If MC Actually Went To Duskwood:

MC: ...This is one of those moments where it doesn't really matter what I have to say, isn't it?

MC: I just ended a four year relationship.

Jake: Oh, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?

MC: Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine. It wasn’t my relationship.

*Dan and Jessy fighting from across the room*

Julius: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird. But emotionally? Imagine the toll.

Julius: I CAN'T DO IT!

MC, having a crisis: I CAN'T EITHER!

Julius: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

Tim: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Julius:

Julius: I appreciate it,

Julius: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

Bernd: Julius-

Julius: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Lucy: Julius we gotta-

Julius: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Julius: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Julius, motioning to Mr. Crow and J.K. Night: NOT FUCKING THIS

Roxy: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming

MC: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak

MC: You can de-escalate any situation by simply saying, 'Are we about to kiss?

'MC: Doesn't work for getting out of speeding tickets, by the way.

Julius: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.

Bernd, not looking up from his book: Spear.

Julius: BLOCKED.

Julius: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.

MC: Julius no.

Roxy: Mistlefoe.

MC: Please stop encouraging them.

Players replaying duskwood be like:

MC: Tonight, one of you will betray us.

Jake: Is it me, MC?

MC: No, it’s not you.

Jessy: Is it me, MC?

MC: It’s not you either.

Richy: Is it me, MC?

MC:

MC, mockingly: Is IT mE MC?