I Wish I Was Better

The first lie

She would brush out my hair

and tug hard at the knots

When I cried

she would look me straight in the eyes

exasperated

she’d say

It doesn’t hurt.

I always fall in love with the illusion. But what can I say? It feels so good.

— Rose O.

“I’m numb and alone. What I want more than anything is to feel something and have someone. But I can’t, I’ve pushed every single person who ever cared away, to protect them from myself . I’ve isolated myself with the loneliness and with no contact to other people my feelings are none existent .”

-Excerpt from a book I’ll never write (excerptsfromstories)

“my life is an out of body experience disconnected from everything around feelings i just don’t know my mind is a black hole and all those sleepless night knowing i’m never going where i want to go”

— t.m.

“How do you tell people? How do you tell them that you’re exhausted even though you slept for 10 hours? How do you tell them that you need a break from talking and smiling and simply being near them? How do you tell them that although you love them, you so desperately need to be alone tonight?”

— Midnight thoughts (I’m burnt out)

The depression won today. Staying home from school because it’s too hard to get out of bed. I just woke up and I already know the days going to consist of suicidal thoughts and sleeping the pain away.

ok to rb.

you hate when people see you cry because you want to be that strong girl. at the same time though, you hate how nobody noticed how broken you are.