Guess What If Anyone Knows I Exist Here

i feel tonight as a being wrapped in old memories.

They are cloying and drip with slick and cold silver strings. A web of fear to enclose my little heart.

In this darkening void, i knew where the edge was. I still willingly walked out onto thin air.

I could understand that I, myself, am a being of lack and disgust

I know what makes a void like me too heavy for any surface to support

Yet how stupid am I to be surprised when i fell.

I have been caught in such a web again,

my fingers sliding off it’s wet surface,

deeper and deeper i slip away from the surface.

I can do nothing but grasp at empty air.

I wonder when the dark will claim me again.

sometimes i just feel sad and so i must eat rocks and scratch little stars into the sandpaper walls that i live in

ive been needing to say more words lately.

ive told my dear all the ones I needed to.

so now i shall say them here.

coalescence

heathen

fortuitous

darling

charismatically

prestidigitation

opal

conartist

preordained

okay. good enough for now. I’ll be back with some sunlight next time.

i think that burrowing into my blankets like a little winter rabbit burrows into hills of snow is lovely actually

sometimes i see someone existing and i just get so happy that they do.

like a warm summer breeze and grass and cat fur and head thrown back in joy.

Lovely people are just my favourite

Fun quarentine activity: Sprinkle grass killer in the shape of a body on your lawn and when the grass dies it will look lile someone is buried there then one day dig out the hole and if your neighbors ask act nervous and say someone else must have done it

more fun activity for people living by farmland: crop circles in the shape of a giant. bonus point if you surround the area with beanstalks 

ah so i have ascended.

and i am not lonely up here in the sky.

Me and my pebble brain

that’s the one trouble with this country: everything, weather, all, hangs on too long. like our rivers, our land: opaque, slow, violent; shaping and creating the life of man in its implacable and brooding image.

forecast accurate / a southern gothic photo series from my sophomore year 2018

i have a crush on a girl, and like- im stupid. so that’s a struggle

sunlight come run away with me

please let’s find warm butterfly kisses in between the cool evening spaces of our lips

entwine fingers like flower crowns

god i gaze at the sky and there is simply a vast expanse that holds nothing but my dreams of you.