I Really Lovwe The Vway You Vwrite. Genuinely Beautiful Prose.

i think i responded to something you posted somewhere but i figured i'd just reach out here instead!

from my own kin stuff and source and everything, i don't know if you've gone through the magnus archives before but what you're saying sounds a lot like someone deep within the beholding to me. that need to watch, to know things even if it destroys you or others, the intake of others stories. it reminds me of jon honestly with the guilt aspect of it, or maybe even jonah or elias, maybe the archivist from the magnus protocol.

either way, you're always welcome to reach out and talk about your own experience or process of figuring things out!

-marcus keay (non-cannon magnus archive)

@the-neon-attic

I've been hearing that name come up a lot actually, among a few others. The need to watch in spite of the destruction it brings is a good way to put this feeling, you certainly hit the nail on the head there.. There's something more to this though, it's parasitic in nature. I feel as though I'm filling a hollow part of me that's raw and hungry with the mismatched parts of others' memories just to feel whole, and I never have a way to compensate them for this favor. Not in a way that really matters, or makes up for the damage. If that is what the beholding feels like, then I might just have a few questions for you.

HAPPY IDES OF MARCH, JULES!

well. maybe not so happy for you.... 🗡 🗡 🗡 /silly

Tis the season, I suppose. In any case, it's nice to see you again Fallen.

Knock Knock,

I'm not sure how you're going to answer this without either revealing who you are or making a new ask but alright--

Who's there?

Dear friends,

I am Ahmad, a father struggling to keep my family alive in Gaza under the relentless devastation of war. 💥💔 My children are facing hunger 🍞, thirst 💧, and the bitter cold ❄️ without a safe shelter 🏠. The situation is unbearable, and our lives now depend on your compassionate hearts.

This is not just a message; it’s a plea for survival. 🙏

We are in desperate need of your help to secure the basics: food 🥫, water 💧, and a place to call home 🏠. Your donation, no matter how small, can mean the difference between life and death for my family. ❤️

⏳ Don’t wait. Every second counts. ⏳

Please help us now or share our story with the world 🌍. You might be the reason my children survive this nightmare.

🙏 Don’t let my children face this darkness alone. Be the light 🌟 that brings hope back into our lives.

💖 Donate now and save us from this unimaginable suffering. 💖

Thank you to every kind soul extending a hand of mercy. ❤️‍🩹✨

You can donate to ahmedmoneersblog through their gofundme, linked in their pinned post

yo do u have a kin list anywhere 👀

That's a good question--

As of right now, I do not have a kin list. This is due to the fact I still have not been able to find a source that completely matches my kin memories. That being said, I do have a list of sources I have been looking into in hopes of finding a connection which I will list here though if anyone finds any familiarity in me or the memories I depict in my posts, I urge you to reach out to me with any insight you can offer;

https://www.tumblr.com/imitative-magpie/777294067956580352/while-i-have-the-time-to-keep-up-on-my-blog?source=share 

hello boss !! im an Elias AND Jon fictionkin and you said you wanted to interact with them (I think . don't respond to this ask if I'm wrong I'll have to explode /silly) but I'm curious as to what that interaction would entail .. would it just be questions about our canon mems, or would it be something more? only reason I ask is because I don't have very many mems regarding either of them , and I don't want to disappoint you with my lack of . memories , or helpful information .

That's a good question, I'm glad you've asked. While I do have a complicated relationship with memories specifically, I won't limit my search to that. Any information you have to offer that is relevant; Your journey in finding your kintype, any shifts you may have experienced.. These are all things that I would find incredibly helpful at the moment. Thank you for reaching out 

Mitochondrial Gene Study on Mice Has Revealed Possible Links to Memory

Researchers used mitochondrial gene editing to model genetic disorders in mice. While previous attempts have been made, in-depth phenotypic changes resulting from mitochondrial gene knockout, for example the alterations in observable characteristics when a specific gene is inactivated, remain largely undocumented. So, researchers used a programmable DNA base editing technology to analyze the genotypic and phenotypic impacts of knocking out the ND5 mitochondrial gene, and they found profound impacts on brain function, metabolism, and thermoregulation. They employed a specialized DNA editing tool to induce mutations in the ND5 mitochondrial gene, disrupting energy production and causing learning deficits, hippocampal atrophy, and obesity. I just found this incredibly fascinating as this is the closest we've gotten to documenting when a gene is inactivated like that.

Otherkin beings, alterhumans, nonhumans, therians.

Send me an ask and tell the world what you are. Use as many or few words as you want without censoring yourself. It can be written like a poem or straight forward and simple. Do what feels right for you.

My goal is to collect and archive until we have enough entries to make a zine out of it that can be downloaded and passed around for free. I want to make our voices less quiet. 

How it works

You send me an ask. Short and simple example:

“I’m a ___.”

I will post your ask (I'll use the queue to space the posts out a bit) and put it down on the zine as:

“I’m a ___.” -Anonymous

If you don’t want to be cited as anonymous, you need to tell me. Like this, for example:

“I’m a ___. -Blue”

You can ad as much information as you want. An example:

“I’m a ___. -Blue, they/them, 21”

That would look like this in the zine:

“I’m a ___.” -Blue, they/them, 21

I hope I explained it in an easy to understand way!

I will cite the asks exactly how I receive them, including things that I think are typos. I don’t want to accidentally change something that was done on purpose. If you want to correct a mistake you’ve made, just comment under the respective post. I can’t allow this for anons because I need a way to know the request comes from the being that made the original ask.

Update

We already have over 30 entries! Given that number, I can confidently say that this zine will happen. I already started working on it. I'm excited! 

(Some of these entries are bringing me to tears omg /pos)

An Update;

So far, my break from latching onto others’ memories is going well! My dreams still haunt me all the same, I try not to remember them– a myriad of eyes, a cacophony of screams in the dark, these will be lost to the sands of time, but if I just ignore them I won't have to breathe life back into the horror of it all by posting on here. Besides, wouldn't that be cheating..?

There were times that I felt like I wanted to go into my inbox, an anxious sort of feeling that  tells me I have to look, but after 6 days ignoring it, this is seemingly fairly manageable! On an unrelated note, did you know you can grit your teeth hard enough to make fractures in them? 

Ocean Eyes

There is an eye at the bottom of the ocean, belonging to an old god whose name has been forgotten, but still leaves echoes in the memory of man. It's there, under the rolling waves and aquatic life. In a constant staring contest with our sun that's dripping crimson with the blood of so many who have given into their fears, the eye gazes not just on that sun but through every life that has ever lived in this reality we've found ourselves in, and so many others.

 When it finally blinks, the world will end. This is a fact. The Earth will begin to swallow us whole, and nature will take back what we've stolen from it. Bridges collapsing and headlights careering into the star filled glinting sea, into doors that were never meant to be opened. Fear and panic in the air, do you feel it too?.. and when that eye blinks, our sun will too. I want to look down into those depths just so I can reassure myself it's fine. ‘It was just a dream, a terrible, terrible dream that you had because you went into cardiac arrest,’

But it's still wriggling in my brain, pulling in and out of my periphery like a tide. So I think..

I'm going to run a little experiment. I've mentioned my urges- 

My fixation with hearing others experiences and memories, my drive to feel that connection, and to pick at the more distressing details of said memories. I would like to stop completely, just to see how uncomfortable I'd get. I want to document how long it takes until my resolve cracks, just to get a sense of how trapped I really am in this cycle.

So, if I don't post for a while, my blog isn't dead! I'm simply trying not to fall into a pattern that I've been feeding into for the past 3 months. I will post the results when I feel I've gotten satisfying results.

A List Of Fictional Crushes I've Had Since The Age Of 9

It’s actually rather funny

My love life is near nonexistent, and it’s understandable why; I’ve never exactly been a looker, the idea of intimacy sets me on edge because how can you trust someone enough to hold that level of companionship with them? That being saaiiiid..

The nice thing about fictional crushes is that they can never leave you, or disappoint you (or even worse, you disappoint them!) Yes, I held the characters I read about all near and dear to my heart. So, here’s a comprehensive list of all the fictional crushes I’ve had since the age of 9, all in chronological order for your convenience:

Morticia Adams (The Addams Family 1991)

Frank Zhang (Heroes of Olympus Percy Jackson series)

Delores Claiborne (Title Name, Self Explanatory)

Monica Geller (Friends)

The Reporter Courtney Cox Played (Scream. This Crush Probably Wouldn't Have Happened if I Hadn't Watched Friends)

Peeta Melmark (The Hunger Games Series, Book Version Only)

Olivia Benson (Law and Order SVU)

Griffin (The Invisible Man 1933, Movie Version Only) ((I also need to clarify that a lot of my thoughts about Griffin are admittedly out of character))

Sam Tully (ASoIaF AND Game of Thrones)

Whoever It Was Rosario Dawson Played in (Death Proof)((It was the damn kick at the end)))*

Samwise Gamgee (Mostly the Movie Adaptations of Lord of the Rings)

If there's anything writing this down has taught me, it's that I have a clear type in both genders, and I'm of the opinion that the two of them would make the perfect couple, somewhere far *far* away from me 

(Feel Free To Reblog With Your Own Fictional Pinings)