Just A Little Oscar Wilde Angst For You All.

Writing is my obsession, my passion. My relationship with it is one of the most complex and agonizing and richly vexing that I have in my life.

Julianna Baggott (via wordsnquotes)

Julian doesn’t believe in ghosts, but he’d be lying if the quiet of campus in the dark didn’t make him uneasy, and he had his phone out as a flashlight by the time he got to the garden. At least it didn’t take him too long to find the bonfire itself.

And he gravitated to sit near the first person he spotted that he actually knew to any degree, his roommate. He’s pretty quiet, saying as little as possible while keeping the conversation going, but Montague saying that gets a pause from Jules.

          ❝... Huh.❞ He says quietly, pushing his glasses up his nose. He’s actually wearing his glasses for once, having taken his contacts out earlier in the evening. They were starting to burn his eyes a bit, so he knew better than to keep them in. He’s sure his eyes are invisible because of that, with the flickering glare of the fire on his lenses.

That’s good. Maybe it’s not so obvious how nervous he is to even be here.

He really doesn’t know what to make of his roommate. Montague seems incredibly nice, but also like... just... a lot. Very exuberant and friendly.

A hell of a Roommate for someone like Julian to end up with ( Awkward, shy, nervous, reserved. Someone people just forget. No one would forget the likes of Montague for sure ). He’s only at this bonfire party at all because it was his roommate’s idea, and it would feel rude to not come.

          ❝Maybe it’s just because I’ve never had close friends before, but I really cannot fathom that. The social part of the college experience has legitimately never crossed my mind before now.❞

Julian is sitting cross-legged on a think fleece blanket he brought with him, and he has his writing notebook out on his lap, with a pen held loosely in his hand. He heard there were going to be Ghost Stories, and he wanted to take notes. He feels like there’s a lot that could be done with the ideas floating around this campus. There’s nothing quite like hearing people tell the spooky things they think they’ve experienced (or want us to think they experienced) for inspiration.

Though he doesn’t know why he bothers. He’s never going to go anywhere with this. Just a dumb hobby. He clicks his pen a few times, before looking back up at Montague.

          ❝Could you not just... keep in contact with your college friends upon graduating, or uh dropping out? Or would that somehow not be the same?❞

no matter how much time montague spent away from the university, he’d never forget the feeling of just walking through the gardens during the night. right now, the ethereal feeling was mixed with excitement for the impromptu rendezvous, but he could recognize it nonetheless. montague never believed in magic. he used to say that he met too many faithful people, learned too many conflicted myths to actually believe in any of them, so he’d never say that château campus was supernaturally magical. however, not even him could deny that the university carried some kind of magic. it was the same feeling he got when he hiked up a huge mountain just to have the view up there remind him that the world was a huge place. naturally magical. 

he took a deep breath, stretched his arm to catch one more bottle of beer and rearranged himself on the blanket in which he was seated.                                                 i’m serious, ok? the true reason i came back is this. not the fact that i should graduate before i turn thirty and i’ve been in this college for almost a decade already …  i missed the people and this moments. this is what make the whole college experience worth it.           it wasn’t exactly a lie. of course, he had a time limit to graduate because of his father, but it wouldn’t be the first time montague went against the man. the thing that made the classes bearable was these moments, with the hockey team, his friends and his future friends.

imagining moving in with a lover and mixing my books with their books in our bookshelves... might faint

@srphne liked 

He’s glad to see that Aimée is here too. He can’t overstate how much a friendly face makes him feel less nervous. He’s only here at all because he didn’t want to disappoint his roommate. Montague seems very nice, but also like... a lot.  Just a lot to deal with, and Jules really doesn’t want disappoint him so soon after they’ve met. So... he’s here.

          ❝Would it be rude to leave an impromptu Bonfire your roommate planned early?❞ His tone is joking, but he really does want to leave. He’s nervous around people in general, and this- with so many people around- is worse. So Aimée being here helps a little.

          ❝Kidding, o-of course. I want to stay for the ghost stories at least. I’m very interested to hear what other people might think they’ve seen here...❞

Wanting to hear those stories and not wanting to disappoint Montague are the only things keeping him here. And he does really want to hear those stories. He even brought his notebook with him, though he’s not mentioning that detail to Aimée.

Teatro La Fenice, Venice Italy

me being ignored (now that i am mature): this is fine i suppose

Anais Nin, Mirages: The Unexpurgated Diary of Anais Nin, 1939-1947

yeah libraries are cool but have you ever found a library with a secret doorway disguised as a bookshelf that leads to a smaller, hidden library filled with ancient books full of mysteries and forgotten knowledge? me neither and i'm sad about it