Why I Haven't Been Posting

Humans are space.. pets?  (Entry 1)

So.  I read a lot of Humans are Space Orcs and I’ve seen a couple things recently speculating on what if aliens thought humans were cute (in a puppy way) or adopted them like pets.. and I thought it was funny.  So I’d like to finally make my contribution to the content I enjoy consuming so much.  I may or may not continue writing this I honestly don’t know

...

The ship crashed on this planet I’d estimate a week ago.  It’s hard to tell time here.  From what we managed to document before the engines malfunctioned, this planet is a part of a solar system with two mother stars; the planet does a sort of figure eight around both stars.  Because of this, there isn’t any apparent nighttime.

Sorry, I’m getting sidetracked.  I suppose it’s a good idea to document what we know, but there are more pressing issues to document at the moment.  Most notably, the sapient species that inhabit this planet seems to think my crew and I are suitable housepets…  

When we crashed, our main focus was obviously trying to survive and find a viable way to contact home.  While we were scoping out the area, we came across the dwellings of the native sapients and tried to ask for help.  They had no translators though, and don’t seem to be a part of the Galactic Federation, at least in this settlement.  One simply picked our ambassador, Sarah, up & cradled her like a baby.  Not wanting to start any conflicts, we gently tried to explain that we were a civilized species and this was all rather impolite.  They ignored us and instead of putting Sarah down carried her off.  We had no choice but to follow.  The sapients are about twice the height of us, so trying to wrestle her back wasn’t a viable idea at the moment.  

The sapient took Sarah to what seemed like a sort of animal shelter, which is when the rest of the crew and I pieced together what they thought of us;  they weren’t hostile or ill-intentioned, but seemingly thought that we were ‘strays’ in need of rescue.  A few of us were rather offended at this whole ordeal, while others found it endearing.  Nick proposed we may be able to take advantage of this potential relationship, and I had to agree it was probably ideal for our safety and possible study of the sapient species to play along.  

Our arrival seemed to cause some interest in the sapients community, and not long after we were brought to the shelter a group had gathered outside.  The one who looked to be in charge was communicating with the rest.  We decided to establish our game plan while we had the chance, as it seemed likely we would end up separated.  Luckily we all already were equipped with radios, so communication wouldn’t be an issue.  I split up this notepad into equal parts so we could each document our experiences, and thankfully I had enough writing utensils for us each to use one.  

Our engineer, Lily, is going to keep an eye out wherever she ends up for potential communication home.  She’s always been handy with unfamiliar terrain & tools, I have faith that she’ll be able to macgyver something.  Until then, we’ll be saving our radio batteries for emergencies.  If this species turns out to be hostile after all, well, I suppose we’ll have to deal with that when we come to it.  Until then, we’ll just have to play up our ‘cuteness’ to keep the situation in our favor and document valuable information while we have this.. strange opportunity.  

Captain Crow signing off for now.

Entry 2

About Humans are Space Pets...

Hahahahaa heeyy guys... been a while, huh..?

Okay it's been actually, almost (correction, over) a literal year since I last posted, and I'm sorry. I'd make some excuse about how life got busy or whatever, (which did happen, but is no excuse) but y'all deserve better than that. I just logged on to look for drawing prompts and realized how popular my Humans are Space Pets series got/was and saw just how many people were asking to be added to the tag list or wondering where the story went.

I still remember a lot of what I was going to do with it, and one of my goals this year is actually to write a short story to completion.. what better way to do that then work with a story that's already started and has a fanbase of sorts?

I might shift a couple things around to make it a stronger story (Not changing anything that's already happened of course!) and it may take me a minute or two to get the character voice right again, but if this is something that enough people want, I think it would be good for me to pick it up again.

With all that being said, I'm not sure how many, if any, of you guys are left, and I may very well be screaming into the void. If you guys are still interested in the continuation of Captain Crow's story, please let me know!

Signing off for now (and hopefully for much shorter of a time than before!!)

The Author

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Humans are space.. pets? (Entry 11..?)

Masterpost

Ah, wow, this notebook has been through it, huh?  

This is Captain Crow.  It has been…  Well, as I established in past entries, it’s hard to track time here, but, it has been a significant amount of time since I last documented my findings here.  Some things have changed since my last entry.  I’m unsure how I’ll go about summarizing it.  This notebook is nearly out of pages, and my old pen dried up a while ago.  If I can recall correctly, it ran out of ink shortly after my last entry, while I was trying to illustrate a page for my hashed-together field guide of what I’ve learned of this planet.  I lost this notebook shortly after, much to my dismay.  You wouldn’t think such a thing would be possible, given how sparse the furniture is here, but I made the mistake of taking it with me when the Lumarians took me outside after my last entry, and as fate would have it, I ended up losing it out there.  I was just trying to make documentation easier, but in the end I ended up preventing it all together.  Ironic. 

Now, this whole thing has been transcribed, I’m sure, to be read elsewhere, but if it’s being read in it’s original state, I’m sure you can see that these pages are well worn with dust, and being written on with something akin to charcoal.  I found this notebook just today, blown up against the side of the fence of this yard, and I’m filling these last few pages with a writing utensil I’ve crafted myself with the resources available- It’s not that the Lumarians don’t provide ample enrichment, they just don’t seem to be able to provide specifically the things I actually want or need.  I am lucky it doesn’t rain here, or this whole thing would likely be in a completely unreadable state.

Given how little space I have, I cannot write in detail the experiences I have had since my last documentation.  However, it is safe to say that it has been more of the same of what is written here- Most of my days are spent inside the ‘house’, or roaming the yard (they let me out freely now- the fence is not scalable nor can I go under or through it; I did try), learning what I can about this planet.  Without the ability to document, I’ve been committing what I can to memory and continuing to attempt to communicate my desire for writing supplies to the Lumarians.  Unsuccessfully.

I suppose it could be considered a good thing that things have been uneventful.  It gives me more time to put together a more thought out plan of escape.  Hopefully I will be able to find a new form of documentation, either after I make my way out of this place or by somehow making something from what I have.  The Lumarians are trying to provide me with enrichment, but their idea of that is a stuffed animal of a dog and a ball of yarn.  Also, a screwdriver, for some reason?  I’m not sure where they get their ideas of what humans like from.

Running out of paper, 

Captain Crow.  𓅪

{Authors Note Below}

Hhahaaha heeyyyy guyss..... I have no excuses. But I come bearing an entry! And a lore excuse for the gap in them!

I apologize immensely for the super long wait. However, I do live by the principle that late is better than never! I figured, rather than letting this thing fall to the void out of embarrassment at my absence, you guys would probably prefer something, even if it's been ?? Two years since the last real content?

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this! I have some things planned for the next entries and I do have a projected plotline for this whole thing, I just need to get it written. I appreciate the patience of everyone who's stuck around this long and showed so much enthusiasm under my last post, even though it didn't contain any real content for the series.

See you in the next one!

{Taglist <3}

(you can comment or message me to be added or removed!  Thank you all so much for your support!)

@fishtale88 @anactualvelociraptor @sorcerersucker @ace-cat-nerd @thatquietkid108 @arataya @klltsun-25 @librowyrm @und3rta13tra5h @felicityroth @crystalalice @walk2574 @spindler-spider @automated-engineer @soren1830 @funfey @opened-rootbeercan @sataninsparkles @demon-cat-goes-woof @alwaysaslutforfic @tyltos @wolfdragonzjedimaster @questionmarksys @armourawk @nerdneeniya @princessaurax @leavemealone-s2 @d-cs @the-one-and-only-vic-lociraptor @lavendermenacetime @somesortapunk @villain-obsessed-word-nerd  @cherallasakura  @catvulture @hornethacker @girl-of-the-sea-and-stars  @lesser-lights27 @catslookingforthemanager  @mybigfatspoonielife 

Humans are space.. pets?  (Entry 6)

Masterpost

I apologize for the emotional tone of my last entry.  I have since rested and eaten a sufficient meal and will hopefully come off as less pathetic now.

The sapients returned shortly after my little mental break bearing gifts; I suppose they went off to gather the supplies necessary to keep a human happy and healthy according to their research.  I was hiding under their bed at this point, and they left some food and water on the floor at the edge of the bed.  After they left, I examined the provisions and found them to be the same type of rations my crew & I usually pack for long distance travels.  I appreciated it nonetheless and decided to eat my fill.  (The only rations I had managed to get off The Dutchess’s wreck was a couple of granola bars and a few canteens of water, most of which were split up amongst my crew shortly after the crash.)  I already felt much better after eating and rehydrating, so I decided to go see what else they were up to.  You’d be surprised how much a good meal and adequate hydration can do for your psyche.  

Both sapients had exited the dwelling out of a side door in the ‘bedroom’ by the time I was finished eating.  There wasn’t any way for me to get this door open and follow them, as the handle is above my head by a foot or so and also seems to operate differently than human made ones.  There are, however, windows.  I quickly plotted out a path to jump up to get to a windowsill, via the storage unit and a couple of miscellaneous pieces of furniture that I don’t know the name or use of.  The windows are narrow and horizontal, at the sapients eye level.  I’d say the windows themselves are about a foot tall and three or so wide.  I was able to peer out while standing on the storage unit.

Outside was strange to see after being stuck in this dwelling for over 20 hours (my best estimation).  The inside of the dwelling is furnished mostly with black stone, the furniture is a dusty reddish-brown, and the kitchen area is furnished with silver-colored metal(?) and the black stone present throughout the house.  The outside is all dusty, a lighter shade of what the furniture appears to be made of.  There are hardly any native plants in view of the window, and what I can see from there are all shrubby and short.  The ‘backyard’ to this dwelling is fenced in, in a sort of split-rail style.  From this distance, I assume it’s made of the same composite as the ‘couch’ inside, and most of the other furniture.  There aren’t any tree-like plants around anywhere nearby, so it would make sense for them to utilize the sand.

Aside from the main yard being fenced in, there are also two separate pastures.  These appear to be empty, with nothing but sand and a few twiggy plants.  There does seem to be holes in these enclosures, but it’s hard to tell from this distance.

You’re probably getting tired of my ‘apparent’ observations, nameless reader who is probably just me in the future, but you’ll have to cut me some slack.  It’s hard to see anything from this little window across the entire space, and hindsight is 20/20, if you ever get out there and see it all closer up.

In the middle space between the gates to either enclosure, the two sapients were making something.  It’s the same black stone used in most of the house.  It seemed to be clicking together with magnets, but once again it’s hard to tell from this distance.  It popped up, after a few minutes and some work from the sapients, into a quaint little doghouse.  Or that’s my best description of it, at least.  A box with a triangle roof and a little door in the front.  I could assume it’s for me, but the sapients haven’t even let me outside yet, and I doubt they trust me not to run off.  This begs the question; what it is for?  Perhaps these sapients have decided to try to adopt another intelligent species and are going to try to coop them up out there.  Time will tell.

 After setting up this little dwelling outside, the sapients returned inside.  I decided to stay where I was, sitting on top of their storage unit, purely out of curiosity as to how they’d react and also doubt that I’d be able to hop down in time without running into their legs.  They both seemed bewildered to see me so blatantly out in the open and mostly ignoring their presence (I was keeping an eye on them but acting uninterested) but they did not approach me.  They went back into the front room, and after a minute or so, I hopped down and followed them.  They were unpacking rations of human food into the cabinets above the counters, out of baskets made of the sand-composite (which seems to be a prominent structural/multi-use feature here).  They had also acquired a huge pillow- queen size mattress sized.  I hadn’t thought they would have such a thing in supply on this planet at all, as their bed was barren of anything resembling human bedding and the plants, few that there are, don’t seem to be suitable for making things like fabric.  

Apparently this was a gift for me, as upon spotting me, the smaller sapient took the pillow in their paws and placed it on the floor a few feet from me.  After they stood back up, I bolted over and grabbed it.  This may surprise you if you’ve gotten a good rest in the last 24 hours, but when you’re sleep deprived and you see the equivalent of a cloud placed in front of you, you’ll do almost anything to commandeer it as your own and drag it off somewhere to sleep.  And thus I did.  It was somewhat heavy, but lighter than an actual queen sized mattress would be, and since I could’ve dragged one of those around for a while, this was a breeze.  I got it all the way to under the sapients’ bed and passed out almost right away.  It was practically heavenly.  I’m almost positive I slept for at least 10 hours.  When I woke up, I actually felt good for the first time since the crash.  I was rested, fed, and hydrated, and I felt like I could take on the challenge of finding a way out.  The first thing I’m doing, of course, is updating this journal.  I do feel a little embarrassed about the tone of my last entry, so hopefully this one will redeem me.  Next, I’m making a plan.  I still have that human fighting spirit, I promise.

---Captain Crow.  [There’s a crude doodle of a bird next to his scribbled and underlined signature]

Entry 7

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Humans are space.. pets?  (Entry 2)

Entry 1 

Apparently, humans are in high demand as pets on this planet.  My crew & I were picked up and separated from one another in a matter of hours.  I suppose this isn’t a bad thing, it makes research easier the faster we infiltrate the households of these sapients.  However, it was somewhat surprising.  

The community is close-knit and close together, with no form of transportation other than walking that I can see.  If I had to make an estimation, I would say this species is technologically at the same place humans were around the early 20th century, although it is rather difficult to tell with everything being so different and I’m not sure that comparison is even a fair one to make.  The terrain here is almost entirely flat as far as the eye can see, and the ground isn’t particularly rough or hard to traverse.  I suppose this species may not have any reason for vehicles at this point in their societal evolution.  

The structures they live in are fairly modern in terms of appliances and comfort.  They appear to be a mud brick composite on the outside, but the inside of the building I was brought to is clean, sleek, and modern.  It stands out in stark contrast to the world outside, which is mostly red sand with spots of what resembles grass.  I hope to further study the sparse ecosystem when I get the chance.

Currently I have no such chance, as I am stuck in the human equivalent of a cat carrier.  I agree with the half of my crew that believes this treatment is somewhat demeaning, and I can’t quite get behind those (who shall remain nameless) who think it’s cute that these sapients view us as animals.  It’s all for the sake of science and survival though, I suppose.  

I’m not sure what the two sapients who picked me up plan to do with me, or why they’ve left me in this… box for so long.  I haven’t gotten a good look at these individuals yet either, and frankly, I do feel as though I am failing at my job as a scientist with these lackluster observations.  I can only hope to redeem myself as time goes on.

They’re coming back into the room they’ve left my cage in-  I’m going to hide my journal for now and update as soon as I can.  Perhaps if they’re coming to let me out I’ll find a suitable hiding spot underneath some furniture; just like the cat they seem to think I am.  --Cpt. Crow

Entry 3

Hello yes welcome

My name is Sabian! I hardly update this blog, but since tumblr doesn't let you change which blog is your primary one, this is the one everyone sees when I like posts and such. If you want to see what I'm actually up to, please check out my real blog, where I post my art!

SabianandOCs <-

Now, I know what probably 90% of you are here for- My silly little Humans are Space Orcs fic I made years and years ago. You're in luck! Even though I totally abandoned it for a while, it's sort of back with a new entry! Here's the masterpost, since this will replace it as my pinned post:

Humans are space.. pets? Masterpost!

Thanks for sticking around, if you're one of those fans, and thanks for checking me out if you're new!

I know this post is old but I've always wanted to do an illustration for it and I didn't have the skillset before so here's this

living in the countryside really strikes the fear of god into you at the most random moments. you’ll just make eye contact with a cow or stare for too long into a brook and all of a sudden you’ll think something like “these are old bones and i am merely a passing occupant” and then you have to go and put the kettle on to cope

Humans are space.. pets? {Masterpost}

A little collection of Captain Crow’s entries to his data log so far to make your reading experience a little easier :) 

If you’d like to be added to the tag list for this story & be tagged whenever a new part of the story goes up, just let me know in the comments of this post or message me directly!  

Entry 1

Entry 2

Entry 3

Entry 4

Entry 5

Entry 6

Entry 7

Entry 8

Entry 9

Entry 10

Entry 11..?

Extra 1

Ask 1

Ask 2

Current tag list (Once again let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!):

@fishtale88 @anactualvelociraptor @sorcerersucker @ace-cat-nerd @thatquietkid108 @arataya @klltsun-25 @librowyrm @und3rta13tra5h @felicityroth @crystalalice @walk2574 @spindler-spider @automated-engineer @soren1830 @funfey @opened-rootbeercan @sataninsparkles @demon-cat-goes-woof @alwaysaslutforfic @tyltos @wolfdragonzjedimaster @questionmarksys @armourawk @nerdneeniya @princessaurax @leavemealone-s2 @d-cs @the-one-and-only-vic-lociraptor @lavendermenacetime @somesortapunk @villain-obsessed-word-nerd @cherallasakura @catvulture @hornethacker @girl-of-the-sea-and-stars

Making long-form webcomics is like

Humans are space.. pets?  (Entry 8)

Masterpost

I did not have to enact my escape plan to get outside.  Unfortunately, there is an invisible barrier between the slats of the fence, so my plan was stunted there.  I’ll have to rethink.  Until then, it’s plan B; which the sapients have made a fairly easy task.  They seem to want to teach me their customs and their world.  When I was writing my last entry, I heard them chittering in the main room and decided to investigate once I finished writing.  I did so, and found them having a meal on the couch.  There was a little tiny (relative to the sapients) table set out next to the couch with human rations on it.  It might’ve been endearing to someone with a weaker will than I.  I approached cautiously, and they pretended not to notice me.  I say pretended because although they did not turn their heads or eyes, their antennas were tilted in my direction the enitre time.  I assume these are sensory organs, likely sensitive to sound or vibrations.  I watched them as I approached the little table and sat down on the floor by it.  I ate my ration while watching them pretend not to watch me.  Once I finished the food and stood up, the smaller one actually turned to look at me.  When I didn’t run away, it got up and came over to sit down about eight feet away from me.  I was prepared to bolt if need be, but I figured it would be useful to have friendly relations with the sapients if I was going to try to learn anything about them.  

The sapient chattered at me, reaching one paw out and resting it on the table.  I tried to speak to it, but obviously there was a language barrier.  After a moment of us both chattering back and forth incoherent nonsense to the other, the sapient seemed to decide to change its tune and start to mimic my speech.  It wasn’t very good at it, but it was making slightly more human sounds than before.  It was somewhat disconcerting, to be honest, but it was an effort.  I copied one of the squeaks I’d heard it make previously, and it got extremely excited and began chattering at the other sapient, who was watching intently from the couch.  

After the sapient realized I could mimic its sounds, it began to repeat one over and over again.  It put both paws on its chest and repeated the sound a few more times.  I copied it, and once again it burst into excited chatter with the other.  The sapient pointed at the one sitting on the couch and repeated the same sound.  The word they’ve taught me, which I assume is what they are called as a species, is ‘Lumarian’.  Of course I’m sure it’s spelled differently in their language, but that’s my best translation to the English alphabet.  They seemed thrilled to be teaching me, and they continued with this word until I got it close enough to their pronunciation that they were happy with it.  At this point, the second sapient Lumarian moved from the couch to sit next to the first one.  I tried to teach them the word ‘human’, but they just seemed to want to teach, not learn.  They only cooed at me when I tried to speak English words.  Even so, this was a huge leap in communication level.  After a few more minutes of it, they both got up and went to the second room.  I followed them, and they opened the door to the outside.  I was almost amazed at how easy it was-  I wasn’t even trying to convince them to let me out, they just decided to.  The first thing I did was try to test the fence, and there was some sort of barrier between the slats that made it impossible for me to get through.  It may be electromagnetic.  I think the fence slats are either entirely decorative or hold the power source for the invisible section of fence.  

Once I gave up on the fence, the Lumarians showed me a few of their native plant species; I didn’t learn any of the names well enough to write down yet, but I’m sure upon inquiry the Lumarians will tell me again.  They have a garden along the wall closest to their dwelling, wherein they grow a mix of their plants.  I’m assuming most are food plants, as I saw them eating some similar to ones I see growing here.  They didn’t show me what is in the two enclosures at the far end of the yard yet.  They ushered me inside after showing me a few plants and realizing I was more interested in looking at all the species rather than learning the names of just a few.  Once they got me inside they picked me up and subjected me to another air bath.  I am still searching for a way to show I’m very much capable of cleaning myself given the right tools.  

When they released me from the kitchen again I came back to my little hideout here under the bed to update.  I think my next major goal will be to learn more about the native wildlife and plants, and at the same time see about measuring time.  There are fluctuations in the light levels outside, but they’re so subtle it’s easy to miss.  Because there are two suns, on opposite ends of the sky, there has to be a time when both are on the edge of the horizon, in theory.  I’m not sure exactly how this planet’s orbit works, though, so I suppose I could be wrong about that.  Once I’m out in space again I’ll have to study that aspect more closely.

Captain Crow

Entry 9

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@fishtale88 @anactualvelociraptor  @dyn-mellt​  @ace-cat-nerd @thatquietkid108 @arataya @klltsun-25 @librowyrm @und3rta13tra5h