𝔀𝓮’ 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐧 ‘𝓾𝓼’ ˚⊹♡

downbad!enhypen hyung line x fem!reader content(s): fluff, enhypen being down so horribly, terribly, bad, like whipped whipped for (y/n), (y/n) is sassy and loves to tease, pet names, one profanity, alcohol type: oneshot

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ synopsis: in which (y/n) doesn’t call them her boyfriend because they haven’t officially asked her to embark on an official courtship˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

⋆˙𐙚 L.HEESEUNG 𐙚˙⋆ “…you’re gonna be the death of me!”

“don’t you think this would look good on us?” heeseung asks as he lifts up a pair of couple-y beanies and looks at (y/n) expectantly.

(y/n) shifts her gaze between the two before she brings it down. “don’t they look too couple-y?”

“yeah, i mean that’s the point, righ—wait, what do you mean ‘too couple-y?’” the realization hits him late and (y/n)’s already walking out the store, bells hung on the door chiming behind her.

heeseung hastily puts back the beanies, panicky, before he runs out to follow her. “(y/n)! (y/n), wait! what do you mean by that?”

“by what?” the girl monotonously responds.

“there’s nothing wrong with wearing matching stuff, right? aren’t we a couple? or do you not like it?” heeseung worriedly bombards her with questions as he sticks behind her like a tail—almost stumbling entirely when she stops abruptly.

“we aren’t, though.”

“huh?”

“we aren’t a couple,” (y/n) corrects him and his eyes widen as lips gape—frantically moving to stand in front of her when she budges in the slightest.

“are you breaking up with me? please, (y/n). i-i don’t know what it is but i’ll make it up to you! please not like this, no. i don’t want to lose you,” heeseung pleads as his hands shakily grab her shoulders—much too soft to actually say he even put force but the way his fingers curl, securing onto her show that he’s more than ready to latch on for his life. “tell me. tell me what i did wrong.”

(y/n) stares at his face, the desperation and concern paint him so clearly and a guilty sigh leaves her. “we can’t break up if we weren’t together in the first place.”

now confusion settles over him. his brows knitting and doe eyes searching into hers. “what do you—oh.”

and finally putting the pieces together, a loud laugh escapes him while his not-girlfriend frowns, a small pout playing on her lips.

he coos while his thumb brushes over them. “aww, is that what this was all about?”

“heeseung, you—”

“(y/n),” he interjects with his voice laced with so much charm she just can’t refute. an endearing smirk threatens to appear on his face as he cups her cheek—looking down at her with the most tender and sincere gaze. “will you let me be your boyfriend? please?”

the air’s knocked out of the other at his soft little voice that instantly extinguishes any sort of fire in her as she instead, melts into his arms that magically made their way around her waist.

she clears her throat. “yeah, i guess. yeah.”

he finally lets the smirk form as he swoops down and pecks her forehead, eliciting a gasp of surprise from her and he chuckles at her expression. “now let’s get those couple-y beanies to celebrate our official first day as a couple, hm?”

“…yeah,” the girl bashfully replies with cheeks tinted in a shade of pink.

heeseung’s chest tightens at how cute she is to the point it’s hard to breathe and he squeezes her against him—pressing her face into his chest as he resists the urge to just gnaw at her head. “you’re just so—gosh, you’re gonna be the death of me!”

“hee, my makeup!”

the way his nickname rolls from her tongue so casually is music to his ears and he bites his lip, shutting his eyes as his head falls back. “i’m the luckiest person ever to have you as my girlfriend.”

⋆˙𐙚 P.JONGSEONG 𐙚˙⋆ “silver or gold?”

there’s something off. he can’t quite put his finger on it—but there’s something terribly wrong. and it’s not just because of his and (y/n)’s cuddle sessions with her hugs too short to even be called cuddles, or the lack of kisses from her and hesitant acceptance of his or even the way she sometimes cringes at the pet names he uses on her.

but also because of the way she treats him in general. she’s still affectionate—greeting him with the biggest, most beautiful smile, going out for lunch dates with him and paying for his order because “last time you paid for everything” which, in his perspective is mortifying because why?? would she?? do such a thing??

it’s his responsibility—or so he claims—to spoil her as much as possible. he wants to be the one to feed her, buy her all her silly little trinkets and take her out on shopping sprees and carrying all her bags so why?? it breaks him to see her act the way she is.

but at the end of the day, it’s still affectionate, isn’t it? as much as he can’t comprehend it, he sees it as his girlfriend wanting to treat him every once in a while to show appreciation or something—a self-hypnosis, one might say so he doesn’t fall into hysteria.

despite his suspicions however, he says nothing and lets things flow as he takes the opportunity to observe her more, in hopes he can at least make a small conclusion so he won’t upset her by asking the wrong thing.

and today’s the perfect time for it since they’re having another one of their lunch dates. he sits anxiously at their table as he watches (y/n) who’s still at the counter—having bumped with her friend and now she’s accompanying her as she orders.

“is that all you’re having?” (y/n) asks her friend who nods and right after, the former passes the cashier her card—surprising her friend to which she assures her it’s all fine. “no, i insist! after all, last time you paid for everything.”

jay who has been a loyal, attentive audience this whole time instantly feels himself being washed over with dread. small lips parting and hand resting on the left side of his chest as it dawns on him.

all this time…(y/n)’s been treating him like a friend. not a lover. it all makes sense now. the distance she put between them and the affections shown that are always in border between friend and lover but never more to the latter—he sees it now.

“jay? what’s going on?” (y/n) asks from her seat facing him. “you’re zoning out. hello?”

he just had a short circuit and her saying “jay” so simply is only rusting his gears from overtime working.

“‘jay?’”’he echoes with a small frown on his face. “why jay?”

his question baffled her and she emits a small confused yet amused scoff.

“that’s your name? what else am i supposed to call you?”

“baby, bae, darling, honey—” he starts listing out loving pet names and making her gape at his eloquence. she’s not sure if being so knowledgeable in this subject is really useful at all but it’s impressive. “there are so many you can use! just not just my name as it is. we’re not friends…right?”

ding ding ding! finally, the man gets it and (y/n) lets a mischievous smirk play on her lips.

“i’m pretty sure we are, though,” she teases and her date’s jaw detaches, crashing to the floor along with his heart in shards. she giggles and the sound itself revives him, now looking at her with eyes wide and lips pressed expectantly. “i mean, i don’t recall being asked to be someone’s partner so…”

an audible gasp leaves him before he reaches out to hold her hands in his on the table. “my love, i should’ve known. i shouldn’t have left things be unclear between us. so, silver or gold?”

his question confuses her. “huh?”

“for our couple rings. i’m using it to propose to you to be my girlfriend later. so, silver or gold? actually, diamonds will be best, right? you only deserve the best.”

“wait, slow down—”

“how many carats?”

“jay!”

“‘jay???’”

“…sweetie? babe??”

“so much better <3”

⋆˙𐙚 S.JAEYUN 𐙚˙⋆ “i can even be your doormat!”

it’s not a secret that sim jaeyun is sometimes the embodiment of a human puppy. so it’s not surprising to see him literally following (y/n) around like tail—even before they professed their love for one another.

the only difference now is that he’s much braver in initiating skinship to show his affections like fixing her hair, or cupping her cheeks, drawing circles on whatever part it is that he’s touching on her and even cuddling with her to the point that he’s practically sandwiching her onto the couch with his buried in the crook of her neck.

but he notices something: it’s always been one-sided. and that’s weird. because as far as he knows, one of (y/n)’s love languages is physical touch. but it’s not like she rejects any of his advances, she accepts them all. maybe she’s just not very keen on starting it, but is always up for it.

so he lets it be.

until at one point, it starts to bug him and eat him from the inside out, leaving him shriveled like a wilted flower lacking every single form of nutrient and water—and all the sun’s doing is just drying up every bit of moisture and drawing the life out of him.

“(y/n)…” jake croaks weakly as he crawls onto his phone that he previously threw onto his couch, now only a sliver of the man he once was with his cheeks hollow and lips chapped as his sickness riddles him. a terrible sickness caused by (y/n) deficiency.

the other end of the call rings a few times before the voice of his beloved sings through, instantly energizing him. “hello? jake?”

“(Y/N), I NEED YOUuUuUu~” he howls and (y/n) has to pull her phone away from her ear. “i’m SICK.”

concern fills her quickly after. “sick?? what happened? do you have a fever?”

she’s bombarding him with questions as she hastily puts on her shoes near her main door, ready to leave right after. the pitiful sob from him that follows after only heightens her worry.

“i’m sick…of missing you,” he finishes and (y/n) nearly trips over air just as she’s about to step to the door. “please come over and cuddle…please…?”

his desperate whimpers are just so adorable that it nearly shatters her resolve of playing hard-to-get. nearly.

squinting her eyes and crossing one arm under chest and hooking it to the other that holds her phone to her ear, she then hums questioningly. and gosh, does jake feel like every second is another hour taken from his life span.

“no.”

nevermind. he’s dead now.

“wh-what? what do you mean ‘no?’”

huzzah! he’s been resuscitated. he wants justice.

(y/n) captures her lip between her teeth—holding back her amused chuckles at his cute confusion. “that sounds like a very boyfriend-girlfriend activity, jake. and we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend…”

beep! beep! beep!

he…hung up??

(y/n) gapes and calls him.

“the number you’ve dialed is unreachable…” the automatic machine answers.

again.

“please leave a message after the beep!…”

again.

still no answer.

worry creeps in again as (y/n) slips in her foot back into her shoe which she took off mere minutes ago. just when she stands however, a persistent ringing of her door bell freezes her momentarily.

swinging the barrier between her and the source open, she’s met with surprise to see sim jaeyun, the man himself, down on his knees as he looks up at her with doe eyes glossed over.

“jake! wha—”

“we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend? what did i do? tell me, i’ll fix it!”

“you didn’t do anything!”

“i didn’t? the-then, why?”

(y/n) opens her mouth to answer when she suddenly realizes that him not doing anything is exactly the problem—and her momentary hesitation is enough to have him clasping his hands together in desperation.

“please please please, don’t throw me away! i love you so much, i won’t be able to live without you! please please, pretty princess? PLEASE!”

the girl’s eyes widen at his sudden pleads and she anxiously looks at the other doors in the corridor, hoping her apartment neighbors will disregard the chaos occurring. “jake! jake, stand up! stop doing this!”

“NO! you’re mad at me! i don’t know why but…still! is it because i’m too clingy? because i asked you to come over? sh!t! i should’ve been the one to come over not you! i’ll be better, i promise!”

“what?? no! there’s nothing wrong with that just listen to me and get—”

“NOOOO!! i’m not getting away! i’m not leaving! just keep me by your side! i’ll do anything! i-i can even be your doormat—here! right here!”

the sound of a rattling doorknob triggers (y/n)’s fight or flight and she seizes jake’s wrist that’s conveniently raised—thanks to his howls and pleads of “you said you love me!” and “love me backkkk~” respectively—and she hauls him into her apartment.

jaeyun’s eyes widen at the abrupt motion and he stumbles onto the floor of her house but before he can say anything, a pair of soft lips smash against his—ridding him of every thought as his hands instinctively reach up to cup her cheek and nape.

he limps backwards, now completely against the floor while (y/n) hovers and his vision darkens as his eyes shut—reveling in the addicting sweetness of her taste.

a small whine sounds from him when she pulls away and he chases after her lips—wanting nothing more but to relish in her essence endlessly yet her hand that gently pushes him down by the chest halts him.

she giggles at his dazed expression—his breaths shaky, eyes blown out and half-lidded as he peers up at her. “i do love you, jakey. i just said we weren’t a couple because you haven’t asked me out yet.”

“i haven’t?” he slurs like a drunken man, still on cloud nine from her kiss and his gaze casts frequent glances onto her glistening, rosy nubs. “must have been in my dream then.”

“yeah, must be,” (y/n) chuckles and sits on his lap before hauling him up—instantly getting engulfed in an embrace with his arms coiled around her waist and nose buried in the crook of her neck. feeling ticklish, the girl elicits a few titters which makes him smile against her skin.

“i can’t believe i let my princess feel so frustrated for so long,” he muffles into her. “but don’t worry, i’ll ask you now.”

“i’m all ears.”

“will you marry me?”

“HUH??”

⋆˙𐙚 P.SUNGHOON 𐙚˙⋆ "love me, please"

sunghoon is more emotional of a person than how he seems. he just hides himself well and even when others try their best to push him to the edge, he will never lose his grip on his thread nor walk the plank—able to pull himself up and return to the safe shores.

of course, he’s still human and thus, will never be completely impenetrable. one common weakness among those with strict discipline? alcohol.

“i don’t know why…she doesn’t love me,” sunghoon sobs into his arms as he’s hunched onto the counter and almost slipping off his stool. jake looks down at him before a sigh escapes. he was amused seeing his usually stoic and smiley friend act so sappy at first—but that was 3 days ago and he’s still being it since.

jake pats the other’s pack. “why don’t you ask her? i thought you guys confirmed your feelings for each other?”

sunghoon nods against his arm as a low groan rumbles through him. “we did…but then i overheard her saying to her friends that we ‘aren’t together’ and are just ‘two people who share mutual affections.’”

“maybe you misheard?”

a wail akin to a whale’s call sounds from the drunken lad and jake looks around frantically, embarrassed, and is for once thankful for the blaring DJ remixes that burst people’s ears.

“i didn’t. i heard clearly what she said, that’s why i ran away… i left her there… i screwed up our lunch plans… she’s gonna hate me more! it’s my fault! why did i just—WAAaaAaA!”

once again, his friend finds himself in a fluster, scared that someone’s going to think that a marine creature’s been illegally smuggled into the establishment—causing him to haul the taller lad onto his shoulders and out of the place of business.

“there you go. stay,” jake huffs as he laboriously drops his friend onto the bench outside before pulling out his phone. dialing a number, he then puts the gadget to his ear. “hello? sorry for calling you so suddenly but uh, sunghoon’s kind of in a situation i know you’re the only who can save him from. oh, no! it’s not anything dangerous! it’s just, well…”

after hearing his explanation, it doesn’t take long for the girl to zoom to the club and there, she meets a passed out sunghoon on a cold wooden bench and jake sitting on the edge of his seat—not having enough space due to the drunkard.

“hey, thanks for coming,” the slightly older male says with a smile and nods with gratitude at her. she reciprocates.

“so…you say he’s been doing this for 3 days straight—since he overheard me?” (y/n) confirms and jake’s affirmation elicits a long sigh from her. “dummy hoon. thanks for accompanying him, jake. i’ll take over from here.”

bidding goodbye, (y/n) then approaches the sleeping young man. her heart flutters at his delicate yet sharp visages that simply steal her breath away even when he’s doing something utterly mundane such as sleeping. her hand lifts to cup his cheek, flinching at the coldness of his skin. “sunghoon, wake up. hoon?”

she nearly has a cardiac arrest when the man’s eyelids shoot open and he springs to a sitting position before facing the blanched girl.

“(y/n)!” he exclaims cheerily with the most radiant beam before engulfing her whole against his figure—muscly biceps securing around her frame as she squeaks from the sudden embrace. she chuckles, adoring how he’s still able to be so gentle with her even whilst drunk. “hi, my love~”

the nickname brings a blush to her face that’s already mantling from the cold. “come on, let’s get you to the car.”

as soon as he’s in the passenger’s seat, (y/n) bends down slightly in front of him to secure his seatbelt but pauses when sunghoon’s head drops onto her shoulder—rubbing his forehead against the fabric covering her skin.

“(y/n)…you’re so warm,” he murmurs, eyes shut and lips parted. “if only you were really here.”

his words make the girl’s brows knit. ‘does he think he’s imagining me?’

click! the seatbelt connects and she shuts his door before going to the driver’s seat.

the drive is mostly quiet with sunghoon being drowsy and (y/n) busy with trying to get him home safely but the tranquility is broken by an unexpected monologue by the former.

“i do this again and again just to see you… and you’re always there. but i wake up and you’re gone…always gone,” sunghoon murmurs in his sleepiness, and (y/n)’s fingers tighten around the wheel at his confession—feeling her heartstrings getting tugged. “i love you so much, it hurts.”

(y/n) glances at him, feeling a surge of guilt and swallows dryly. “if the real (y/n) was here, what would you tell her?”

“i’d apologize for canceling our lunch date again. and tHeN! i’d apologize again and tell her i’ll do wAyYyYY better! i’ll be the BEST MAN she’ll ever have!” sunghoon exclaims in an inconsistent rhythm—bursting on some words and calm for the others. “the LAST one too! she’s going to end up with me, i’ll make sure of it.”

his drunken confession affects her more than she thought—butterflies erupting and tickling her from the inside out with their soft, rapid wings.

“oh, really?” she teases, an amused grin worn as she faces the road which isn’t unseen by sunghoon.

his sudden quietness confuses her but soon feels his scrutinizing gaze prickling at the side of her cheek—her peeking at him from her peripheral.

“woah. you’re the best version of (y/n) my brain’s made. you feel and look real…so warm and pretty like how my (y/n) really is… my gorgeous, gorgeous girl… hihihi…” his lovesick bashful giggles from his own comment instantly beats all her favourite music and artists, defeating all her playlists and reigns the throne.

his eyes upturned in a blinding eyesmile as cheeks and nose glow a bright red from both the alcohol and the lovey dovey, giggly mood he’s brought to himself. he’s so cute. a cutie pie.

by the time they arrive at his home, he’s onto his reason number whoever knows on his list of ‘why my-not-but-still-my-girl aka.(y/n) is the best girl.’

he flops on his bed when (y/n) drops him with a large grunt before joining his side in exhaustion. big mistake.

because now she’s caged within sunghoon’s beefy arms and as much as she loves nothing more than to stay in them—suffocate in them even, but he’d never let—she has to go home.

“sung—oof! sunghoon!” she grunts and wriggles in his unbudging grasp and just when she tries to slip through by sliding down vertically and off the edge of the bed, he nuzzles into the side of her head—drawing figures in her hair with the tip of his nose.

“love me, please,” he whispers and that instantly shuts down her motor—now completely still as she slowly turns to him. her eyes dance across his face that’s slightly scrunched and she can tell it’s because of what he overheard her say. he’s thinking about it again.

“i do love you, hoon—so so much that it physically squeezes the air out of me sometimes. i only said what i said because i realized we never made it official and whenever i hinted at you, you just acted like it was nothing. just going with it without accepting or denying anything,” (y/n) explains in a whisper as her finger moves up to trace his features.

freezing suddenly when she reaches his mouth and the corners begin to curl up.

“so i just need to make things official and we won’t just be ‘two people who share mutual feelings together?’” he asks with clarity. the lack of muddled mumbles and dragged words instantly tell the other of his sobriety.

she looks up, taken aback to see him already staring down at her with the most endearing of gazes—shifting between her eyes constantly before letting it dance across her face and back to melting their gazes together.

“i guess so…” she mutters, flustered and belatedly shy from the proximity.

sunghoon catches his bottom lip between his teeth, finding the sight before him simply too adorable and presses a kiss on her forehead. “then, just as i am already yours, will you be mine?”

his concise offer makes her heart skip beats but it still doesn’t compare to hoon’s that’s running a mile a minute, vigorous thumps almost blending into one another and she feels it from the way he hugs her tight.

so much for mr.cool guy act.

“it would be my honour, hoon,” she replies with a cheeky grin and a second later she’s squealing from getting bombarded with butterfly kisses—unknowing of his struggle to keep himself together and not just crush her every bone from the cuteness aggression, finding her to be the loveliest ever.

ᡣ𐭩ྀི₊ ⊹ masterlist ᝰ.ᐟ✮⋆˙

𝜗𝜚 hi, it’s romi here!! thank you so much for reading to the end!! if you enjoyed it, don’t forget to leave a heart and reblog—they give me some motivation, ya know? but please do not spam like!! X♡X♡, romi ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

copyright © 2024 thinemoonshine all rights reserved

synopsis: riki knows you better than anyone else. includes: bridgerton au (barely), a little women reference, confessions of love, pre-marital kissing (the scandal!), gross old men, arranged marriage notes: @hoes4hoseok i hope you enjoy my timothee chalamification of riki, this one's for you girl🩷

there’s a thin line between love and friendship. your mother says she was friends with your father before she ever learned to love him, never in the way the poets rave, but in a way that made her life easier. in her words, “a love match is as rare as a diamond, dear. you shouldn’t hold out hope of one should it ruin your debut.”

it’s a shame, you think, that you can love someone so deeply and yet there’s no guarantee they’ll share the sentiment, nor a chance to see if what you feel is dwindling infatuation or true unyielding devotion. it’s improper to explore your options, greedy to want more than expected, and childish to yearn for love. yet you do.

your debut season approaches fast, and with it, the heavy promise of your hand to baron mortimer weighs your heart down like an anchor keeping you from daydreaming of the things you had read and researched about love.  he’s wealthy, titled, and twice your age. he would give your family a more comfortable life, save you from the shame of becoming a spinster if you do not find another suitable match your first season, and seems to be respectable enough despite his intent to marry you, a soon-to-be debutante he set his eyes upon years ago. it’s unnerving, but your mother speaks of him without disdain, so you keep your anxieties about his character at bay.

unfortunately, your dearest friend plagues your mind just so. riki’s return from oxford approaches with the same swiftness as your debut. you dread the idea of no longer having the liberty to write to him or paint him when he’s a willing muse, as it would be improper to do so while promised to another. for that reason you have yet to write to him since your last letter a week ago, where in it you bid him the gentlest farewell you could to help ease the ache in your heart.

you aren’t sure if he even received it, as he has not written back, but you suppose it’s for the best.

at least you believe that until he’s before you with unkempt hair and a haunted look in his tormented gaze. 

“tell me it is not true.” he says, chest rising and falling as if he had run from oxford to mayfair on foot, though perhaps he had been traveling by carriage since he received the letter clutched between his fingers. “tell me you are not marrying that man.”

you are unsure of how to respond, your lips parting hut no words leaving them. you turn toward your ladies maid, who blinks wildly as she receives the message, placing your hairpin down and hastening out of the room past the viscount’s son. the door clicks and yet his gaze remains unyielding, you finally speak, “you are back early, mr nishimura.”

riki had always been exceedingly easy to read, only to you, he used to pout. this moment is no different, and you can see how hard it is for him to wrap his head around his title leaving your lips instead of his name, but he recovers enough to repeat himself, “tell me.”

you place a hand on your stomach, squeezed by a corset that you suspect is why you can’t seem to catch your breath, “i will not lie to you.”

his brows furrow, his teeth peeking from his plump lips as they part in disgust and frustration, “he is old.”

“yes, i am aware of lord mortimer’s age.” you say with a similar frustration on your tongue that is heavily withheld by your propriety, “my mother saw it pertinent i educate myself before our marriage.”

“you cannot marry him.” riki says, and the frustration in your blood blooms into something more, something worse.

“that is not your decision to make.” you state, mindlessly flattening invisible wrinkles in your dress as he takes a step closer, only for you to fortify the distance with one of your own in the same direction, “not any more than it is mine.”

“you…” he loses his words as his hand clenches and releases at his side like he longs to reach for you, “you do not want this.”

“what i want does not matter to my parents anymore than it should to you,” you state, attempting to tuck the loose strand of hair that your ladies maid hadn’t the time to fit into your updo behind your ear, only for it to fall right back into place against your cheekbone, “lord mortimer is wealthy, he will give me a comfortable life.”

“do you not deserve a happy one?” riki asks, and you feel the cracks in your chest widen. instinctively, you fight the tremble of your chin and the tug in your brow as tears attempt to fit through the open crevice of your act.

“no, don’t—“ you shake your eyes, turning away from him as your arms drop to your sides, “don’t do that. i have accepted my future, i do not need you planting doubts in my mind.”

“what use would planting them do when i can see they’ve already taken root far before i arrived here?” you overlook the step he takes, nor how large his stride is. he only takes one yet it makes all the difference, as he feels infinitely closer than before. just as you feared he would.

“stop it.” you say, masked inside a heavy exhale, yet a plea all the same. “you should be visiting with your sisters, i’m sure they missed you dearly—“

“don’t marry him.” he says, and you finally look at him.

“what?” you ask despite knowing exactly what he said, you want to hear him say it again to make sure it wasn’t in your head.

he shakes his head, taking another step closer, “don’t marry him.”

“you…” he doesn't have to explain what he means, your childish hopes of love that you’d hidden so deep in your conscience do so for him. your heart sings as his eyes flick between your own and then down the bridge of your nose and lower, but your mind refuses to bend as your heart does. you shake your head, shuffling back to salvage whatever distance you can, “no.”

“yes.” he responds in kind, dropping the letter and closing the distance between the two of you to grab your hands. his next words are paired with the act of him flattening your palm against his chest, keeping it there while he grasps the other in his much larger hand, “you can’t marry him.”

“you are being cruel.” you try to pull away, but his grip is firm and you know that if you meet his gaze you won’t be able to fight it anymore.

there’s a sickening silence as his thumb draws shapes on the back of your hand, you can feel his heartbeat. it’s strong, and its pace only feeds your own heart wanton promises of devotion you had only ever been told were too rare to expect in your lifetime, “tell me you do not want me.”

the suddenness of his demand lowers your guard for just long enough for your heart to find the upper ground and force your eyes into his sights, he repeats himself, “tell me you do not want me and i will leave you to marry lord mortimer.” his words are punctuated by the hand not holding yours to his heart grasping the side of your jaw, his thumb moving against your warmed cheek, “tell me and i will never speak to you again, just as you requested in your letter. you will never have to see me and i won’t—“

“i don’t want that.” the words leave your lips without warning, but it’s too late to take them back by the time they reach his ears. you shake your head, “i don’t—i don’t want to marry, i want to paint and read and—“

he listens as your supposed acceptance crumbles beneath his gaze, chest heaving under your palm. “—i want to do all of those things with you, i do. the baron has my parents under his wretched thumb and i cannot bear it, i cannot—“ a sharp inhale rakes your body, a mix of a sob and a desperate but fruitless attempt to regain composure, “i don’t want you to go away, i want you to stay here with me and—“

his lips meet yours with a firmness that sets your heart aflame, and when he pulls away just enough to look at you your heart finally lands the finishing blow in its fight against your mind. your hand lingers on his chest as the one he uses to keep it there moves to mirror its counterpart on the other side of your jaw.

you barely glance down at his lips before they’re on yours again, a welcome experience that you hope you can experience over and over until you’re utterly familiar, but now you're not sure how to reciprocate. the novels you’ve read did little to educate you on the experience, much less prepare you for it to occur with the boy you’d found yourself longing for through the years. 

the gasp you let out when his hand moves from your jaw to your waist to tug you closer is silenced by his lips attaching themselves to yours like he’d spent a lifetime wishing to taste you.

he pulls away, yet he doesn't seem keen on keeping the distance, his nose brushing yours as he promises, “i will speak to your parents—”

the mention of them has your guts turning painfully enough to rip you away from him, nausea hitting you like a bullet through your throat, “i should not have done that.”

“i kissed you—“ his statement does little to quell your sickness, and the wavering grate in your voice as you interrupt him is telling of that. “that changes nothing.” your fingers move to your hair, the pin keeping it in place falling to the floor as you tug, “i am ruined. forget marrying the baron, i cannot marry anyone.”

“was i not clear?” he asks, and when you look at him with frustrated reluctance he continues, “should i gut myself? place my heart in your hands to have you understand how you haunt me?”

“we cannot marry.” you say, bottom lip trembling, “i will not be a consequence of your actions. it is not your duty to marry me when i am the only one ruined.”

riki’s jaw shifts as if your words brought him only fury, “i do not care for duty, i care for you.” 

“you are young, riki. you are not expected to marry for at least—“

“i want to.” he states firmly, “you said you wanted me to stay, so i am staying. i will dance with you at balls. i will send flowers and call on you every morning. i will promenade alongside you for as long as it takes. i…”

he moves towards you, thumbs brushing away the tears under your eyes as his forehead meets yours, “i am yours, do with me what you will.”

©heedeungism : do not rewrite, copy, repost, or translate any of my works without my permission.

HIDDEN LOVE ⋆𐙚 lhs

꒰ SUMMARY ! ꒱ to others, he was lee heeseung: musical prodigy, star of the basketball team, and golden boy of his college. to you, he was hee: your brother’s best friend, your safe place, and your first and final love.

pairing brother’s bsf!heeseung x fem!reader (ft. brother!jay) warning mention of violence, assault, profanity, blood and injury, not proofread word count 9.2k notes happy bday @bluriki! love u rora bb & hope you like my gift! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

THE FIRST TIME YOU MET LEE HEESEUNG, he was nineteen and you were seventeen.

School bag in hand and sweat on your forehead, you sighed in content as the coolness of the air conditioned home kissed your flushed skin. The summer heat was unforgiving, so no one could blame you when you rushed towards the freezer, throwing the door open in search of the precious stash of mango popsicles you saved for yourself as treats for enduring another tedious day at school. The last thing you expected was to find that there was none left.

In disbelief, you rummaged through the drawers, wondering if you misplaced them. But it soon came clear to you that this wasn’t an error on your part. There was no one else in this household who had the same appetite for ice cream as you did — and this time, you just knew he was to blame.

You slammed the door of the freezer shut, your mind made up as you stomped over to your brother’s room. Since he came home from college for summer break, he had been invading every bit of territory that you claimed as your own upon his departure from home. You didn’t even need to question when he had the opportunity to steal your precious ice cream. The evidence was all against him. So you didn’t hesitate to enact justice when you saw him.

“Hey!” you yelled at the top of your lungs. You twisted open his bedroom door, throwing it open with all the annoyance you could summon. “Park Jeongseong, you—!”

You froze mid sentence, eyes comically wide as they stared at the sight before you — one that wasn’t your brother. A person who could only be a character of a manhwa who had come to life. Had you been idealised without even realising? Because the stranger in front of you was far too pretty to be real.

Sitting in the halo of the sunlight that filtered through your brother’s window, the person before you cradled a guitar over his lap, slender fingers pausing in the middle of a gentle strum. Doe-like eyes met yours, giving him the appearance of a deer caught in the headlights. Still, with the framing of his soft hair against his forehead and the soft angles around his face, he didn’t look any less handsome in his surprised state. With his casual baggy t-shirt and jeans, he looked like the typical flower male leads of high school romance dramas.

“…Bastard…”

You swallowed thickly, eyes blinking rapidly at the unwilling words which left your mouth. The handsome stranger raised a perfect brow at the sudden name-call, and you felt your face flush. Somehow, even such a simple action seemed attractive when he did it.

“Sorry, not you!” you amended immediately. “I was just—!” You were about to explain yourself like a burglar who was caught in the middle of a heist, only to realise that wasn’t right at all: pretty or not, the person in front of you was a total stranger inside your home, in your brother’s room. You crossed your arms over your chest, standing your ground against the curious gaze of the intruder. “Wait a second— who are you? And why are you in my house?”

The intruder looked at you. You looked back. Then after a few seconds, he laughed. In your confusion, you failed to notice your older brother creep up behind you with an unimpressed look. “What are you doing in my room? I told you not to go in without knocking.”

You turned around to meet your older brother’s questioning gaze. By now, you had completely forgotten about the ice cream, instead focusing on the new mystery in front of you. “But!” You pointed to the stranger on your brother’s bed like a child pointing out a stray puppy to their mother. “There’s a random guy in your room!”

Jeongseong — or rather, “Jay,” as he liked to be called — followed the direction of your pointed finger, his gaze landed on the boy on his bed. Your brother let out a sigh. Like an adult dealing with a troublesome child, he looked down at you with a flat look. “That ‘random guy’,” Jay said, “is my best friend from college.”

Your eyes widened comically, a small ‘o’ forming on your lips. “You have friends?”

There was silence. Then, the emptiness was filled with the sound of rich laughter, and you felt your cheeks heat up at the warmth of the sound, your head turning to look at the source. Your brother’s so-called ‘best friend’ was smiling at you, his eyes dancing with mirth. Your brother rolled his eyes from behind you, unaware of the infatuated look in your eyes as you took in the sight before you.

“Heeseung, meet my little sister, [_____].” Jeongseong’s rough palm landed on the top of your head, forcing it down into a polite nod, and breaking your trance with the older male in front of you. You furrowed your brows and shook off the weight of his heavy hand, lifting your head to meet the eyes of this ‘Heeseung.’ “[_____], say hi.”

You timidly bowed your head, fidgeting slight under the amused gaze of the handsome boy in front of you.

He nodded at you, a soft smile on his face. “Nice to meet you, Little Park,” he said, his voice full of the gentleness one might have when speaking to a baby kitten. You could have sworn your heart skipped a beat. “I hope you don’t mind me hanging out in your home.”

You blinked, too startstruck to do anything else. And from that moment on, your world was never the same.

THE FIRST TIME YOU REALISED YOU MIGHT HAVE A LITTLE CRUSH ON LEE HEESEUNG, it was only a few days after meeting him.

Ever since you met Heeseung, he had been around the house more often, seeing as he had won over your parents as easily as he seemingly won over you — with his charms and smile, the couple instantly invited Heeseung to hang over at your home more often. And surprisingly enough, the boy instantly agreed.

You had always been shy around strangers. But at your age, within the walls of your school, someone as handsome as Lee Heeseung was rarer than a Shiny Pokémon. And while your own brother was considered good-looking by many people, including your friends, you had grown immune to his face from years of exposure to it and because of many embarrassing childhood memories of him attached to it. To you, Lee Heeseung was from a whole different world from your own. And that was why you couldn’t help but treat him differently than you did other boys you met.

You were skittish around him, avoiding him like a cat would water. You made sure you weren’t alone with him for too long out of fear that you might embarrass yourself with your awkwardness. On the other hand, he had always been the one to give you warm smiles out of kindness, greeting you whenever you somehow crossed paths. And you had to admit that it made you feel warm inside. But at the same time, having him around your house constantly was a little unnerving. Especially when he witnessed all the little moments that happened in your own home — even those you wished he wouldn’t have witnessed at all.

You had a test coming up for one of your classes which you had been struggling with, and in a last ditch effort to save your failing grade, you enlisted the help of your much more academically gifted older brother. You were sitting on the floor of your living room, your books and stationary scattered across the small coffee table, while your brother sat on the couch behind you, arms crossed over his chest and a ruler in his left hand, painting the image of an old-school teacher with Spartan teaching methods.

“Okay, so which formula do you use to solve this?”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you stared at the paper in front of you, trying to mentally flip through all the pages of formulas you had tried to cram in your head under your brother’s expectant gaze. You frowned when you could only remember the first few parts, completely unable to decipher the rest from the random jumble of letters and numbers that your brain came up with to fill your gaps in knowledge.

“Ouch!” You yelped when you suddenly felt the familiar feeling of the end of Jeongseong’s ruler lightly knocking your skull. You raised your hands defensively to plant on top of your head. Pouting, you turned around to glare at your brother. “What was that for?”

“I was giving your braincells a manual reboot,” he said plainly. “How hard is this? I already told you so many times how to do it.”

You huffed, your pride wounded as Jeongseong chided you. It would be fine if it was only you and your parents in the home to witness your lack of mental capacity for math. But as it happened, your brother’s best friend was pouring himself a drink in the kitchen, and happened to witness everything with front row seats.

“Seriously, how are you this dumb?” Jeongseong asked.

You drowned in embarrassment as you felt Heeseung’s eyes on the two of you. Even if he was your brother’s best friend, he was still essentially a stranger to you, and it was always more humiliating to be humbled in front of people you didn’t know. So for your brother to call you ‘dumb’ in front of him, you couldn’t help but feel wronged.

You glared at your bother. “You don’t have to be such a jerk about it,” you hissed under your breath, your hands balling into fists at your side. “I’m trying my best.”

Before Jay could ask what was wrong with you, you quickly stood from your seat, your hair falling over your eyes as they remained glued to the floor. And without another word, you stormed to your room. You slammed the door shut, ignoring the protests from your older brother. Flopping onto your bed, you buried your face into one of the plushies, your limbs laying limp by your side.

You thought about the way you left the scene and groaned. Now you probably looked weird and stupid at the same time. You reached over to your bedside subconsciously, and groaned again when you realised you hadn’t even brought your phone with you. Your laptop was still in the living room, as well, so you couldn’t carry out your plans to waste the day away in your room like you had planned.

Great. Just great.

Seems like you would just have to force yourself to take a nap instead. Closing your eyes, you willed yourself to fall asleep. But a knock at your door had them snapping open once more. Was it Jeongseong? What did he want right now?

Groaning, you dragged yourself off the bed. At the door, you readied yourself to give the meanest glare that you could possibly give, in case he tried to give you a hard time because of your attitude. But when you opened the door, you were surprised to find someone who wasn’t your brother.

“Hey, Little Park,” Heeseung greeted. Your eyes widened, and you felt your breath be caught inside your chest. Because why was Lee Heeseung currently in front of your room? “Sorry to bother you, I just came to bring these for you.”

Your eyes flitted down to the tray inside Heeseung’s hands that you didn’t notice upon seeing his face. It had a glass of juice on it, as well as a plate of fruit that he had cut. “This is for me?” you asked in surprise. “What’s it for?”

Heeseung chuckled warmly at your reaction. “Your brother asked me to bring it for you, since he knew you probably didn’t want to come out into the kitchen after…”

You lowered your head in shame at the reminder of how you suddenly stormed out the living room. “Please forget that happened… It’s embarassing.”

“Don’t be embarrassed,” Heeseung said gently. “Your brother did a lot more embarassing things in front of me. His mood swings were the worst during puberty.”

You laughed as you recalled memories of your older brother when he was fourteen. He had a bit of a temper, and got angered at the slightest inconveniences. One of his infamous grievances — or so you heard from your parents, when they came back from a parent-teacher interview for your brother — was when he gathered all the members of his football team in the locker rooms and gave them all a dressing-down for leaving their dirty towels scattered across the changing rooms.

Seeing your smile, Heeseung returned it with one of his own. He held out the tray in his hands, and you took it gratefully into your smaller ones, your fingers brushing slightly from the contact. You expected him to let go straight away, but to your surprise, he kept his hands there. You looked up at him questioningly.

“I know you probably wouldn’t want to hear this right now,” he said, “but your brother really cares for you.” He gestured to the fruit on the plate. “I know for a fact that whenever me and my older brother argued, he would never think to feed me afterwards.”

You lowered your head at Heeseung’s words. You knew this very well, in fact. Your brother was the person who cared about your most on this world, aside from your parents. Your mother often told the tales of how your brother had refused to leave your side when you were younger, insisting on sleeping in your room with you in case you got lonely. And then when your parents woke up to check on you when you started crying in the middle of the night, by the time they made it to the room, your brother was already by your side, gently patting you back to sleep.

Even when the two of you bickered, you knew you were fortunate to have a brother like Jeongseong.

“I know,” you told Heeseung, your head lowered.

Heeseung chuckled. And a second later, you found yourself freezing when you felt his palm on the top of your head. “Hey,” he said, meeting your surprised gaze with a smile. “Don’t feel bad.” He gave your head a gentle pat, chuckling awkwardly when you seemed even more confused. “Sorry. I don’t know why I did that.”

The two of you laughed together, and the earlier gloom above your head was chased away by the brightness of his smile.

“I should probably go back to study,” you said, suddenly feeling invigorated.

Heeseung hummed. “How about I help you?” Upon seeing your surprised expression, he smiled warmly. “I have the free time, and your brother is still moping in his room. So we can go over some of the things you’re struggling with.”

You eagerly accepted the older boy’s offer, and the two of you sat down at the coffee table, knees brushing against each other, and your heads bumping slightly as you hunched over your school work.

You looked up at one point, after a particularly problematic equation, discretely watching Heeseung as he scanned your working. At this angle, you could admire the length of his eyelashes and the perfect outline of his side profile, and the way his chocolate brown irises appeared like caramel in the lighting. You almost flinched when those eyes of his met yours. And then he smiled at you, his hand reaching up to the top of your head once more.

“Good job, Little Park,” he said warmly. And you couldn’t help but beam under his praise. “You should take a break, though. It’s been a while.”

You didn’t refuse. After all, you would much rather not do any more equations. You worried it may be awkward between you and Heeseung, though, seeing as you’ve never had a proper conversation before today. But soon, the living room was filled with your voices as you discussed topic after topic.

“So you have an older brother, right?” you asked, remembering how he mentioned it earlier. “Do you get along?”

Heeseung hummed, and you couldn’t help but note the smooth but low register of his voice when he was relaxed. “We get along like all brothers do — but I’d say you and Jay seem to be closer than we are.” Heeseung smiled as he observed your facial features. “You’re really similar, too. Me and my brother never had a lot of shared interests.”

You tilted your head curiously. “How so?”

Heeseung leaned back onto the sofa behind the two of you, looking up at the ceiling, and giving you a nice view of his Adam’s Apple. “He was always more studious. Top student and everything. I liked music and basketball better — and apparently I’m pretty good at it.”

“Really? That’s cool!” Music and basketball was an interesting combination. But It made sense, too, considering Heeseung’s physique: Heeseung was much taller than average, and even your brother was quite a bit shorter than him; his fingers were long and slender as well, and probably skilful with the piano — though you, of course, wouldn’t say that out loud. “So you’re good at basketball? I can see it,” you said, nodding sagely. “You have the height for it.”

Heeseung chuckled. “I think I’ve heard that one before.”

The more you spoke to Heeseung, the easier for you to let down your guard. While your first impression was someone out of reach, you realised he was actually very comfortable to be around. “By the way,” you said, looking up at Heeseung, “do you have a girlfriend?”

Heeseung blinked, obviously surprised. “Why do you ask?”

“I mean…” You shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant. You couldn’t let him know you wanted to see if he was available — especially since you only just met. “Most guys your age have girlfriends, right?”

“Your brother doesn’t, though,” Heeseung pointed out.

You nodded. “Well, that’s because my brother is terrible at flirting with girls. So it makes sense.”

Heeseung raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “So what about me, then?” The corner of his lips tugged into a smirk. “If you think I have a girlfriend, are you saying I’m good at flirting?”

You blinked, not expecting that sort of question to come from him. You awkwardly avoided his eyes, humming uncertainty. “Well… I mean— you probably wouldn’t be bad at it… Right?”

Heeseung paused. Then, he laughed, the sound so full and resonant it caused your heart to beat wildly in return. “Well, I’m flattered,” he said while looking at you with amusement. He leaned towards you, his voice and smirk holding a teasing lilt. “But just so you know — I’m single.”

You didn’t realise it then, but that fluttering feeling inside your chest when you made eye contact was the beginning of your first and only love.

THE FIRST TIME YOU REALISED THAT LEE HEESEUNG REALLY CARED ABOUT YOU, he was twenty and you were eighteen.

A year had passed since you met Lee Heeseung in your brother’s room, and since then, you could say that — whenever he was on break from college — the older boy had become something of a constant in your life from there on. Every day, when you came home from school, he would be there with a cup of juice for you to fend off the heat. And when winter came, the juice would be replaced with hot chocolate. And one the first day you saw each other during his seasonal breaks, he would have a gift for you.

The first time it happened, you hadn’t been suspecting it. But as soon as Heeseung laid eyes on you when he walked through the front door of your house, he had immediately gestured you over to him. You, being the lovesick puppy you were, immediately bounded up to him. And your eyes lit up when he held out his hand with a keychain of your favourite Sanrio character.

“Here,” he said to you, in that same gentle tone he always did. “I got this for you. I saw it at a gift store and thought you would like it.”

Jeongseong gave him an ugly look. “Where’s my present?”

Heeseung walked past him. “It’s me.”

Your brother, having his delicate feelings offended, immediately pounced on his friend in retaliation. Their laughter bounced off the walls of your home. And as the two tall males brawled playfully in front of the entrance to your home, you simply stared at the keychain in your hand with a smile, before clutching it close to your heart.

It had become routine, and it had gotten to the point where you had been used to his presence. So, whenever your brother was home, but you didn’t see Heeseung’s face, you pestered Jeongseong about it.

“Where’s Hee?” you asked one day, as you returned home from school, only to find the familiar head of ashy silver hair was no where to be seen.

Your brother gave you a narrow stare, and you briefly wondered if he had caught onto your little puppy crush on his best friend, and had consequently chased Heeseung out of his home in his typical overprotective fashion. But instead, he turned back to his show on the television, brushing your question off with a dismissive explanation.

“He’s busy,” Jeongseong said.

You frowned at the news.

“Did you ask about if he was coming to my graduation?” you asked your brother. It was your final year in high school, and in a week’s time, you would be graduating. Since Heeseung had grown close to your family, you thought that perhaps he might come. But your brother nipped that thought in the bud.

Jeongseong turned around and gave you a strange look. “Why would he?”

You paused. That was a good question: why would Lee Heeseung attend your graduation? Even if it was a milestone in your life, were the two of you really close enough that he needed to be there to share it?

“Ah,” you said, disappointed. “Never mind…”

You knew it was foolish of you to be upset about this. After all, he didn’t have an obligation to be there. The two of you wouldn’t even know each other if it weren’t for your older brother. It was childish of you to assume he would be there, as if you really meant anything to him — as if you weren’t just someone he treated well for the sake of being related to a good friend of his.

Besides, he was busy. What right did you have to demand his time?

You dragged your feet as you went towards you room, phantom puppy ears flattening against your head. As if sensing the sulking aura from you, Jeongseong let out a heavy sigh and said, “Bring your phone.”

Your head whipped towards your brother in shock. “What?”

“If you want to ask him to go to your graduation, then you ask him yourself.” Jeongseong looked at over form over the couch, holding his hand out to you. “I’ll give you his number.”

You rushed to hand your phone over to your brother like he had offered you a pot of gold. You weren’t sure why your brother was offering you his best friend’s number, but you didn’t question it. Heeseung was the only friend of his he ever allowed near his home — so it went to show that your brother didn’t mind if he was around you. You just had to make sure you weren’t obvious. So after Jeongseong had typed Heeseung’s number, you feigned calmness as you thanked him and went to your room.

But the second you closed the door behind you, you jumped onto your bed while kicking your feet giddily. After saving his contact under your nickname for me — accompanied by a hamster emoji — you quickly sent a text his way, letting him know that your brother gave him your number. It didn’t take long before you received a reply.

Hee 🐹: thanks for letting me know

Hee 🐹: i’ll save your number

You smiled as you sent another text.

You: sorry to bother you btw

You: i just wanted to ask if you were free next friday

Hee 🐹: next friday??

Hee 🐹: sorry little park but i’m busy on that day

Hee 🐹: why do you ask?

You frowned at the reply. Of course. Your brother had told you he was busy, so you shouldn’t have been disappointed. But a small part of you — the naive part — was hoping that, by some twist of fate, he would be free to celebrate what was a special day in your life. Biting your lip, you sent back a solemn reply.

You: no, it’s nothing

You: just asking

You quickly changed the topic, not wanting to alarm the boy. Knowing him, he would feel guilty if he knew he was missing out on your graduation: he was just kind like that. Always wanting to be there for everyone, always wanting to make everyone happy. You supposed it was selfish to want to keep him to yourself.

You: are you okay?

You genuinely didn’t want him to be overworking himself, so you had to make sure.

Hee 🐹: i’m fine don’t worry about me

Hee 🐹: i’ve been working at a music store lately to earn some money

You tilted your head. You knew Heeseung was talented when it came to music, but you didn’t know he worked at a music store. His parents were well off much like yours and Jeongseong’s, so he didn’t need to worry about funds — just like you and Jeongseong were told by your parents to simply focus on studying rather than getting jobs before you graduated. But it was admirable seeing Heeseung be independent, regardless.

Smiling, you sent back a text of your own.

You: oooh i didn’t know that you had a job!

You: congrats! 🥳

You: hope i’m not bothering you

Your heart skipped a beat at the next text.

Hee 🐹: you could never be a bother to me

You didn’t realise how much Heeseung meant that until a week later, after you had walked off the stage with your graduation certificate.

Your cheeks had hurt from smiling so much, your graduation certificate held carefully in your arms. Being able to celebrate it with your family and school friends you spent years with made the lack of Heeseung’s presence feel a little less empty. So you, were content with what you had, and didn’t dare ask for more.

After taking photos with your friends, you stuck by your family the entire time, until your brother had excused himself for a second to answer a call.

“Hey, are you here yet?” Jeongseong asked on the phone, making his way away from you and your parents. You didn’t pay attention to what he might be saying, too focused on posing for more pictures as a photographer your parents hired snapped away on their camera.

Time passed since your brother had left, and you didn’t know when he came back, but when he ran back towards you and your parents, he promptly apologised by saying, “I had to go pick something up.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Pick up what?”

A tap on your shoulder caught you off guard, and you whipped your head around to face the perpetrator. You hadn’t expected to come face to face with the person you had been missing tonight. You gasped and broke away from Heeseung in shock, a hand flying to your mouth. He simply chuckled at your expression, eyes crinkling and sparkling with mirth. “Happy graduation, Little Park.”

“Hee!” you exclaimed excitedly, and you jumped on him, almost tackling him to the ground. You giggled with glee as he returned your embrace, his arms wrapping around you gently, and a hand coming up to the back of your head, cradling it to his chest. Your parents chuckled on the background, and your brother sighed. You pulled back, eyes full of wonder as you looked up at your crush. “But didn’t you say you were busy? I mean, you had work, right?”

Heeseung smiled. “I couldn’t miss your graduation, could I?” He then pouted at you. “I’m a bit disappointed that you didn’t mention it, though.” You sheepishly lowered your head, and he chuckled before patting your head. “Don’t worry. That’s what your brother is for. If there’s one thing he’s good at, it’s telling people all about your business.”

“Hey!” Jeongseong protested at having been exposed for his habit of bringing you up any chance he got. You blinked in surprise, not expecting that side of him. But as if he didn’t like the way your attention drifted from him, Heeseung cleared his throat.

You immediately looked at him. And then, as if he didn’t surprise you enough already, he suddenly pulled a bouquet out from behind his back — one that had to be bigger than the size of your head, but which happened to have all your favourite flowers.

All of a sudden, you remembered a conversation the two of you had, a few days ago on the phone.

“Can you help me with something?” Heeseung asked on the phone. You, of course, eagerly agreed, and he explained his situation. “I want to buy my brother’s girlfriend some flowers to welcome her into the family, but I don’t know which ones a girl would like. Can you give me some ideas?”

You “ooh”ed in understanding, racking your brain for some common flowers. Secretly, your heart fluttered at the thought that — of all people, and of all the girls he most likely knew — you were the first person Heeseung came to for help. You definitely didn’t want to mess this up.

“It depends, though. Everyone is different,” you replied.

There was a slight pause on the other side of the line, and you were scared that you had disappointed Heeseung. But instead, he simply hummed, and made an ‘ah’ sound out of realisation. “Then why don’t you tell me what flowers you like?” he suggested. “If I got you a bouquet, what would you want in it?”

You scolded yourself for immediately picturing Heeseung in a suit, holding a bouquet of your favourite flowers as he gave you that same warm smile that he always did. Shaking your head, you immediately started to name the ones that you preferred.

You didn’t think the information you gave him would end up being used like this. With a wide grin, you accepted the flowers, your eyes sparkling like the night sky as you looked at the boy in front of you — not in a suit, like you had imagined, but handsome all the same. He always was, after all.

“Thank you, Hee,” you said, full of genuine gratitude.

He smiled at you. “Anything for you,” he said.

And now, you knew he meant it.

THE FIRST TIME YOU SAW LEE HEESEUNG ANGRY, you didn’t even know he was capable of it.

You had always been used to a warm Heeseung. The Heeseung who teased you with smirks, and simultaneously doted on you with kind smiles. But you didn’t realise that he had a side to him that was fierce, just as he was gentle. That even his blood was capable of boiling if someone pushed him far enough.

Having graduated from high school, and awaiting news from college applications, you spent your free time working part-time at a local convenience store, which happened to be fairly close to the music store Heeseung worked at. You worked day shifts, so you never worried for your safety. But one particular day, you got unlucky.

“How’s work going?” Heeseung had asked through your AirPods. He was on break, while you were simply waiting for customers to show up. At this time, you guys usually had phone calls to pass the time, and you would stack shelves with your earphones in, listening to Heeseung’s voice as he talked about his day and you told him about yours. It was one of the things you liked most about working at the convenience store — apart from the endless supply of nearly expired snacks you were allowed to eat for free.

“It’s going okay,” you replied. “Really empty, though.”

You weren’t surprised. Since it was winter, most people opted to stay inside to keep away from the cold. At most, you would have the nine-to-five workers who popped in from the office buildings across the convenience store during lunch hours. But it was already going on to four in the afternoon, so the buzz had already long died down by now.

At that moment, the door opened to signal the arrival of another customer. “Welcome,” you greeted politely, going over to the counter to get out of the way and wait for the customer to make a purchase. Heeseung didn’t say anything, allowing you to focus on your job. And it was then that you realised something was wrong.

The customer who had just walked in was stumbling over their own feet, an empty soju bottle in one hand, the other wiping his mouth after taking a swig. He was an average-looking man, middle-aged, with beady eyes and a strong stench of alcohol surrounding him. You subconsciously moved closer to the emergency button when he stumbled into one of the shelves, cursing loudly when a bunch of items fell to the floor with a clatter.

Heeseung, of course, had heard this, and instantly questioned you.

“Little Park,” he said, his voice uncharacteristically tense. “What was that?”

You blinked, watching as the customer aggressively ripped a few soju bottles from the fridge, causing others to fall on the floor. The sound of shattering glass immediately followed, and you flinched. “Sir,” you called out shakily, scared that you might set him off. “If you break items, you have to pay for it.”

“Fucking hell, just shut up already!” You flinched at the customer’s raised voice. You thought you were overreacting, so you didn’t alarm Heeseung when his voice once again rang in your ear.

“I’m being serious right now,” Heeseung said. “Are you okay?”No, went unsaid. But you didn’t need to say it, because there was already a loud shuffling on the other side of the line, followed by the sound of a door being swung open. Heeseung didn’t even let you protest as you heard the sound of him running down the concrete pathway. “I’m on my way, just stay on call.”

“Huh?” You glanced at the time on your watch. His break would finish in five minutes, he really didn’t have time to be running out on your account. “But your break—!”

“Hey.” You froze upon being addressed by the man, who had suddenly appeared in front of you. And even if there was a protective screen in front of you, you couldn’t help but feel threatening as he glared at you, aggressively placing his bottles on the counter. “Who are you talking to?”

You furrowed your brows. Why was it any of his business? “Are these all you’re buying?” You asked, ignoring his question and gesturing the the alcohol bottle. You then looked at the mess he made near the fridge. Since you weren’t going to risk stepping outside the booth, where he would be able to reach you, you did your best to assess the damage from where you stood. “I see three broken bottles, so that will be added to your total.”

You reached out cautiously to grab the bottles on the counter for scanning, wanting him out of the store as soon as possible. But just as you tried to grab them, you let out a scream when the man suddenly grabbed your arm, holding your wrist like a viper trying to cut off circulation.

“You little bitch!” he cursed. “You tried calling the police, didn’t you? Just like that woman!”

“Help!” You ignored the man’s rambling. But that seemed to only make things worse. He lunged at the screen between the two of you, nails reaching for your face. You let out another scream, your eyes stinging with tears as you tried in vain to free your hand. You somehow had the sense to press the merges services button under the counter, but who knew when they would get here. “Help! Is anyone there?!”

At that moment, as if the world had answered your prayers, the door to the convince store opened. And there stood Heeseung, chest heaving, his phone clutched in his hand. Upon seeing the sight in front of him, his eyes flashed with rage beyond words, his phone falling to the floor as he marched up to the man holding your wrist captive.

He grabbed the back of his collar before ripping his form away from the counter with strength you didn’t he possessed. You watched with wide eyes as Heeseung threw him to the ground, straddling him before throwing an unforgiving fist to the man’s face. The sound of flesh and cracking bones rang out as Heeseung levelled the man relentlessly in silent rampage, not once letting a single curse slip.

You watched as Heeseung’s knuckles became bloodied, busted and bruised. And seeing him like that, you finally snapped out of your frightened daze.

“Hee!” You yelled, scrambling from behind the counter. As if you placed a spell on him, Heeseung immediately stopped, his fist pausing mid-punch. You immediately wrapped your arms around his torso, tears flooding your vision as you squeezed him as tightly as you could. “Hee, stop!”

You didn’t care for the man who tried to attack you. But you could never forgive yourself if Heeseung got into trouble because of you.

“I’m okay,” you assured him. “I’m okay…”

Heeseung let his fist fall to his side, and he sighed as he looked at the unconscious man beneath him, whose face was beaten beyond recognition. By the time the police arrived at the scene, the only thing they found was the man on the floor of the convenience store, while you and Heeseung stood to the side, the latter hold you in his arms as he stroked your head and whispered gentle words into your ears.

“It’s okay,” he said, his lips against the shell of your ear as your body trembled from the shock of the events that just unfolded. He closed his eyes, burying his nose into your hair while you sobbed into his shoulder. “I won’t let anyone hurt you…”

That day, you realised just how unforgiving Heesung was. And yet, as he held you in his arms, you felt nothing but comfort. Even then — especially then — he was warm, gentle. He was safe.

“That bastard got lucky,” Jeongseong said as he picked you and Heeseung up front the police station, where you were required to give your own statements of what happened. Your older brother gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles went white. As soon as he heard the news of what happened, he was ready to send the person responsible for the bruise on your wrist to an early grave. And if it weren’t for the police present, holding him back when he stormed into the station, you were sure he would have. “If Heeseung hadn’t gotten to him first… I would have seriously killed him.”

Heeseung reached over from the backseat to pat your head as you zoned out in the passenger seat. You rubbed your arms for warmth, and the scent of Heeseung’s hoodie on your figure caused you to drift off to sleep while your brother ranted his frustration in the driver’s seat beside you.

And you just prayed for anyone else who ever raised a hand against you in the future. Because you knew you weren’t leaving Heeseung’s side any time soon.

THE FIRST TIME YOU KISSED LEE HEESEUNG, it was just a few months later.

It was your first day of college, and you had been nervous as you moved into your new accommodation on campus. Your parents were even more so, and you had a tearful goodbye. But as soon as they left, your brother and Heeseung — who coincidentally went to the same institution that you would now attend — stayed behind to help you move your furniture in.

“That’s all of it,” Heeseung said as he dusted off his hands. He smiled at you, before wiping sweat from his forehead. And you shamelessly watched the way his skin shone under the sunlight filtering through your window. “You’re good to go, Little Park.”

You smiled. Although he didn’t seem too different, you could tell you had somehow gotten closer to him after the convenience store incident. And ever since then, his presence had always been a source of security for you. You didn’t worry when he was around.

“Remember what I said, okay?” Jay asked. He was in typical overprotective brother mode as he lectured you on what you could or couldn’t do, and it gave you flashbacks to your first day of middle schools, where he had threatened off a little boy for gifting you a flower. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be getting into any fights this time around — but who knew? He had an unpredictable temper at times. “Be careful of boys!” Jeongseong warned passionately. “You can’t trust any of them, no matter how nice they look?”

You raised a brow. “But what about you and Hee?”

Jeongseong waved a dismissive hand. “Obviously, I’m your brother, so I don’t count. And Hee basically sees you as his little sister with how long he’s known you, so he doesn’t count, either.”

You froze. And all of a sudden, it was like a cloud of doom gathered over your head, threatening to drench you in your own self-pity. You would be lying if you said you didn’t have the fattest crush on him — and you had been trying to delude yourself into thinking he might feel the same one day.

But when Jeongseong raised a point, it was often a very good one. Heeseung had essentially spent two years in and out of your home, making it a second home of his own, and was as close as brothers with Jeongseong. He was a ‘safe’ man in Jeongseong’s eyes — because the way your brother saw it, there was no way Heeseung could hold any romantic feelings for you.

And you hated to admit that he might be right.

You glanced hesitantly over at Heeseung to find that he had a clenched jaw, his posture tense as he stared straight forward. You bit your lip, lowering your head. Now that you thought about it… Everything he did for you— was that just an act of brotherly affection? Did he really not see you as anything else?

“Anyway, we should head off,” Jeongseong said. “Have fun, and don’t forget to call if you need anything!”

With that, Jeongseong turned and opened your door, ready to leave. But at that moment, he noticed Heeseung was still standing where he was — unmoving. “Hey, man,” Jeongseong called out to him, “you okay there?”

You looked at him curiously, wondering the same thing. As if snapping out of a trance, Heeseung shook his head. “No. I’m fine. Let’s go.” He turned to follow Jeongseong out the door, but paused for a moment to look at you. You spared a small smile, hoping to give off some semblance of normalcy. But to your disappointment, he simply averted your gaze and turned away.

He left without looking back, leaving you wondering what you had done wrong.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” You looked at your friend, who you had met on Orientation Day, and who you hit it off with immediately. Kim Sunoo was the same age as you and coincidentally from the same degree. So, the two of you quickly stuck together like glue. “You seemed out of it since we met up.”

You quickly shook your head, not wanting to bring down the mood. Even though Sunoo knew about your feelings for Heeseung (you couldn’t resist telling him, when he seemed invested in your story), you didn’t really want to think about his strange behaviour. This was a day out for the two of you to enjoy. Remembering this, you smiled. “It’s nothing!” you assured. “Just missing home.”

Sunoo, thankfully, bought the lie (mostly because it was actually true), nodding sympathetically. “I get it. I miss my family a lot, even if it’s only been a day.” After a moment, he then made a noise like he remembered something. “By the way— if you’re not too tired, there’s a party at the dorms tonight. Some seniors that I know are holding it for us first years. Wanna come?”

Your eyes widened. “Really?” You hadn’t been invited to parties much in high school, because everyone knew you were related to Park “Overprotective” Jeongseong. Besides, your parents would have never allowed it. But now, you were slowly realising how much freedom you had as an adult. Just once, you felt like experiencing this part of your youth you never got to taste. “Sure.”

Hopefully, if nothing else, the party would be a nice distraction…

“You know Lee Heeseung?”

Or not.

Upon arriving at the venue where the supposed party was being held (which happened to be in the common rooms, meaning a relatively short walk), Sunoo had immediately dragged you over to a group of older girls, who were all either second or third years. You chatted with them awkwardly until they brought up the name all too familiar with you, fawning over his good looks. And Sunoo, who sensed the sudden spark of jealousy in your eyes, had been quick to subtly stake your claim on him.

Not that he needed to, considering Heeseung wasn’t yours…

“He’s my brother’s best friend,” you explained. Though you wished you kept your mouth shut, after seeing the glint of excitement in the senior’s eye. “Why?”

One of the other seniors grasped your hands. “Then do you think you can introduce me to him? He’s totally my type!”

You frowned.

“Oh, I forgot I was supposed to meet with some other friends,” Sunoo suddenly said. He then turned to you, grabbing your wrist out of the senior’s hands. “Come on, [_____]. They said they wanted to meet you, too.” With one last half-assed apology, Sunoo dragged you away from the seniors. He glanced at you, frowning at your vacant expression. “Sorry about them.”

You shook your head. “No. It’s okay…”

You supposed you should have seen this coming. Who wouldn’t want to be close to Lee Heeseung? It was only natural. But deep inside, you couldn’t help but wonder, if there was someone — someone like those pretty seniors you were with — who Heeseung wanted to be close to. After all, you knew he was single, but that didn’t mean his heart wasn’t taken. So who? Who was it?

“Little Park?”

You immediately froze in your tracks, causing Sunoo to pause right beside you. That nickname… Only one person ever used it. And there was no mistaking that voice. You immediately turned around, as your body was driven by some subconscious reaction to respond to him. Your eyes widened when you met gazes with Heeseung.

And he did not seem happy.

Heeseung’s eyebrows furrowed as his eyes landed on Sunoo’s hand on your wrist. His hand clenched in a fist by his side, and his jaw was clenched. He was as gorgeous as always, with his silver hair shining under the dim lighting of the common room, creating a nice contrast with the black shirt that clung to his form, moulding itself perfectly over his muscles. But the thing you noticed first was not the glare in his eyes, or his beauty.

It was the busted lip he was sporting, and the purple bruise on his cheek.

Your eyes widened, a gasp slipping past your lips. You didn’t know when Sunoo had dropped your wrist, but you didn’t care in that moment. You immediately ran to Heeseung, eyes trained on the injuries on his face. “Hee!” you gasped out, raising your hand to his face, your fingers hovering over his injury. “What happened to you? Your face…”

Heeseung looked down at you, sparing a weak smile, all his precious displeasure fading from his face. “Don’t worry.” He lifted his hand to grab your own, eyes holding the same light it always did when he spoke to you. “I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not!” You said. And it was probably the first time you ever raised your voice against him. But he simply grinned even wider, despite the pain he must feel from the cut on his lip. “Come on, we’re going to get your wound treated!” You turned around, facing Sunoo who was watching the two of you with raised eyebrows. “Sorry, but we have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

Sunoo barely got to say goodbye before you were bounding up the stairs. You pulled Heeseung behind you and he followed you like a lost puppy as you navigated your way up the stairs, towards your room at the end of the hallways. You threw the door open, making Heeseung sit on the bed as you looked around at your unpacked boxes.

“Where did I put my First Aid Kit?”

You went to reach for one of the boxes, only to be stopped by Heeseung’s hands on your own. “Hold up, Hee,” you said absently, not looking at his face. “Let me just—”

“[____].”

You froze at the sound of Heeseung’s voice calling you by name — your actual name. Not ‘Little Park’, the name that ensured he only looked at you as an extension of his friendship with your brother, but your name. Just you. You slowly turned around, wonderstruck at how the sound of your name on his tongue was both unfamiliar but right.

Heeseung smiled at you, and you thought at that moment that the look in his eyes tonight were the most beautiful things you’d ever seen. “Just stop for a moment, okay?”

Before you could say another word, Heeseung was pulling you towards him, so that you were standing between his legs. Your eyes widened, and your breath hitched in your throat. His nose brushed against yours as he looked up at you, eyelids hooded as his chocolate orbs stared into yours, looking as if he was trapped in some daze. You swallowed the lump in your throat as you looked at the bruise on your cheek.

“But your wounds,” you whispered, worry causing your lips to tug downwards in a frown, despite the way your soul sang at your proximity.

“I deserve them,” Heeseung whispered in return. “If I were Jay, I would beat me up, too.”

You froze, your blood going ice cold. “My brother did this to you?”

Your brother — Heeseung’s best friend — Jeongseong was the one responsible for the injuries on Heeseung’s face? Just what had happened in the few hours that you didn’t see the two of them? What was severe enough to warrant punches between all-but-blood brothers?

“I let him,” Heeseung said. “I said something I knew would piss him off, and gave him a free shot at me.” Heeseung laughed, as if recalling some fond memory. “He always did like bargain deals…”

You stared at Heeseung, dumbfounded. “What did you say to my brother that was bad enough to earn you this?”

Heeseung stared at you in silence. You stared back. The room was filled with a heavy tension as Heeseung’s eyes flickered down to your parted lips, his fingers curling into your waist. After what felt like an eternity, his eyes wandered up to yours.

“I told him that I liked his sister.”

You gasped silently, your eyes widening comically at Heeseung’s words. What did you even say to them? It was funny how you had been chasing after him for so long, and yet never imagined what might happen given the possibility that Lee Heeseung would feel the same way for you. And now that it was happening, you were helpless to react, your throat closing up and swallowing your words.

Then you remembered his strange reaction to Jeongseong’s words this morning, and if all made sense. “So this morning… You weren’t mad at me?

Heeseung smiled seeing your reaction. “I could never be mad at you,” he said, thumbs caressing your sides. “I’m sorry if it seemed that way… I was more frustrated with myself.” You gave him a questioning look. “I just knew I couldn’t keep hiding from the truth any longer: Your brother is smart, but he was wrong this time. He said I didn’t like you — but I do. I have for a while now.”

You didn’t even know what to say. If this was even real, or if you would wake up in your bed any second now with a hangover and the taste of vomit on your tongue. But all you knew right then and there was that you didn’t care if this was a dream or not. All you could think about was the you from two years ago, who had fallen for this man for the first time because she had looked into his eyes just like you were doing now.

“And what did my brother say after he punched you?” you asked breathlessly, your heart wrenching now that you knew just exactly why Heeseung was in the state he was.

Heeseung gave you that smile of his. The same one from when you meet. The same one you fell for. The same one you dreamt about every day since.

“He made me promise to love you like my life depended on it,” Heeseung replied. “And that’s exactly what I did.”

You don’t know who moved first. But within a split second, your lips met Heeseung, and a sharp hiss was ripped from his throat from the pressure on the cut on his lips. But before you could even think about pulling away, his hand found the nape of your neck, melding your lips further into his own.

Heeseung stole your kisses like it was breathing in air. You let him take them the same way he took your heart.

“I like you,” you whispered as you pulled away from him. “I like you so much.”

When the two of you fully parted form each other, you looked into Heeseung’s eyes to see an unfamiliar fire in them. “Before I ask you to be mine, I just have one question.” Heeseung smirked coolly as you swallowed nervously under his gaze. “About the guy you were with earlier…”

You blinked, surprised. “Sunoo? What about him?”

“You’re not a thing, are you?”

You raised your eyebrows, taking in Heeseung’s expression. The green in his eyes, and the distaste in his tone. You burst out into laughter upon seeing his jealousy shine through for the first time since meeting him, a warm feeling settling over your chest.

“I’m flattered you think every man I come across is interested in me…” you leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. “But just so you know — I’m single.”

Heeseung smiled softly, a distant memory of the past flashing through his mind. “Not anymore,” he claimed, before his lips found yours again.

You smiled into the kiss, too starstruck to do anything else.

All of a sudden, it was like you were seventeen again, and he was nineteen, playing guitar in your brother’s room. And just like then, you knew, your world was never going to be the same. With Lee Heeseung by your side, it could only be better.

✉️ PS 노트 ! this fic inspired by the drama ‘hidden love’ and the novel ‘secretly, secretly, but unable to hide it’. the pretty dividers with the bows are by @/v6que, but the header was made by me!

my name. | nishimura riki

PAIRING ▸ nishimura riki! x reader

GENRE ▸ detective! au, fantasy! au, high school! au, s2ls, romance, fluff, angst, humor, SLOW BURN

WC ▸ 15.6k

SUMMARY ▸ you supposedly get transported to a different world, where you encounter niki. apparently, you already existed here. note: past tense. so now you’re stuck in an alternate universe and technically, you’re supposed to be dead. 

AKA after facing the truth, you come to the realization that someone was definitely trying to kill you.

AN/NOTES ▸ mentions of death!!!, a murder mystery/whodunit, profanity, mentions of suicide, depictions of murder, a few curse words, violence, blood, dead bodies, some gorey stuff, kissing, nothing too harsh, excuse any typos/misspellings...

wow... i can't believe it but it is finally out... it's been a long time coming lol. with losing several family members and hospital visits over the past year, i wasn't sure if this was ever going to get released. thank you all for your endless (fr) patience and support. happy reading ❤️

a faceless figure stretches out a hand towards you.

you squint but for some reason, you still can’t make them out. the longer you stare, the more you realize it was a person—a blurry vision of a faceless boy. considering the matching uniform to yours, he must’ve gone to your school …was he your classmate? 

you frown. you’ve never seen anyone like him in class before. you stretch out your arm, fingertips barely grazing his- 

the sound of the school bell ringing causes your eyelids to fly open.  you groan, yawning and getting up from your seat by the window by default. 

it wasn’t a nice nap—just one that left you feeling groggy, unsettled, and strangely incomplete. 

you pack up your stuff quietly and leave the classroom alone, not bothering to look for your friends. as you walk down the stairs, you hear your classmates chattering about the weather.you glance outside. 

it was a dreary, unwelcoming kind of rain—part of the reason why you fell asleep earlier in class—and you suddenly feel the urge to get home. as soon as possible. 

you weren’t sure why, but it wasn’t just raining. it started to pour, especially hard, on this spring day. you want to think that was what made your mood all miserable and forlorn. 

not to forget the fact that you didn’t have an umbrella, leaving you no other choice but to throw your hood on and tighten the strings of your hoodie over your school uniform. not exactly the most stylish look, yet it was comfortable enough for you. 

you couldn’t put a finger on the emotion, but you felt out of place, like for some weird reason… you didn’t belong here. like you belonged out of this circle, away from this life and world. 

that feeling always came up when it started to rain, and you always tried your best to suppress it. but it was particularly strong today. 

you shrugged it off though. those “phases” weren’t uncommon, right? 

though you made it halfway out the school grounds by yourself, hyein and hanni catch up to you as you walk. you give them a half-hearted smile, “hey.”

it doesn’t take much for them to notice your off behavior. hyein eyes you. 

“you okay, y/n?” 

you debate internally, reminding yourself that they’re your friends. you can trust them, rely on them. you’re allowed to do that. even more so, aren’t you supposed to do that? 

but the words that come out of your mouth suggest otherwise. you shrug, “it’s nothing. it’s just been a weird day, you know?”

they share a glance before turning back to you, sympathetic smiles on their faces. hanni pats you on the shoulder, “yeah, we get it. you should get some rest at home, y/n. we’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“be careful on the way back! the rain doesn’t look like it’s stopping soon.” she calls out before they continue, leaving you behind—still as soaked as ever. 

you wave before sighing, gripping the straps of your backpack tighter and making your way towards the train station. the sound of the rain almost makes you fall into a daze as you go about your way. all your school stuff and clothes were definitely getting soaked, which probably meant an oncoming cold, but you could’ve cared less. 

the only thing that mattered was going home and sleeping off this weird feeling, so it could become tomorrow and you didn’t have to be in this situation anymore. 

the train station is strangely busy, you figure the downpour was making everyone go home sooner. you bypass several people, almost getting your soaked and stained shoes stepped on several times. all while muttering quiet “excuse me’s” to practically everyone and anyone who cared to listen. 

after what seemed like ages, you manage to make it to your train.  although, the large crowd surrounding the entrance effectively prevents you from getting anywhere. 

you mutter a curse, trying to navigate through the waves of people. you just barely get on before the doors begin closing. letting out a huff in relief, you lean back against the door and slowing yourself a moment to close your eyes in peace. all the seats were obviously taken at that point, so you had no choice but to stand. that’s fine—you end up drifting off anyway. 

you don’t know how long it’s been since you fell asleep. or why you feel even more exhausted when you wake up. but the robotic voice announcing your arrival makes your eyes automatically flutter open. you feel your body getting pushed and shoved around as everyone tries to get out all at once. 

so you grit your teeth and tug down your hood further until you can finally get out. you don’t pay much attention to your surroundings, too focused on not getting knocked to the ground. when you finally stumble out of the crowd onto the station platform, you try to collect yourself while shaking your head. then you frown, 

wait a second-

something solid knocks into you from the side, a rough oof! escaping out of their--mouth?

you’re knocked onto the ground, bottom first. pain shoots into your palms that tried (and failed) to catch your fall—and obviously, your butt as well. 

you groan, eyes flashing in annoyance at your unknown assailant. looking up, you stop at the sight of the… boy in front of you. 

you really have no idea why, but a question immediately pops into your head—

have you met before?

you don’t voice it, but it lingers in the back of your mind. the boy—as far as you can tell, he looks around your age— simply stares at you. he’s in a strikingly similar uniform. 

a flicker of recognition passes in his eyes before you watch his expression grow flabbergasted. he continues to stare at you for a solid minute, while you only stare back in confusion, still on the floor.

“it’s rude to stare, you know.” you finally state with a furrowed brow as you quickly gathering your bearings. 

his only response is a blink.  

it's like the two of you are frozen in time, everyone else getting drowned out in the moment. 

you frown, narrowing your eyes at him. “hello? did you hear me?” you repeat yourself and this time he snaps out of it. 

“y-you’re not supposed to be here.” he gets out shakily, looking around while his hand runs through his dark locks in distress. you cross your arms, “what do you mean? this is my stop…” 

you falter when you remember what you saw earlier. when you got off the train, you took a quick glance at the signs and posts. yeah, this definitely wasn’t your stop. 

that wouldn’t have been a huge issue- if it wasn’t for the fact that you never missed your station, no matter the circumstances.  

“no!” he exclaims and you flinch at the outburst. the boy glances at you again, and this time you involuntarily shiver at the unreadable look in his eyes. 

“you’re…. you’re supposed to be dead.”

your mouth drops open. 

“what a great first thing to say to someone you just bowled over. not even a sorry..” you mutter off, suddenly finding the strength to get up and wipe your hands. 

the boy takes a step back away from you. curiously, you take one forward, towards him. he gestures a hand at you almost aggressively. 

“you’re dead. you died. i swear-“

you hold out your hands in half desperation and half exasperation, “i dunno if this is some dumb prank or something i missed, but i hate to break it to you. i’m not dead. i’m literally right here in front of you. i think i would know if i died or not. i’m-” 

again, that feeling of being out of place washes over you. this time it steals your breath away. 

the strange boy shakes his head. “there’s no way. i know exactly who you look like.”

his next words make your blood run cold. 

“you’re exactly like y/n y/l/n—who died a week ago.” he looks you up and down again, hands curling into fists. 

“who are you? and why do you look just-?”

“because that’s who i am? my name is y/n! now, if you would excuse me.”  

you hold up a hand, you didn’t have the time or patience to deal with weirdos on the street. it did struck a little odd that he knew your name, but then again he must’ve gone to your school and heard of you somewhere. the only thing that unsettled you was his reaction. 

it just seemed too real, like he couldn’t have been that good at acting. 

he grabs your arm to prevent you from leaving. all he does is shake his head again like he’s just trying to reassure himself. you’re about to protest, so utterly confused at what’s happening-how you missed your stop and why this strange boy is saying that you’re dead. none of it makes sense. 

his face looks pale and grim, and you’re sure yours look exactly the same. “you can’t be y/n. and yet, here you are right in front of me.” 

“i will scream like a little girl for help if you don’t let me go at this-“

“p-please. this isn’t a joke. you can’t be here. we need to get out of here—where everyone can’t see you.” 

before you can even splutter a response, he drags you off. 

you can call me niki, his words echo in your head. 

his name rolls off your tongue unfamiliarly. in his states of panic—to which niki kept slapping himself and you kept denying that you were a hallucination—

you ended up introducing yourselves and deciding to find a better place to discuss. more like, niki decided. you soon began to regret that decision. 

all you wanted to do was go home, but this persistent kid you’ve never seen before wouldn’t let you or your conscience go. maybe it was the weird feeling from earlier, but you have the urge to at least hear him out. but when you walked out of that train station behind him, everything was wrong. 

you don’t know how to describe it. it was right but… at the same time, it wasn’t. 

to begin with, you ended up at the wrong station but it led you to the right street to get home. the streets name were the same, but the stores weren’t. 

and the bus stop—the bus driver that had worked there for fifteen years, the one you had greeted for fifteen years, suddenly became an entirely different person. he never missed a day, no matter what occasion it was. 

things weren’t right and you had no idea what was going on. 

following niki, you get lost in your thoughts. you shake your head, clapping a hand over your forehead. maybe… you’re just in a weird dream. a really realistic one, because none of this made sense. it wasn’t raining anymore either, which would’ve been fine, excluding for one tiny detail: the streets were completely dry. judging by the strength of the rain earlier, it really shouldn’t—no, it couldn’t have dried up that fast. 

It wasn’t physically possible. 

you could easily navigate your way around this area because you lived here all your life. and yet, it felt like you didn’t live here. not when this random stranger (only on a first name basis) keeps insisting that you died. 

niki—or whoever—leads you to a very familiar library, the same one where you spent hours studying for your finals. you head in, feeling a bit better hearing the familiar entrance chime. you walk ahead of him to take your spot by the back corner. the fact that this place was essentially the same gave you some comfort.

niki seems surprised, but he doesn’t say anything, only taking the seat across from you. 

“okay.” you start, glancing at the boy with wary eyes. 

“if whatever bs you’re spewing is true, explain.”

he raises his eyebrows. 

“me? explain?” 

you nod and he scoffs, “i think you’re the one who should be explaining. after all, you’re the one that’s supposed to be dead-“

“i’m not dead.” you grit out, rolling your eyes. 

“okay, okay,” he raises his hands in surrender, “but you still need to talk.”

you sigh, rubbing your temples. 

“what do you want me to say? that i got soaked, took the train home, overslept, and then missed my stop? then, i bumped into a weird boy-”

he shoots you an offended look, which you ignore. 

“-who keeps telling me that i died. oh, and the more and more i stay here with you, the more wrong everything gets?” you barely get the last word out before niki leans in, eyes focused intently on you. 

the closer he gets, you more you begin to malfunction. you unconsciously hold your breath, alarm and confusion evident in your eyes. his hand reaches out, slowly, to your head. your body freezes.

his fingers catch a drop of water at the tip of your hair. “sorry. that was bothering me.” 

you exhale, glaring at him. “are you serious?”

“yeah. are you?” 

“no,” you deadpan, “i’m a ghost and i’m haunting you. of course i’m being serious!” 

he gives you an unconvinced look and you roll your eyes, “i’m y/n y/l/n. we live an hour away from the capital. my house is two blocks away in the neighborhood with the broken fountain, and right now we’re at the library that doesn’t open on thursdays.  

you harshly tug off your suddenly dry hoodie, displaying your school uniform. 

“and by the looks of it, we go to the same school.”

his eyes widen as he leans in closer to study your uniform. you shrug away, caught off guard. then you frown, “but i’ve never seen you before at school. how do i know that you’re not some imposter?  that you somehow stole a uniform to get something from me?”

he rolls his eyes while you gaze at him suspiciously.

“obviously not, because that’s dumb.” 

you scoff. 

“i live here. why would i go through all the trouble to steal a uniform to get something from you? besides, what would i need from some-“ 

he glances at you and you tense,  

“-kid like you? you’re the one who came out of the train looking so suspicious, it’s like you appeared out of nowhere,” he counters. 

you place your palms flat on the table, “okay, it’s obvious we aren’t getting anywhere. we both don’t have answers and we’re not even close to one. all i know is that i’m alive,” you shoot him another look, “and that i somehow ended up here. now, can i go?”

there’s a brief pause before niki speaks up, slowly. “i already told you, you can’t be seen. come with me. and keep the hood on.” 

you roll your eyes. who was he to boss you around? 

he grumbles something along the lines of- “don’t want to be seen walking around with a dead person.” 

the only reason you listened was partly due to fear that you would lose your way in this familiar, yet unfamiliar place.   except, you know exactly where he’s taking you. because it’s the same neighborhood you live in. 

“wait,” you call out, “this is where i live.” you point to your house, and niki grimaces. 

“i know. there were police here for days.” 

you stop, unsure of what to say or do. police? at your house? when? 

you stare at your supposed house, suddenly dark and empty. what in the world happened? 

“come on,” niki calls out and you move to catch up. you’re starting to think niki may be telling the truth. 

soon enough, you make it to an unfamiliar house about a street down from yours. as niki unlocks the door, you take the opportunity to study him, trying to recall if you’ve ever seen him before. but when he turns to you, you clear your throat and look away. 

“this is my house,” he tilts his head while opening the door. 

you like the fact that it’s messy. it felt much more homey because of that. it was also a lot bigger than yours, filled with fancy and intricate things. to which you assume this niki guy has more money than he has yet to admit. he tells you to wait in the living room, and he soon returns with a stack of books. 

you pause, “yearbooks?“

he nods, “yeah, our school’s.” 

strangely enough, most of the covers are different than yours at home. 

but everything else is the same, like the name and logo. he pulls out this year’s yearbook and flips through before stopping at a page. 

“that’s me,” he points to the picture of him and you tilt your head, frowning.

“huh. so we are in the same year. but i’ve never seen you in my yearbook—or at school before. i swear i would’ve seen you at least once before...” 

you rub your temples, this whole situation was making your head hurt. none of it made sense. you study his picture, why in the world did he actually look good in his yearbook photo? your eyes shift toward his name, 

nish—

he turns the page before you can finish reading, only to get distracted by seeing familiar classmates in your yearbook. niki stays silent as he flips through pages and you continue to point out your friends and classmates and stare in wonder at the unfamiliar ones- 

ones that you’ve never seen before in your life but somehow their faces are printed on the page, in the same grade and same school as you. 

just like niki. you were actually speechless. 

eventually, he stops flipping eventually and looks at you. you catch his eye and glance down at the page, immediately catching on. you breath hitches. 

“no way—” 

“—and there’s you.” 

it is you. you can confirm, it’s a photo of someone who looks exactly like you. but… it’s not you. 

almost everything is the same, your face and clothes. your hair was cut shorter, and your smile wider for the picture. you were even wearing makeup, for crying out loud. you can only stare at the photo. 

according to niki, this you is dead? 

you look up at him, stomach churning. what in the world was going on? 

the silence lasts until niki finally speaks up with a hesitant tone. “i might be tripping, but have you ever heard of… alternate realities?” 

you shake your head firmly, “don’t even get me started on that-“

he cuts you off, “i know, i know. but just hear me out.” 

you have no choice but to internally whisper a quiet plea of help. he scoots closer, 

“wouldn’t it make sense? there’s really no other explanation. maybe it’s because i watched that spider-man movie recently, but you being from another world would explain how you’re alive right now—when in this world, you’re dead. plus, all the similarities and differences that you mentioned can be chalked up to different timelines—the butterfly effect and stuff like that.”

you don’t know what to say. 

could it actually be?

what other explanation could there be? 

“please say something,” niki mumbles and you release a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. 

“okay. okay. fine. say the whole multiverse crap is true. then how did i even get here? how did i—” 

you do air quotations, 

“—switch dimensions to another world?” 

niki shrugs, “no idea.”

he scratches his head, “it’s weird to think about but i mean, maybe there’s a reason why you came here.”

his voice suddenly gets lower and you shiver, “you know, the timing’s a bit weird that you showed up right after the other you passed away.”

you clear your throat, “let’s not think about that right now. we should probably focus on the whole me being dead thing, right?” 

“what?” 

you glance at him questioningly, “what?”

niki raises an eyebrow. “what’s there to focus on? you died.”

you don’t have to rub it in my face, you mumble under your breath. 

“shouldn’t we be focusing on how to get you back to your world?”

you roll your eyes, “sure, but still, i kinda want to know how i died? i think i deserve to, you know, so maybe i don’t make the same dumb mistake back home.” 

“-if you ever get home,” he corrects and you huff.

“whatever, just tell me. we don’t even know if your dumb alternate reality theory is right.” 

“okay,” niki rubs his hands nervously and you wait in anticipation. 

“well, it actually happened last thursday.”

you swallow. why was your heart rate picking up? 

“at school. on, uh, the rooftop. no one witnessed it, and the cctv was broken so we don’t have any exact answers. but from what I’ve heard,” he gives you a cautious glance, 

“the police are about ready to call it a suicide.” 

at first, you think you misheard him. but the hesitant gaze and pause proves you otherwise. 

at first it doesn’t hit you. but then suddenly you feel sick to your stomach. your hand grips the table for support as you try to take it all in. 

you? 

a suicide at school? 

what about your family, your friends-

“no,” you whisper, shaking your head.  “i… i would never-“

you slam your hands on the table, “i know myself. i would never do that.”

his face is grim and sympathetic, which you can feel the dislike churn in your stomach at that. “i’m really sorry… that’s the current situation. it kinda blew up at school, but everything’s still so recent that nothing is confirmed yet.“ 

unspoken words linger in the back of his head, that he questions if he should say it or not.  

that niki really didn’t know you that well, that you were just another classmate of his. one that he passed in the halls without a second glance back. that the you in his world-

was just a stranger to him. 

yet seeing you, desperate and alive, right in front of his eyes. he doesn’t know what to do or say. so niki watches you bury your head in your hands. and he waits. 

it’s only a couple of minutes later that you look up. his face morphs into one of surprise when he sees your determined expression. 

“niki,” you state carefully and he nods, waiting patiently.

“are you sure that i-i did it?”

you can’t bring yourself to say the word but niki gets it. he sighs, 

“no. no one’s sure. but from what i’ve heard, the police haven’t found any other motives so… a suicide seemed most likely.” the more and more niki talked, the more unsure he got. 

your face hardens. 

“so there’s no proof? the police aren’t doing their freaking job and investigating?” 

his eyes widen—surprised at your sudden outburst—and you sigh, voice falling to a whisper.

“did i really commit suicide? and why do i care so much?” 

something warm falls over your hand and you jump, glancing up.

even for only a split second, his hand covers yours in a sympathetic attempt, “i’m sorry y/n. i wish i had answers but i really don’t know…”

despite the awkward look on niki’s face and overall awkward situation, his words strangely comfort you. 

you bite your bottom lip. “i-i have to get to my house.”

he stiffens, “what?” 

you stare at him, eyes sharp, “if no one else is going to do something, i at least have to.” 

you need to. for yourself. 

niki scoots closer, “y/n, you can’t just-“

“i know. but i need to know. something just-ugh,” you rub your face in frustration, “something doesn’t add up. i have to check. it’s like i can feel it deep within me.”

he sits there wordlessly. when you don’t get a response, you stand up. niki splutters, “w-where are you going?”

you cross your arms, “without or without you, i’m going to my house.” 

he slaps a hand to his face in frustration. “just how stubborn are you?” he mumbles. you hear it and yet you decide to ignore him. 

“thanks for the help i guess,” you give him a (weak) half-smile before turning towards the door 

“wait! you’re being serious?!” 

his desperate voice calls out and you internally debate if you should listen to him or not. slowly, you turn back around, “yeah. do you need something?”

“no, but you do— a plan. especially since the police closed off your house for investigation. plus, most of the evidence would have been taken already.” he clasps his hands together behind his back.

you shrug. “okay, and? i’ll still find a way. i have nothing to lose. i’m not even supposed to be alive.”

he groans loudly and you raise an eyebrow.

“idiot. i’m trying to say that i’ll help you. i-i want to help you.”

“i didn’t ask,” you raise your hands in mock surrender.  annoyed, niki puts his hands on his hips.

“sure, but i know plenty of things you don’t. this is my world. so, are you gonna accept or not?”

“you wish you did,” you retort, yet you can’t help the small smile that grows on your face, “but… i would appreciate it. just be grateful that i’m accepting your dumb theory from a spider-man movie as of right now.” 

niki gulps at the sight. it was the first time he saw you smile since you met. at least, the first smile he saw from the you of an alternate universe. 

“whatever you say,” he holds out a hand, 

“miss imposter.” 

you take it gladly, harshly.  “don’t call me that-“

“my name is y/n y/l/n.” 

you spin around in niki’s chair, having went up to his room to figure out your so called master plan. niki (respectfully) offered to let you stay in his room for the length of your “visit.” 

to which you almost punched him. 

but he explained that there were no extra guest rooms and you were still technically dead, so hiding in his room was the best bet as to not raise any questions. you could take the makeshift bed in the corner of his room as to not raise suspicion. you were surprised yet grateful. 

“i’ll grab extra blankets and pillows. and i’ll sneak you food and whatever you need.” 

“what about clothes and toiletries?”

he yawns, “easy. i’ll steal some from my sisters.” 

you feel bad, but you realize you have no other choice. you were literally stuck here. 

a part of you still wondered if this was a dream. a horrible one, at the least. but while you were stuck here, might as well make the best of it. niki graciously offered and you had no choice but to accept. you almost scoff at the ridiculousness of the situation. 

“so basically, i’m like a secret pet you’re hiding from your parents?” 

“technically… yes,” niki rubs his hands together, and you can only watch the mischievous expression grow on his face.

“but i like to think that you’re like eleven. you’re different—you’re special, like her.”

you hold back a laugh at the words. 

clearing your throat, you try to play it off. “from stranger things? your world has that show too?” he lets out a scandalous gasp and this time you giggle. 

“of course, dude. what kind of world would i be living in if i didn’t have stranger things?” 

“apparently a horrible one,” you snort. 

after the whole living situation was sorted out, you returned to your investigation. 

“so you’re saying the police taped off my house for further examination?”

“uh, yeah? that’s how it works?” he raises a brow. 

you stuck your tongue out at him, “okay,  smartass. then how do we get in?” 

“clearly, there’s only one way: sneak in.” 

“i don’t think this is a good idea?” niki whisper shouts at you and you shush him. 

the sun was barely setting. if anyone knew you, they knew you really couldn’t be deemed as patient of any sort. 

niki watches you struggle up the tree in your backyard. 

obviously, going through the front door was a no go. luckily this house looked pretty much the same as your house, at least from the outside. you knew your parents weren’t home judging by the darkness.  you wondered if they were staying with other family. 

or were they at work? so soon after your death? 

you grimace, now was not the time to be getting in your feelings.

the best (only) option was jumping the backyard fence and going in through your bedroom window. leading to your predicament now.  

you exhale heavily when you find a place to rest, gripping the tree with all your might in hopes that you don’t fall 

you glance down at niki. 

“can you make it?”

he scoffs,  

“easy.” 

it was easy— easy for you to watch niki struggle to get up to your point. 

you were sort of scared the tree wasn’t going to support both your weights, at the way it was trembling slightly. niki makes it though, by the time the sun is well down. 

you can see him sweating heavily and your nose scrunches in amusement,“easy, huh?”

“yeah, for you just standing there and watching me. we don’t have all day, grandma.”

“don’t call me that,” you mutter while stretching out towards your window.

niki’s eyes widen. 

“be careful, y/n.” 

“i got it,” you stretch out a leg to the ledge and your sweaty hands begin to slide from the bark, most likely from exertion. 

without even thinking about it, niki places his hands around your waist to stabilize you. you don’t notice in your concentration to not fall to your death. you certainly didn’t want another dead you. 

your foot clicks the lock, and with a grunt you’re able to push the window open. 

“you got it?” 

“yeah,” you breathe out, clumsily making your way in. you reach out a hand for niki and he takes it, maneuvering his long body in through the small window. 

finally, you can breathe. 

it’s the first time you have the luxury to desperately wish that you were home right now. your real home. you certainly didn’t mean this home, the empty and cold looking one locked up for the police’s investigation. 

after catching your breath, you get up to examine your surroundings. you weren’t not sure what you were expecting. this was the other you’s room. 

all you can think is, at least this y/n was much cleaner than you. 

a part of you feels like you’re invading someone’s privacy. but then you realize that it’s literally your own privacy that you’re invading, with the addition of niki. you actually can’t believe the absurdity of the situation. 

at first glance the room looks pretty normal, an average teenagers room.  not what you expected for yourself, but there’s not much you can see. you turn to niki,

“there’s no shot we’ll get caught right?”

he gives you another sympathetic look, “we’ll keep a look out for the police, but i heard your parents were busy with your other family and funeral preparations, so it wouldn’t be them catching us.”

“oh.”

the air feels so glum, you clear your throat to move on. “guess we should look around?”

he nods and begins to snoop around.  

“wait,” you call out hesitantly. 

niki cocks his head and you cough awkwardly.

“it’s still my room, so like, be careful with what you look through.” 

he rolls his eyes. “yeah. i got it.” 

you gaze at the photos on your shelf, displaying your happy family and friends. it just made you acknowledge how precious they were. it made you miss your friends and family at home even more.  

you’re appalled at the books you read. you shake your head, seriously? you take out one of the books-

“ten days to love,” you voice aloud with disgust written across your face. 

you weren’t one to judge, but what kind of cheesy romance novels were you reading?  

niki opens your closet and you turn at the sound. your eyes widen- 

wait a second, 

your closet with clothes? possibly including…. more personal things? 

you dash over in desperation, praying that niki hasn’t already seen something that he shouldn’t. 

“don’t!” 

his wide eyes meet your panicked ones, shocked at the sudden change of events. he doesn’t move until you push past him, blocking the door from his view. 

“you didn’t see anything, right?” you stare at niki desperately and he furrows his eyebrows. 

“no? am i not supposed-“

“no reason. just being cautious. we can, uh, open it together.”

you carefully examine your belongings inside before deeming it safe for niki’s eyes. you let out a sigh of relief.

he gives you a weird look and you shoot him an exaggerated smile. 

“you can proceed!” 

he mutters something under his breath as you continue your search on the other side of the room. it didn’t seem like there was anything of importance on the shelves. but, after careful examination, you see a glimpse of something. pushing past some folders, your face morphs into a stunned one. 

you pull out… 

a pink teddy bear with hearts? why would this be in your room? 

and even more so, why was it hidden? 

niki calls out your name and you turn around. your mouth drops open. 

“a box of chocolates?“ 

he scoffs, “yeah. stuffed behind some clothes in your closet for some reason.”

“it’s not even the good brand,” you mutter. 

niki laughs, “maybe you had secret admirers from school?” suddenly, you give him a suspicious glance. 

“what makes you say that? you sure you weren’t one of them?” 

he side eyes you, “trust me, you wouldn’t catch me within five feet of you at school.”

you walk over to shove his arm and he only laughs harder. you huff, suppressing a smile on your face as you turn away. but you keep niki’s comment in the back of your mind. 

after a solid thirty minutes, you can feel your resolve waning. there was no sign indicating that you felt suicidal. at least, none that you found after the police probably scrounged through everything. some stuff was suspicious— 

like the teddy bear and chocolates. and some lavish perfume and makeup in the drawers. that just wasn’t your style. but you supposed this world’s you was just different. 

just because you weren’t particularly into those things didn’t mean another you couldn’t be. 

“did i have a diary? what about my phone?”

niki frowns, “the police would’ve taken it. it’s their evidence now.” 

you suddenly get an idea, and it’s probably wasn’t a good one. 

“hey, niki?” you call out. he hums in response.  

“what day and time is it, currently?” 

“uh…” he checks his watch, “sunday. 8pm. why?”

“when does the police station close?”

dummy, most people would say--why would the police station be closed?

luck seemed to be on your side, because you knew especially well from complaints by locals, that your local police station did actually have a curfew. and you could only hope it was the same here.  

niki scratches his head, “in ten minutes? why are-“

his mouth drops open, “no. no. no.” you shrug and he shakes his head adamantly, “y/n, there’s no way that we’re going to sneak in.”

you dust off your hands, “i’m all ears for any other ideas you have.”

you have him at that and he falls silent. after a couple moments, he speaks up albeit hesitantly. “well… i might have a way.“

you grin. “onwards, then.”

“wait, so how did you manage to get access again?”

he coughs, “my friend jungwon is the son of the police deputy chief… so i may have called in for a favor.”

“he managed to sneak in with his dad’s keys and get the files to my case?” you finish.

he nods. 

“illegally?”

he nods again.

you tap your chin, “would we get arrested if we got caught?” 

he shrugs, “probably.”

“good thing i’m not from this world.”

perhaps secretly hanging outside this jungwon’s house was not the best idea, either. he rolls his eyes before offering the file to you.

“do you want to open it?” to your surprise, his voice comes out quite comforting and soft. 

you gulp, “i guess i should.”

you feel sick for the second time that day. luckily, the photo didn’t show too much. not that it made it any better. it was still you, dead. 

you had to look at yourself and imagine yourself in that situation. you cover your mouth and niki immediately takes the file away from you. he watches worriedly as you shake your head.

“i’m fine. i-is there anything else your friend managed to get?”

“are you sure?”

“yes.” he doesn’t protest anymore at the tone of finality in your voice. 

niki pulls out a bag with your name on it. taking a deep breath in, you open it. you shuffle through some things hurriedly until niki speaks up.

“hold on a sec,” he softly places a hand on your arm to stop your actions.

“we should be careful. someone could notice that we tampered with the evidence so we need to be very careful when putting things back. plus, we have to give it back to him as soon as possible—we don’t want them noticing that your stuff is missing.”

you curse, “that’s right. we can’t risk taking anything.” 

“then what?” 

you pinch your nose bridge, “we snap pictures and hope it’s good enough. unless we want to take another field trip here.” 

you manage to snap a few pictures and go through a few things. you catch a glimpse of your diary and flip to the most recent page. it was about a week and a half ago, and-

it wasn’t finished. you skim through it, reading boring stuff about how your day was and how you met-

you squint.

the rest of the words were scratched out, harshly, with a black marker. seeing how it was getting late and dark, you can’t make out who’s name it was even with your phone flashlight. you wonder, could it be-

your thoughts are interrupted by niki. 

“y/n, i think we need to hurry and head home soon. the longer we stay out, the greater risk we’re at for getting caught. oh, and i found your phone.”

he holds it up and the extremely glittery case makes your eyes hurt. you eye it. heaving a deep breath, you prepare yourself to open your phone. 

but when you click the power button and nothing happens, you groan. you try again, and again, holding it down for seconds but the screen remains black.

“the phone’s dead.” you sigh again and niki bites his lip.

“maybe we should give up. we can ask jungwon another time,” he suggests

you nod wearily and he closes the box. as he gathers everything, opening his phone to text his friend to come back out, you glance at the time. it was quite late for a school day. 

“that’s right, you have school tomorrow?”

he groans, “yeah. i guess you’ll just have to stay home in my room. no one will go in while i’m at school, so you don’t have to worry.”

you nod, “okay.”

it felt weird knowing you were supposed to be at home, in bed and preparing to go to school yourself the next day. instead, you were stuck in another world—in a stranger’s room, forced to hide since you were supposed to be dead. 

were you considered missed at home? did anyone notice? call the cops? 

more like, if anyone cared? 

while you get ready for bed in niki’s bathroom, you stare at yourself in the mirror. 

yes, you affirm, you’re alive. 

you’re staring back at yourself, dressed in one of niki’s oversized shirts and basketball shorts. 

but the image of your dead face flashes in your mind and you immediately squeeze your eyes shut. you breathe heavily, hands planted on the sides of the sink. 

everything’s fine. you will get back home. things will figure themselves out. you’re okay. you’re breathing and-

a knock on the door makes you jump.

“y/n? everything okay?” niki’s voice sounds out hesitantly, “it seemed like you were taking a while so-“

the door swings open.

you stand there, face emotionless. he doesn’t say anything, and neither do you. niki tries to keep the image of you wearing his clothes out of his head, but it won’t seem to go away.

“goodnight, niki.” 

you slowly walk over to the temporary bed he’s set up on the floor for you. he blinks, 

“night, y/n.” 

it’s surprisingly comfortable, or maybe you’re just so exhausted you don’t seem to care or question anything anymore. 

you hear light footsteps padding to turn off the lights. 

in the darkness, your eyes close. but your mind is awake.

you know his is too, judging by the sounds of quite shuffling every couple minutes or so.

“niki?” you say quietly.

another shuffle. 

“yeah?”

“this may sound weird, but have you noticed anyone that looked particularly sad?”

there’s a pause. 

“about you?”

“yeah, but not like the typical sadness. like, anyone who seems to have changed drastically after hearing about me? let’s say,” you swallow, “any guys or friends of yours who seemed particularly upset or affected?”

niki rolls to the other side of his bed so that he faces you, but in the darkness he can only see the outline of your figure. “y/n, what are you trying to say?”

you tug the covers over yourself a little tighter. 

“nevermind, niki. have a good day at school tomorrow, and don’t worry about waking me up. you won’t be able to.”

“wasn’t planning on it,” he snorts. 

you fall asleep with a faint smile still lingering on your face. 

the next day at school, niki struggles. he struggles when it’s supposed to be another normal day, and all he can think about is you. 

especially about what you said.

niki never paid much attention before to his surroundings, there was no reason to. but now he keeps an eye open.

he eyed anyone who passed by your locker, empty desk in class, anyone who mentioned your name. but the fact that you mentioned guys specifically, made him confused. 

why did it matter if a guy was upset? a lot of people were shocked and sad at the news. niki shook his head. he didn’t get it. 

meanwhile, you stayed at his home.

thinking. 

thinking about yesterday. somehow everything that happened was all just yesterday. you took the train and ended up here. then you found out you were apparently dead. 

you spent what felt like hours scrolling through the photos you took and waiting for niki to come home. all while eating snacks that niki left for you graciously. 

you don’t even know what time it is when you hear the door begin to open. you scramble to your feet before realizing that there was a chance it wasn’t niki. 

you go back to your hiding spot, shrinking underneath the covers. next thing you know, the bedroom door flings open. you tense.

however, a call of your name allows you to let out a sigh of relief. you hop up, “niki!”

he grins, looking rather cute in his ruffled school uniform, backpack slung off one shoulder. you stop yourself, horrified at your thought. at your face falling, he cocks his head. “what’s wrong?”

you laugh awkwardly, “nothing! nothing at all!” 

he gives you an unconvinced look but doesn’t press further. 

“you must’ve been bored without me.” 

that was the niki you’ve come to know (in the span of a day or so).  sarcasm drips from your lips as you laugh dryly, “sure.” 

but you knew he was right and he knew it too. 

“i spent the day looking through the pictures, but i couldn’t find much else,” you frown. 

“same here. today was pretty normal, no one seemed any different than usual…” 

“i mean, the mood has been somber ever since you,” he pauses, “left. but nothing out of the ordinary.” 

you seemingly deflate, but niki perks up. “i talked to jungwon and he said he’s going to try and get your phone next time. we can only hope that someone charges it or that we can charge it ourselves.” 

you nod, “that’s good.” 

“but, don’t you have work to do? what about your family?”

you realized you didn’t see or even hear of them yesterday. 

“oh, they usually stay late at the dance academy—me included. but my grades haven’t been good recently, so they’ve been forcing me to go to home and study…”

you tsk as niki gives you a sheepish look. 

“you know, while we’re waiting, i’m not too bad at studying myself. what do you need help with?” 

niki rolls his eyes, “thanks, but no thanks. i don’t need another person on my back about my grades.” 

instead, he falls back onto his bed with an oof. 

“don’t worry, i’ll manage. let’s just talk about our next step. 

“step? as in, my case?

“yeah,“ his eyes glint, “i have an idea.”

you were starting to believe he was getting more invested in this than you were. 

“okay—shoot.”

what was the worse thing he could suggest?

“we should sneak you into school-“

your eyes practically bulge as you gape at him. “excuse me? weren’t you the one saying i was going too far with sneaking into my own house and you want me to do what?” 

niki gets up, placing his arms on your shoulders to calm you. strangely enough, it did. 

“hear me out first—we sneak into school at night, bust open your locker, and see what you have. that’s better than waiting for jungwon.”

“don’t you think the police would have already looked through my locker? 

“well, he looks around nervously, “as far as i’ve heard, the police were already mostly convinced the case was closed and didn’t care to check. but, what can i say? rumors are just rumors.” 

you purse your lips. what did you have to lose? being in a different world made you much more reckless than you would have ever thought. but that didn’t mean you were going to be stupid about it.

“fine.” 

niki winces at your tone, but you speak up,

“how in this stupid multiverse crap am i going to break into my own locker? and with cameras all around school?

he smirks and you raise an eyebrow.

“i didn’t miss a whole chem lecture for nothing—“ 

confused, you give him a look as if to say, what in the world are you talking about? 

“who said we had to know the combination?” he takes out a pair of keys form his pocket. 

you gasp in awe, clasping a hand over your mouth.

you gaze at him with wide eyes for a second, causing him to look at you questioningly. 

“you’re actually being smart...” 

his confused expression immediately changes to one of irritation. 

you stand up straight again, “how did you even get those keys? and what about the cameras?” 

he winks and you glance at him, trying to remain expressionless. if there was anything you noticed, it was that niki was actually quite attractive. it made you wonder if he was popular at school…

“it’s a secret. don’t worry about it.” 

“you sure have a lot of secrets, niki. like, is niki even your real name?” you squint accusingly. 

niki chokes on his spit, “how in the world did you know?” 

you falter. “huh? it isn’t?” 

he clears his throat, “anyway, i have to get up early for school tomorrow.” 

you eye him but decide to let it go. niki shrugs, “usually i’m up playing games, but you look like you need the sleep with those eye bags. you aren’t surprised.

“tomorrow night,” he says shortly after. “i’ve got a plan—you just have to trust me.”

turns out said plan was dumb, but you really had no other choice. 

niki made some lame excuse to his teachers about staying late to study- and his teachers, being utterly shocked that he offered to study, immediately agreed to let him linger. 

meanwhile, niki would sneak you in, wearing one of his old uniforms that was too small for him so that just in case, no one would question anything. along with one of his totally inconspicuous baseball caps to hide your face and hair. 

you sigh, you couldn't believe you were sneaking into school through the boys bathroom. you groan while maneuvering through the window. niki shushes you, causing you to stick your tongue out at him. he raises his hands playfully and you resist the urge to smack him. 

on your way to jump down from the window, your left foot gets caught on the ledge. you stumble forward, expecting to be met with the revolting bathroom floor face first. instead, perhaps now was the time to thank the universe (in this case, his universe?) for niki’s quick reflexes.

he inhales, catching you by catching and pulling you towards him instead of the ground, essentially into his arms. 

instead of faceplanting into the ground rather foolishly, you fall into his strangely soft and warm chest. you let out a barely discernible squeak, unable to respond due to the pounding of your heart. 

after a couple of seconds—that felt like forever— niki lets you go with a shake of his head. 

“my god y/n, i had no clue you were this clumsy. please don’t ever do that again.” 

please don’t ever make me sneak into a nasty teenage bathroom again, you wish you could retort. 

you shake your head quickly, lips pressed thinly together. don’t get distracted, you remind yourself.  “yeah-thanks. let’s uh, just hurry.“

you don’t have time to wonder what would the consequences be if you got caught by cameras or anyone else while niki leads you down the familiar hallways. 

“how do you know which one’s my locker? i thought you said we didn’t really know each other?“ you eye him suspiciously.

he scoffs, “don’t get too excited. mine’s just a couple lockers down so i was bound to see you at your locker by some point.” 

he hands you the keys and you gratefully accept—your hands slightly trembling. you didn’t know what to expect. 

niki watches from behind, and you can feel his warm breath on you occasionally, causing you to shiver.

with a slight click and creak of the rusty locker door, the locker opens. you hold your breath at first glance. it’s…. normal? 

normal as in any average high schoolers locker one would expect. what catches your eye first are a couple of photos of you and your friends. 

on deeper inspection of yourself (it was still weird to imagine and even weirder to see) you see a twinkling, intricate chain around your neck. maybe you were tripping (again, but mentally this time) or that necklace you had on seems really expensive? 

“there’s no way,” you suddenly gasp and turn to niki with wide eyes. 

“what?” niki starts to panic, “what is it?” 

“am i actually loaded in this world?” 

niki pinches the bridge of his nose as he shakes his head. “jesus, you scared me. i mean, you didn’t seem like it.. who knows where you got that super expensive, luxury brand necklace? it looks familiar…“ 

you try your hardest not to roll your eyes. of course, niki would know. 

“how much are you talking?” 

he taps his foot on the floor, “well, my mom and sister likes that brand. that specific necklace is specially made since it’s a seasonal limited edition, so it’s somewhere in the thousands-“

you truly forgot how rich niki’s family was, you think with a half joking tch and a shake of your head. niki glances at you, impressed. 

“-whoever gave that to you must’ve really cared.” 

you frown, “sure… or maybe i just really worked hard to get it for myself?” 

he’s shoots you an amused look, “you wanted to get yourself the valentine day’s collection necklace? 

“what?” 

you feel your heart rate begin to pick up, “are you implying what i think you are? 

“yes?” he responds with a raised eyebrow, “someone must’ve been really in love with you to gift you that. maybe your parents or friends?” 

then niki pokes your side playfully, “-or a secret admirer?” 

you don’t answer his question, regardless of if he was being serious or not. you peer into the locker again, “but where is it? it’s so valuable i’m certain we would’ve seen it in the police’s evidence…” 

suddenly, niki grabs your wrist. that’s when you hear the footsteps. you turn to him with wide eyes as he mouths for you to hide.  panicking, you look around in desperation before he pushes you—

straight into the locker. 

your own locker. 

you know you should be freaking out over getting caught, but you could only wonder—could this be considered a crime? 

in the dark, stuffy locker, you see a glimpse of niki’s silhouette run past through the tiny openings of the door. just barely a second later, you hear more footsteps. squinting, you able to discern a familiar, yet weirdly unfamiliar guy. your eyebrows raise. 

no way. park sunghoon was in this world too? 

you hold your breath when you hear him call out, “is someone there?” 

really, curse niki for shoving you in your own locker. yet it was also a smart move as no one could see into your locker, but you were able to see out. 

“sorry. that was me, pres.” 

it was niki’s voice. 

you can barely see his relaxed demeanor appearing to face sunghoon. 

“i was staying back to study and catch up on work—you know already,” he adds hastily. 

sunghoon nods coolly, “i was just checking. making sure everything’s good before leaving.” 

niki was a little too good at acting, you questioned how often he had done this to those around him. he fake salutes, “i promise to clean up after i’m done. no need to worry, class president.” 

“alright, see you later.” 

you have a sigh of relief as sunghoon turns to leave. 

but you swear, for a split second, his expression changes as his eyes fall on your locker. 

your heart rate picks up. did he notice you? 

however, sunghoon leaves without a second look back. 

you frown—what was that? 

after waiting a minute to be safe, niki quickly lets you out. only to be greeted by your displeased face and crossed arms. 

“that was the only thing i could think of in the moment!” he immediately defends himself. 

“seriously? i could’ve-like-“ you trail off and niki smirks.

“see? nothing bad would’ve happened.”

“doesn’t change the fact you stuffed me in my locker. it’s not even mine, for crying out loud.” 

“whatever. just be glad you didn’t get caught by park sunghoon, our school’s super rich, smart, and handsome-“

“i know him from my world. he’s irrelevant, let’s continue on.” you wave him off. 

you can’t help but compare him to niki. niki was way more genuine and… boyish in a way? he felt real. you preferred that. not to mention he had a much more tolerable presence, you supposed. 

everything else in the locker was useless. random crappy notes, perfumes and hand lotions, along with the pictures you already inspected were the only things that decorated your locker. no sign of that ridiculously expensive necklace. 

you rub a hand over your face in exasperation. “that’s it…”

one thought still lingered in the back of your mind. where was the necklace? 

“hey, y/n, i think we should get going soon. the lights are going to turn off soon-they’re automatic and we didn’t bring any flashlights.” 

you sigh. next time. 

it feels like you’ve hit a dead end. by the end of the week, niki has caught up on his studies. you were surprised to find that he was quite dedicated to school, even if it didn’t seem like it. 

the days that niki came home with a pile of schoolwork and other duties, you went out to think—with one of niki’s hoodies and a mask on. but the times you spent with niki since you couldn’t go out much, mainly at night, were nice. 

tutoring him at subjects he was struggling in, learning new dances together (and learning how talented he really was), simply being around him was enough to distract you from your impending crisis. 

niki always came to keep you company and bring you food. you really were his eleven. 

niki was gaming while you sat off to the side, watching him play. you admired his side profile, the shine from the bright computer screen enhancing his features, the furrow of his eyebrow as he focused. 

he yells as his character dies and you can’t hold back your laughter, “you kinda suck-“

all of a sudden, you hear a knock on the door. 

“bro, you good? i swear i heard another voice-“

the door handle begins to turn.

you and niki share a look of panic. 

your first instinct is to dive and roll, underneath niki’s bed. you ignore the fact that it’s as dusty as you’d expect for a teenage boy’s room and hold your breath. 

“mom said dinner is ready. also, what’s with all the noise? it sounded like someone else was in the room with you.” a girls voice—niki’s older sister, you presume. 

“nope. just me.” 

you cringe at the fact that niki’s voice is octaves higher. it wouldn’t be that much of a problem if his voice wasn’t as deep as it normally was. 

“it was just probably the video i was playing.” 

“…sure,” you hear his sister’s footsteps as she leaves and shuts the door behind her. 

you let out an exhale of relief. 

“y/n?” you hear soon after. 

“under here.” 

you turn to see niki’s head peeking down underneath the bed. 

you meet his curious eyes. cute. 

“jeez.” he holds a hand out and you gladly accept it, letting him pull you up with ease. huffing, you dust yourself off. 

“jeez, indeed. who knows what horrors you’ve been hiding under there.”

“hey,” niki defends himself, “i’ll have you know i am a very clean person and don’t-“

“oh really? then what’s this?” you hold up the sacred item, jerking your hand back as he reaches out to snatch it. 

“hey! haven’t you ever heard of privacy?” 

he lunges again as you laugh, just keeping it out of his grasp. however, you feel the bed frame hit your legs, and you gasp. 

you fall back, niki over you on his bed. he must’ve underestimated his arm-span and overestimated yours. 

niki lands over you with a soft grunt, eyes wide. you peer up at him wordlessly. his arms catch him, but it’s still so close you can feel his hair tickle your forehead. 

is this what the movies mean when your heart… skips a beat? 

niki snaps out of his trance, “s-sorry,” he hastily gets up. you cough, trying to dispel the stuffy atmosphere. 

“so, uh, i had an idea.”

“yeah? what’s up?”

“i was thinking we look at the evidence again. i just want to double check something.”

“come on,” you take niki’s hand. it was habitual by this point. 

“you got the charger, right?”

niki nods, taking it out of his pocket. 

it was risky asking niki’s friend to retrieve the evidence for you again, but you needed to confirm your suspicions. or, hit a dead end. 

when niki returns, carefully holding a plastic bag (and dinner, your grumbling stomach reminds you), your eyes zero in on one thing. 

“thanks. i know it must be hard for your friend to sneak behind his dad’s back like that.” 

“it’s fine,” niki shrugs, “i promised to buy him lunch for the next week.” 

you snort as you take out “your” phone and plug it into the charger. 

“okay. now we wait.” 

niki looks at you expectantly, and you only stare at him back. subconsciously, a hand raises to your face. “is there something wrong?”

he shakes his head while looking away sheepishly, “nothing, nothing.”

you open your mouth to question him further, but the phone screen flashes. you scramble to open it. thankfully you were able to use your own face id. 

as soon as you scroll through your messages, your stomach sinks. you raise a hand to cover your mouth. 

“what?” niki jumps up, “what did you find?”

you open the photos app, which only confirms everything. you drop the phone, and that’s when niki sees it. 

“oh my god.” 

“don’t even-“

“i was secretly dating park sunghoon?!”

you cup a hand over your mouth. “i think i’m gonna be sick.” 

niki scoffs, taken aback. “b-but how? you- and him-?”

you rub a hand over your face. “don’t ask me. but the valentines gifts and necklace were so suspicious, i started wondering… i just didn’t expect it to be him.” 

niki notices the sour expression on your face. 

“oh. you don’t like him?”

you shake your head vehemently, “bro, not even if he and i were the last two people on earth.”

you think about your world’s sunghoon and almost shudder. he was selfish, arrogant, could but would never keep a girl for more than two weeks. yet the whole class still loved him and you never understood it, never understood the appeal of him. 

besides getting bro-zoned, niki relished your words. 

“good to know.” 

“i wish i didn’t,” you sigh.

but that was besides the point. you still didn’t know how it all added up. did sunghoon—unfortunately, your boyfriend in this world—have anything to do with your death? did he really get you that expensive necklace? 

and as much as you wanted to deny it, you couldn’t rule it out. thinking as rationally and fairly as possible, suicide was likely-as much as you didn’t believe it. you couldn’t rule it out simply based on a feeling. plus, his expression when he passed by your locker lingered in your mind. 

“so, now what?” niki watches you carefully. 

“you’ve heard of the saying, keep your friends close but your enemies closer, right?”

“yeah,” he cocks an eyebrow, “why?”

“well, i’ve got a task for you.” 

niki has never spoken a word to your friend group in his entire life. the most he’s ever done was send a cold look their way and pretend not to know them out in public. 

he had nothing against them—nothing against your choice of friends—but he preferred not to associate with your group. he couldn’t put his finger on it, but he just didn’t vibe with them. 

and yet here he was, talking to your “friends” because you asked him to. he sighed, the things he did for you. 

danielle looks him up and down with her arms crossed. “why are you asking about y/n? since when did you care about them?”

“please,” he sighs in exasperation, “i just need to know if anyone disliked y/n or was acting suspicious around them.”

haerin steps up, an annoyed frown on her face. “there’s no one. can’t you tell this is a touchy subject for us? now, leave us alone.” 

she grabs danielle and walks off, angrily whispering into a distressed looking danielle’s ears. 

niki wants to punch someone. besides the fact that surrounding people were catching onto his conversation and whispering about the interaction, he essentially got nothing out of it. 

you were also at a dead end. after scrolling through hundreds of disgusting texts and photos of you and sunghoon, there was nothing remotely suspicious. plus, you had to give your phone back to jungwon soon before anyone noticed it was missing. 

everything seemed normal. everything was normal. normal until this world’s you suddenly died. 

the only lead you had was the missing necklace. and yet where were you supposed to find it? it could be anywhere—in the police’s hands, with sunghoon, most likely gone. 

you couldn’t even go out on your own, you felt like a hopeless rapunzel trapped in her tower, desperately wishing for answers and freedom. it was starting to get to you. the stress, homesickness, and most of all, loneliness. 

you throw your phone to the side and bury your face in your hands, trying your best to focus on your breathing. you almost don’t realize how long it’s been until you hear a faint call of your name. 

“y/n? y/n, what’s wrong?” niki drops his backpack and rushes to your side. 

his eyes carefully examine your body, checking for who knows what. you slowly lower your hands, revealing your bloodshot eyes and tear stained face. 

what scared niki the most was the lost look in your eyes, a deep and dark pool void of any emotion. 

“niki… i don’t think i can do this anymore,” your words float out carefully, like a whisper of the wind. 

“i’m trying my hardest, but it’s so frustrating. i miss my home, i miss my life. i miss myself.” as soon as the words leave your mouth, you feel yourself break down. and right as you do so, niki reaches forward to wrap you in an embrace. 

“i want to go home,” you whisper in an small voice. 

his heart almost breaks at the sight. you sounded like a little kid—you looked like you were a little kid again, as small and curled up you were when he found you. in his eyes, he saw a lost child looking for their parents, their guidance and their own light in the world. 

he resolves to never be the cause of your pain again. 

niki holds you for the entire night as you cry and drift off to sleep. 

you wake up with a headache and a dry throat. you feel hungover, although you’ve basically never drank alcohol before. 

somehow, you’re not sure exactly when, you ended up in niki’s bed. as soon as you’re able to sit up, your eyes fall on the clock on the bedside table. 

11 am. niki must be at school still, you note. 

you wonder what he’s up to, if he was being a good student while you were stuck all alone at his home, skipping your own school. you wonder what life is like back at home. did time even pass? 

niki heads home as soon as the bell rings. he wanted to see you, to comfort you and reassure you. he wanted you to be okay. 

when he knocks on his own bedroom door and there’s no response, he frowns. all there’s left is a pink sticky note on his desk. 

went out for fresh air. don’t worry and don’t look for me. 

niki immediately drops his stuff and runs out. he goes to the train station, the bookstore. he even goes back to school, for crying out loud. 

he’s breathless and exhausted by the time he’s arrived back home. niki knows his family won’t be back. it was competition season, which meant the busiest time of the year for the other dancers. you were the sole reason he attended school at this time of the year, studying hard instead of skipping and dancing 18 hours each day. 

he’s scared. 

niki hasn’t felt this feeling in a long time—he can only recall the time where he was six and went to disney world. his older sister was pressuring him into riding one of the larger roller coasters, and he felt that sickening nausea fill him as he looked up at the towering structure. 

he almost gives up. he basically has, until he notices something strange. his balcony door is unlocked, and he always kept it locked for safety purposes.

tense, niki reaches out and slowly turns the handle. what greets him is certainly not what he expected. 

you sit on the balcony railing, hanging over the edge quite precariously with your feet swinging. one slight mistake and you would fall. 

you stare down at the passing cars, cloudy and dreary skies showing you it was soon to rain.

niki stares at you, and you turn around at the sound of the door to stare back, not a single word exchanged. 

then you finally break the eye contact, glancing down at your stilled feet. “i wasn’t going to do it.” 

he silently moves closer, hopping next to you on the railing as well. “okay.” 

you don’t see the tender way his eyes travel over you. your voice is quiet as you speak up, “you don’t have to say anything.”

“okay,” niki repeats. 

it’s not said in a sarcastic way. it’s not sad, either. it’s just..... soft. soft and understanding enough to make a blanket of comfort fall around you, to make it known that niki’s presence is here by your side.

suddenly, the rains starts and niki asks if you want to go down. you slowly nod and he helps you safely off the railing before opening the door for you guys go out in the rain. 

the rain doesn’t stop. 

and niki doesn’t stop either. he grabs your hand, dragging you along with him haphazardly. 

“where are we going?” you ask breathlessly. 

“out. like most people our age. we’re still kids.” 

“wow, i had no idea,” you mutter sarcastically. 

he holds back a smile of relief. good to know you were still your usual self. 

“you need a break. you’ve been so caught up in this case, you need to rest.”

“but-“

“come on,” he leads you on, “relax. it’ll give you a clear mind, so we can come back with a fresh start.” 

you’re hesitant until he pulls up at an arcade. “what if someone sees me? what if they-“

niki places a finger over your lips, silencing you. “we’re here to have fun like everyone else and not give a crap about anything else. now, are you gonna play or are you gonna get your butt kicked by me?”

a challenge was a challenge. 

you laugh at niki’s rambunctious side, yelling as he tries to cheat during competitive games and fight over the better toy gun. 

“just so you know, i technically won.” 

you playfully shove him, “in your dreams. you’re just saying that because you don’t want to-“

you get cut off by the loudest (and most embarrassing) grumble of your stomach. you both look down at your stomach. you look back up, petrified. 

niki almost cackles, “i guess that’s a sign.”

“it’s not my fault i fell asleep before eating yesterday,” you pout. 

“what do you want to eat?”

“anything. i’m serious.” 

niki watches with a fond smile as you quite literally inhale your food. 

“eat any faster, and you’ll make a new record.”

you flip him off as he laughs, putting more food onto your plate from his. you can only watch wordlessly, feeling your heart warm. after you finish eating, niki takes your hand again. you glance at him questioningly. 

“there’s one last thing i wanted to do,” he mumbles while avoiding your gaze. 

“how’s this one?”

you scrunch your nose in distaste at the sight, reaching to place red devil horns on niki’s head.

“i think this one fits you more.”

as he grumbles, you laugh. 

“fine, but i get to choose yours.” 

he ends up picking a frog headband for you—which you complain to no avail. his reasoning was, “you remind me of a frog. like the princess and the frog.”

you splutter, “but that means-“

“yes. i’m the princess.”

“obviously,” he adds. 

in the photo booth, you sit awkwardly. niki cocks an eyebrow. 

“i’ve never done this before, so…"

instead of teasing you like you originally assumed, niki only brings you closer. he wraps an arm around you while posing for the camera. you’re frozen, even as the countdown starts. you can barely manage a smile as the camera flashes. 

“what now?”

niki glances at the screen, “we still have three more pictures. what poses do you want to do?”

you’re at a loss for words. 

niki leans closer again. he makes a half heart with his hand as he looks at you expectantly. “how about a heart pose?”

“o-okay.”

you never felt so suffocated in that photo booth. and yet, you’ve never laughed harder. you’ve never been so happy in your life with someone else.  

“hey, this photo came out good!”

“but what happened to the first one?”

you both lean in to get a closer look at the photos that printed, and you end up feeling niki’s breath on your cheek. 

it was warm. it was nice to have someone so close to you and still feel comfortable. it was nice to know you were close enough to someone to feel that way. 

it was something you had never felt before. 

“..-y/n?”

“huh?” you snap out of your trance.

“i said, you can keep this copy.” 

you look at the pictures and then at niki. “what? no, it’s fine-“

“i said keep it,” he forcefully shoves the photo into your hand as he quickly heads over to the cashier to pay. 

you stand there for a minute, looking at the photos. you guys looked happy. you guys looked good…together. like you were a real couple, or something. you internally chide yourself while taking off your headband. what a silly thought, you brush off. 

on the walk back home, you feel utterly satisfied, humming as you match your pace with niki’s.

“when we arrive, i’ll let you in through the back, just to be safe.”

“whatever you say, mr. responsible.” 

he ruffles your hair and you swat his hand away in annoyance.

that night was the first night you’ve felt content. almost like you could stay here—like you belonged. you stare up at the dark ceiling, reflecting on the days events. 

“niki?”

you hear his bed shift. “yeah?”

“i just wanted to say thanks. for everything. you’ve been providing everything for me, all while helping me on my case. i’m grateful for everything. i don’t know how, but i promise to pay you back one day.”

“what’s with the sudden sappiness?” his tone is teasing, but light. he clears his throat to add, “but yeah, of course.”

“i dunno, i guess i’m just not used to this type of treatment back home.”

“what? what do you mean?” 

even in the dark, you can feel inquisitive stare on you. 

“i mean, i’m usually left on my own since my parents are working. and my friends, well, they’re nice and all…”

“but you don’t feel a true connection?” he finishes, and you roll over.

“yeah. i don’t really know what my friends are like in this world. who even are my friends? do i even have any?”

niki grimaces. 

“uh, yeah. i don’t know if they exist in your world, but have you heard of danielle? and haerin?”

“nope. what are they like?” 

he shifts again, and the bed creaks. “you see, i don’t really talk to your friend group. it’s nothing personal, i just don’t want to associate with them.”

“dang, maybe it really is just a me problem, in every life too.” 

you hadn’t thought about hanni and hyein since you got here. but danielle and haerin were two new leads. a new start, perhaps. 

now that you had more information from niki, you started your research again. specifically, insta-stalking. 

your specialty. 

niki hands you his phone with a suspicious look when you casually ask for it. you pray he doesn’t hear the sound of blood rushing in your ears or the pounding of your heart. 

as he goes to do his night time routine, you quickly tap on the instagram app and search up danielle’s name. it doesn’t take long for you to find her account since niki followed her. checking to make sure he didn’t come out of the bathroom, you scroll through her feed. 

and your heart stops when you see it. in the corner of a photo—a picture of her and haerin posing at school in front of their lockers. 

that’s your ridiculously expensive bracelet on danielle’s arm. you’re sure of it. 

you felt yourself grow nauseous as you quickly turn off niki’s phone as soon as you hear the door turn. 

“hey, are you okay? you look like you just saw a ghost..”

you blink and smile, peeking at him innocently, although the dread grows in the pit of your stomach. “huh? no. what are you talking about?”

“what were you doing on my phone?”

you look away sheepishly, “trying to see if i could call my mom?” maybe niki’s acting skills were rubbing off on you. 

“oh, and?” 

you shake your head, a fake grim expression plastered on your face. 

that night, you lay awake staring into the darkness. when you hear niki’s soft snores, you sneak over to his bedside table to retrieve the key. you know you shouldn’t, but you felt this was something you needed to do alone. 

you feel like you’re on the edge of the cliff, about to jump into the water. the adrenaline filled you, you were right there-

it was so close.

the next day, you have to pretend everything is okay. you smile when niki greets you good morning, even peck him on the cheek when he tells you he has to stop by the dance studio for the night. 

he visibly blushes, stuttering on his words, “w-uh, w-what was that.. for..?”

you shrug, “i’m just proud of you for getting your grades up. it’s your first time back dancing in a while so have fun, okay?” 

he nods, beaming as he squeezes your hand goodbye. as he leaves, your smile fades. it felt too normal. it felt too right to imagine having a life with niki, like this everyday.

and knowing what you knew now, it was wrong. it was wrong from the start, and yet you couldn't help yourself fall even deeper. you had to get back into the right mental state. you couldn't keep deluding yourself.

it was time to confront the truth.

you can’t believe you’re sneaking into through the school boy’s bathroom again. the locker key safely stored in your pocket, you find danielle’s locker. the same one from the photo she posted. 

this had to be the one. you can only hold your breath and hope as you unlock it. 

you quickly scramble through all the stuff, looking for the shiny bracelet. you don’t find it, but when you go to close the locker door in defeat, a crumpled up piece of paper falls onto the floor. 

you huff, taking it and opening it up. it’s a picture of sunghoon, you, and danielle, all smiling as you three posed for the camera. but it wasn’t just an ordinary picture—there was a big, red “X” scribbled over your face, with the words “finally done” written next to it. 

and hearts next to sunghoon’s face. 

horrified, you clap a hand over your mouth. 

during a break at the dance studio, niki doesn’t expect to open his instagram app and see danielle’s instagram show up on his recently searched. frowning, he taps on the account. he never cared to pay attention to danielle, so why was her account the last thing searched up? 

just out of curiosity, he scrolls through her recent posts. 

and then he sees it. something that is so hard to miss. it’s so strikingly familiar. 

he rushes home. when niki bursts through the front door, he doesn’t expect to find you missing. and when niki notices his old school uniform and cap gone, his heart drops. 

you sit on the floor next to the lockers  with your head buried on top of your knees. you’re sure you could get caught, but you don’t care. 

the crumpled picture feels heavy in your pocket. 

you stay there, staring at the walls until you see the moon shining brightly outside one of the windows. you haven’t eaten or drank anything the whole day. you’re not sure how long it’s been. 

“y/n!” 

great, now you were hearing things as well? 

furious footsteps stomp towards you.

“why did you leave without telling me? you could’ve gotten caught-it could’ve been dangerous?!”

“n-niki?” your eyes widen. 

before saying anything else, he pulls you up to your feet. 

“why would you come to school without me?”

for some reason, his words sting. you cross your arms, “what? like i can’t take care of myself?” 

he groans, “that’s besides the point! if someone saw you—“

“i don’t care! so why do you care so—“

a sound from down the hall cuts you both off. you turn to niki in panic and he curses. “the custodian comes on weekends to clean.”

you hold back a yelp as niki grabs your wrist and pulls you along in the opposite direction. 

he pushes through a door and turns to the left. you don’t stop until you’re inside the.. natatorium? 

“why are we-“

“there are no cameras here, unlike in the school building. i thought you would’ve known that.”

after he speaks, there’s an awkward silence. 

niki sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “well, are you gonna tell me?”

you feel the frustration flow through your veins, “and what about you? you tell me why i have to let you know my every location? why i feel like i can’t take care of myself, l-like a sick, old dog who can’t go anywhere or do anything? i’m sick of it all!” 

“you don’t understand,” his voice raises,  and you interrupt him, getting closer and closer to him. 

“you’re right, i don’t. i don’t understand why you helped me in the first place. you say that you barely knew who i was, yet here you are acting like you care! like you cared about the dead me!”

at this point, his face is so close to yours, you can feel your breaths mix as neither of you back down. 

“i do care! of course i care! about you, standing right in front of me!” he clenches his fists. your eyes linger on a single vein on his neck that sticks out due to the intensity. the fire burning in his eyes, your trembling voices, it all makes you falter. 

you don’t know what you asked. you know the truth. niki always cared—more than cared. he always went out of his way to search for you, like the day on the balcony and today. he wanted to find you, he wanted to have you in his life, 

you realize it now. to put simply, he wanted you. 

and this was the first time you felt wanted. 

you don’t know what else to do, so you lean in and close the gap to kiss him. and if anything, niki immediately pulls you closer to him. 

when you break apart for air, his dark eyes still staring deep into yours, you think he’s gonna lean back in again. but you hear a faint voice sound, growing louder. your eyes both widen. the janitor.

without a second thought, niki pushes you. 

he does it lightly, although it’s still enough to make you lose your balance, and for a second you stare back at him, betrayal evident before you fall backwards—

straight into the pool. 

your eyes just barely peek open in the water, and then there’s a splash accompanying yours a few seconds later. 

he easily swims to you, cupping your cheeks and bringing your lips to his once more. it was a much different experience from just a few seconds ago. 

you stay entwined like that together, eyes squeezed shut, until you actually can’t breathe anymore and you have to smack niki’s arm. you both rise to the top, heaving water and air. 

after a few seconds of coughing and gathering your bearings, niki’s raspy voice fills the air. 

“at least he’s gone. i’ve always wanted to do that.”

you roll your eyes, splashing water back at him in revenge for pushing you earlier. “seriously? after we got almost got caught? we could’ve drowned!”  

you splash him again, “also, you could’ve given me a heads up!”

he grins, wiping the running water free from his face. “and where’s the fun in that?”

you shake your head in amazement, “you’re actually an idiot. i can’t believe you, niki.” 

“an idiot who saved us from getting caught.”

after returning home together, you sit and enjoy the peaceful silence as niki dries your hair. your mind can’t help but replay the last few moments, from finding the picture at school to kissing niki, and then finally get pushed into the pool. specifically, the kissing part. 

growing sleepy at the soft and warm feeling of niki’s hands running through your hair, you almost don’t hear him when he says, “all done.”

you thank him and he looks around awkwardly. 

“what is it?” you squint at him. 

“well, i wanted to apologize. i didn’t mean to make to feel that way. i was just really worried about you, and i felt hurt you didn’t tell me why you snuck into school again today. did you not trust me? did i do something wrong?”

you soften, eyes falling to the floor. 

“i’m so sorry, niki. i didn’t mean to lash out on you. of course i trust you, i just wanted to do something for myself for once. without needing your or anyone else’s help.” 

you exhale, “the reason i left today was for this—“ you take the damp, crumpled picture and unfold it as best as you can. 

niki’s hands fall to his side. “oh god.”

“it was danielle. she took my bracelet and i-i think she wanted my boyfriend. i know it has to be her.”

“w-what? but how?”

you shake your head. he goes to hug you. 

you feel tears brimming at the corner of your eyes, but you won’t waste any tears on her. you pull back to look at niki, with a determined expression on your face. 

“you have to catch her and make sure they get what they deserve.” 

niki stares at you deeply, “are you sure? because if you are, i won’t stop.”

he wonders why you say you and not we.

at that, you falter. 

“no. i never be sure because she is—was my best friend and i will always hold that guilt in me. but you have to do something about it.” 

niki’s hold around you tightens, “and what about you?”

you smile, albeit sadly. “you know i can’t stay here, hiding away forever. i don’t belong here. i already existed in your world, and at some point, i have to leave soon. i can feel it.” 

it was the same feeling as when you first came here. that day you felt off. the feeling that you don’t belong anywhere, but this time, you feel fulfilled. complete. like you were ready to go back home. 

“it’s not something i can explain, but i know it,” you look at him with determined eyes. 

and he looks back at you with pained ones. 

niki is able to convince jungwon to get his dad to reinvestigate the case again. the picture is given up as evidence, and danielle and haerin are taken in. 

the day they confessed out of guilt, you and niki celebrate by sneaking onto your school’s rooftop. the same place where it all started.

it’s a cold and windy night, but you could care less about getting sick. because it was your last day anyway. 

you didn’t tell niki, but you had a good feeling—like the world was patting you on the back and saying, “you worked hard.” 

the two of you watch the stars, snuggled up and reflecting on how your lives came to be like this. wondering how far away apart your worlds were. 

you kiss niki’s cheek, wishing to remember the feeling of being in his arms forever. his scent, his touch, his warmth, you wish you could keep all of it. you smile at him, willing back the tears. 

“there was a reason i bumped into you that day, of all people. there was a reason you came into my life, and i came into yours, niki.” 

he bites his lip, “y/n... you changed my life. every day with you was better than the last.” 

if this was a dream, you wouldn’t want to wake up. you trace his face, so it will remain ingrained in your mind forever, even when you go back to your world. 

“what will happen when i leave?” you whisper. 

“how will you even get back home?”

you shrug, “i don’t know how, but i know that i will.”

niki laughs, “that’s the y/n i know.”

as he kisses you once more, a star falls across the sky. 

the next day, you find a ticket in your bag. a train ticket. 

you don’t recall having bought one, and you don’t question niki. you only ask him to take you to the train station.

while walking hand and hand, you reminisce on the past month or so. “will we still remember this once you go back to your world?”

your body trembles, “i don’t know.”

“then… will i ever see you again?”

you don’t want to meet his eyes, because you know you’ll cry. 

yes, you want to say. instead, you say, “ i don’t know.”

niki wipes a stray tear on your face. you don’t even know how you reached your stop already. 

“this is it,” he says. 

but neither of you move. 

“don’t worry, even if i don’t remember you, you’ll always be in my heart. we’ll meet in your world,” he reminds you while the tears start falling down both of your faces. 

“don’t forget that there’s another me out there to annoy you. you just need to search hard.” 

you sniffle, playfully pushing him away as you furiously blink away the tears that blur your vision. you needed to soak up the sight of him as much of him as you could.

“i promise i’ll find you again.” 

he holds onto you until the very end, until you slip out of his grasp once more.

crossing the platform into the train while giving him one last, slow wave was painful. the last thing you can think of is the fact that you never knew. you never asked for niki’s full name. his real one. 

you never knew niki’s name.

and then everything fades into nothing. 

that’s the last time niki ever sees you. the train passes by in a flash, blowing his bangs across his face while he tries his best to keep that fake smile on his face for you—all for you before you go. 

then, you’re gone. 

in those seconds as the train passes, niki knows exactly why he did it. why he helped you through all of it, through everything together. 

all because you were there in class. you never looked at him, but he looked at you. he saw all of you, everyday—even if you didn’t know it. all your quirks and habits that he couldn’t help but find cute. you made his days interesting. 

but he was the coward for never approaching you. that was his fault because one day, you weren’t there anymore. 

and he had to pretend like nothing happened. on the outside, that’s how it was. even if he felt the slightest connection, tiniest pull towards you, you were still strangers. 

you were strangers until you knocked into him on the train platform. 

niki had to be selfish. he thinks it could have been fate that he saw you again, but now he’s just left with the lingering regret and feelings. those memories flash past like the train does. they come and go in the blink of an eye- a split second. 

when the train is gone, niki frowns and wonders why he’s standing there. 

he also wonders why it feels like there’s a piece of his heart missing. 

after that, he attends your funeral in his world. it was an open funeral to everyone who wanted to come- classmates, friends, and him. niki didn’t even know you that well, but he get this unexpalaniable urge that he should go- he needs to go. he brings flowers and gets to see you one last time. 

when niki sees the picture of your serene face, he can’t help but get this sense of peace, like everything’s resolved. 

and then he’s free.

epilogue...

you sigh, trudging along the walkway on the way to work. looking at your surroundings, you were getting major deja vu. but at this point, you were used to having episodes like that. 

there were many, many times where some things simply felt so familiar. but it was like your memory was wiped and you couldn’t remember why. some times you had flashes of an adventure, a feeling of mystery, a boy. 

ever since some day in high school, it just happened. and from then on, you’ve always felt like something was missing. or wrong. you can’t tell. it became a part of you, to the point where you almost forgot about it. that feeling of misbelonging, being just out of reach. it’s strange, like a weird occurrence that makes you want to open your third eye or whatever to find out more.

even after graduating, it never left you. 

you being so lost in your thoughts, fail to notice when you bump into someone coming off the train you were about to get onto. 

“i’m sorry,” you quickly apologize, but you soon falter when you meet eyes with sparkling brown ones. weirdly enough, they draw you in. 

they were familiar, you’ve certainly seen them somewhere. the moment lasts for a while, with the two of you standing still in the middle of the passway, staring at each other.  

you slowly smile, extending a hand. “i apologize if i’m mistaken, but have we met before?”

he stares at you too, confused yet enthralled. 

“i-i think you may be mistaken,” he starts hesitantly and you begin to apologize. 

“are you sure?“ you quickly introduce yourself, “and you?”

you swore you were not such a desperate person, but you couldn’t help it, not this time and definitely not in front of this particularly alluring guy.  

“me?”

he takes a quick glance at you before taking your hand with a small smile. 

“my name is nishimura riki.”

first i wanted to say thank you for reading! this was a rough time coming, and i wanted to apologize for the long wait. this has actually been a wip of mine for years and i finally was able to finish it with riki after months and months of writing. this past year has been the worst one so far, but i'm just grateful to still be here. just feeling super appreciative for those who stuck with me and waited patiently. thank you. can't wait to see you guys again soon with the next oneshot (hint hint)!

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❛ 𝒊 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 ❜ — PSH

SUMMARY. Sunghoon doesn’t realise just how much he craves — how much he needs — your presence until it’s no longer there.

pairing. park sunghoon x fem!reader

genre. angst with comfort, fluff, one shot, friends to lovers

word count. ~ 4-5k

notes. inspired by this prompt here 🤩🤩 i’m so sorry it took so long to do i totally forgot about it 😭 BUT here is the friends to lovers with sunghoon 😮‍💨. ( gif divider by @cafekitsune )

𖤐 𓈒࣪ ᭡ ˖ one. 𝙞 𝙢𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 . . . 𖦹︎ ִֶָ ࣪ ៹

“SORRY, EXCUSE ME! COMING THROUGH!”

You stumbled across the ice rink like a newborn fawn, following no clear path, relying solely on your waving arms to keep you upright. Skaters passing by gave you a wide berth as you sped forward. Children watched as you flew by. 

You should have expected that you’d eventually ram straight into someone. You just weren’t expecting it to be him of all people.

“Ow...” you winced as you lifted your back off the ice. When you spotted a boy across from you, you gasped and immediately got up (or, at least, as fast as you could with your level of skill, anyway). “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! Are you okay?”

The boy barely looked affected, as if he was used to the sensation of falling. “I’m fine,” he responded quietly, before standing. It was like he didn’t just have a fully-grown teenaged girl slam into him.

It was that moment you got a good look at his face.

Park Sunghoon, the so-called ‘Ice Prince’ of Hybe High. 

He had a… reputation, one could say. With a face that seemed carved from marble and an aura that left one guessing, it was no wonder why he had so many girls pining after him. Paired with his status as an accomplished athlete—a figure skater at that—it didn’t take a genius to know how he had earned his title.

Except, things weren’t usual all that simple, were they?

Park Sunghoon was an ‘Ice Prince’ in every definition of the word: not only did he reign supreme on the rink, he also had a knack for driving people away with his cold stare and even colder tone of voice. (Or so, the rumours went.)

It was just your luck, you supposed, that you had to bump into him.

He won’t be mad, would he? You fretted. 

But to your surprise, he was just the opposite.

Instead of telling you to “Get lost” (okay, you had to admit you only had your mangas to blame for this expectation) or to “Watch where you’re going” (again— the mangas), he actually held out a hand to you.

“Are you okay?”

In that moment, you were glad you were on the ground, because there was no way you like stay upright if Park Sunghoon looked at you the way he was now while standing.

You were already hyper aware of his physical attractiveness after seeing him from school. But those minor glimpses you’d get of him during class (when he wasn’t absent for figure skating training) or from across the hall did no justice to his face up close.

As he looked down at you, eyes full of concern, and a ray of light shining down on him, you couldn’t tell if he was real or—as cliche as it sounded—an Angel from above.

Oh, have mercy on my soul, you thought. You hesitantly reached out to accept his outstretched hand— and, wow, how was it that his hands were just as beautiful as his face?

As he gently lifted you from the floor—no, really, he had basically pulled you up with his strength alone—you felt your cheeks heat up, despite the cold of your surroundings.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his tone of voice nothing like what you’d heard from your gossiping classmates.

“Yeah, I’m okay!” you squeaked.

In your embarrassment, you quickly tried to pull your hand away from his. But just as you did, you faltered and almost planted on your butt… again. Out of reflex, you immediately reached out to the closest thing to you.

And of course, at that moment, the closest thing happened to be one Park Sunghoon.

You didn’t know what was more surprising: that he actually let you hold on to him, or the fact that he put an arm around your waist to stabilise you. Just like that, the two of you remained staring at each other. The world around you was full of movement and chaos, but in that moment everything came to a stand still.

You felt heat bloom in your cheeks.  

That’s it, you thought. I’m dead. He’s killed me.

Sunghoon’s ears started to redden at the tips as you continued to stare at each other. After a moment, he awkwardly removed his arm—though not too fast that you would topple down—and scratched the back of his neck.

“Ah…” Sunghoon chuckled shyly. “Sorry about that.”

He offered you a smile.

His resting face was a sight in itself. But the sight of his smile, the small dimple that it revealed, and small fangs that peeled out from his mouth, had your heart spiralling out of control. If your classmates saw him now, there was no way they could call him cold. (And no way they would be able to resist him.)

“I should be the one apologising…” you giggled. “Or rather, I should be thanking you, I guess— you saved me from potentially embarrassing myself more than I already have. I guess skating isn’t really my thing.”

Before Sunghoon could say anything you smiled at him. “But you’re really good. I’ve seen you quite a few times.”

It was about a month ago: your younger sibling decided that they wanted to take up ice hockey, and joined the local club. Since your parents were busy during some of their practices, you ended up chaperoning them. Simple enough, but boring.

Until you witnessed something magical.

You happened to look over to the side, just in time to catch a skater launch into the air. You watched in awe as the skater spun mid-air, before landing elegantly in the ice below— leg extended backwards, gliding like a swan across a lake.

You were definitely oversharing at this point, but you had already shared an awkward moment together. What was another on top of it?

You were half expecting Sunghoon to seem weirded out by your confession. But in fact, he didn’t seem surprised at all.

“I know,” he replied. 

You blinked at him. “Sorry?”

As it turned out, you weren’t as slick as you thought.

Apparently, Sunghoon had known for a while no that you were an avid fan of his, and knew who you were as a result. But you couldn’t really find it in you to complain, seeing as it brought you closer to the boy. Who would have known that you would end up drinking hot chocolate with the Ice Prince Park Sunghoon as if you were best buddies.

“You know, it’s kind of funny how this is our first time talking despite knowing each other for so long.”

You had been attending the same school together for a year, and had quite a few classes together. But you’d never even uttered a hello to each other before. Now, here you were.

Sunghoon chuckled shyly. You decided right then and there that you would never grow tired of seeing his smile—the dimples, fangs, and all.

“I’m not a very social person,” he admitted, looking down at his lap. His ears were flushed red, his fingers tapping against the styrofoam cup that held his hot chocolate. “I’ve never been good at making friends… especially with girls.”

To say you were surprised at the confession was an understatement. There was no way you’d imagine that Park Sunghoon of all people—who people would say was as cold as the ice he skated on—was just… well, shy!

“Wow, really? That’s a surprise…” you took a sip from your hot chocolate.

Sunghoon hummed. “It probably would be to someone like you… You’re so social and you get along with everyone. You have so many friends…”

You raised your eyebrows. Were you dreaming or did Sunghoon say that with a twinge of envy? Him? Envy you? That was a completely foreign thought. (There was also the fact that he somehow observed you enough to know you were a social butterfly who got along with everyone— but that didn’t bother dwelling on that fact for too long.)

“Well, you’re not bad at making friends either,” you assured the boy, patting his shoulder. “I mean you managed to talk to me, right?”

Sunghoon blinked. “I guess you’re right...” He turned to you with a shy smile. “But you’re pretty easy to talk to, so that’s probably why.”

“So, you’re saying I don’t count, huh?” You asked teasingly.

Sunghoon shook his head. “No! That’s not what I meant…”

You laughed. “Don’t worry, I know what you mean.” You took another sip of your hot chocolate before looking at him. “In that case, why don’t we just make it official?”

Sunghoon cocked his head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

You smiled.

“Let’s be friends.”

𖤐 𓈒࣪ ᭡ ˖ two. 𝙞 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 . . . 𖦹︎ ִֶָ ࣪ ៹

ONE DAY, IN A STRETCH OF BOREDOM, YOU QUICKLY PULL OUT YOUR PHONE TO SEARCH FOR SUNGHOON’S CONTACT.

Perhaps you were coming off a little strong, considering you two have only been friends with each other a week by now. But you really couldn’t help yourself. Something about him was so endearing to you. Especially when he made that confession the

You flopped onto your bed and opened up your messages.

You: hey!!! how are you going?? hope you’re doing okay! You: but anyway! just wanted to see if you wanted to meet up before school tomorrow? 👀

You tilted your head. Does this seem too clingy?

You quickly added another text to the first one.

You: i thought it would be nice since we have class together

You bit your lip as you watched the screen, waiting for the typing bubbles to appear. When the ‘read’ notification popped up, you felt your heart quicken. But seconds turned into minutes and he still hadn’t said anything back.

You pouted. Did I use too many exclamation marks?

Dropped your phone, you turned to lie on your side. You just hoped you hadn’t come off as too familiar— after all, the last thing you wanted to do was hold the poor guy victim. You wondered if he thought you were strange…

But just as you were debating whether to send another text (‘Or not! It’s cool if you don’t want to!’), your phone pinged. You instantly sat up.

Ice Prince: no problem Ice Prince: sounds good

You stared. You blinked. Then you burst out laughing. 

He’s a bit of a dry texter, isn’t he? You thought. Now that, I saw coming.

If he were one of your long-time friends, you would have spammed him with random questions. (As the extrovert of your group, you usually found yourself carrying the conversations.) But, seeing as you’ve only really known him for a few days, you decided to have mercy on him.

Until you would eventually fill his world with chaos.

You: yay!! see you then!! ☺️ You: oh and goodnight by the way!

You smiled when you saw his reply.

Ice Prince: See you Ice Prince: Goodnight

You giggled to yourself as you closed your messages with Sunghoon and began to text your other friends. At that moment, you had another goal to add on to your list of things to do.

Mark my words, Park Sunghoon! you thought to yourself resolutely. One day, I will get you to use an emoji!

You greeted the next morning like a new friend.

You had nothing but good dreams the night before. And now, you were properly rested for a day of school—and, of course, hanging out with your new friend Sunghoon! If your parents noticed anything about your chipper mood, they didn’t say anything. But regardless of their odd looks, you didn’t care.

Nothing was going to bring you down from cloud nine.

You hummed as you grabbed your phone off the bench, bidding your family goodbye as you rushed out the door. Just then, you got a notification.

Ice Prince: I’ll be at the benches behind X block

You smiled as you flicked back a text.

You: okey!! I’m on my way to school now! so see you soon! ☺️

With that you skipped away. You couldn’t think of any other day where you had been so excited to go to school—if there ever was one, to begin with. You found yourself enjoying every little thing around, not taking it for granted: the buzz of the morning rush, the feeling of sunlight on your skin, the sight of freshly fallen flowers lining your path.

Today was such a good day. And it only got better when you caught a glimpse of a certain someone from a far.

How does he look so good just sitting there? you wondered.

You observed the way the sunlight managed to reflect off of him at just the right angles to illuminate his features and the wind gently brushed through his locks in a way you suddenly wanted to try for yourself. It seemed some people were just born to be loved by nature. And Park Sunghoon was one of them.

When you finally managed to shake yourself from your reverie, you bounced up to the boy, who didn’t seem to feel your eyes on him. (You supposed he was used to the sensation.)

Feeling mischievous you decided to approach him from behind. Taking quiet steps, you felt yourself smile as you got closer. Then, before he had the chance to realise your presence, you put your hands on his shoulders.

“Boo!”

Sunghoon jolted in his seat. He whipped around to face you, confusion over his features. Then—at the expense of your heart—his lips slowly curled into a smile.

“You’re here?” he said. “You could have just yelled out to me, you know?”

You giggled. “That’s not as fun!” Without waiting for an invitation, you plopped yourself down next to him. “So! What are we doing?” You tilted your head up to the sky to mimic the position he was sitting in before you disturbed him. “Are we cloud-gazing?”

“Huh?” Sunghoon blinked. He shook his head. “No. I was just thinking.”

You blinked back at him. The two of you blinked at each other, before you found yourself bursting into laughter. “Pfft—”

“You were ‘just thinking’?” you repeated with a smile.

Sunghoon nodded, causing you to laugh even more. “Why?” he asked, confused as to what it was he said that you found so funny. “What is it?”

“I mean, it’s just… who does this—” (You posed melodramatically, like a character on a movie poster.)  “—when they’re just thinking?”

“Ishhhh…” Sunghoon scrunched his nose, before standing up. His hands were balled into cute fists as he looked down at you. “Yah! How can you tease me like this? Huh?”

But his little ‘reprimand’ did nothing but make you giggle even more. For someone who was known as an ‘Ice Prince’, he had a lot of adorable habits.

“Okay, okay.” You patted him on the arm, trying your best to ignore how muscular they felt under your hand. “I know, so calm down now, yeah?”

Sunghoon sat down beside you, and the two of you enjoyed a moment of silence.

“By the way…”

You turned to face Sunghoon. “Yeah?”

You noticed that Sunghoon hadn’t lifted his head to look at you, instead lowering his head to hide the blush forming across his face. At that moment, your heart melted, endeared by the sight of him.

“I was thinking… did you want to walk home with me after school?”

Your eyes widened. But seconds later, you smiled.

“Sounds good!”

𖤐 𓈒࣪ ᭡ ˖ three. 𝙞 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 . . . 𖦹︎ ִֶָ ࣪ ៹

TIME PASSED IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE. Days flew by, then weeks, and then a month. And during that time, you only grew closer to your friend Sunghoon. Sunghoon, who you could now barely remember what it was like before meeting him.

You never would have thought you’d be attached to the hip with the infamous ‘Ice Prince’, but here you were, walking among a crowd of eager-to-leave students, shoulders almost touching with how close you stood together.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel a little slip of joy when Sunghoon had been the one to ask you first. And now, you two had made it a tradition of sorts to walk home together every day.

You hadn’t ever needed someone to walk you home before. But you would be a fool to turn down an offer from Sunghoon.

As such, you were planning to make the most of it.

“You got along with the others okay, didn’t you?” you asked, referring to the group of friends you had introduced to him today.

Sunghoon nodded with a smile. “Yeah. I even got Beomgyu’s number.”

You smiled cheerfully. At least it wasn’t Ning’s or Yunjin’s, you thought. You couldn’t really explain why, but you felt a little twist in your stomach at the thought of either of them (the only females, coincidentally) in his messages. It was an unwarranted feeling—one that you didn’t have any right to—but you couldn’t help it. 

Whatever it was, you would ponder it later. For now, you simply wanted to enjoy the scenery. Flower petals falling from the trees, twirling in the air as they fell gently to the ground, lining your path with pink omens of romance and love.

Ha, you thought, I think I’m getting delusional.

“I’m glad you got along well with them,” you said. “Look at you go— you’ve already gotten new friends with little to no effort required. You’re a lot more sociable than you think.”

Sunghoon looked at you with an unreadable expression. “Really?”

You nodded eagerly. “Of course!”

Sunghoon smiled gently. “You know, when I first met you, I thought you were kind of strange.”

You burst out laughing at the sudden admission. “Oh, really? And what about now?”

“Now?” Sunghoon hummed as if he was in deep thought. When he turned to you, there was a glint of mischief. “Now I realise… you really are pretty weird.”

You faked a scandalised gasp. Slapping the boy hard on the shoulder, watching as he started to laugh at your reaction, you couldn’t help but giggle. If he was teasing you, that meant he considered you to be comfortable enough to joke around with. So, you couldn’t be too annoyed at him.

Especially when those dimples of his poked out. 

Gosh I really am weak, aren’t I? you thought.

“It takes one to know one, dummy,” you responded.

Sunghoon chuckled. “Then I guess we’ll be weird together.”

Your eyes softened. If, right then and there, someone were to say you had honey dripping from them, you would believe them. Otherwise, there was no explanation for how bright and golden the boy in front of you appeared at that moment.

“Sure,” you said. “Together.”

Yes two of you walked in a comfortable silence for a few moments after. But you had decided at that moment that you wanted to delay your parting— even if just by a little bit.

“You mentioned that you don’t have training tonight, right?” you asked Sunghoon. The male nodded in response. “Well, there’s an arcade nearby that just opened recently. Wanna check it out?”

Sunghoon smiled, his fangs peeking out as he did. “Sure.”

“Cool.” You then surprised Sunghoon by bolting off. “Race you there!”

“Aish—!”

You giggled as you heard the boy curse before taking off after you. You didn’t care how many looks you got on the way. The sound of your laughter mixing together as you raced down the pavement was music to your ears.

Your new favourite song by far.

That afternoon, you had spent all of your time laughing in the arcade, spending hours like they were nothing but minutes, living solely in that moment. After several games against each other, you two found yourself before the claw machine, counting the last few of your tokens.

“Ahhhh!” You groaned in frustration when you missed the cat plushie you had your eyes set on for the last five minutes. “I just needed to get a little bit to the right!”

Sunghoon chuckled from beside you, watching as you almost tore your hair out. You had only meant to spend one or two tokens on the plush, but after gradually getting closer with each try, you insisted that you “might as well go all the way”… only for you to get nowhere at all.

Now you were tokenless and left feeling like you wanted to smash open the machine.

You sighed as you turned to Sunghoon. “Looks like I’m done for today,” you said with a laugh. “What do you want to do? You still have a few tokens left.”

Sunghoon smiled. “Move.”

You blinked as he gently nudged you aside so that he could get to the claw machine controls, wordlessly slipping a token into the coin slot.

“Ayeeee,” you drawled out, crossing your arms over your chest. “Didn’t you see me before? It’s obviously rigged. You shouldn’t waste your tokens on this.”

But it was too late. Sunghoon was already starting to operate the machine, a smile on his face as he nudged the claw so that it hovered over a penguin plush. You immediately perked up.

You wanted the penguin plush at first, but after seeing how difficult it would be to retrieve it from the corner that was stuck in, you chose to play your cards smart and opt for the cat plush. But while the car plush was much easier to get based on its position, you still failed. So the fact that Sunghoon boldly went after your first option piqued your interest — if not a little ire.

You meant down to his eye level, your heads bumping together slightly as you watched the claw make countless turns to get an optimal angle.

“Someone’s confident.” 

Just as you said that, Sunghoon hit the button. You watched as the claw descended, taking the penguin plushie up in a pinch, before slowly making its way over to the dropping bay. 

Imagine your surprise when the penguin made it all the way.

You gaped as Sunghoon retrieved his newly retrieved plush from the tray, before fluffing it right in front of your face.

“Wha— but how?” You stuttered out. “No way…”

Sunghoon simply laughed, his dimples poking out from the force of his smile.

“Confidence,” he replied.

You remained frozen in place, still unable to process what had just happened. But what shocked you most was what happened next. Before you could say anything, Sunghoon held out the plush, offering it to you with a tint of red blooming across his cheeks.

“Here,” he said. “You can have it.”

You blinked in surprise, an eruption of butterflies setting off inside your chest. Slowly, you reached out, your fingers brushing against his as you took the penguin plush from his hands.

“Thanks, Hoon,” you said, using the nickname special only to the two of you.

“Like it?” he asked, watching as you softly squished the plush, your eyes filled with wonder.

You held the plush to your chest. You smiled at him and nodded.

“I like it.”

I like you.

𖤐 𓈒࣪ ᭡ ˖ four. 𝙞 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 . . . 𖦹︎ ִֶָ ࣪ ៹

PEOPLE OFTEN CALLED SPRING THE SEASON OF ROMANCE. Of pink flower petals, pink as the cheeks of lovesick youths; of blossoming love, nurtured by the warm encounters shared between two people hopelessly lost in each other’s orbit.

But not everyone was meant to experience that feeling for themselves. And you were one of them, it seemed.

“I like you.”

The words fell from your lips as easily as the petals of the cherry blossoms from the tree above you. His eyes widened at your sudden confessions, his head turning to face you, no longer occupied with watching the shifting clouds hanging over your heads.

Your voice is soft. Full of hesitance, yet honest all the same. But he doesn’t make a move to reciprocate. He could only stand there, frozen as the ice he held dear to himself.

Maybe you shouldn’t have said anything. Maybe you should have gone on pretending that you didn’t feel anything for him. Pretend as if Park Sunghoon — one of your closest friends — didn’t make your heart burst like the kaleidoscope of colours at the storefront of a flower shop.

But there was no denying it. You couldn’t lie to yourself… and not to him, either.

“What?” he asked, his voice weak with shock.

You swallowed heavily, the weight of your words squeezing down on your chest.

“I like you,” you repeated. “I have for a long time now.”

You stood there for what seemed to be an eternity of silence. Sunghoon looks at you, his eyebrows furrowed in a deep frown, his shoulders tense. And at that moment, you probably already knew what was coming.

“I… I’m sorry.” Sunghoon lowered his head, unable to look at you. If you listened closely, you could hear the sound of shattered glass — the remnants of your heart breaking at his words.

You forced a smile, despite how much it pained you to do so. “It’s okay,” you said. “It happens… I just wanted to let you know.”

Sunghoon but his lip. “We can still be friends, though… right?”

You nodded. “Of course.”

That’s what you told him. But truth be told, you didn’t know how you could go on, acting like nothing had happened. Acting like you didn’t wish to be something more. And so, that afternoon, when you walked home alone — needing time to yourself to wipe the tears that fell down your cheeks as you mindlessly dragged yourself to your bed — you could only think of one thing.

That from this moment forth, you would do what needed to be done to save your own heart. Even if it meant breaking it at the same time. So when Sunghoon texted you later that night, budding you sweet dreams, you didn’t reply.

Unaware that his own heart was breaking just as much as your own.

Sunghoon stared at his message, waiting for the text bubbles to appear on your end, which would signal that you were about to respond. But as minutes passed — and soon, an hour — and there was no sign of reciprocation on your end, he finally turned off his phone and dropped it on his pillow.

He sighed deeply, running his hands through his hair.

Your confession had completely caught him off guard. He hadn’t expected that you felt anything more for him than friendly affection, considering how easily you endeared yourself to others. How easily you smiled, how easily you made others laugh, how easily you broke down any walls around their hearts….

Himself included.

But he didn’t know what it was that he felt for you. For a long time, he barely had any friends to call his own — acquaintances maybe, but never friends. And then you came out of nowhere, literally crashing into his life, with the bold proclamation of being his friend within hours of knowing him.

He didn’t know how you did it. How you made him so curious about you that he woke up every morning waiting for your texts, or anticipating the sight of your smile.

He didn’t know what you were doing to him. But he didn’t want it to change. He wanted you to always be there with him, to share all his moments with him, small or big, good or bad. But now…

One last time, Sunghoon checked his phone.

No answer.

He closed his eyes. He hoped with all his heart that this was temporary. That tomorrow morning, when he woke up, he would see your name as a notification, bidding him good morning with that smiley emoji you seemed to favour so much.

He hoped — more desperately than words could say — that he didn’t just lose you forever.

But he started to see the signs.

The next morning, he didn’t hear a word from you. When he got to school to your usual meet up spot, you were nowhere to be seen. And when he got to class, taking his seat next to your empty desk, imagine his surprise when he found out you weren’t coming to school.

“She said she was feeling sick,” Yunjin told him, surprised. “She didn’t tell you?”

No. You didn’t. And Sunghoon didn’t know what was worse — that he was the only one who didn’t know, or that he was the only who knew the real reason why you weren’t there.

You were avoiding him. And it only became obvious when things continued the next, and the next day after…

Slowly, but surely, you were slipping from his grasp.

Slowly but surely, he was losing you.

One day, he realised, you would stop being there altogether. One day, you would go on and find new people to surround yourself with. New people to tease, new people to spam with cute texts, new people to go to the arcades with…

And a new person to like. Perhaps, more than him.

Sunghoon felt sick at the thought of you with someone else. The thought of you confessing to them the way you did to him. And he was starting to realise why.

“Hey, Yunjin.”

Sunghoon stopped by the girl’s desk as soon as the bell rang.

“Hey, what’s up?” she asked curiously. 

Sunghoon pointed at the notes she was currently on the middle of putting away in her bag. The notes she was asked to copy down and give to you so you could catch up from home.

“Those are for her, right?”

At your house, buried under your covers, you had no idea of what was happening. Completely oblivious to the desperate boy on his way to your house, running as if his life depended on it, you curled into a ball, your limbs feeling too weak to leave the cocoon you made for yourself on your bed. 

A knock on your bedroom door causing you to lift your head.

“What?” you asked in irritation.

“Don’t you know how to check your phone?” Your older brother, Heeseung asked. “One of your friends from school is here saying that they were meant to give you your catch up notes. But you weren’t answering.”

You sat up in your bed. Checking your phone, you saw several missed calls from Yunjin. You groaned. You quickly texted an apology before kicking your sheets off your figure and rushing to the bathroom to fix your appearance.

Despite having taken a shower not too long ago, you still looked utterly miserable, and the wetness of your hair only added to the drowned rat look you were sporting, with your oversized white tee shirt and old gym shorts.

You sighed as you quickly fixed your hair as best you could. Hopefully, Yunjin wouldn’t care too much.

You trudged to your door, slamming it open to see Heeseung standing there with raised eyebrows.

“Are you sure you wanna go down looking like that?” he asked.

You rolled your eyes. “Who cares? It’s just Yunjin.”

Heeseung’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “When did I say—?”

But before Heeseung could finish, you were already pushing past him. You really didn’t have time for his nagging, especially when he had already been doing it for the last few days, urging you to get out of your room and even trying to drag you out by force. He might have thrown you into the back of the car to drive you away from home — where you had been locked up for days now — to go anywhere with fresh air if it weren’t for your mother scolding him.

With a tired sigh, you made your way downstairs. Since both your parents weren’t home, it was completely quiet, and you could hear your footsteps echo as they padded across the tiled floors of the kitchen to your front door.

You cleared your throat as you opened the door.

“Hey, Yun—“ your eyes widened when you saw who was at the door. “Sunghoon?”

Sunghoon smiled tiredly, panting, his shoulders rising and falling as if he had just ran a mile.

“Hey.”

You gaped.

“I— what— why—?” You couldn’t even make out words in your shock. At that moment, you remembered what Heeseung said about your appearance and gasped. “Wait, I’m not dressed—“

You almost closed the door in Sunghoon’s face. But before you could even move, he had already reached out to grab your arm pulling you to his chest. Your eyes widened at the feeling of his arms enveloping you, covering you in warmth.

“Hoon…?” you asked, your voice shaky.

Sunghoon took a deep breath. And only then, you realised he was crying.

“Hoon? What’s wrong?” you asked. You tried to pull away and look at his face, only for him to tighten his grip on you.

“I like you.”

You froze in place.

“What did you just say?”

Sunghoon took another shaky breath, his forms hovering as he held onto you as if you might disappear at any moment.

“I didn’t realise it until now… and I’m so sorry it took so long,” he whispered, his voice shaky and hoarse. “But I like you. I like you a lot. And when you were gone I missed you like crazy.”

He pulled away, looking you in the eyes.

Your heart hammered away in your chest. We’re you dreaming? Or did Sunghoon really just say he liked you — you, of all people. The whole time you spent lying in bed mourning your broken heart, he had been feeling the same way for you that you did for him?

“I…” your voice shook as you pulled away from the hug. You looked into his eyes, wet from tears. Those tears were from you, you realised. You did this to him. You made him cry. “I’m so sorry…”

Sunghoon sniffled, shaking his head. “It’s okay.” His hands, still shaking from his raging emotions, slowly made their way up your arms, before cupping your face. “Just tell me… please tell me you haven’t moved on.”

You shook your head, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Never.”

“Then be mine,” Sunghoon whispered, almost as if he was praying.

You didn’t say anything in return. Instead, you pulled his tie down, so that his lips crashed against yours, fitting like two pieces on a jigsaw puzzle. You let your lips move against his own without any thought but the feel of his mouth on yours. Of the feeling of him holding you to him, like you belonged there on the first place.

And you did.

You were a fool to think otherwise.

A few minutes later — after Heeseung had chased Sunghoon away, claiming “kids should be in bed by now” — you lay on your bed to find a new message from Sunghoon.

Hoon: can’t wait to see you again

You giggled.

You: you only just left 😆

Hoon: i know just can’t help it

As you read his next message, a warm feeling wrapped around your heart.

Hoon: i miss you 🤍

youtuber au; when your fans ship you together — part one

yeonjun x gender neutral reader

bullet point fic, part two will be written

when you and yeonjun, two of the biggest youtubers on the platform, start getting shipped by your fans it’s only inevitable you catch feelings for one another

part two soon

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

✰ you started a youtube channel in your second year of university, you were having trouble making friends and didn’t want to attend the parties so you made the internet your safe space.

✰ after you posted a compilation of your best attacks and scores of your favorite video game, your channel blew up and it became one of your main sources of income. college was rather expensive so you needed it.

✰ through making a channel you made several friends who are also youtubers, but there was one you only admired from afar: choi yeonjun.

✰ you often competed against him to be on the trending page, but more often than not got beaten. you were sure he wasn’t even aware of your existence. which is why you never bothered to reach out to him.

✰ that was until a certain video was posted

✰ in a video of yeonjun reacting to fanfiction one of his fans had sent him a fic of you two in a romantic setting, it didn’t quite occur to you that your fans shipped you up until that point.

✰ you were flustered at the fanfiction and at yeonjun’s reaction to it, he was flushed pink as he nervously laughed his way through the story.

✰ the entire twitter timeline was in flames and you were drowning in the attention, not sure what to do with the increasing amount of followers you were receiving all of a sudden

✰ you were scrolling through the trending tag #YEONJUNYN, swallowing down your nerves as you saw more and more fanart of you two and edits of every time you mentioned yeonjun and vice versa. you hadn’t realized you talked about him as much as you did.

✰ as you were trying to scroll past the obscene amounts of nsfw fanart fans were quickly drawing of you two, a dm notification snapped you out of your haze

✰ soon after that you two would text regularly the week before your planned collab.

✰ they had a bit of flirty undertone, but maybe you were just reading too much into it? time would tell once you met up for your collab.

__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

can tumblr stop showing me fanfics about things im no longer interested in 😭😭 im not even following tags related to them wtf

guys it turns out if you wanna have fun and be a fun and interesting person you like have to fill your day with fun things and not just rotting in your room …… need a moment to process

[ sakusa kiyoomi ]

considering your boyfriend made it pretty clear on several occasions that he hated valentines, you weren’t surprised he made no move to even contact you during the day. you were slightly disappointed due to the fact that you loved the day, sure, but it wasn’t fair to place your disappointment on him when you knew what you were getting yourself into due to the years of friendship before dating, so you didn’t dwell much on it.

you had asked previously if you two would meet tonight and when he mumbled a response about how he would probably be practicing late, you took over your co-workers shift to save yourself the boredom of being home alone while consecutively giving her a chance to see her partner, earning multiple ‘thank you!’s and a promise that she will take your shift whenever as she rushed out, prompting you to smile.

you loved valentines.

you didn’t have a solid reason on why you did, but you didn’t need one. you loved being surrounded with red heart balloons and roses wherever you walked and you loved the glee on people’s faces as they celebrated the day with their beloveds. it made you feel warm every time despite your plans or status and you couldn’t help but smile as you watched a boy blush furiously as his girlfriend handed him flowers, giggling quietly with a love-dazed face.

the obnoxious bell ringing against the glass door made you turn to the costumers walking in, your smile widening just slightly as you saw osamu and atsumu bickering as they approached the counter until their eyes landed on you and widened just the slightest, atsumu gasping. “yer working today?!”

“yeah,” you mused, placing your chin on your palm. “you’re both spending valentines together?”

they both shot you a glare that only caused your grin to widen, placing their usual orders down on the system either way. osamu grunted. “he finished his date early and went over to have a mental breakdown at my restaurant.”

atsumu gaped at him for a few seconds in pure betrayal as you let out a quiet snicker before he shot his twin a harsh glare. “at least i had plans!”

osamu gave him a glare back. “they are out of town, you little—“

“please don’t scare my costumers away,” you retorted, cutting them off. they both huffed, avoiding eye contact before their eyes landed back on you and atsumu raised an eyebrow.

“what about ya? plans ended early?”

“there were no plans,” you shrugged casually, adding extra syrup into osamu’s drink while catching the discreet way his eyes lightened up at the action. “kiyoomi hates valentines.”

atsumu frowned. “but ya love valentines!”

you hummed, sliding osamu’s drink over. “so? i don’t have to spend it with him against his will to be happy.”

osamu stared at you with furrowed eyebrows and a frown that matched his twin’s. “yer too nice. so, where is he today?”

you shrugged. “told me he was practicing.”

they both shared a look before looking at you and speaking in sync. “when do you get off? we’re taking you out.”

you smiled as you slid atsumu’s drink over, stating that the drinks were on the house when they attempted to pay before telling them that you only had a few minutes left. as you finished the last bit of your shift, you could hear them checking with their partners that it was okay and you couldn’t help but silently melt at how cute their relationships were as you waited for the last costumer to leave and closed up, shrugging your jacket off before calling out for them.

the rest of the day was nice. the three of you bought over-priced cupcakes and ate them in a dark playground, half the time spent with you laughing in amusement while they argued while the other half was spent with the three of you gossiping about drama suna had shared. they even bought you a red heart-shaped balloon and you almost teared up as you gleefully accepted it, thanking them frantically as they walked you to the door of your apartment building.

“can i do something before ya leave?” atsumu grinned mischievously and you snorted as you nodded, interested to see what his plan was. he simply got out his phone, making you stand between the twins before he snapped a selfie of the three of you, making sure to capture osamu’s small smirk, the balloon and his poked-out tongue before he beamed. “sent!”

you raised an amused eyebrows as osamu snickered. “you sent that to kiyoomi?”

“yeah, told him we stole ya.”

you laughed as you bid them your goodbyes and made your way up to your joined apartment, humming your favorite song under your breath softly. you assumed your boyfriend was still practicing, so you were pleasantly surprised when you unlocked the door and the lights were all on, your boyfriend’s shoes in their usual spot.

“kiyoomi, i’m home!” you called out after a sleepy yawn, expecting to get a simple ‘in our room!’ or anything back. instead, your boyfriend walked out of the hallway with furrowed eyebrows and a frown.

“you were with the miyas?”

“hm? yeah.” you hummed, placing your stuff down on the coffee table, too sleepy to notice the way he was practically sulking. “they came before my shift ended and decided to take me out. when did you arrive?”

he huffed as he dragged himself over, strong arms pulling you into a tight hug as he buried his face into your neck. you smiled softly, your hands moving to lock into his hair as you hugged him even tighter. he hummed softly. “i missed you, how was your day?”

“it was nice,” you murmured quietly, enjoying the warmth he provided. “i love valentine’s day.”

he froze. you obliviously continued.

“the café was super busy, but it was nice seeing everyone on dates, you know? there were a lot of roses as well and it’s just so heartwarmin—“

he pulled away quickly, eyebrows furrowed deeply. “you… you love valentines?”

“hm?” you blinked. “yeah? it’s my favorite holiday.”

“you love valentines?”

you let out a small laugh at how cute he looked when he was confused. “of course i do. everyone knows i do, kiyoomi, how did you never notice?”

he tugged his hands into his hair. “how did i not notice— why didn’t you tell me you loved valentines?”

you shrugged calmly, not seeing the issue, and your nonchalance only seemed to make him even more distressed. “you hate valentines so i didn’t see why i should mention it, you know? i didn’t want you to force yourself to plan anything or do anything for me.”

he stared at you for a few seconds before he fell back on the couch, burying his face into his hands and mumbling muffled words before he let his hands fall down and frowned. “you’re an awful human being.”

you were too amused to take offense as you shrugged a few of the thick layers you wore off. “why am i an awful human being, my love?”

“how can you not tell me you love valentines? i would have taken a day off and i would bought you those stupid overpriced flowers and those overpriced chocolates you would hate and we could have spent the entire day together and—“

“you don’t like valentines.”

“yeah, but i love you.” he huffed. “i love you and i want to make you happy.”

“i’m always happy with you,” you assured, slightly entertained. “i promise. why do you seem more upset about us not spending this together than me?”

“because i was under the impression that you also hate valentines,” he muttered as exhaustion finally seemed to take over, his drooped shoulders and pout causing the almost 6’3 professional athlete to seem like a child. you took the seat beside him and he immediately laid his head down on your lap, huffing. “i didn’t know you liked it. i would have planned the best day if i knew you did, i promise.”

“you keep missing the point, my love.”

“what’s the point of anything if i ruined our first valentines together?”

“you’re such a drama queen,” you snorted softly, running your hands through his soft hair as he blinked sleepily. “the point is that i don’t need to celebrate valentines with you to be happy, kiyoomi, and you not buying ‘overpriced flowers’ won’t make me love you any less. i knew what i was getting myself into when i started dating you, i don’t want you to change and i genuinely don’t mind.”

his cheeks flushed, but he still sulked. “whatever, i’m taking you out next year.”

“or… we can stay in and order takeout? how’s that?”

“i’ll buy a stupid bouquet too.”

you grinned at his sleepily grumbles. “you can buy me a stupid bouquet then. you can even buy me stupid chocolates too, how’s that?”

“i will,” he mumbled determinedly, eyes finally shutting. “i love you so much, i’m sorry.”

“i love you and you have nothing to be sorry about, my love.” you promised, leaning to kiss his forehead. you only got a soft snore in response, your grin widening.

you truely couldn’t wish for a better valentines.

—

pouty sakusa supremacy :p anw valentine ended 22 minutes ago for me but yolo ! hope you enjoy this one :)

BURY ME FACE DOWN — DAINSLEIF

✦ PREVIOUS ✧ QUEST MENU ✦ NEXT

★⋆. ࿐ PAIRING — Dainsleif x Princess!Reader

★⋆. ࿐ SUMMARY — In a land where the gods' gaze did not fall, there are those who dream of dreaming. Khaenri'ah, a nation who did not follow any archon but bowed to a king, was home to those who longed for a world without the weight of Celestia looming over their shoulders. But dreams end, and nightmares can take root— especially once their hidden corner is put under the microscope of the gods.

★⋆. ࿐ WARNINGS — Lore & theory based world building. Pre-Cataclysm Khaenri'ah. Readers visions are meant to be dysphoric & chaotic.

“The end of the Drekaöld’s is nigh, just as you predicted.”

You looked up from the book you had your nose buried in, facing your tutor who had been sitting across from you. It was as if he was waiting for the right moment to tell you what you already knew. 

You rose an eyebrow, gently closing the book in your hands, “Yggdrasil has yet to fail me, Master Frode. My father and the sage's may not believe in my sights, but you of all people should know they are true.”

He gave you a flat look, used to the slight smugness you radiated at being told another one of your sights were ringing true. From the first time he'd watched your face go blank and seen your hands rapidly scribble images onto a blank page, he knew you had been blessed by Yggdrasil. Ever since you were a babe, really. Born under the tree of life just as the first Bough Seer had been. 

Frode was one of the greatest scholars that Khaenri'ah had. It was the reason he taught not just you, but your elder brother Finn, and it was the reason he was your father's regent. His family started off as scribe's for Khaenri'ah’s first king, and knowledge was passed down with each generation. Who better to take the throne if something were to happen to the royal family than those in the Alberich clan? One day, his son could possibly be regent to Finn. 

“The legacy of the Bough Seer has been spoken throughout generations,” Frode let out a sigh. “It isn't that your father and the sages don't believe in your gift. It is that they are afraid of it.”

They were. The sages never wanted to hear talk of what sight the tree of life gives you. Their fear of Celestia not only had your nation underground and far from their gaze, it had the people pushing to get further away. Time, money, and resources were being dumped into bringing machines that could drill to the inverted surface, but there wasn't much progress with it. All in hopes that one day the people could see the sun shining again. 

Khaenri'ah had always been shrouded in darkness– from the minute that Celestia had dropped a nail on their ancestors in Sal Vindagnyr. Above the surface, tragedy struck those seeking refuge, and underground everything they had worked for was smashed to pieces. Up until finding the small corner of the world where they couldn't be found, the odds of survival were not high. 

The land they resided in now was built on blood, loss, and sheer spite to keep living without Celstia breathing down their neck. All because the ancestors had learned certain truths and began to rely on each other rather than the god’s bounties. 

“Are you calling my father a coward, Master Frode?” your lip tugged upward, a teasing smile gracing your lips at the startled look on his face. “You'd be correct, I suppose. The people do not have the slightest clue a Bough Seer was once again reborn, even though in the past they were once the king's greatest asset.”

Very few kings of the Eclipse Dynasty were fortunate enough to have a seer by their side. They were born once every five hundred years, and they were blessed by Yggdrasil with a sight that allowed them to see glimpses of what was to come. While most foresaw how the harvest would go, and if natural disaster would strike, it was still better than anything the sages could guess. With a Bough Seer, they were practically useless. 

However, your father chose to ignore your gift. He depended on the sages rather than you. Maybe it was because he feared the wrath of gods that you weren't supposed to believe in, or maybe it was because every time you were around him, all he could see was your mother. 

When you told him that Nidhug, Khaenri'ah’s true guardian, was going to fall ill and pass on, he refused to hear you. The sages believed his time would come far in the future. He was in perfect health, and there was no need to worry. 

But Nidhug was old. He had been around since the beginning of Khaenri'ah’s time. Your ancestors spent nine days fighting him, nine weeks gaining his trust, and nine months taming him before they could even think about touching the soil for anything other than farming. A dragon who had lived for thousands of years, alone until your people had found him. 

The dragonheirs were few and far between, eventually wiped out due to their untamable nature despite countless attempts to tame them as well. There was no creature who could take his place.

Weeks ago, you'd seen his fate. The way he barely moved an inch when approached, his labored breathing, and how long it took him to pry his eyes open when he was spoken to. He was going to die, and Khaenri'ah would no longer have its greatest defense. 

“I'm sure the meeting will be over soon,” Frode let out a sigh. “Sir Dainsleif will be able to take you to see him.”

You shook your head, “You could always accompany me as well. Unless—”

“Father!” A child's voice called out, the rapid patter of tiny footsteps echoing off the wall. “Look! Look what Master Gustav taught me!”

The boy was no older than seven, his hair styled to match his fathers– the top section pulled into a ponytails the rest laid down flat. You thought it was cute, how he always tried to look and act like the older man. Although he took after his mother Svana, with his tanned skin and blue hair, he did have Frode’s eyes. 

The white haired man went to scold his son for interrupting when you spoke up instead, “May I see too, Kaeya?”

It was almost as if he just realized you were there as he came to a stop in front of his father. His eyes widened, almost dropping what he had in his hand and reaching out to grab Frode’s arm. He froze, glancing at the elder man with a look that screamed for help. Kaeya had always been shy. Immediately embarrassed if he spoke too loud or gained unwanted attention. This time, it was because he didn't notice you, the princess he always saw but had barely spoken three words to. 

Frode nodded at the boy, and Kaeya held out a small wooden animal, one that looked to be carved and whittled by his own hand. Even though it lacked major details, it held just enough to make out what it was.

“Master Gustav said a dragon protects us,” Kaeya forced himself to speak. “He taught me how to carve the wood. I made it for mother, do you think she’ll like it?”

You smiled, gently taking his hand in yours before looking over his creation with more thought than before. You nodded your head in response, “I think she’ll love it. Do you think you could make one for me too? I can take you to see the real dragon in return.”

The thought of seeing Nidhug had Kaeya immediately nodding his head in agreement. He wanted to go now, but didn't dare push his luck. Frode was not too pleased with the idea of his son being around a beast, but if anyone could keep the dragon in line, it was Dainsleif, the captain of the Black Serpent Knights and your personal guard. 

“I wish to be a knight like you when I get older,” Kaeya absentmindedly told Dainsleif as the three of you walked the path to the sage's temple. 

He was stopping to pick up rocks and trying to catch butterflies as you went, forcing you and Dainsleif to stop walking long enough to drag his attention back to the task at hand. Both of you were patient, knowing he was young and easily distracted. 

“Is that so?” Dainsleif questioned him, slight amusement in his tone. “It will take a lot of training, bravery, and strength to become a knight.”

Kaeya nodded, already knowing this from the minute he was given the wooden sword that he had sheathed at his hip. He was determined, despite knowing how difficult it would be. He was too young to truly understand now, but he would be giving up the chance at an education, at learning what he would need to know in order to one day be a regent. The young one seemed to think he could do both, and no one had the heart to tell him that wasn't the case. 

There were days when you and Dainsleif would spend time at the Vaxandi library, going through books so he could learn to read better, or when you'd take him around the kingdom and explain the histories of the buildings that stood tall and proud for many millennia. Because his training as a knight took precedence over studies, Dainsleif was not as educated as other nobles. 

“I know,” he responded, proud of his decision. “One day I'll be strong enough to protect the princess too.”

He sounded so determined, like he would weather any storm to make his words ring true. Resilience and determination like that was needed for a knight, and as long as he kept that in mind, he could do it. He was already learning about conduct and forms from his master but had yet to train with even the wooden sword. 

Dainsleif could respect that, telling him he had complete faith in him as you all walked along the fields of mist. You could tell you were getting closer to the temple as the fog got thicker. Kaeya could barely see in front of him, reaching up to grab your hand before he could trip over rocks on the footpath. The way was lit, making it slightly easier to see as Dainsleif led the way. 

It didn't take long for the three of you to reach the temple, the sages outside allowing you to pass through without question. You didn't even greet them as you headed for the cave where Nidhug resided, knowing you wouldn't be able to mind your manners. You warned them this was going to happen, and they refused to listen to them. But, that was how it had always been. 

Kaeya let out a soft gasp when he saw the giant creature curled up on the ground. It was his first time seeing anything like it, and he almost couldn't believe his eyes. You frowned, approaching the beast slowly. 

You knelt down by his head, Kaeya letting go of your hand and taking several steps back when the dragon opened his bright green eyes and looked at you. Nidhug let out a sharp breath, closing his eyes again as you reached out to pet him. 

“Greyið,” you ran your hand over his dark scales, and he leaned into your touch. It was true. Nidhug was not well, his breathing was labored and he barely had the strength to move. “The beast’s last breath unbinds the old ways.”

Kaeya looked at Dainsleif, confused at your words. The knight simply shrugged in response. He was used to your way of speaking when it came to your sights. You were never direct, always vague or speaking in a sort of riddle. He figured you meant with Nidhug’s death, it would be the end of an era. Instead of giving Kaeya an answer, Dainsleif placed his hand on the small of his back and gently pushed him forward.

You turned, waving the boy forward. He apprehensively approached, crouching down next to you. He reached out as well, petting the creature as if it were a common house pet. His nose scrunched up at the texture felt against his fingertips– rough and uneven. 

A sigh left the dragon, at least you assumed that's what the change in his breath was. Silence fell over you as three of you spent the dragon’s last moments with him. Kaeya didn't understand what exactly was happening, but he didn't dare break the silence. He stayed in his spot, showing Nidhug the same amount of love that you were giving to him. 

When his labored breath came to a halt, a single tear trailed down your cheek. Nidhug was much more than a protector. He was a symbol of your nation’s separation from the Archons and Celestia. Now that he was gone there was no longer anything standing in their way. The Drekaöld had come to an end, the age of the dragon ending sooner than expected. The Black Serpent Knight's time was beginning, and something was telling you the strength of them combined was nothing in comparison to Khaenri'ah’s guardian.

Fire. Your hand furiously moved as you drew smoke and ash along the wall. Destruction. Despite being unable to make out clear details, the pit of unease that settled into your stomach told you that the ruins you were seeing were that of your nation. World… forget me. You paused, taking your free hand and wiping away the charcoal dust. You couldn't make sense of what you were seeing, what you were hearing. It didn't add up.

A land without sun. Khaenri'ah. The nation powered by the sólkerfi device, right? Wrong. Another land without natural light. But if not Khaenri'ah then where? Was there another nation who used an artificial sun? What did they have to do with anything? Was it war between us and them?

Field tillers. It was more clear now. Field tillers?…and the monsters that the Black Serpent Knights kept at bay, invading this other land. But, why? We have no qualms with anyone but Celestia. Taking on the gods seems unlikely, at least currently. What next? What happens next?

Death. Not in this strange land, but home.  They waged war? Or was it us? But what reason do we have? It’s unclear, fuzzy. Who died? Father? Brother? The knights who vowed to protect us in times like this? Death. Death of who, of what, of where? Khaenri'ah, right? … No answer? Tell me what happens. 

Khemia. Poison. Khemia? What is that? Unsafe. Gold. Make it make sense. Connect the pieces. None of them fit. It's made an even bigger puzzle. Why are you doing this? No time? Me or you? It doesn't matter. I’m afraid I don't understand. Don't tell me to be quiet. 

Blood. Below and above the surface. No, no, this isn't right. Speak clearly. What do you want to say? It's never this blurry, it's always so clear. It doesn't make sense. Did I do something wrong? I didn't mean to upset– what? Not my fault. Of course it's not my fault, you're the one confusing me. 

Sky Nail. Celestia awakens. The Archon War? Is it still ongoing? Why is that our concern? It's not. We have nothing to do with it. Do we? We don't. But why did they wake up? No time. I understand that.

Archon. Wrath. Arrogate. This is too much. Stop, stop, stop. What are we laying claim to? Why are the Archons mad? Because we don't worship them? Why do they care? They've cared about nobody but themselves for thousands of years. Yes, I agree, you should be angry with them too. Seems the legends are true. 

Gold. Poison. Downfall. It's out of order. Why is it out of order? Are you telling me you're dying? You were poisoned? No, we wouldn't let that happen. We can't let that happen. We won't let that happen. We can eclipse Celestia, but you will always shine bright. Shine bright. An Archon who protects you… interesting. I–

World… forget me. Out of time. 

“I thought I’d find you here,” A voice cut through the sound of erratic breathing and chalk dragging against stone. But the words fell on deaf ears, you were much too lost in your own head. You were frantic, running the chalk down into loose grit, desperately searching for another. 

The newcomer held one out for you, watching as you worked along the wall with nothing but a flickering lantern as your light source. Just like always, he silently watched until a sharp breath passed your lips and the chalk clattered against the floor. You stood there, mumbling nonsense under your breath. He couldn't make out a word you were saying, but he could see your mouth moving. 

“This…” you trailed off, absentmindedly wiping the black powder off on your nightgown. “This is bad. Not good.”

He approached you, lightly placing a hand on your shoulder. You jumped, not realizing he was there. Your heart was racing, much like your mind as you tried to piece together the broken puzzle. 

“Dainsleif,” You exhaled slowly, trying to calm yourself down. “What are you doing here? It's late.”

A light chuckle left him, his blue eyes shining with amusement, “I could ask you the same thing, elska. Walking around without a guard? What would your father say?”

He could always find you here, especially after the day you had with losing Nidhug. He had a feeling you'd be getting your next sight soon, although he didn't realize it would be this close to the one that was just fulfilled. 

You rolled your eyes, “As if he’d ever know. He’s much too busy discussing matters with the sages and preparing Finn to take the throne to give me one ounce of his attention. Plus, these are royal grounds. No one would ever be foolish enough to make an attempt on my life here. Now, don't evade the question.”

“Well then what of Frode, what if you were hurt on the way?” he prodded, earning a flat look from you. He sighed in defeat, “Alright, fine. If you insist on knowing, I came here purely on instinct. From the looks of it, you should've called on me before coming here alone.”

He glanced to the wall, which had been drawn on for years. This was the biggest piece you'd ever done, and what the picture held was concerning. He'd never seen such darkness and violence depicted in one of your drawings. He felt uncomfortable looking at it for too long. 

“I haven't made complete sense of it,” you admitted, following his gaze. “It was all choppy, blurry. Barely comprehensible.”

He frowned, focusing his attention back on you, “You need to rest. You can figure it out tomorrow.”

But, sleep would never come. After Dainsleif escorted you back to the palace and bid you goodnight, the only thing you could do was toss and turn. The images you saw earlier plagued your mind, concerning you to the point where you couldn't close your eyes without seeing the jumbled mess of all of it. 

By the time the moon’s position went from miðnætti to åtta– midnight to eight– you hadn't slept a wink. Instead of waiting for your handmaiden to help you get dressed, you got ready for the day by yourself and made your way to the Höggomur Quarters where Dainsleif resided. 

You knew he'd give you an earful for not waiting, and for storming into the Black Serpent Knights wing as if you did it all the time. People would talk, and Halfdan would never let either of you hear the end of it. 

Halfdan swore he was a romantic, and that he was perceptive when people had feelings for one another. But whatever he thought about you and Dainsleif, he could forget it. Even if Dainsleif did reciprocate your feelings, you were a princess and he was your guard. The sages would never approve of such a relationship, let alone your father. Halfdan thought the two of you were imbeciles– blind to how you felt about each other– and he couldn't fix stupid. However, he could push and prod. 

Which is exactly what he went to do as soon as he saw you in the halls. But, you were dead set on finding Dainsleif as soon as possible. You'd been up all night, your mind running in circles as you tried to make sense of it all. 

“Do not start,” you warned him, holding up a finger. “Where is he?”

Halfdan, who had a ghost of a cheeky smirk on his lips, gave you an amused chuckle in response, “He’s just now getting ready. Someone kept him up all night.”

Your mouth parted in shock, offended at what he was insinuating even though you both knew it wasn't true, “You mind your tongue, Sir Halfdan. Tell him to not keep me waiting or I will leave without him.”

“You think so poorly of me,” the man in question approached you, a small hint of a smile shining through his feigned annoyance. “Did you even get any rest?”

You pursed your lips before you evaded the question, “We need to get going.”

The slightly unamused look in his eye turned into one of irritation. Your disregard for your own self care was the bane of his existence, especially when you had yet to make sense of one of your sights. You were stubborn, you always had been. Once you set your mind to something, there was no changing it. It was something he both appreciated and hated about you. 

With a facetious smile in his direction, you walked towards the exit of the headquarters. He was quick to follow, falling into step with you in no time. There was a comfortable silence that fell between you, the walk to Yggdrasil’s location taking less time than you thought. 

As the two of you drew closer, an anxious pit set in your stomach. It grew with each step, the looming feeling of something dreadful pressing into your shoulders. It was almost as if he could tell, because the moment it almost became unbearable, he turned to look at you.

“The inteyvat fields will be ready soon,” he informed you, a light smile painting his lips. “I believe I promised to take you.”

Despite yourself and the turmoil you were fighting, you let out a small laugh, “I believe that you do, every year if I recall correctly.”

He remembered when he first became your guard. He was fresh out of training, eager to do his duty. As bright as a star– if not as bright as the moon. It was also the first time he'd seen you cry. That day had been sour from the minute you woke, aware that not only was it the day of your birth, it was the day of your mother's death. As a new life breathed air under the Yggdrasil tree, another was lost. 

Even though you wished to be alone, he disregarded your words and refused to leave until you stopped crying. He had the idea to get your mind off things, a simple stroll that led you the furthest out of the kingdom that you had ever been. A place that your former guard refused to let you go. The Inteyvat fields in the heart of Pilos Path. He promised to bring you every year as a reminder that even though a flower had been plucked from the ground, it remained intact. Much like the memory of a soul who has departed from the world of the living will never be forgotten as long as there were those who remembered. 

Every year you visited since, you often thought about entering Pilos Peak and seeing what was on the other side. Would it be everything you ever dreamed? Would the sun emit real warmth? Were the stars as bright as the stories told?

Neither one of you had seen real stars before. Because deep under the ground of Jarðríki– Teyvat– and between that of Óþekkturíki– Inteyvat– was a kingdom with a bare sky. No real stars, or a real sun. Just a real moon. 

While above the surface offered another beautiful light moon and thousands of stars, according to the legends, it was all believed to be fake. You may never feel the warmth of the Teyvat's sun or the chill of the night, but you could always dream. You once told Dainsleif this dream. Whether it was to see the world above the surface, or the real moon below, you wanted to see the world. Khaenri'ah just so happened to lie perfectly between both Teyvat and Inteyvat.

While there was no direct path to Teyvat, there was a portion of Khaenri'ah that did not belong to the world. It leads further down, into a world that your people dared not explore. At least, not yet. Alchemists and researchers were working on perfecting their machines to make headway, and only the best of adventures and the royal guard would be sent in. Meaning one day you would have to say goodbye to Dainsleif, as he was the Rökkrinu Sverð– the Twilight Sword– the captain of the Black Serpent Knights.

Not knowing if you would ever see the man you considered your closest companion again one day also filled you with dread. But all the hard work he's done, all the time and effort he put in would be paying off, and you knew that you'd never be more proud of anyone when the time came. That was your reasoning for continuing your birthday tradition once you had stopped hating it– you never knew which birthday would be Dainsleif's last to spend with you. 

Now, as the two of you came to a stop in front of the Yggdrasil tree, you wondered if that time was nigh. Your eyes scanned the markings you had left behind last night, seeing them more clearly under the moon’s light. 

You thought there were pieces to a puzzle that wouldn't fit no matter how hard you tried. But, looking at it now, you could see where all the pieces lied. Your mind was no longer buzzing with confusion and was clear of the fog a sight always left you in, and it was much easier to work out the order of everything. 

A stranger, someone new to the land who would bring a power that would not only cause war between Khaenri'ah and another nation, it would also lead to Khaenri'ah's downfall. Celestia would once again awaken, once again wipe out your people to keep you all silent. Afterall, the best way to keep a secret was to make sure the other party could never tell it. History would repeat, and your nation– your people– would be lost.

You swallowed thickly, turning to Dainsleif, “I must speak to Master Frode.”

“What is it?” He questioned, not missing the terrified look in your eye despite how well you tried to cover it. You could've fooled anyone else, but not him. “What did you see?”

Tears stung the back of your eyes as you forced yourself to look up at him. Concern was written in his expression, wildly searching your eyes for an answer that you were hesitant to give. You could never be clear with your answers. Not that you didn't want to, but you weren't physically capable of doing so. You had to pick all of your words wisely, and the words you chose as you grabbed his hand filled him with dread.

“Promise me,” your mouth ran dry as you choked back the tears threatening to spill over. “Dainsleif… promise me that you will hold my hand as the walls come tumbling down.” 

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WITH ONE FINAL STATEMENT, YOU WERE HIS

Zhongli x Fem!Reader 4.7K words Content Warning: Implied Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Platonic!Guizhong & Morax, Xiao lmao, Mentions of the Archon war, Mute Traveler, Reader has an Adeptus name, My horrible gramma

Summary(?): So, I decided to make an alt genshin account and through inspiration of the Liyue archon quest- this takes place during the rite of parting, in which Zhongli sends the traveler to collect the Cleansing Bell from an old friend. And Soon relives his memory with said old friend.

Further: I gave more lore to the cleansing bell, I couldn't find much information about it in game but if anything is wrong or not culturally correct, let me know and Im more then happy to change it. For purposes I'll be using Aether as a placeholder for the traveler.

Zhongli, up until this point, had been quite hands on with the ongoing preparation of the upcoming Rite of Parting, its the reason why both Aether and Paimon had been so taken aback by the mans sudden hesitance to continue with the proceedings.

Instead of approaching head on and indulging a bargain before realizing he'd forgotten his mora once again- as he'd done before, this time, Zhongli had sent the two on their way to meet with what he'd proclaimed to be 'an old friend', alone.

A Bell, he'd mentioned- they were meant to be collecting a bell, a bell that for some reason required a trip all the way to the Wangshu inn.

Paimon had been quick to mention her suspicions to Aether on their travels there, that she really thought Mr. Zhongli just wasn't willing to make the trip.

But on arrival at the inn, and in meeting with said person, that suspicion was quickly thrown out the window, in which a new theory was set in place. Zhongli was undoubtedly terrified of this woman.

A beaming yet soothing laugh sounded the balcony of the inn as the information was relayed to the unknown woman, your eyes alight with mischief at the duos words and it was slowly becoming clearer why Zhongli was so weary to meet with you.

“Oh so it was Zhongli who sent you, hm? He’s quite the bossy one isn't he.” Your expression fluttered with a glint of something quite fond, and then to one of humor. You were definitely someone to be reckoned with, that was clear from your embellished outfit to your stunning features and well tended hair. It wasn't until Aether had glanced down to the vision attached to your clothes that he found himself ogling a little.

"Well, by the mention of his name, I'd guess it was about time I was to give up my possession of the cleansing bell." Your expression seemed to drop just slightly, a saddened yet longingly content gaze capturing your face. "I assume thats what you're here for?"

Aether's head nodded as the words left your mouth, to which you found yourself sighing. The sound was bittersweet but quickly swept away by the soft wind that brushed against the 3rd floor of the inn. It seemed the wind mourned with you too.

"This bell hold's great significance to the development of Liyue. I think more importantly It holds great significance to me." You seemed to suddenly be lost in the memory of your experiences, eyes boring straight through the traveller and his companion as you spoke. "Were you aware that this bell has been through countless generations? No? This little piece of metal has seen the prospects of war and felt the elation of peace more then any other person in Liyue has. Its older then the building we stand on."

"Wow, is everyone in Liyue as oddly knowledgeable as Zhongli and yourself? You both seem to love talking about the history of Liyue.” Paimon suddenly interjected.

“Knowledgeable is one way of putting it. I guess i just take interest in the historical arts.” Your tone had once again shifted, this time taking on the mischievous ring it held before. Aether once again shifted his eyes to his traveling companion, who seemed as equally taken aback by the lady before them. You were a roller coaster of topics and Paimon was beginning to become overwhelmed by the atmosphere. Zhongli was odd enough but you were making it a lot harder to keep up.

“Can we just get the Bell already! What are you even doing at the Wangshu inn anyways?! You knew the bell was needed for the Rite yet here you are, chatting away!”

The way Paimon had quickly become overwhelmed had humored you, and you found yourself chuckling at her nature. "My reason for being here is quite simple- I'm here visiting a friend. The rite is precisely why I chose to be here in the first place. Lets just say, this friend isn't taking too kindly to the news of our late archons passing."

"Fine." Paimon huffed, "Fair enough." and with an extended hand she grunted, "The bell."

Your eyes dropped to the little fairy's extended hand for a moment, a smile gracing your features at her attitude. “How about this," You bid. "I give you the Bell and in exchange you deliver a message to Zhongli for me. Tell him to put his pride aside and visit an old friend would he?”

Paimons face was practically red at this point, stomping childishly at the demand. She was quickly become fed up with your roundabout attitude. “You're seriously gonna make us set up a date for you and Zhongli to hang out in exchange for the Bell!? We’re not match makers you know!”

To which your laugh sounded loud over the balcony, her words amusing you as the realization dawned on you. This little thing is a little slow isn't she. “Oh sweet thing believe me, I wouldn’t need to set up a meeting with Zhongli through mutuals. Lets just say, Zhongli and I meet quite frequently. No, this friend is someone far more special then I, and unfortunately someone that’s quite hard to get through to. I tried to calm him today but it seems like the only person who can truly set his mind at ease is Zhongli himself.”

“You meet with Zhongli quite… frequently? Then deliver the message yourself!" Paimons anger was finally getting to her, a feat which Aether had picked up. You'd noticed that throughout the conversation the boy had been silently laughing to himself, finally taking a step in with a chuckle to lay a deterrent hand on Paimon's back, to which she sighed "Fine. we’ll deliver the message.”

“Exceptional." You declared. The two watched as you wandered off for a moment before returning with a well ornamented bell, shaded a black and golden ombre. It was a beautiful peace of art that was carefully handed off to Aether with a gentle hand. "Then you best be on your way. Be sure to send off my message and do take care of the bell. Like I mentioned, it holds great significance to me.”

The few days following the encounter with the strange woman, the traveller and his companion had experienced what could only be described as true chaos, but after a long and tiresome battle, and the astonishing news that the man they'd been helping was the Geo Archon himself, the two finally found themselves reveling in the settling peace of the city.

The current ambience was that of content, and the people seemed to be a little less tense now that the Rite of Parting had came and passed. The city had found its most still moment in weeks and the traveller found that atmosphere to be something to soak in. That was until a high pitched screech disturbed said serenity.

Aether's eyes widened as he turned to glance at his companion, who was suddenly seething through her teeth at something in front of her.

"That-! That-! Oooh!" Glancing off towards where Paimon was looking, it was then Aether noticed two distinguishable figures walking side by side through the undisturbed harbor- the man they now recognized as the former Geo Archon, and the strange but pretty woman in which they'd briefly encountered at Wangshu inn.

The boys mind couldn't help but wander to a state of intrigue, curious as to how the two knew each other, let alone enough to be enjoying a quite personal stroll around the harbor, but ultimately decided to let the curiosity fizzle and allow the two peace away from disturbance. All until Paimon's seething little figure dashed straight past him and towards the two conversing figures.

At this, Aether was quick on his feet, following his little friend with wide eyes.

“‘The friend I refer to is not myself,’ Paimon's ass! You did just want us to set up a date for Zhongli and yourself!”

Paimon came to a stop in front of the two, Zhongli's eyes darting towards the two with his usual carefree pleased smile, while you, on the other hand, seemed a little more peeved by the interruption.

“Oh Traveller, Paimon, a pleasant surprise indeed.” Zhongli's voice was as smooth as silk, no different from his usual charms. Notably, Zhongli had purposefully disregarded Paimons anger, probably aware that she was less then happy with the both of them at the moment.

"First, you," She pointed an accusatory finger towards Zhongli, "Make us run all over Liyue for your own funeral. Not even dead may Paimon add. And then you-!" This time her finger was directed towards you. "You lied to us! You really were making us play matchmaker!"

Paimon ended her statement with crossed arms and creased brows, to which Aether stood close behind rubbing the back of his head with an apologetic smile towards the two.

At this, you laugh, smiling towards Paimon with what she regarded to be a usual charm for you. “No little one, I really did mean it when I said that Zhongli and I met quite often. The message truly was for the benefit of a friend.”

“Correct," Zhongli interjected with a smile. "I visited Xiao at the request of Y/n here, It seemed she was right, he really did need the company. This current walk is unrelated to your previous conversation.”

“What, so you two are just taking a 'friendly walk’ around Liyue for the hell of it?”

At this, the two smiled at each other with glinting eyes.

It was silent for a moment as Paimon digested the information presented to her and it was then she finally came to her conclusion. These two truly were odd. But on further thought, Paimon thought about how odd you seemed. You were friends with an Adeptus, nae- a Yaksha for that, close enough to be contacting him without issue at Wangshu Inn, now walking around Liyue with the former Geo Archon, and more importantly- you were the one in possession of the Cleansing Bell- an extremely ancient and sacred piece of Liyue's history. Who were you?

“Okay, but by ‘meeting’ Paimon hadn't imagined you meant nice little evening strolls! She thought you meant business meetings! For work! If Paimon wern't mistaken paimon would think you two were dating!”

“Dating?" Zhonglis voice was humorous as he chuckled towards the girl. "Well I sure’d hope so, considering we’re married and all.”

A silence befell the four, both Zhongli and yourself smiling with content and mischief, and the latter two both staring along with wide eyes and dropped jaws.

“Married!?….” Paimons gaze towards Zhongli was as sharp as knives. "So you're telling me you both are married?! And neither of you thought to tell either of us?!" Paimon thought about it for a moment before her eyes went wide at a thought that graced her, and with a small voice she whispered to Zhongli. "D-Does she know?!"

Zhonglis eyes glanced down, a knowing look plastered his face and a smile gracing his soft features. “Paimon, Traveller, I'd told you the cleansing bell was an important part of Liyues Adepti parting traditions but had I ever told you the story and the significance of the Cleansing Bell?”

At this, the two shake their heads.

“Well, the bell is quite a special sentiment in the history of Liyue.

In ancient times, specifically times of the Archon war, the bell was notoriously known to only be given to those in which Rex Lapis himself held a great amount of trust in. It was used as a means to cleanse the mortal realm, and with such power, came the need for a trusted individual to guard it.

"You can't hold possession of that thing forever." Ghuizhong's voice was light against the still air of Guili Plains, the two walking side by side on their way towards a town not too far from the main city. There was a war coming, and in turn business to be done.

"It can't be trusted on anyone else. It's too important. It holds the power to cleanse the mortal realm, and in the wrong hands... well."

"The wrong hands?" Guizhong chuckled in dismay. "You have people you can trust with your life, but no one you can trust with that little bell?"

"It's... significant to me."

Morax's tone was final and at this Guizhong looked sideways, eyeing the expression of the man beside her as they walked. He seemed tense, jaw clenched and eyes glowing a slight golden color. She realized that maybe he'd had an experience before hand, a negative one that lead to the betrayal of trust and maybe even the loss of a life.

That was the moment Guizhong realized that the bell truly wasn't just a bell, at least not to Rex Lapis, and maybe pressing on it wasn't intelligent. She was Rex Lapis' advisor, which meant she knew his temperament and his boundaries. This definitely seemed like one.

Though what wasn't a boundary...

"Alright... But who's to say you can't find someone. You and Acestia seem close."

"Guizhong, stop that." For the first time on this short trip, Guizhong truly laughed.

"What? Just pointing out a fact."

"I don't want to hear this again. You're delusional and quite annoying."

Once again she laughed.

"Guizhong please, I won't hesitate to leave you here."

Rex lapis held the bell in his position for hundreds of years, never trusting anyone enough to hand off the possession to guard. Sure he had people he loved- trusted in battle- trusted with his life. But the bell wasn't just a matter of spears and willpower. It was a matter of serenity and eternal peace. Morax's polearm clashed against that of your own, grunts sounding as you spun around, gliding your weapon against the handle of his own until it fell free from his lock and ready for you to charge again. Morax grinned at your efforts, proud of the way you'd freed yourself from a dire situation without hesitation.

"Good job, smart and quick, don't let yourself be cornered." He commented.

Finally he let off, letting his pole arm hang low as indication that he was pleased with your work for today. "This is a war Acestia, you may be a Yaksha so you may be one of the strongest, but anything goes in war. You must be ready."

With a swift nod, you bowed your head low in respect and smiled. "I understand, and I appreciate the sentiment Lord Geo."

Morax stood for a second, arms low by his side, pole arm firmly between his hand, upper body on full display as he stared down at your bowing form. His hood had fallen during the sparring match you both had indulged in and sweat gleamed his body as a result. You stood quietly, awaiting a dismissal but it never came.

It took a moment, but finally he spoke. "Acestia. What is it you're fighting for?"

Without a moment between, you spoke firmly. "You, Rex Lapis."

"No." His voice was firm, purposeful. And for that your head snapped up, polearm drooping besides you as you glanced on in confusion. Morax looked upon your furrowed eyebrows and noticed how innocently pretty you looked in that moment. Hm. Then he clarified. "What is it you're fighting for."

You let the question digest for a moment, blinking up at the archon with doe eyes as you thought about the answer. What were you fighting for? It took a moment to find your voice, but soon you'd straitened, your illustrious outfit shifting with your bold movements.

"Me? Well, I guess I'm fighting for peace- fighting for an era of serenity. For prosperity and safety to all whom inhabit this land.” Morax observed the sudden glint in your eye as the words escaped your mouth, a response he’d noticed had been pondered upon for quite some time. “I don't want the people I protect to suffer anymore. When I made a contract with you, I made a contract with Liyue- No, a promise. To protect this land and bring tranquillity to this generation, and every generation to come. I do fight for you Rex Lapis, because I fight for Liyue."

Rex Lapis seemed surprised… yet content at your words. It was a response he hadn’t been expecting, but a response he was satisfied with nonetheless. It was the moment he’d realised you’d truely come a long way from the cowering soul he’d found, to one of his most prized Yaksha.

The moment of stillness kept you on your toes, ciphering his expression with a clouded mind, pondering the idea that maybe you’d been just a little bit too passionate in your response. But he finally nodded in approval, and turned his head to the side, indicating that you were dismissed and free to leave as you pleased. Taking the signal, with a shallow bow and your polearm firmly between your fingers, you turned in your spot and made your way over towards Alatus, who had been waiting silently for the sparring match between you and your god to end.

Morax’s eyes followed you as you approached your fellow Yaksha, observing as you smiled wide towards him and initiated a cheerful conversation, in which Alatus had nodded and sent an attentive smile as indication that he acknowledged your words, before bowing in respect towards Rex Lapis, a bow in which Morax swiftly returned. Finally you two both pivoted, Alatus leading the both of you towards the rest of the Yaksha all conversing just a lengths away.

Morax watched as you approached the group, slowly descending to sit on the grass besides Alatus and Bonanus, being swayed into a laugh by something Bosacius had boast about. It was in that moment Morax’s morale felt almost swayed for just a moment. There you were, spouting all the exact words he’d been waiting to hear for decades, slowly tempting him to trust you through your inspiring willpower and heartening morality.

Suddenly, his mind had come to from his thoughts for a moment, and it was only then he’d realised his hand had seemingly subconsciously made its way towards the bell, caressing the material as he watched you interact with your friends. You were starting to become a reoccurring theme in his life- and with this, he turned from his position and made his way off the grass field -And he wasn’t sure if he was too apposed to the idea either.

It was to be guarded by someone Rex Lapis trusted not with his life but with his nation, and that a person he'd never found. That was until an old comrade of his suddenly wasn’t much of a comrade anymore. The war had been raging for so long, he'd hardly remembered the date anymore. A sea of red mirages the landscape of Liyue, rocks carved by his own fingers stained with the blood of his enemies. Rex Lapis heaves a breath as he finds the strength to pull his polearm out of the chest of whichever poor soul had challenged him with intent, finally finding a moment to take a look at his fellow comrades- his Yaksha's fighting beside him.

There he'd find his people, eyes glancing over each one of his 6 Yaksha's- first was Bosacius, releasing an array of attacks upon enemy immortals. Then he'd noticed Bonanus and Indaris fighting side by side, soon was Menogias swiftly dodging a sharp attack and then Alatus plowing though enemies with his jade spear gleaming.

Finally his eyes glanced towards her. You. Vision gleaming and skin coated with a layer of sweat as you swung your spear out of one enemy and straight into another, finally clearing the last of them in your immediate surrounding area. At the moment of calm, you found a second to collect yourself, wiping the splatter of blood that had landed upon your face. It was a deep blue color, unlike the blood you'd been expecting to see and it took a moment to remember that these enemies weren't human. They were just like you.

It was almost as if, the madness of it all had fully consumed you for just a moment, the madness of the war, the fighting, the idea of killing adepti just like yourself. that was until you felt the gleaming gaze boring into the side of your body. In a split moment your eyes had snapped up, making direct eye contact with the man you were here to protect, your god, your diety, your purpose. And everything seemed to snap into place all of a sudden.

Rex Lapis' eyes found yours, and he'd almost let the shock he felt at how tormented your face looked for a moment consume him, if he hadn't taken complete notice of the way his heart fluttered when you looked at him instead. It was as if he was enraptured by you, in that moment all he could see was you.

The screaming of adepti, the weight of his pole arm, the blood on your face, on your clothes, on your hands - he was blind to it all, all except you. Archons, how hadn't he noticed you before, you were absolutely breathtaking and he was stupid for not seeing it before. For the first time he supposed, Guizhong was right.

In that moment, he'd realized that he might have found something he'd finally want to pursue that wasn't bloodshed, maybe he'd play his cards right and try his luck with you. You who's eyes were gleaming at him with wonder. You, who stood drenched in the blood of his enemies, protecting him and his nation. You, who suddenly raised your spear above your shoulder with murderous intent and launched it forward with as much force pummeling straight towards him.

What?!

Morax's eyes finally fleet from your glowing form and followed as the spear suddenly blew straight past and into the chest of a man beside him, watching as he dropped to the ground along with a sword that clattered before him. He stared for a moment before glancing back up to you suddenly before him, hands running down his shirtless figure and along his golden arms searching for any wounds.

The other yaksha's had taken note of the situation and were currently making their way towards the two of you in extreme worry for their god. In the meantime you were doting over him with an extremely worried expression yourself, sputtering words of fear for his health and berating him for not being more aware of his surroundings, yet all he could focus on was the lingering touch of your hands against his body and how amazing the reaction his body gave felt. Oh yeah, Guizhong was definitely right. And he was gonna be trying his luck with you.

Someone he'd fought alongside, someone he'd christened a warrior - a yaksha - with his own two hands, someone he'd renamed and given a new life to suddenly wasn't just a loyal worshipper anymore.

"No longer are you to be commanded by demons, from now on you are a vigilant Yaksha fighting for the protection of Liyue. You are, Acestia."

As the man bestowed your new name upon you, you couldn't help but gaze up into his breathtaking features with wonder, eyes gleaming in wander as your body knelt before your new god, the man that had saved you from your nightmare, pulled you from the grasps of demons who'd had a rule over you for years.

And with one final statement, you were his. "Yes Rex Lapis."

He'd seen her for more then what she was with hands stained of blood.

You eyes opened in a start, breath heaving and head spinning at the sudden awareness. You honestly hadn't a clue how you'd gotten here.

Though you'd noticed you weren't in any immediate danger - being nestled comfortably in the hideout Liyues warriors were using as shelter for the time being, something within you told you to panic. 

Breathing was becoming harder a task, more a chore, and your eyes were welling with unwilling tears that began to leak down your face. Your hands lifted earnestly to swipe the rogue tears away all until your pupils made contact with the thick golden liquid staining your hands from your palms to the tips of your fingers. 

In a moment of hysteria, a morbid shriek escaped your mouth, thrashing your hands away at your sides in a dire attempt to wipe the adepti blood from your hands. To no avail. Each time you brought your hands back up to your eyeline it seemed like there was more blood then the last. Your crying was becoming heavier, cries for help becoming louder and it wasn't until an arm grabbed your own that you realized there was someone besides you.

Turning to look at the culprit, Rex Lapis stood besides you in a worried daze, eyes searching every inch of your body as you cried in hysterics, begging for relief from the bloodied mess before you.

"Acestia! Acestia! Are you okay?! Please Acestia talk to me." 

It seemed he'd been screaming at you for quite some time- if the slight fade in of his voice was any indication to you. Slowly blinking up at him, your tears began to slow. "M-My hands.... What have I done."

Looking down upon your trembling hands held up to your face, Rex Lapis furrowed his brows in confusion. "Acestia, I-... I don't understand."

"They're stained with blood. Who've I hurt this time?"

"Acestia, dear- your hands are..." It took a moment for Morax to find his words. "Your hands are clean. You haven't hurt anyone."

But his words were of no comfort to you, instead you looked down, head hanging as your tears fell to the floor instead. "I'm a murderer. My own people. Slaughtered by my own hands."

"Acestia this is war, I don't know what outcome you expect-"

"No!" You'd never raised your voice like that to your god, yet in your hysterics you didn't seem to care. Neither did he. He just wanted you safe and calm again.

"Not the war! Before... I- I hurt people. I hurt Adepti. I-I'm a monster."

Finally it had dawned on him. The hysterics, the 'blood', the duty you felt to him and this nation. You were haunted by a past that was never yours to decide on. A pawn you were to demons, and in turn those demons haunt you as a knight.

"Never." He'd whispered, suddenly your hands, your bloodied and stained hands had been clenched between two, much bigger. But unlike you'd expected, the blood didn't smear, the blood hadn't transferred onto Morax's hands and stained his as well. No, instead  they'd stayed dry and as he leant back to expose your hands to you once more, the blood on your own had dissipated too. Like it was never there- because it was never there. 

"You can never be a monster for something you didn't choose. You survived a previous life and you've repented for your sins a million times over with every slash of your polearm you've sent to protect this nation." 

The words that escaped the Archons mouth had your own hanging wide open. This man, your god was vouching for you - too you. He was singing your praise and holding your hands as he'd done it.

Your god was worshipping you. 

It was almost too good to be true, almost a dream come to life and you would have believed it was if it wasn't for the sudden proximity Morax had gained on you. He was so close all of a sudden, hood down leaving nothing on his upper body but the connecting cloth over his shoulders leading into his long robe behind him. 

"I know you don't believe me. But what better forgiveness then the forgiveness of your god?" And with not a moment to spare he'd leant forward to catch your lips in what would be the first kiss of millions to come. 

She wasn't just his yaksha anymore but was soon becoming his angel. Only then, when the tides had changed, when the war stopped and harmony soon fall upon Liyue, only when his Yaksha had become his lover, for the first time had he entrusted the bell to someone else.

"I-... I want you to be the new keepsake of the Cleansing Bell."

Suddenly his hands which lay upon your body felt like ice as he spoke. The man lay besides you, lips pressed against the top of your head as he spoke his words quietly and meekly- very unlike Morax indeed.

"What was that?"

"Dont pretend you didn't hear me..." His eyes finally glanced down, your own head creasing up to look at him besides you, his bare body against your own bare body. "I meant it. I trust you with it."

"But Morax, you haven't trusted a soul with it in over 1000 years, why m-"

"Don't you dare question why it would be you while I lay naked besides you." His words were light hearted and humorous, a tone which you couldn't help but smile at. He truly was the most perfect person to you. "This bell isn't just a keepsake. Its a promise- I... I want to be besides you for the rest of your life, and I truly do mean that. You've been with me through hundreds of years of turmoil and war and now my nation has finally found the peace It was seeking. And I... Ive found it too."

You were silent listening to the Archon speak. Through years of trust building, comradeship, friendship and now relationship, he'd always managed to flip the tables and worship you with his words instead. Though this seemed different, this seemed... Life long... Eternal.

"Please say you'll take it. Please say you'll take me too."

And with one final statement, you were his. "Yes, Rex Lapis."

Someone who had still held that bell up until the… passing of said archon.”

“So, the bell was like… a symbol of unity?” Paimons eyes gazed upon Zhongli in wonder, seemingly entranced by the long lineage of love between the former Archon and the former Yaksha.

Finally, Zhongli smiled widely, “In the same way mortals exchange vows and rings, Rex Lapis passed off the Cleansing Bell to her all those years ago. Though as times changed and Rex Lapis... I, made the decision to denounce my archon title, I also thought it fitting to instead follow mortal traditions as well- so, now we pass off the cleansing bell to the Exuvia - Rex Lapis’ old form. And in this new mortal one we exchange rings instead.” And as the story came to a close, the couple extended their hands forward to showcase two equally shiny Cor Lapis ring upon each ring finger.

zhongli x adeptus!gn!reader

(all fluff no angst ur welcome <3)

Once upon a time, in the land of Geo, there was an adeptus who lived among humans. They were well known all across Liyue for their beauty, so much so that suitors from all over the land came to ask for their hand in marriage. However, the adeptus thwarted all proposals. They set forth a contract - whoever wished to marry them would first have to bring them three specific gifts...

Everyone in Liyue Harbor is familiar to some extent with the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor's consultant Zhongli. This, of course, means that as his spouse, they're also familiar with you. Whenever the two of you go out on a walk together, all sorts of people would stop and chat with you - to see how the two of you are doing, or to implore Zhongli's seemingly endless knowledge on all sorts of subjects. Needless to say, thanks to this, as well as your husband's refined tastes, you know most merchants that the city had to offer. This often comes in handy - such as now, when your wedding anniversary rapidly approaches and you find yourself at a loss. The two of you have long moved past the need for gifts to mark special occasions, yet this doesn't stop you from wanting to show your continued appreciation for him.

...Many approached them, but it soon became apparent that this was a task impossible for any mortal to accomplish. Their fame continued to spread regardless. Eventually, even Rex Lapis, the Lord of Geo himself, heard of their impossible challenge. He headed off to the adeptus' residence to investigate the matter for himself. Yet even the ever stoic archon was swept away by their immeasurable beauty...

As you peruse the streets in search of inspiration, you overhear Zhongli's favourite storyteller Tian narrating to a small crowd in the restaurant. You move closer to listen as well - you quite enjoy hearing how exaggerated the stories of your husband's exploits become with time. You often tease him about it, only for him to tease you back about the many rumours about adepti that swirl around Liyue. Regardless of its accuracy though, Tian's story gives you an idea and when he's done, you approach him.

"Ah, good day. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I was wondering if you would do me a favor," you say, "You see, mine and Zhongli's wedding anniversary is coming up and I wanted to request a particular story for the occasion."

You go on to explain your idea to him and then have to bear the embarrassment when he coos at you. Still, he gladly agrees to help you out.

..."I have come to judge for myself," said Rex Lapis, "Whether you have made a fair contract. After all, a contact with truly impossible conditions cannot be a fair one."

"You're welcome to try your hand at it yourself, my lord. You'll find all is accomplishable," responded the adeptus, "And should you choose to bring me the three items I request, then I shall certainly uphold my end of the contract."

And thus did Rex Lapis set off to win the adeptus' heart...

On the day of your anniversary, you wake up to Zhongli kissing your forehead. You try to keep him in bed with you, but his early riser habits prove a much too formidable opponent. He chuckles softly at your antics, then picks you up without warning and brings you with him to the kitchen. It catches you off guard and your laughter echoes in the hall of your home. He cooks you breakfast as you discuss your plans for the day and you make sure to tell him that dinner is on you. He seems intrigued by your secrecy and your giddiness, but you only tell him to wait and see. You spend your day with him visiting all your favourite spots around Liyue and recalling your favourite memories, using your adeptal powers to make sure normal people don't see you. When evening comes you go back to the harbor and take a seat in his favourite restaurant. As agreed upon, Tian begins the story you requested from him - the legend of how Rex Lapis met his spouse.

"He's never told that one before." Zhongli remarks, surprised, when the story begins. "I assume this is your doing, dear?"

"I simply suggested he expand his repertoire, is all." You smile innocently and he fondly rolls his eyes at you.

...First, they requested a treasure unheard of - silver with the shine of gold and gold with the shine of silver. And so Rex Lapis gathered his most trusted adepti companions. Under the brightest glow of the moon and the strongest shine of the sun, they worked tirelessly and eventually forged a ring. The ring could change its material from gold to silver and from silver to gold purely on the whim of its wearer. And when it was finished, the Lord of Geo immediately began his work on the second request.

For their second gift the adeptus demanded a breath neverending. For this, Rex Lapis travelled to the land of freedom and requested help from his old friend - the God of the Wind. Rex Lapis brought him a qingxin from the highest peak of Liyue. Then, Barbatos summoned a wind from the air and had it gently rustle the petals of the flower. And so Rex Lapis had his second gift, for the petals would tremble unbothered by time until the wind itself runs out of breath.

In the final request, the adeptus said this - a place of eternal peace and serenity, undisturbed and safe from harm. Rex Lapis alone raised the ground and created a mountain, and on the mountain - a house. This house would be accessible only to them and those whom they chose to welcome inside. And then, only when he had all of his gifts, did Rex Lapis finally return to the adeptus' abode.

"I have judged your contract fair and its conditions fulfillable," said the Lord of Geo, "And I bring you the items you requested - a ring fit to your whims, a flower to compliment your beauty and a home to be shared in everlasting love. For i swear to never leave your side, to never upset you, to never let harm befall you as long as I live, and yet beyond that."

"Your gifts are most ingenious, Rex Lapis," laughed the adeptus then, "And yet I wonder if you noticed? These feats were meant only for you to accomplish, and you alone..."

"I do hope the two of you enjoyed the story," Tian approaches you when the crowd dissipates after his performance. "And happy anniversary!"

"Thank you kindly. It was certainly quite a dramatic rendition." Zhongli says and you can't help but delight in the slight blush on his cheeks.

"Sounded pretty accurate to me," you laugh, "Though who can say? The original events are lost to time, after all."

"Indeed, we can only guess as to what truly transpired. Please, enjoy the rest of your dinner." Tian bids you both goodbye, and yet, he can't help staring at your wedding ring. He is almost sure it was silver when the two of you last spoke. It must be the lights and the story getting to him...

...And so did Rex Lapis and his beloved set the tradition of Liyue for generations to come. A ring, a flower and a home, but most important of all - a contract fit for two to honor until the end of time...

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