Matching Marks

Matching Marks

The Badminton story-arc finally catches up with Stede in 109 and he is forced to sign the Act of Grace. Ed is caught up also, and chooses to sign the Act partly to save Stede’s life. We know it’s a pseudo marriage contract, making their individual marks of commitment for ten-years, a lifetime then. Ed does so willingly; but later, Stede feels the guilt of Ed’s perceived sacrifice.

As a mirror to 109, the Ned Low story-arc finally catches up with Ed in 206. This time, Stede is caught up in Ed’s mess. We see matching marks again, this time by way of torture-branding. It’s a subversion of the face-slashing during matelotage. A more painful and dangerous mirroring of 109. This time Ed feels the guilt; but we know Stede would remain by Ed’s side here even given a choice, just as Ed remained committed to Stede in Act of Grace.

Both blame themselves for the other’s sacrifice and the subsequent fallout. They have marked or blemished their loved one with their faults.

The ‘ruined’ one interestingly is the catalyst for moving the relationship forward each time. It’s as if the development in their character allows them to be braver, truer to who they are and what they want.

The ‘ruinee’ is the one to run subsequently; partly because of the belief they’ve destroyed their loved one, but also because the change causes them to run smack into their own unresolved trauma. They appropriate the other’s personal journey as a commentary on their own perceived flaws:

I am soft, and have therefore made him soft

I am violent, and he is violent now because of me

None of this is true. Ed was attracted to softness before he met Stede. Stede was drawn to aspects of violence before he met Ed. And neither of them is wholly soft or particularly violent, nor are they responsible for the other’s moving towards one aspect or the other.

They realise finally the influences they have on each other is, for the most part, positive. They’re good for each other. They don’t need to be whole or fully-healed to be together. Healing takes a lifetime, and they can do so alongside their developing relationship. They need also to recognise the other has agency over their own character growth, and to learn to not talk past each other. It won’t always be an easy straight road, but they love each other enough to succeed.

They’re both soft, gentle men who will commit violence to protect those they love. And it’s meeting the other which has allowed them to go on a journey of self-discovery; not through imposed changes, but by giving each the room to grow. The only lasting mark, the only mark that is true, is the mark of love they’ve left on the other. A mark that gives them space to breathe and grow, mess up and try again. That’s the real mark. That’s the permanent ink.