Hospitaiforbrokensouls-blog - Dying

You know what sucks even more than being mentally ill? Being self-aware about it. Like you constantly know that your behavior is a problem and you know exactly what it is and exactly what’s causing it, but nobody believes you because you’re mentally ill.

“I’m lonely. And I’m lonely in some horribly deep way and for a flash of an instant, I can see just how lonely, and how deep this feeling runs. And it scares the shit out of me to be this lonely because it seems catastrophic.”

— (via flame)

i wish i was better

“You were like an ocean. You looked calm and you promised me you’d never hurt me so I jumped in with no precautions. Nobody spotted me, I didn’t have any floatation devices, I was just my unprotected self. It was great at first. The water was warm and calm and I was happy to be where I was. But after a while you started to get choppy and a little cold, I was still above water but I was beginning to get scared. I stayed still and told myself it would calm down soon… but I was wrong. Your waves got higher, your water felt like ice in my veins and you were pulling me under. I couldn’t breath and I begged for you to help me but you couldn’t hear me over your own loud noise. You slammed me against the rocks and almost drowned me before you threw me to the shore. Even though it was nice to breathe again, I was cold, tired, in pain, and lost. So now I’ve been finding my way back home on my own and trying to heal myself. But all of this happened for a reason, you’ve taught me some things. The next time I go to the ocean I’m going in slow.”

— To the boy who broke me… (via no-understxnding)

“There are days when I look at you and I don’t see the boy I fell in love with. The boy who used to put in effort just to see me smile, the boy whose day wasn’t complete until he heard about mine, the boy who used to hold my hand because he knew i was scared of the dark, the boy who would write letters to me unexpectedly. I don’t see the boy I fell in love with, just another boy who tells me he loves me.”

— //nikitagupta

“How do you tell people? How do you tell them that you’re exhausted even though you slept for 10 hours? How do you tell them that you need a break from talking and smiling and simply being near them? How do you tell them that although you love them, you so desperately need to be alone tonight?”

— Midnight thoughts (I’m burnt out)